johnny: oh no mom left the white claw out. i'm about to get t'd up
cut screen to him playing guitar hero furiously
pony: what's an orgasm?
soda: that's when you fold papers into birds, dumbass
pony: that's oregano, bitch
johnny: wait you have seasonal depression? just don't use salt.
two bit: uh if we're not supposed to have late night snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?
proceeds to stand on a table and fall off of it
dally:
last year: he/him
this year: mad/horny
pony: yeah, i lied, i don't actually like sex. now put your clothes back on and listen to my cool bob dylan impression:
mAmAs In ThE fAcToRy ShE aInT gOt No ShOeS-
dally: if i had a nickel for every time someone asked me if i'm gay, i'd have two nickels. that's not a lot but it's weird that it happened twice, right?
steve: and god said let there be swag, and then i was born. i went up to him and said "um can i have an itsy bit of swag?" and he said "OOPS" and i got all the swag. drink claws, break laws, baby.
darry: any man born after 1893 can't work. all they know is rip xxxtencaion, charge they juul, live in a society, be pretend gay with they homies, eat perc 30, and ignore incoming calls from mom
two bit, in an empty parking lot at night: HEY, HAS ANYONE SEEN SECRET LIFE OF PETS TWO? ITS ACTUALLY FUNNY.
soda: oh, hey. i don't have anything funny to say. i just look really hot right now and i need every single human, breathing person to see it.
darry: YOU ACT LIKE I WONT FOLD YOU LIKE A LAWN CHAIR
ight we just gonna act like i haven't been gone for a whole ass decade and that i didn't just pull this out of my ass because i couldn't think of anything else. anyways i hope y'all are having a great day thanks for reading love you all