The minutes passed slowly. I could hear the ticking of the clock ringing in my ears, the sound both obnoxious and comforting. I didn't know how that worked, but I wasn't complaining. I could use all the comfort I could get.
"And you helped cover up your mother's murder, why?" The officer asked harshly, his gravelly voice making my lips twitch in fear. You would think that they would send two friendly female officers to interrogate me about the murder I'd witnessed and the extreme physical abuse my father put me through.
But no. They sent two men. One looked bored out of his mind and the other was angry, if not a bit confused. I guessed that he didn't know why I was so afraid.
"If your father was hurting you like he hurt me, wouldn't you?" I asked softly, looking directly at the skinny man's chin. The skinny man, Officer Robertson, grunted something to his partner who shook his head.
"I think that's enough for today. Why don't you come back tomorrow?" Mia asked, her glare sending the two officers running. Mia wanted to make sure I didn't get overwhelmed and freak myself out again, like the first time I'd had a male nurse.
It had been three days since I'd woken up in the hospital. Jaydon had already been released. No one had come to visit me yet.
I'd lost hope that they would.
"Thanks." I muttered, picking at the skin on my thumb. I didn't even feel the pain that was supposed to be there. It was just a habit.
"You're welcome. You have some visitors today. Kamrie and Thea really want to see you. It's been all over the news, you know." Mia informed me. Trust me, I knew my face had been plastered all over the news.
It took a single day before Lila had whipped every single news station doing a report on me, into shape. I couldn't have been more appreciative. I didn't need a whole other set of people talking about me like I wasn't a living, breathing human being.
The doctors were already doing that.
They were concerned by the amount of injuries that my body had sustained throughout my childhood.
Funny how they got concerned after they found out I was being abused. They were happy to listen to the weak excuse of bullies or clumsiness.
"I would like to see them. It'll be nice to see some new faces. And Lila?" I asked, looking at Mia straight in the eyes for the first time in a while. She winced at the mention of Lila and I had my answer.
"Apparently, she and the boys have been clamoring to see you since everyone was brought in. Even before you or Jaydon were awake. But the head nurse in charge, Tina, thought it would be a good idea to keep them away from you and so forbade them from coming onto this floor." Mia explained.
I was pretty sure I hated Tina.
"Let them up! I want to see them! Please." I begged.
Kamrie had no idea why I was here since there weren't any TV's in the rehab section of the hospital, but she heard I was here again and wanted to see me. And I was more than willing to see her.
Thea knew why I was here. She threatened to kill my father, and I calmly had to remind her (over the phone) that murder was both illegal and morally wrong. Aside from that, killing my father wouldn't work since he was already in jail. She responded with the fact that her cousin was in jail and had a soft spot for kids.
I was kinda looking forward to hearing what the inmates did to my big, tough father. I knew inmates didn't like child molesters, but I wasn't sure what they would do to child abusers. Would they beat him up? Would they try and kill him?
And, if they did, how would I get cookies into the prison to gift them with?
Yeah, I guess that I had lightened up since my father went away. I wasn't so afraid anymore. The only big thing that I was absolutely terrified of was of Lila and the boys not wanting me anymore. Which led to the start of this conversation.
I was ecstatic to see everyone. Sure, my heart wouldn't stop thudding with the bone-crushing thoughts that they might not want me anymore, but that didn't mean that I couldn't be excited to see them in the meanwhile.
"Alright, alright. I'll get them up here. They're at home, pouting. And don't worry, I've been texting Lila about your condition. The boys know their boundaries." Mia said reassuringly, patting my hand. That sent a thrilling chill down my spine.
"Can I talk to Kamrie and Thea before?" I asked. Mia chuckled and shook her head, gesturing towards the door. Thea was racing towards it at high speed, Kamrie following her at her heels. My jaw dropped and my eyes widened at the sight. I was positive one of them was going to smash into the door, but Mia pulled it open just in time.
"Ariel!" Both girls shouted, throwing their arms around me. The jostling may have had pain flaring up from every single limb, but I didn't care. I was just glad that they weren't treating me like I was some freak of nature.
"How are you guys?" I asked. It might have been an awkward conversation started, considering where I was laying, but it got both girls laughing. They told me stories of people in rehab and of rumors going around school before the story got out. Kamrie still had no idea what I was in for.
When Thea stepped out into the hall to call her mother, Kamrie's happy face dropped and tears welled up in her eyes.
"Mom was arrested. She's going in for five years." Kamrie cried, tears leaking out of her eyes. I hugged her as best I could, shushing her cries. I hated hearing people cry. It always made me feel so helpless.
"It'll be alright. She'll get clean this way, and when she gets out, you'll be an adult. You can help her out and then maybe start to repair your relationship." I told her soothingly. Kamrie's hiccuping sobs were the only response I got for five or six minutes. She sat up, smiling softly at the damp spots on my hospital gown.
"I don't want to bond with her, though. I hate her." Kamrie whispered sullenly, crossing her arms over her chest. I pursed my lips. I knew she didn't hate her mother. I didn't hate mine, even though my mother was a lot better than Kamrie's.
Kamrie wouldn't have sobbed like that had she not loved her mother.
"As undeserving of your love as she might be, you still love her. You don't hate her." I told her, pleading with Kamrie to hear what I was saying. If she let herself get consumed with her thoughts of hate, she would never really and truly move on from her past.
When did I become a therapist?
"You don't know anything about hate!" Kamrie shrieked, pulling at her hair.
Her words should've made me mad. Should've made me lash out and try and bite her head off. But I didn't. I didn't feel the rush of anger flowing through my veins. I didn't feel the blood rushing to my cheeks as I tried to restrain my cold words.
I just kept calm.
"My father beat the shit out of me for sixteen years, murdered my mother, and then proceeded to hold my family and I hostage. Not to mention he shot my brother. So yes, Kamrie, I understand hate better than most adults. I know what it's like to want to kill someone, to want them dead. But I know you don't hate your mother. You should hate her; no one would say you hating her is unreasonable. But you love her. You wouldn't have cried about your lost time like that if you didn't love her." I said calmly.
I was proud of the cool and calm expression and tone of voice I maintained.
I was even more proud of the flabbergasted look Kamrie sported after hearing all I had to say. Her jaw was dropped and her eyes were glazed over, like she was in shock. I waved my hand in front of her face, trying to get her to respond.
Thea stepped back into the room, putting her phone back into her back pocket. She looked up and looked at Kamrie in confusion.
"What did I miss?"