Nafessa Williams
I sat in a jail cell, surrounded by half my damn classmates. We were all mad as hell and everyone was ready to get the fuck out of here. I hadn't spoken to nobody, not even Zendaya who was sitting next to me. Toni was across the room and we would make eye contact but that's it.
"So we just spend the night here?"
Everyone's head turned to Kelly. She'd been talking our asses up every wall in America. Did I mention her and Shawn's ass was in here but there was no sign of their 'badass' leader?
The entire room groaned as Zendaya mumbled. "Bitch, we gone say it one more time. Once our parents pick us up, we're free to go. There's no records. No pictures. No fingerprints. You don't cause more problems and you go. Simple. Now shut up."
"Please and damn thank you." Ricky muttered. "I'm sick of hearing her ass."
"Shit same." Someone else added.
"Well, I'm sorry..." She replied as it got silent before she spoke again. "I'm sorry that I care about our records." Everyone smacked their lips. "I seem to be the only one here worried. My parents are strict!"
My head snapped her way as I snapped. "Shut up. You are not the only one. Everyone in here is worried and anxious. Everyone in here is probably scared as hell to face our parents. People deal with shit differently so instead of talking our damn heads off, sit there, talk to yourself in your head and mind your business. Shit."
It went silent as everyone stared at me. After a minute they began looking away. My nerves were bad. These cuffs were still hurting my wrist and quite frankly it just wasn't the damn time to be talking too damn much.
The officer came to the cell, and I knew it was to call a name but he wasn't alone this time. My mother was behind him. She pointed at Toni and Zendaya. "Them as well."
"Alright. You three. Time to go." He mumbled.
We stood and walked to the sliding door of the cell. He undid Toni's handcuffs first, then Z's and lastly mines. As we walked towards the front, my mother spoke to the officer. "Thanks for calling me Tim."
"No problem. Anytime Janila." They hugged briefly before she caught up with us.
We got into the car and she headed towards our neighborhood which was a good drive away. It was silent until she spoke. "Oh, so no one has anything to say?"
"Thanks for picking us up Mama J." Toni mumbled softly.
"You're definitely not welcome." My mom replied. "Girls, jail? Seriously?"
"It wasn't our faults—." Zendaya tried but was cut off.
"No. Nobody gets to excuse their actions right now. What happened? I expect better. If you're going to go to a protest, fine, but the law enforcement is where you draw a line. Something more serious could have happened to you girls." She continued scolding us.
Toni responded softly. "Things were going good but suddenly everything went haywire."
"And that's when you girls leave. I can't take another loss Nafessa. You know that. Make better decisions. You know that I trust you but if you continue getting into trouble with the police, I'll have to take—."
"My car." I finished for her. "Yeah. Got it."
My mom glanced at me before her tone hardened some. "Excuse me? Lose the attitude."
"No mom, because you claim you aren't strict but honestly you are. You want to know my whereabouts every thirty minutes. I'm 18! Everyone isn't dad alright? And if I did go out like him, I'd be happy because at least I went out with some damn dignity and pride and not a fucking nobo—." My words were cut short as a slap hit the left side of my face.
Instinctively, my hand cradled my face as I looked out the window in anger. It was my mom's turn to swap words with me. "Watch your damn words with me Nafessa Imani Williams! You are not grown, so don't throw your age out at me as if you can actually make adult like decisions! Cause if you could, I wouldn't be picking you up from a damn police station. I pay bills at that house, I make sure you don't want for nothing. If Nafessa wants her hair done, she gets her hair done. If she wants the latest phone, she gets the latest phone. If she doesn't like her car, we go to a lot and buy her a new one. Now I don't ask for much in return because that's my job as your mother, but you're going to respect me. Your location is the least you can do for me, because it's people your age who would kill for half the damn mother that you have."
I didn't respond but instead stared out the window. She pulled up to Daya's house who mumbled a low farewell and exited the car. When she got into the house, we pulled off. It was silent in the car, my anger raging through every part of my veins.
"Toni, are you going home?" My mother asked her softly.
Her voice called back. "Not if I don't have to. My moms going to have a lot of questions I don't have the answers to right now."
I knew she really didn't want to go home because of me but tonight was the night I needed to take my pills and go to bed. For once, I knew I needed something that was going to make me sleep.
"Okay sweetie. I'll call and let her know on my way back to work." She called back to Toni. "Are you girls hungry?"
Still being silent, Toni answered again. "Not really. Fessa, you hungry?"
I didn't respond as I stared out the window still. My mother took a breath. "Give her a few Toni. She's in her mood. Your cars at the house Nafessa, so it should be no problem for you to go get food after I drop you off. Okay?"
My eyes stayed trained outside and the mug on my face seemed to be permanent at the moment. I hated when she put her hands on me— and she rarely did it but I was still pissed.
She pulled into our driveway after a while of driving. Toni got out as my mother spoke. "Toni, Fessa will meet you in there in a second. Give us a moment please?"
"Yes ma'am." T replied as she got out the car and walked into our house.
I didn't turn to face her as she spoke. "Fessa, look I'm sorry for hitting you but you know how I am about the cops. I get anxious about them all around. Thank God I knew Tim. I worry about you constantly sweet. You know that. It's smothering to you but it's really just my constant worrying. I already work long shifts and I'm away half the day. Honestly, I already lost your dad..." She took a moment and I knew she had began crying. "And I can't lose anyone else."
It was my turn to take a deep breath and look at her. "Mom, don't cry." I reached over and wiped her tears. "I- I just feel like some days you don't let me breathe. Like you don't trust me or something. I'll be careful. I promise. You won't lose me. I'm right here. I'm sorry for what I said. It was uncalled for and disrespectful..."
I hated when I made my mother cry, and vice versa. She sighed. "I appreciate your apology. I'm sorry for doing too much with your location and things. I just have my days but you know I trust you. If I didn't, I would have switched to another profession by now."
We both chuckled as I smiled softly. "Yeah. Yeah. You're right. I'll go inside and take my pill tonight. So when you come home, I'll probably be knocked out."
"If you don't want to take them, then don't take them. Just make sure you don't put yourself in binding positions princess. That's all I ask. You know how you get when you black out. You and your father. Promise me you'll be okay."
"I promise."
"No more jails. No more cops. No more fights. Just give your momma a break for a minute Fes. Please."
"I promise mom. I'll chill." I responded.
"Good." She nodded as she reached over and kissed my forehead. "Now, go in the house. Call me if you need anything. I love you."
Getting out the car, I replied. "I love you more. Have a good night at work."
Shutting the door, I walked into the house. Toni was sitting on the bar stool. She looked exhausted but smiled softly when she saw me. "Ready to wash the jail off of us?"
"And then can we nap?" I asked because I was tired my damn self.
She chuckled and nodded quickly. "Oh yes. Of course because I am exhausted. I don't think I'll ever get used to hitting the ground and getting cut up."
"Good because it isn't the norm." I mumbled as I walked over and took her hand. "Come on, let's go shower."