My soulmates were in the living room talking. I could hear them muttering from afar. They were talking about SHIELD, Fury and me. The details, I didn't catch, but if I had to guess they'd want to move me somewhere safe. I've spent a few days thinking, trying to come back to my senses. I thought of Nitri and Lena. The messages on my phone told me that they knew nothing. I've told them about the rest of my soulmarks. I told them about this too. Texted them everything I could remember. How my parents disappeared, where I was and what I wanted to do. Alex and Aya too. Just not the details with them. I left out many details for them. Haven't looked at my phone since. Maybe I'm scared of seeing their answer, or maybe I just don't want to talk about it. Not yet. I've promised myself that I'd tell them everything. Eventually. Just not now. I have to do this on my own.
I still want to join SHIELD. My thoughts keep circling around that topic. Something needs to happen in my life. I can't just sit here forever and grieve. Nothing good will come out of it. That's why I'm walking towards the living room. I've made up my mind. I feel ready. From this day on I'll change my life for the better.
"I want to join SHIELD"
The conversation stopped instantly. Tony almost looked scared by the fact that I was up and walking. Steve quickly got to my side and offered to support me, which coincidentally matched with my legs almost collapsing under me. It would take a lot of training to get back on track, but I was determined.
"Are you sure?"
"You haven't eaten properly or gotten much fresh air"
"Let's wait a week or two.. we can't just let you join when you're like this"
"I'll change my lifestyle, but I won't change my mind«
I said. They all cared deeply for me. I liked that. If I had the mental strength, I'd smile at them. Show them my gratitude, but I just couldn't get myself to it. I knew they were right. My body is not in the place. Maybe my mentality too, but I won't stop. Soon I'll be strong enough, and I'll only get stronger. The longer I wait, the more time I'll waste both my soulmates and friends' lives. Nitri, Lena, Alex and Aya need answers, and the Avengers need to focus on other things than me all of the time.
Everything will change from this point on.
———🍀———🌸❦🌼———🍁———
None of the Avengers wanted their soulmate to join SHIELD. Not just now but ever. Steve was convinced that it was because of delusion or something to do with her isolation. Tony knew it came from the trauma. He too wanted to protect the world, because of what he had been through, but if his soulmate got hurt on the battlefield, everything he had done would feel like it had been for nothing. Bruce was silent about it. He tried not to think too hard about it, or else he'd crumble down and unleash the Hulk. Something told him that in the end, Flora would join SHIELD. It was that which crushed him the most. Natasha didn't want Flora to go through something similar as she did. Nothing that even slightly resembled. Even if it was on the side she was fighting for. Clint.. Clint wasn't actually that against it. Not that he thought it was a good idea, but if Flora really insisted, he'd help her. Teach her to fight, defend herself. She seemed to have been in a great physical condition before, and if she was determined to gain that back, he'd support her. He did feel an influenced angst from his friends. There was always that side that didn't want his soulmate hurt or in any danger.
Vision had it easier to think. He followed Flora back to her room, while the others discussed her choice.
"Have you been in contact with your friends?"
He asked to try and change the subject.
"I told them everything I saw fit. I don't wish to speak to them while I am like this.."
She looked away. Something came to her. Not just the sadness of having to hide the truth from her friends, but something else.
"I notice that something else is bothering you"
This was something that had personally bothered him, and he felt the need to ask. Even if she didn't want to answer, she at least knew that he had his concerns for her.
"If you can keep a secret, even from Tony, I'll tell you"
"I'm not sure I can do that"
"Then good night Vision. Please make sure my soulmates doesn't do anything stupid"