Christian
Dec. 19
10:07 P.M.
Yoongi; Omg I am so gay
Yoongi; his ass was so cute
Yoongi; and his body was so hot what the fuck?
Yoongi; but then his face and his little squishy cheeks were so cute
Yoongi; and I hate him so much :(
Christian; Two things:
Christian; 1) Wow, Tae was right, you are a liar and
Christian; 2) Pardon?
Yoongi; so I work at that little gas station off of 4th street, and I'm on a late shift rn because i'm broke like we established. And that fucking pink haired headass that has the bible tatooed on his asshole walked in and- :((((( he was so cute
Yoongi; and not the normal I want to pin him down and destroy him kind of cute, it was more of i wanna cuddle and watch Mulan with you cute
Yoongi; fuck me with a toothbrush
Christian; ...
Christian; Um.
Christian; Okay.
Christian; That's fun.
Christian; I don't think he would like to um you know-
Christian; "fuck you with a toothbrush" but like sure, let's just let that rest there and never touch on this subject again.
Yoongi; no. don't cuss. Not ur thing
Yoongi; I meant my life is shit i'm not being fucked or fucking anyone with any form of brush
Yoongi: also no. we will talk about this all I want because idk U irl and ik you won't say anything to anyone because you're too self righteous
Christian; It does seem highly unsanitary.
Christian; Nope i will not tell a soul.
--___---__-__--__
GAY THOTS (and Jimin)
Dec. 19
10:11 P.M.
Jiminie; Guys.
kookiemonster; *gays
kookie; *gays
kookiemonster; babe we're twinning
kookie; babe
kookie; we are on the same fucking wavelength
kookie; i love you bro, full homo
kookiemonster; I love you too bro, full homo and hetero <3
kookie; bro💕
kookiemonster; bro 💕💕
Jimine; okay would you two sHUT THE FUCK UP I AM UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
kookie; he-
kookiemonster; cussed
kookie; god is dead, ladies and homos.
kookiemonster; all rise for king jiminie
kookie; i am playing toxic as loud as i can dude
kookiemonster; ik i'm on your bed
Jiminie; oKAY SHUT UP
Jiminie; LOOK GUYS I WHAT OJADBNISBDFUYHBF
*Image Attached*
kookie; hold up is that yoongi
kookiemonster; he still doesn't know it's you?
kookiemonster; yea babe it totally fucking is im wheezing but also crying but also im so shocked I'm frozen???
kookie; i know, babe
kookie; you are sitting right next to me
Jiminie; nO HE DOESN'T KNOW ITS ME I TOLD HIM MY NAME IS CHRISTIAN SO THAT WAY HE DOESN'T KNOW ITS ME BUT LIKE HE I UM DOES HE KNOW THAT I AM STRAIGHT UM CAN ONE OF YOU LIKE TALK SOME SENSE INTO HIM PLEASE
kookiemonster; dude that seems kinda wrong? Also no- my otp is forming
kookie; haha oh hell no my ship is sailing
kookiemonster; stop saying you're straight for real for real. Me and kook are your best friends, your hair is pink, you wear skinny jeans and paint your nails. You like makeup and last time we went shopping you stared at a skirt for thirty minutes looking so fucking sad.
Jiminie; LOOk I LIKE GETTING MANICURES THEY MAKE MY NAILS LOOK HEALTHY AND I ONLY WEAR MAKEUP SOMETIMES BECAUSE I BREAK OUT AND I WEAR SKINNY JEANS BECAUSE THEY ARE STYLISH AND NORMAL JEANS LOOK AWFUL ON ME
kookiemonster; being gay isn't wrong, and as your best friend I know you are in fucking denial so drop that shit and just own the fact you are too fucking scared to be into guys, and that you find it fucking disgusting. Stop being a little pussy and just admit you find me and kook wrong and gross, because thats the only logical reason that when THIS
kookiemonster;
kookiemonster; comes a knocking at your door you lie about who you are and come bitching to us like yoongi is the one in the wrong. When in fact that is the softest i have ever seen hyung with anyone that isn't jungkook so
kookiemonster; admit you're into guys, or handle this on your own
Jiminie blocked 'kookiemonster'!
Jiminie blocked 'kookie'!
kookie; I know this probably isn't the best time since he just blocked us and all but
kookie; but babe
kookie; why do you have so many pictures of my brother?
kookiemonster; ...
kookiemonster left 'GAY THOTS (and jimin)'
kookie; wow the nerve
--___-___-__-____----
JINNIE
Dec. 19
11:46 P.M.
Jiminie; Hey, Hyung, I need to talk.
Jinnie; whats up jiminie
Jinnie; i'm a little busy but I can tell Joon date night can wait if you need me
Jiminie; Um, I kinda just blocked Kook and Tae.
Jinnie; Did Tae finally pop off about your constant state of denial and tell you to choose them or heterosexuality
Jiminie; lITERALLY WHO ARE THEY TO TRY AND FORCE ME INTO BEING SOMETHING
Jiminie; LIKE DAMN
Jiminie; THAT IS WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS
Jiminie; AND WHAT IS WORSE IS THAT THEY KNOW IM NOT GAY
Jinnie; listen Jimin you know we all love you and all want the best for you. So I won't lie to you, but I need you to listen to me without getting mad. I know Tae probably said something about you being borderline homophobic and if you immediately get pissed when I say this then he's right.
Jinnie; Jimin you aren't the straightest person out there okay...? If you really truly aren't gay then that's okay, but you need to learn that being called gay isn't some insult, especially when all the people who love you the most are gay. Yet, what I can't wrap my head around, is why you blocked both kook and tae, when kook didn't even say anything, because he never does when tae is pissed, and when tae was trying to help. You know Tae, you know how much he loves you, and you know the things he has done for you over the years, like when he came out and was so scared he said that he'd break up with JK for you if it made you uncomfortable. So, he cares so fucking much about you, therfore when he says something like that, it means he has thought out all the outcomes and he knew you'd be pissed
Jinnie; Tae loves you more than JK, and talking to you makes his day amazing, so tell me why, when he did something he knew would piss you off, all because he wants the best for you, you blocked him? Tae would never do anything just to benefit him
Jinnie; not to mention Kook would never ship u with yoongi if he knew you were straight because he would never hurt his brother that way. U just blocked your two best friends because they called you gay, seems a little homophobic, rude
Jinnie; and like your insecure in your own beliefs
Jiminie; i.. Look...
Jiminie; i'll make it up to them, okay?
Jiminie; I don't try to be homophobic, hyung, I swear, I just-
Jiminie; I don't know.
Jiminie; I don't think my sexuality is something I'm insecure about...
Jiminie; ughh i don't know
Jimine; i don't know how i would understand something like that
Jiminie; sometimes just slamming the straight label on myself seems easier than actually taking the time to try and figure myself out.
Jiminie; I am not saying either of you are right, I'm just saying I'll give it some thought.
Jinnie; It's okay not to know, it's okay to be scared, its okay to be straight, but it's not okay to not try
Jinnie; also stfu i'm always right you little shit
Jinnie; also are you Christian cause that would explain a LOT
Jiminie; yes, I am.
Jinnie; okay baby, I'm gonna get back to date night now, take some time to calm down and then unblock dumb and dumber k? I love you 😘
Jiminie; thanks, love you too
Jiminie; also, you don't tell a single soul about this conversation
Jinnie; sure babes
~
i don't like babies for the sheer fact that they do not have functioning knee-caps - tae {030420}
I just saw this authors note- now I'm crying- Zepp {032320}