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fade: chapter twenty-two
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SHE HAD NEVER EXPECTED to find rebellion hero and legendary pilot Lando Calrissian on Canto Bight of all places, but Luke told her to go there and she trusts him. Apparently, he's quite the gambler, and since retiring from piloting, he has turned to winning games all over the galaxy. The Canto Bight casino is reserved for the elite, but anyone is allowed to go inside. Playing, however, is different; only the boldest dare go up against the experienced players that win game after game.
But Florence is not here to play — she wouldn't know how to.
She seeks out the sabacc table and immediately she sees him. She knows not what he looks like, but her gut tells her it is him. He wears a large smile, cards in hand as he makes some joke to the other players around the table. Laughter fills the air for a moment before they all go quiet. Calrissian places his hand of cards down and smiles. By the looks of the other men around the table, he has won.
The day is coming to an end and the men around the table start to clear out. Florence stays in her place, leaned against a pillar, watching the old rebellion hero closely as he also finishes up. Finally, he spots her. "If you're here to play, we'll be back tomorrow."
Florence shakes her head, a soft smile on her face. "No, I'm not playing," she chuckles before sucking in a sharp breath. "I'm actually here for you."
His expression changes as he scans her appearance. "And what does a first order associate want with me?"
"I don't- I'm not... they think I'm on a mission following up some whispers of a first order spy. I'm not planning on going back." She explains quietly, taking a step towards the adjacent balcony. The doors are wide open, a gust of wind travels through the room.
Calrissian watches her, the corners of his lips curling upwards in half a smile. "Ah, and you're the spy. I appreciate the irony."
She doesn't think it's very funny. "I have an urgent message for general Organa. I don't know how to find her but I know you do." She nods towards him. She has heard tales of their adventures since she was but a young child.
He tilts his head, eyes looking at her as if asking her if she seriously thinks he can trust her, just like that. She knows he can't. "I have good intentions, I swear it." She promises, taking the final steps onto the balcony.
"I can't know that," she hears him say behind her. She already knows that.
She closes her eyes, desperate for someone to just trust her. "I know. But I swear on my life I have good reasons for doing this... I have- I've made some bad choices, but the entire galaxy is in grave danger if I do not get this message to the resistance in time."
"What reasons would that be?"
She looks out at the sky, at a ship slowly descending into space. "I have a... complicated relationship with that family," She turns around to face him. "More specifically the general's son."
His expression shifts. Not many people know who Kylo Ren truly is — if she knows, she is either someone who has insanely good connections and has attained that information somehow, or she truly does have a special connection to Ben Solo. Something tells him it is the latter. Perhaps it is the look in her eyes; confidence. Fright. Desperation. She is begging him for help.
"Who are you?" He asks her and she releases a breath of relief.
"No one particularly important," she replies, and she means it. In the grand scheme of things, she isn't. She has played a small part in all of this, this story that expands through generations and decades of war, worry, and struggle. But now she has the opportunity to change things for real, to make a true difference. "But I would love your help."
He hums, seeming to consider it for a second before he smiles at her. "Have dinner with me, will you?"
She accepts it with a nod, gracefully. "Of course."
Canto Bight is filled with plenty of restaurants, all expensive and fancy beyond belief. Florence has never quite seen anything like this. She feels ridiculously underdressed, but it matters not. She is in the company of Lando, which is all truly matters to her.
She hadn't realized how hungry she truly is until she is handed a plate of food. Lando watches her practically devour the meal in front of her. "Tell me, how do you know the general's son?"
She places down her fork, glancing up at the captain. "He, uh, he trained me. In the force. And combat, actually," she says, chasing the memories of their sessions away. Not now, she thinks. This is way too important for her to get all emotional and sad.
He raises an impressed brow. "Ah. What's your name?"
She hesitates. She recalls what Luke told her just hours ago. It seems strange to her, the entire situation. It still doesn't sit right with her. "Florence Naya. I wouldn't expect you to have heard that name before. My parents were nobody special."
"I doubt they weren't, kiddo. Long white hair as you have, force sensitive-"
"They weren't. Not that I know of. And neither of them had hair like mine," she chuckles. "I wasn't raised to learn these powers. They were nothing but bedtime stories to me." She explains, arms crossed over her chest as she reflects upon her childhood.
After a brief pause, she looks up at Lando. "Ben... he isn't rotten through and through. There is good in him, lots of it. He just needs a final push."
"I knew the boy well," He sinks back into his chair. Florence leans forward to listen. "He was always bright and curious. Reserved, sure, but comfortable around those he knew. He loved going on adventures with Han and I. So clever, too. Seemed like the perfect boy. I couldn't believe when I heard what happened."
Sucking in a breath through gritted teeth, she keeps composed. She must not let her emotions get the best of her — she trusts this man, but this is a first impression and she wouldn't want to start sobbing in the middle of this fancy restaurant. "I thought I could change him... I thought I did. He's a completely different person around me. That's the Ben you knew — he's not gone he's just... hidden, you know? Under that horrible mask, he's still Ben. Not supreme leader, not Kylo Ren, he is the son of a smuggler and a princess. And I see so much potential in him that I can't seem to reach no matter how hard I've tried."
He nods. He understands, yet he is conflicted to hear it. For as long as he can remember, Kylo Ren has been one of the biggest threats to the galaxy. The words of a lost girl won't change that, no matter how much he believes her. "What is the message you need to get to the resistance?"
She hesitates for a moment, but if there is anyone she can trust with this information, it is the man who blew up the second Death Star. "Emperor palpatine is back," she says in a hushed tone. "Before you ask, I have no idea how. But he is, and he has a giant fleet of star destroyers; the biggest the galaxy has ever seen. I'm not sure of their plans but I'm certain they will launch an attack on at the very least the resistance, if not even worse and they plan to ambush the entire galaxy. We need to act before it's too late."
Worry flashes in his eyes. The looks of disbelief on his face is understandable, but Florence needs him to believe her. "Are you certain?"
She nods confidently. She had been hesitant to believe it at first, but upon recalling all of her dreams and seeing how adamant Ben had been on it being true, there is no doubt in her that the news are true. "Yes. I am."
Lando lets out a breath, shaky but still composed. He looks at her. "I have a guy that can take you to their base. He'll be here in a few days. Until then, you are welcome to stay."
Her eyes light up, unable to hold a smile in. "Really?"
"Yes, if you will," he confirms.
"Thank you."
They walk together back through the restaurant, to where, Florence doesn't know, but she trusts it will be a place they can stay. Lando glances at her as they walk side by side. "Who sent you here, by the way? Who told you to find me?"
She keeps her eyes locked on her feet, almost scared to look up in case anyone would recognize her. In case there are cameras or, god forbid, any stationed first order troopers with orders to find her. She smiles, though, to herself. "An old friend of yours," she replies, in the most Luke Skywalker way she can.
"Luke?" He asks, a small laugh escaping his lips. She cannot quite tell if it's because he can't believe it or if he thinks he should have figured. She she nods in confirmation. "Why didn't you just say so?"
Finally, she locks eyes with him. "I should've probably lead with that, yeah."
He pats her on the shoulder. "Don't worry, all is well. I'll get you to the general."
As it turns out, Lando Calrissian owns a local hotel. She hadn't taken him for a business type of guy, but he's clearly got a lot of money he likes to invest in things. She's shown to a room, well, actually, it's a suite; several rooms with a large private balcony, just under Lando's own private floor; the top floor, of course.
The room is huge — fancier than anything she has ever had the luxury of staying in — with a wide balcony overlooking the ocean just beneath the city. The bed is large and soft, bedding the most comfortable she has ever had the pleasure of sleeping under. She will not be uncomfortable here, that is for sure. It doesn't feel homely nor does it feel like she belongs, but she's happy to feel safe.
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WAKING UP IN THAT HOTEL room doesn't seem real. Her eyes open and she spends several silent seconds trying to recall where she is until she sits up and everything comes back to her. Slowly, she slides to the edge of the bed, her bare feet colliding with the cold flooring. She retreats, knees pulled to her chest for just a few minutes. Whenever it is silent her thoughts completely spiral, but they all end up in the same place.
She's always wondering what Ben is doing, thinking, feeling. She can feel him somewhere, in her chest, his presence is always there. He's across the galaxy and yet he feels so close.
In his own private quarters on the star destroyer, Ben wakes up at the feeling of someone looking at him. Frowning, he looks around his room. It's empty, but he can feel their presence. It's not a bad presence — in fact, it feels familiar. It feels like home. There is no doubt that it is Florence, somewhere in the galaxy, thinking about him. And his heart seems a little bit more at ease knowing that she is all right and she has not completely forgotten about him.
He cannot even find it in him to be mad at her. He is angry. Just not right now.
She lets out a groan, running her hands down her face out of frustration. "Get your shit together, Florence," she whispers into her palms before pushing her hair behind her ears. Her words seem to echo in Ben's mind before they fade away, as does her presence. He is left alone. As is she, completely alone in a large hotel room that seems far too expensive for her.
Sighing loudly, she walks over to the chair she hung her clothes over and she grabs them before locking herself in the bathroom. After so many years, she has not grown tired of braiding her hair every morning. She spends extra time today, making sure it looks absolutely perfect. She's not entirely sure why. She wants to fit in here, amongst people of insane fortune. Her clothes are far from as pretty as theirs but she can at least make herself look extra presentable.
Glancing at herself in the mirror, she thinks she looks different. She can't tell what exactly has changed, but she doesn't recognize herself. Maybe she has gotten rounder, perhaps thinner. Maybe she just looks sadder, happier? She is free. She should not be sad. Perhaps she looks more a woman now that she has been emancipated.
No. It's not that.
It's her body. The sheer nightgown the hotel supplied her with doesn't cover much, really. And even she can see the difference. Firmer breast, rounder face, stomach not as flat as it once was. There is no denying it any longer. She cannot keep pushing this aside. What has been just speculations in her mind, late night worries, have become facts just now. She can not deny something she can see.
She cannot stop the tears from falling. Sucking in a breath through her teeth, she holds in a scream. But she exhales, and anger rises in her. She let this happen. "Fuck!" She slams her hands on the faucet out of anger.
After a minute or two, she calms down. And she glances up at herself again, face red and puffy. She cannot go out like this. She changes into proper clothes before fleeing onto the balcony, allowing the fresh winds calm her down. The city below is bustling with life but from her place, she can barely hear it. Ships going in and out of the planet, voices from other people enjoying their morning in the sun, she tunes it all out.
"There you are," Lando says from behind her. She turns around, trying her very hardest to look as if she wasn't just crying. Their eyes meet and he continues. "Join me for breakfast."
"I'm not very hungry," she dismisses. She would sooner stay in her room all day than go anywhere, but that may not be an option.
He barks out a laugh. "You will be when you see the buffet, trust me."
She steps off the balcony. She is hardly in a position in which she can refuse such luxuries as a breakfast buffet. She nods and they walk side by side out the room, down the hallway. Florence is still in awe at how insanely beautiful this hotel is. "You live like a king here," she smirks, eyebrows raised.
Lando lets out a belly laugh, patting his hand on her shoulder. "Only occasionally. I'm not here all that often, Florence. You were lucky to catch me."
She nods in understanding. "Where are you, then? When you're not here."
He smirks. "Around."
She is not surprised at his vague answer in the slightest. She would respond, but they reach the restaurant before she has the time to. Various meats and fruits spread out over a table stretching through half of the room. She only picks out the ones that she recognizes, too scared to try the other ones.
They sit down opposite one another by a small, round table. It's silent for a while before Florence's curiosity gets the best of her. "How long has it been since you saw the general?"
"A couple of years, maybe. It was before Han died," he notices her tense up, evading his gaze. "You were there, weren't you?" He realizes, voice low.
She clenches her fists around the cutlery as she nods. "I had my gun pointed right at him with orders to shoot if necessary... I would have done it, if he had asked it of me." Her eyes are trained on one spot as she walks, a vase on a table on the other side of the room.
"He asked you to?"
She nods. "There are moments where he is darkness itself. Then, there are times when he is good. Kind, gentle, loving," she closes her eyes to chase away tears stinging in the corners of her eyes. I must not cry. "He offered me the world but I couldn't stay. I need to warn the resistance if it is the last thing I do."
The twisted truth is that she feels so utterly terrible for leaving. Not a second passes in which she doesn't think about how guilty she feels. He wanted her. He needed her, even. And she left him. She told him she loved him, and while that hasn't changed, she had no choice but to leave after finding out about the emperor. She has stood by for too long.
Not anymore.
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[ words 2850 ]
I completely forgot to update
last week??? I was 100% sure I
already did but apparently not!
Oh well, I'll get two updates
out this week<3