(A/N: stan exo cowards^)
spice bois
jimonchérie: GUYS I DID IT?!
dumbkook: only now? 👀
jimonchérie: what
peppermintae: what
jimonchérie: tae ew
peppermintae: you didn't deny it ;)
jimonchérie: tae shut your virgin ass
peppermintae: stop exposing me you lil shit 😤
jimonchérie: try me💅
meep: what did you do jiminie?
peppermintae: j i m i n i e
jintleman: u w u
jimonchérie: i hate y'all srsly
jimonchérie: whatever
jimonchérie: I, LADIES AND GENTS, I MANAGED TO ORDER SUMN IN A RESTAURANT WITHOUT SAYING 'UH'
jimonchérie: y'all can't do it like me 😌
hobihobo: that's-
hobihobo: inspiring.
jintleman: how in hell did you do that
jimonchérie: that's a secret i'll never tell
famjoon: not trying to flex or sth but like i've been doing that eversince ice age
peppermintae: which part?
famjoon: huh?
peppermintae: which one of the movies?
meep: dear god
jintleman: tae sweetie
peppermintae: ???
peppermintae: oh
peppermintae: OH
dumbkook: don't attack him guys, the ice age movies are pretty old so he could have meant that since the movies came out too!
peppermintae: oh no, i just forgot this shit actually existed
peppermintae: I MEAN
peppermintae: YEAH KOO, TOTALLY WHAT YOU SAID!
big dicks and yoongi
dumbkook: k o o <3
freshhobster: why did you write that?
dumbkook: who r u
freshhobster: it's confidential
meep: how'd u get in this groupchat
freshhobster: top secret
famjoon: hoseok?
freshhobster: argh darn it
dumbkook: HOSEOK!? HOW!?
freshhobster: got 'em ways kiddo 👸
meep: he was in this groupchat with his second number as well
freshhobste : i see ur a smarty smarty am i right? just as i expected
meep: jfc
freshhobste : now tell me my dear jeon jeongguk
famjoon: he used the real name-
dumbkook: oh shet
freshhobster: i can smell 🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟 and it's bothering me
freshhobster: and i'm not dumb, so you can't pull all that 'oh hoseok ur just traumatized bc of hans'-shit i mean YES, YES I AM but that doesn't change tje fact that u r behaving differently
freshhobster: and i don't like secrets that way >:(
meep: you were the one keeping ur identity a secret a few minutes ago
freshhobster: shush
freshhobster: NO WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE
freshhobster: I'M PUTTING TOGETHER SOME SHIT RN
freshhobster: I KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON
freshhobster: I'VE CONNECTED THE DOTS
meep: you didn't connect shit
freshhobster: I'VE CONNECTED THEM
freshhobster : YOU BASTARDS
dumbkook: oh no
freshhobster: WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU WERE SIGNING UP FOR THE DRAMA CLUB FUCKERS
meep: drama club?
freshhobster: OH DON'T ACT LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT
famjoon: yeah yoongz he caught us already sadly
famjoon: yes, hoseok, yes we did join the drama club
dumbkook: >:)
freshhobster: fucking knew it
freshhobster: what an aca-disappointment (pitch perfect joke intended indeed)
meep: we are sorry hoseok, we actually planned on surprising you when we would have our first performance
dumbkook: guess we can throw that idea in the trash now :/
freshhobster: oh please!
freshhobster: i'm forgiving you if you convince me with your acting skills, honey buns
freshhobster: so you better prepare yourselves well
famjoon: ah shit
pussycatdolls
jintleman has added hobihobo to the groupchat
jimonchérie: seok we need ur help
jintleman: i thought we needed hobi's?
jimonchérie: yeah, that's what i said
jintleman: no u said seok
jimonchérie : yeah h o s e o k
jintleman: oh i thought you meant
s e o k j i n
jimonchérie: no u dumb bitch this ain't about you
jintleman: well it still includes me because i'm part of the groupchat fucker
peppermintae: jfc
hobihobo: u guys need my help?
peppermintae: god himself has arrived 🙏
hobihobo: yeah bromies! btw i just woke up with a huge knot in my shirt and idk how it happened
hobihobo: what can i say
hobihobo: some be nuttin' in sleep, but i be knottin' in sleep 😎
jimonchérie: that's actually very impressive ngl
peppermintae: bro siiiiick maybe you have some powers that allow you to do things in your sleep
jintleman: ew that sentence sounded so hetero
jimonchérie: the kinky hetero kind
peppermintae: god wash away my sins ⚰😇🛀
jintleman: splash 💦
hobihobo: anyway, what did you guys need help for?
jintleman: OH RIGHT
jimonchérie: so we were wondering if you maybeeeeeee
peppermintae: m a y b e
jintleman: may⚘ bee 🐝
hobihobo: uwu
hobihobo: yeah???
jintleman: maybehelpusoutgettingclosertonamjoon,yoongiandjungkookbecausewemayormaynotallhavecrushesonthem
hobihobo: i can't quite read that wait, let me shove my bangs aside and get my glasses
hobihobo: it could take a while tho
hobihobo : 🕛🕧🕐🕜🕑🕝🕒🕞🕓🕟🕔🕠🕕🕡🕖🕢🕗🕣🕘🕤🕙🕥🕚🕦🕛🕧🕐🕜🕑🕝🕒🕞🕓🕟🕔🕠🕕🕡🕖🕢🕗🕣🕘🕤🕙🕥🕚🕦
hobihobo: ⌚⏰⏱⏲⌚⏰⏱⏲⌚⏰⏱⏲⌚⏰⏱⏲⌚⏰⏱⏲⌚⏰⏱⏲⌚⏰⏱⏲⌚⏰⏱⏲
hobihobo: ⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛⏳⌛
peppermintae: lol me^^^^
hobihobo: ohh? body goals ;)
jimonchérie: HOBI JUST READ IT ALREADY
hobihobo: sir yes sir
hobihobo: ....
hobihobo: YOU WHAT
peppermintae: cleary what the jin said
jimonchérie: 'the' jin i'm wheezing
jintleman: you don't have to mention the 'the', u say jin everybody knows who it's about there's only one jin 👸
jimonchérie: you need an extra seat for that attitude
peppermintae: 💀
jintleman: BITCH-
hobihobo: guys i am about to lose it
hobihobo: AM I GONNA DIE TODAY
hobihobo: I THINK SO MY DUDES, I THINK SO
peppermintae: waddup
hobihobo: FIRST I FOUND OUT MY OTHER THREE PALS HAVE JOINED THE DRAMA CLUB AND NOW THE PALS I AM TEXTING WITH ATM HAVE A CRUSH ON THE PALS WHOMST I HAVE JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT JOINING THE DRAMA CLUB
big dicks and yoongi
dumbkook has removed freshhobster from the chat
meep: it's for the better
pusscatdolls
hobihobo: AND NOW I'M BEING YET AGAIN REMOVED OUT OF A GROUPCHAT I CREATED BY A LITERAL ASS EATER THAT CAN'T EVEN TIE HIS SHOES
hobihobo: LIFE COULDN'T GET ANY BETTER
jintleman: wait they joined the drama club
hobihobo: yeah, do you have any other problems too?
jimonchérie: don't be fucking rude 👹💅👜
hobihobo: THE HECK-
peppermintae: are u mad :(
hobihobo: ugh
hobihobo: no
hobihobo: it's just that, i knew sth like this would happen
jintleman: the drama club??
hobihobo: no that all of you would end up falling in love
hobihobo: and i'd be alone
peppermintae: nawww hobiiiiii :(
jimonchérie: you know we would always love you no matter what :(
jintleman: yeah and we don't even know if this whole thing is gonna work out :(
hobihobo: these mf's they don't deserve rights
hobihobo: i'm actually more pissed about the acting classes tbfh lmao
hobihobo: NONETHELESS I'LL HELP YOU
peppermintae: WHAT REALLY
peppermintae: WE
jimonchérie: LOVE
jintleman: INEVITABLE DEATH
jimonchérie: bro
jintleman: oops my bad
jintleman: HOSEOK 💘💖💕❤💓💗💙🖤🧡💚💜💜💘💘💓💛💝❣💞💟🖤💗💜💋💌💌
hobihobo: 😌
jimonchérie: how r u gonna helo us
jimonchérie: help***
peppermintae: 👼👼👼👼👼👼💫💫💫💫
peppermintae: heloooOOOOooOOO
jimonchérie: i hat u
jimonchérie: hate***
jintleman: 👺🎩🎩🎩🎩
peppermintae: i hat u 😡🎩, i lov u😍💦, i hat that😡🎩👺 i lov u 🏃♂️👤💔 don't want to 🙅♀️🚫, but i can't put 📍 nobody else above you 😔📈❌🔝
jintleman: i think yoongi could do that job pretty well
jimonchérie: 🗿⚰
hobihobo: ehem?
jintleman: oh right
jintleman: how are you gonna helP us with them?
hobihobo: so
hobihobo: 🕵️♀️
hobihobo: u guys are gonna join the drama club as well ;)
jimonchérie: what why
jintleman: WHY THE HELL NOT GÉRAMONT OR WHATEVER UR CALLED
peppermintae: YEAH YOU UNBELIEVABLY TASTY FRENCH CHEESE THAT NO FRENCH PEOPLE KNOW, WHY THE FUCK NOT
hobihobo: 😓🧀🍾🇨🇦
jimonchérie: that's canada-
jintleman: it doesn't matter >:(
peppermintae: i've always thought '>:(' looked like this one villian in mario bros
hobihobo: ...
peppermintae: ...
hobihobo: but pls jimin can we pls join the drama club
jintleman: wait 'we'??
jintleman: are you going too?
hobihobo: hell yeah?! i get to act dramatically?! i get to see drama?! i get to see real life drama!? yes!?
hobihobo: but that can only work if jimin's with us
jimonchérie: u g h
jimonchérie: fine
jintleman: YAY
hobihobo: THANK YOU
jimonchérie: i butter not regret this guys
jimonchérie: better***
jintleman: oh no-
peppermintae: cause i know 🧠👈 i can treat you butter 🤧💁♂️🐄🥛 than he can 😶 and any gorl like you😗🙆♀️ deserves a gentleman 👨💼👨💼👨💼👨💼👨💼👨💼👨💼👨💼👨💼👨💼
peppermintae: mad that there isn't a butter emoji day 23562: can't believe we're still living, if anyone from the future sees this, tell me, is there a butter emoji yet?
peppermintae: AS IF THERE IS AN EMOJI LIKE THIS ONE 😂 BUT NO BUTTER EMOJI WHATTHEFUCK
peppermintae: DISAPPOINTED
__________________
(A/N: i was so panicked bc i couldn't find this chapter at first whoops
ah well
whatever)