"I feel like I'm missing pieces of sleep, a memory fades to a pale landscape..."
I frown deeply, swiping my brow in the suns, tightening the last socket on the longus finch I'm working on. Mum is watching over my shoulder and I don't look at her, not yet. I want to make sure I've done this right before I turn around. Giving it a last look over, I worry my bottom lip but I know I've done it right, I'm damn sure of it and when I turn around she is smiling widely at me, her bright green eyes full of pride.
"Turn it on," She nods to the switch and hesitating for only a second, i quickly flick it up. The generator putters before finally roaring to life, sweet smelling steam coming from its exhaust.
"You got it Rosie!" I can't stop the grin on my face as she pulls me close, hugging me tightly. Over her shoulder, I spot a boy, barely older than my own 17 years, awkward and gangly, dark hair flicking behind his ears as he grins at me throwing a wave. He's tall, towering over me these days easily a foot on my 5"2 stature but he's all legs and arms, no grace yet. Not that he ever will, the clumsy oaf.
"Ben's here, is it ok if I go?" I ask, smiling widely, my eyes flicking to him again as he waits patiently, rocking on his heels. Mum looks behind her before rolling her eyes, smiling. She knows Ben Solo as well as I do, his mum and my mum have been friends since they bought the cottage on the edge of the village. We met when Ben was a toddler and had to be brought up to the hospital after he fell on his nose. It wasn't unusual for me to be there while mum worked and that day was no different. Ben and I got on like a house on fire it was all very cute according to mum and Leia and we've been thrown together every summer since then.
"Just a moment. The importance of this lesson is?"
"If I want to help people, I have to make sure that myself, my instruments and the things that power the instruments are in working order," I say in a practise way that makes her smile, kissing my head.
"Good. You be careful and be before nightfall and you tell that Ben he needs to shave that awful bum fluff off his face," She frowns shaking her head in a motherly way and I laugh.
"Then I'd have less things to make fun of him for," I grin and she laughs. I kiss her cheek before heading over to Ben who greets me with a wonderful smile that shows all his teeth.
"Usual place?"
"Last one there has to eat a rotten egg," I pull a face as he laughs freely, kicking up dirt as he takes off sprinting.
"Ben! This is bullshit your legs are about 10 of mine!" I call, pumping my legs hard and I hear his answering laugh, making me huff and push myself harder as we leave the outskirts of the village behind, running through the dirt track of golden fields towards a small copse of trees overlooking a vast crater.
He gets there just before I do, smiling that stupid smile and leaning against our tree. I scowl, panting hard as he tries to look all cool, breathing heavily through his teeth.
"You're not funny," I say and he just smirks, shrugging.
"I thought it was pretty funny," He says and I give him a playful shove, making him chuckle.
"Don't worry Rosie, I'm sure there's still time for you to grow," His voice breaks as he tries not to laugh and I roll my eyes at him, raising a brow.
"When are you gonna get some new material? I've been the same height since I was 12,"
"Don't I know it," He grins and I shove him again, making him laugh harder. I roll my eyes.
"You're such an ass,"
"One of these days those green peepers are gonna roll out your head,"
"You can be the one to dust them off for me since its only you I roll my eyes at,"
"I'm not touching your slimey eyeballs," He scoffs and I choke a gasp, putting a hand on my chest.
"Thanks Ben!" I say sardonically and we laugh, his soft yet triumphant. He steps a little closer, towering over me and I bite my lip, those dark eyes framed by lashes that cause hurricanes looking into my own sub-par over exercised green eyes.
"Last one up the tree is a rotten egg!" I launch myself up the tree, scrambling as I laugh at his face of indignation.
"Real mature Rosie!"
"Like it was any different from when you did it," I laugh in reply, climbing quickly. This is the one thing I am better at than him, my size makes it much easier to grab more fragile branches and not to toot my own horn but I'm fast. I'm lighter than Ben and I have a better instinct for branches that will and won't break although this tree is reliable, its been here for forever.
Reaching the long branch that curls out, perfectly horizontal, I stand up, walking briskly along it. Its about 2 feet across and perfect for sitting on, Ben and I have been coming here for as long as we've been climbing trees.
"Rosie what the hell!" We both know I'm showing off now, but he did it on the way here and after all he's almost here, he's pulling himself on our bench branch, him and his stupid long legs, he can be such a worry - my stomach drops as my foot twists and I start to tip to the side. My eyes widen in horror, locking gazes with Ben as I fall back.
"Ben!" I manage to scream and I close my eyes, ready for the fall. I jolt, mid air and I realize I'm not falling, I'm locked in place in the air. Opening my eyes, I see Ben, his hand outstretched to me as he climbs, sweat trickling down his forehead until he reaches me and pulls me back on my feet, into his chest, where I bury myself for a moment, my heart bursting out of my chest.
"Are you crazy! What the hell were you thinking?!" He shouts at me , holding me at arms length and all I can do is look up at him, clutching his forearms.
"Y-you saved me," I say and a blush burns in his cheeks, him looking away.
"Yeah well, I'd get the blame if you fell, and they'd make me clean up the Rosaline pizza on the floor," I hit him lightly, shocked into a laugh, us letting each other go.
"I would still be a damn fine pizza though," I mutter and he laughs, shaking his head. I sit down gingerly, my own mortality very much on the forefront of my mind, Ben following suit. Holy cow. I almost died. I-That was the most stupid thing I've ever done. I look at my hands, covered in oil and grease. My mum would be devastated, I would never see her again, I would never become her apprentice, live my dream healing people. I feel sick, the craters smell usually a comforting thing, the thousands and thousands of roses and other flowers. It can be intoxicating, the garden of remembrance, something to behold especially from up high. It was planted after the fall of the Empire. I wouldn't remember, i was just a baby.
"Hey," I look up at Bens soft voice. Those dark eyes are looking at me, full of concern, making me swallow hard.
"Was that... Was that the Force?" I ask, my voice barely a whisper and he sucks in a breath, before nodding.
"Thank you," I say and he nods, looking away. He doesn't like to talk about the Force much, couldn't shut him up when we were kids but now he's got to start being responsible with it and lectured all the time to get it under control, he's all but mute and never uses it. I can't say I blame him, I know how it feels to be lectured within an inch of your life, mine is on my hands safety, if I break them, damage them in any way, it could ruin my ability to help people and mum never lets me forget.
"I still got here first," He barks a laugh, looking at me incredulously.
"Only you could have a near death experience and say something like that," He smirks and I shrug smiling as I looking out over the crater, the smell intoxicating at this time of year. At night it rains and rains, during the day it gets so hot the air is a humid mess of soil and roses. Hayfever sufferers nightmare.
"My uncle Luke came over last night," Ben says softly, looking ahead and I pout.
"And I missed him? Ugh, we didn't even get to throw fruit at him," I grin at Ben, but hes staring into the crater his gaze distant. When we were kids, we used to test his uncle all the time, throwing things at him to see if we could catch him off guard. Never could.
"I'm going to his Jedi academy after the summer," He glances at me from the corner of his eye. I stall but only for a second. I'm ecstatic for him, it's something that he's always wanted, but I wonder if it means he won't come home for the summer any more. And if it means I'll lose my friend.
"Ben that's great! You're already a natural with the Force, as proven like 2 minutes ago," I grin but he only forces a smile. I scoot closer to him, our shoulders brushing as we both look out onto the crater.
"What's on your mind frog legs?"
"Nothing, I just... There's a lot to live up to, I guess," He murmurs and I nod. Normally my little insults illicit a laugh or a worse one back but he's obviously really worried about this.
"I get that but you can only be Ben Solo. You're not your parents. You're going to great because you're great,"
"You think so?"
"I know so. You're Ben frigging Solo, and while I don't want inflate your already fat head, you got the makings of greatness kid," I wink at him and he laughs, giving me a small nudge with his shoulder, smiling shyly but cheered none the less.
"I start my apprenticeship this year too,"
"Under your mother?"
"Yes, though I'll be shadowing other doctors too," I say thoughtfully, my stomach knotting in anxious excitement as we fall silent. I absolutely love what I do and I'm excited to be moving onto the next part of my healers journey but that doesn't stop me worrying.
"Do you remember when we found that Loth cat, at the side of the road? It had been hit by a glider or something and you refused to leave it behind? This thing was bleeding out all over the place, hissing and spitting, part of its ear was missing and you just scolded it, wrapped it up and carried it home. Your mother said you had to save it yourself,"
"Javee," I smile, thinking back to the vicious ball of sass. That thing was more trouble that it was worth.
"You nursed him back to health on your own, pouring over your mothers medical books, making sure you did everything right," Ben smiles at me as I look down, smiling.
"You were born to fix stuff Rosie, you've been obsessed since we were kids, BB units, animals, people, if it was hurt or broken you had to fix it. You don't have anything to worry about," I swallow back a lump in my throat, resting my head on his shoulder.
"Thanks Ben,"
* * * * * * *