A/N: Nothing about this story is virtuous. It is SMUT. Ok? Just smut. Watered down a bit because I'm not sure how much detail my brain can handle, but it's still smut.
Read this in Spanish!'PECADO' translation by @LoveisTwiceSee my 'Translations' reading list :)
"I'll kill myself if you don't go out with me." Hirai Momo's voice trembled as she stood on the edge of the second-floor balcony of the creative arts block. There is a railing that keeps her from jumping without climbing over, but the way her hands are positioned makes it entirely a possibility. There was a crowd of students below, forming a semicircle around the piece of ground directly underneath where Momo was standing. Everyone was staring at the man that stood in front of her.
"Don't... don't be stupid, Momo-ssi." His voice was equally as shaky. "We can t-talk about this later. Somewhere else." The man's name was Kim Heechul. A senior medical student. The whole university knew of Momo's obsession with him. But then again, she had a different 'obsession' every other week. This was nothing new.
"I'll do it. I will." Momo pulled herself up, so she was seated on the railing, her legs dangling down like strings blowing in the breeze. "I'll jump."
There were gasps in the crowd below as Momo inched herself forward slightly.
"Momo-ssi..." Heechul moved forward slightly. "We should... really talk somewhere else. You'll get hurt." His expression was pained. This had happened so many times before. So many different people. "You should be asking for help if you feel like this. I know some people who –"
"The only thing that will cure me of these thoughts is for you to love me back." Momo interrupted. She seemed to be only just balancing on that railing. It was only a matter of seconds before...
"OKAY! OKAY! I'LL GO OUT WITH YOU!" It all happened so quickly that the majority of the crowd missed it. A blink and then they were looking up to see Kim Heechul's hands wrapped around Hirai Momo's middle, her body limply hanging from his grip. They all knew she had pushed herself off. There was a grin plastered on her face, her cheeks rosy and her eyes half lidded.
Nobody knew why Momo was like this. She was a dance major going after boys and girls just to have sex and then dump them. A few puny dates and a fuck and she was moving on. Some people respected her in some sick sort of way.
It takes a lot of skill to pull off a stunt like that and still get the girl.
Hirai Momo always gets what she wants. Guess I might try killing myself... maybe that will work?
She is living the bisexual, sex addict life to the fullest.
But most just thought she was stupid. Dahyun was no exception to this majority. She thought Momo was stupid in more ways than one.
"Is she actually suicidal? Or..." Jihyo asked Dahyun as they walked side by side, past the dissipating crowd and toward the door of the music room.
"I think she just likes the attention." Dahyun wanted to end that sentence with a bad word but restrained herself. She guessed she would have to go to confession after practice was over.
"That much? Enough to die?" Jihyo held the glass door open, allowing Dahyun to step in first. She was quickly seated at the keyboard, pulling out the sheet music she was still yet to memorise.
"I don't think she would ever take the step off that edge without being certain that someone would catch her." Dahyun started her scales, warming up her fingers. "She really needs some prayers her way."
Jihyo rolled her eyes as she dumped her tote bag beside Dahyun's keyboard and leaned against the wall.
"Stop trying to enforce your religion into ever single... conversation." Jihyo stopped herself from using the word 'fucking' because if Dahyun heard her say it, she would never hear the end of it. Dahyun was... difficult to be friends with sometimes.
"Prayer is nice." Dahyun replied, finishing her last grand pattern scale with a keyboard smash when she missed the last note. "It helps me calm down and concentrate." She took a deep breath and restarted the last scale, going a little slower this time. "You should try it sometime."
"I never want to be forced to go to mass ever again." Jihyo laughed. "I almost fell asleep, and I feel like that's highly disrespectful."
Dahyun just hummed in response. The scale went well this time around. She made a mental note to go over it several times at home to work out her learned mistakes.
"Well, anyway, I'm going to pray for her today. Maybe it will help her, maybe it won't, but I'm going to give it a go."
"You are going to become a nun at this rate, Dahyun. Please don't." Jihyo grimaced, pulling a book of vocal exercises from her bag and opening it to a well-worn page about mid-way through.
Dahyun just giggled in response, allowing Jihyo to start her exercises while she looked over her sheet music and allowed her mind to wander while they waited for their other bandmates.
Hirai Momo was all she could think about after that... incident. At least she was going for a straight relationship this time around. Dahyun winced at her own thoughts, glancing around the room and at Jihyo as if to check she wasn't listening in telepathically.
Everyone had always told her she was much too conservative with her views on love and sexuality, so she tried her best to keep her mouth shut and her mind off such topics. Really, she just couldn't believe how... relaxed views of the majority had become. Though, of course she didn't say anything about that out loud. She would be beaten up. Physically by Jeongyeon who was in a loving lesbian relationship with Chaeyoung, and verbally by Jihyo who would also probably burst her eardrums with her intensely loud voice.
Dahyun just made sure to keep her mouth shut and act like nothing was wrong when they met up with Jeong and Chaeng at lunch. She had to admit, they were very cute with each other, but it just wasn't right... to see two girls together... like that. It made her skin crawl.
Dahyun hadn't realised that Jihyo had finished her exercises.
"What are you thinking about?" She asked, looking to the door, waiting for the rest of the members to show up.
Dahyun sighed.
"Nothing."
***
"Holy shit." Chaeyoung whispered, her eyes focusing somewhere off to the right-hand side of their lunch table.
"Language." Was Dahyun's automatic response, causing Jeongyeon to groan. Like usual, Chaeyoung ignored her and jutted her chin out to the side.
"She's dumping him."
Dahyun frowned and turned in the direction of interest. Momo was standing there, her arms filled with books, her hair tied back in a messy ponytail and her legs adorned with the shortest shorts that Dahyun had ever seen... well, they were much too short for her own moral code. In front of her stood Heechul, the man who had saved her from jumping off the roof one week ago. He looked half relieved, half disappointed, his shoulders slouched and his eyes questioning.
"What has it been... a week?" Jeongyeon's eyes were also fixed on the pair as they continued their intense conversation. "Hirai is like a drama television show. We should vlog her life."
"That's just creepy." Jihyo muttered. She had lost interest and returned her attention to her food.
"Nah I agree. I would pay to watch her fucked-up love life." Chaeyoung spoke.
"LANGUAGE!" Dahyun tried again. Failed again. Nobody ever listens to the church girl.
Heechul nodded sadly in Momo's general direction as he turned away and trudged off to the Medicine block. Her face was solemn, but Dahyun wondered what she was really feeling as she let Heechul go.
"It will be only a matter of seconds before she chooses her next victim." Chaeyoung spoke as if she were a David Attenborough voicing a rare animal documentary.
Jeongyeon and even Jihyo laughed at the stupid joke, while Dahyun just shook her head. She put the last spoonful of her food into her mouth and pilled all her rubbish into a plastic bag. The laughter died down all of a sudden, as Dahyun pulled her backpack onto her shoulder and stood from the table to place her rubbish into the bin and make her way over to the chapel for her afternoon prayers before class started.
"Hi!" An unfamiliar voice called from behind her. "You're Kim Dahyun, right?" Dahyun turned, slightly annoyed that her prayer time was being shaven off with every second she had to talk to this mystery person, but her face slackened when she saw who it was.
"Uh... yeah. Yes." She stuttered, looking into the eyes of Hirai Momo was intense. She was smiling. It was one with all her teeth showing and her eyes disappearing and her cheeks just beaming. It was almost very easy to forget that she had just dumped some guy rather heartlessly. She looked like the friendliest, most lovable human on earth right now.
"I just wanted to tell you that you're really pretty. I hope we can get to know each other better!" She bowed, but never lost eye contact.
"Ok?" Dahyun didn't know how to respond as Momo moved past her, leaving with a wink that left her cheeks a deep shade of red.
There was a long, uncomfortable silence as Dahyun and all her friends watched as Momo walked away, her raven hair swaying slightly along with the movement of her hips.
"So," Jihyo was the first to break the quiet, causing all eyes to look at her. She, however, was only looking at Dahyun. "What are you going to do?" She sniggered slightly. "Let her die?"
"Hold up." Dahyun raised her hands to stop Jihyo from speaking, then realising that she was still holding a bag full of rubbish, lowered them again. "What do you mean I'm gonna let her die?"
"Dahyun... of all people... the church girl." Jeongyeon spoke slowly, her eyes trailing along Dahyun's body teasingly. It made her squirm. She hated that sort of attention.
"What does that mean?" Dahyun folded her arms over her chest. Her voice was small because she knew. She knew exactly what that meant.
"So, are we gonna get to see some girl on girl action from our fellow nun?" Chaeyoung smirked and nudged her girlfriend with her shoulder when she didn't laugh.
Dahyun knew it wasn't at all ethical, in a religious nor the non-religious perspective to let someone commit suicide. That was a sin. She just had to hope that Momo wouldn't resort to that.
"No." Dahyun shook her head vigorously. "I'm not going to sin like that."
"Hey." Jeongyeon's joking mood darkened immediately with Dahyun's words. Chaeyoung gave up trying to force her to laugh at her joke and gripped her arm tightly to stop her from lunging at Dahyun.
"Wh-what I mean is..." Dahyun had to save herself a black eye and a broken friendship. So, she improvised. "I won't let her sin. Committing suicide. That's a sin. I won't let her do that." It was lame, but Jeongyeon calmed down, letting her off this time.
"Maybe we can just be friends. Maybe that's all she wants."
"Yeah, Dubu, that ain't gonna happen with Momo." Jihyo patted her shoulder a little too hard to reprimand her for the almost blunder. "It's all or nothing with her. You've seen it yourself."
Dahyun though for a moment.
"I guess you're right." She sighed. "I'll just have to keep up the prayers.
Everyone whined and groaned at that.
"What? Prayer is powerful. Don't underestimate it." And with that, she turned to finally make her way to the chapel for some well-earned alone time with God. She needed it.
It turned out that Dahyun... overestimated the power of her prayers.
***
"Hi, Dahyun-ah." Momo poked her head through the glass door of the practice room. Her hair was down today, the long locks flowing over her shoulders almost perfectly. Dahyun wished she had hair that nice.
"Good morning Hirai-ssi." Dahyun stood from her seat at the keyboard to bow slightly, then returned to her music. If she just acted like this was a normal occurrence, maybe Momo wouldn't try anything.
"I've always wanted to date a girl who played piano." Momo sighed, stepping through the door to approach Dahyun. That was... direct. Dahyun cleared her throat and tried to ignore the blush seeping into her cheeks at the comment.
"Oh?" She continued ghosting the chords, occasionally scribbling a note on the music. She pretended to be relaxed. "I don't think playing the piano should be the defining feature of what you are looking for in someone."
Momo was very close now, leaning over the keyboard to peer at the music. Of course, this was a guise to allow Dahyun a very... unpleasant view of her... chest area. She ignored it.
"Well, what do you think I should look for?" Momo's tone was suggestive and sensual.
Dahyun felt like poking her buttons, so she bluntly replied:
"A male for one." Momo's expression changed slightly. Her eyes darkened and her brows furrowed. "For two, someone who will work with you to bring you closer to heaven."
Dahyun played the 'God' card. Unfortunately, it always seemed to push people away from her, so this seemed like the perfect time to preach. Introducing God to someone who needs it and getting rid of a potential weirdo who wanted nothing from her but... Dahyun did the sign of the cross in her mind.
"You're gonna make this difficult for me. Aren't you, Dahyunie?" Momo said after a small silence as she processed Dahyun's strange reply to her question.
Dahyun saw Jihyo and Chaeyoung behind Momo's shoulder about to walk in. They stopped when the realised Momo was in there with her. Their expressions were worried. Well, Jihyo's expression was worried. Both Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung had identical smirks on their face. Chaeyoung was about to lift her phone up to record when Jihyo grabbed her arm.
"What am I making difficult?" Dahyun played innocent and stupid.
But Momo wasn't stupid. Nor was she innocent. She leaned forward, pressing her lips close to Dahyun's ear. She tensed up as Momo's fingers threaded through her blonde hair. Twirling a strand close to the base of her skull. It made her scalp feel tingly.
"You know exactly what I want from you." Her tone was low. Threatening. Dahyun had never heard a voice like it before. "You might think you're all good and holy now, but you won't be once I'm through with you." She left a soft peck, just below Dahyun's earlobe. Dahyun refused to move. "I'll make you sin for me." The whisper of air from her mouth formed the words. They seemed to lace around Dahyun's neck. She couldn't breathe.
Momo backed away, her expression remaining neutral as she strode out of the music room, brushing past Dahyun's stunned and bemused friends.
The silence as the girls walked into the room was deafening. Dahyun lifted a hand to touch the place where Momo had kissed her. She felt violated. Disgusted. Repulsed. The spot burned. Her mouth was hanging open in shock.
"A fly might fly into your mouth if you don't close it." Chaeyoung broke the silence with an unnecessarily awkward comment. Jeongyeon sniggered, kissing her girlfriend on the cheek before leaving in the same direction as Momo.
"Keep it in your pants Dahyun-ah!" She remarked as she left.
"You ok?" Jihyo asked Dahyun, but Dahyun's eyes were still on the receding figure of Momo as she walked further and further away.
"I'm going to the chapel. I'll be back." Dahyun muttered. She needed time to think. She needed to get away from everyone to process everything.
"No, you're not." Chaeyoung grasped her arm firmly. "We're practicing. You can go after practice."
Dahyun spent the entire practice with her mind floating elsewhere, unsure of how to approach the Momo situation. She didn't even know the girl except for her... sexual tendencies. Maybe if she got to know Momo as a person, she would be able to figure out her motives... and maybe make a good friend. She couldn't be all that bad. Right? Prayer will solve anything if you believe.
So Dahyun continued to pray.
With no result.
***
Dahyun never got the chance to get to know Momo personally. Momo didn't allow her to.
"Dahyunie!" The voice was familiar and loud inside the library. Dahyun winced as she looked over her shoulder to see Momo walking toward her with that grin of hers stretched across her face. She made a point of sitting in the cubical directly next to Dahyun's even though there were several empty seats.
"Hello, Hirai-ssi." Dahyun said to be polite, but she kept her head down, revising the theory for a new piece she was learning.
Momo had been seeking her out in every way possible for the past two days. Following her into the library (now was one of those times), waiting to talk to her after music practice, trying to separate her from her friends at lunch... Dahyun had even run into her by accident in the bathrooms. That sure was awkward.
"What are you reading?" Momo's voice had a cute lilt to it, though Dahyun would never admit it. In her mind it was annoying.
"My music theory." Maybe this was a chance to bring up some sort of mundane subject to get to know Momo better. Dahyun had tried and failed countless times over the past two days. Maybe today was the day? Dahyun was just about to ask, when Momo's hand found its way to her knee.
Dahyun tensed as Momo's fingers moved higher and higher. Lightly grazing her skin, causing the knee-length skirt she was wearing to bunch up.
"You're paying so much attention to that book." Momo's voice... her voice... Dahyun's cheeks burned as her hand played with the hem of her skirt. "It's making me jealous." This was the first time Momo had been so bold. Touching her. She hadn't touched her before. Dahyun moved her leg slightly in an attempt to move Momo off, but it didn't work. She didn't like this.
"It's silly to be jealous of a book." Dahyun managed to whisper as the hand finally slipped up her skirt to caress her inner thigh. She looked around to see if anyone was watching. They weren't.
"Please don't touch me like that." Dahyun breathed, unable to explain the sensation that was building up in between her legs. Her mind was screaming for Momo to move her hand just a little higher. Just enough... to...
"Why not?" Momo's breath reached her ear. Her fingers were between her legs, soft and gentle. Resting against Dahyun's underwear. Dahyun shuddered at the sensation, her heart beating in a rhythm she wasn't familiar with.
Why not?
"I don't..." Dahyun's mouth opened wide when Momo moved the fabric aside and pushed her fingers inside her. A white noise clouded her thoughts and vision. She felt hot.
That was the line for Dahyun. The line Momo shouldn't have crossed. She yanked her hand away and stood up quickly. She almost stumbled and fell, which caused Momo to hold onto her instinctively. Dahyun pulled away a second time, grasping her book bag and theory textbook. Her hands weren't working the way she wanted them to and she dropped everything.
Momo's expression remained neutral, her dark eyes observing as Dahyun fumbled with her belongings. Her face was red. Her eyes were teary.
"I don't like it. That's why." Dahyun eventually replied, her eyes looking deep into Momo's. But she couldn't spot any guilt or regret. Nothing. She looked around again. People were watching the pair. Their eyes were curious, judging.
Dahyun was stupid to think she could get to know Hirai Momo, she thought as she walked away from the library, trying to decipher what the burning ache between her legs meant.
It was strange when Dahyun found herself in the library again the next day. It was strange to think she was sitting in that cubical, waiting for someone.