Never have I felt so exhausted before, I find myself in Dwight's room, but I sit and struggle to fight my eyes. Keeping them open proving to be a harder task then I thought. I rub my eyes with my hand, but only to find the same result.
I hear the door creak open and turn my head towards the sound, Dwight's concerned face watches me for a moment. Relief soon takes over and he approaches me, with a soft smile on his lips.
"Hey Beautiful Girl. How are you feeling?" He asks sitting in a chair positioned next to the bed, one I didn't even notice was there.
I take a moment to assess myself, other then my usual injuries, there was nothing else wrong with me.
"I'm okay, What happened? Where is Axl?" I sit up, as everything comes back to me at once.
"Hey, easy. He's doing okay. Negan gave him some blood and he's recovering. Axl just needs lots of rest like you." Dwight says putting his hand on my shoulder.
"He had a blood transfusion? I need to go see him." I try again to get up, but Dwight holds me down.
"He's okay, baby I promise you, just rest for today and I'll take you to see him tommorow. Take care of yourself first. You aren't much help to him like this." He tells me gently, not wanting to upset me.
I sigh heavily and listen to him, but instead of lying down, I sit myself up in bed.
"Did the doctor say what was wrong with me?" I ask and the look on Dwights' face falls.
"Doc said that you passed out from exhaustion, that the baby growing inside you is using a lot of energy that you're not really aware of. He instructed for you to rest and eat more." I nod my head, but that doesn't explain the look on Dwights' face.
"What else happened?" I grab Dwights' hand in mine and he sighs heavily, not wanting to stress me out further.
"Negan knows about the baby, the doctor was telling me about you when he walked in, wanting an update. He didn't seem mad, he didn't even say anything, he just left the room." Dwight looks up at me, I can see the concern and how scared he is in his eyes.
"Come here." I hold my arms out for him and he kicks off his boots, sliding into my arms. We hold each for what feels like hours but was probably only one.
"I should get you something to eat. I think Eugene wanted to see you as well, I'll send him in for you." Dwight leaves me on my own and a hollowness settles into my bones, I absently rub my belly, to soothe myself and the growing bean inside me.
A knock at the door and then Eugenes' head pokes in the door, I smile at him and he enters, sitting himself on the chair.
"How are you feeling?" Eugene asks, assessing me.
"Like shit if I'm being honest." I laugh at myself before waiting for him. To say what he came here for.
"This might be hard to hear, but I've learnt that Dwight is working with Rick, he's swapped sides." It falls that quiet in the room a pin could have dropped.
"We need to stop this Eugene, its only going to get worse from here."
"I'm aware Negan has me making bullets for him as we speak, I won't be able to visit very often from now on, but I'm working on a plan don't you worry. I'm going to fix this, for Sasha." He says bravely, I nod tears pricking my eyes, I slide my arms around his neck hugging him tightly.
"Take care of yourself Eugene, we need you." I kiss his cheek, smiling softly at him.
"You also take care of yourself." He says before getting up and leaving. I wonder how I'm going to confront Dwight on the topic of him working with Rick, I soon realise that this could be a good thing. Maybe I can get in and talk to Rick somehow, make peace.
Dwight returns about half an hour later, with a tray full of food. He goes about setting up everything in front of me, I decide theres no point in delaying.
"Dwight when were you going to tell me you were helping Rick." I ask softly not wanting anyone to over hear, even if the door is closed. Dwight's face goes dark and anxious, he flicks his eyes up to me, giving me the impression he wasn't ever going to tell me.
I shake my head and sigh, looking away from him, I know talking to Rick could help us, I just hate that Dwight felt the need to not tell me, especially after Negan lying to me all the time.
"I couldn't tell you, you were too close to Negan." He speaks back to me just as softly, but my temper flares at his words.
"Are you fucking kidding me? After everything I've said to Negan and the way he's treated me you think I'd just go back to him?" The rage boils under my skin, I start to realise how easy it is for me to get mad lately and know I need to work on it.
"No I didn't mean it like that. I never thought you would go back to him. I just have trust issues now, after Sherry." Dwight says casting his eyes downward.
"Dwight, you're not the only one with trust issues, I wouldn't dare say anything. You're doing more to protect my son then his own father is. Don't get me wrong I know Negan would do anything for Axl, but he's being consumed by this obsession." I say forcing myself to sit on the side z so of the bed, wincing at the pain.
Dwight reaches out and strokes my cheek with his thumb, I tilt my head into him, moaning softly at the comforting feeling.
"I'm sorry, I'll tell you things from now on." Dwight leans forward and kisses me.
"To make up for it, I want you to take me to see Rick tonight." I say against his lips, he pulls back quickly.
"I can't, it's to risky when I go, let alone both of us and you are still resting." He turns towards his lunch and I sit over in the other chair, digging into my own lunch.
"I need to talk to him Dwight, you're the only one who can take me. We can just say that we went to find somewhere for me stay to help me rest." I tell him simply, not letting this go.
"That's a terrible excuse and what about Axl?" My heart aches thinking about my poor boy.
"He'll be okay for the night, we are going to the 'enemy' anyway" I say using air quotes.
Dwight huffs heavily, pondering over it for a moment, he looks up to study my face.
"Fine I'll take you, but you fucking stay by my side the whole time." He points his fork at me to show he means it.
"Where else would I be?" A loving look settles on Dwights' face, warming my moody heart.
"I need to see Axl before we leave as well, I need to know he's alright." Dwight reaches over and squeezes my hand for a moment before going back to his lunch.
I watch Dwight for a moment, taking in this moment of us and how lucky we to be able to share this together. Another baby on the way and my beautiful little boy who I'm so desperate to see. Maybe one day soon, we will have a chance to do this everyday, together as a family.