Author's Note:
Sorry this has taken so long, my life has been crazy busy, I just wanted to thank you all so much, I can't believe how many reads this has gotten in the past year. So I give you chapter 8!
Clarke POV
*flashback to when Octavia and Clarke went up to talk*
"Okay, so what do we need to talk about?" O asked, I took a minute to gather my thoughts.
"Do you wanna sit first?"
"Do I need to?"
"I guess we will find out," I replied with a sigh. I really need this to go well. I take a deep breath and start telling her everything that happened, starting with accidentally bumping into John by the bathroom, to our planned double date with Becho. When I finished she just stared at me.
"Come on, O, talk to me, please."
"I just don't get it Clarke, why wouldn't you tell me sooner? I think I had a right to know," she said, with a pained look in her eyes. I hate that I caused that.
"I didn't want you to get hurt if it didn't work. I am so sorry, I just wanted to protect you."
"I DON'T NEED PROTECTION! I'm not a little girl anymore," she said, hurt and in pain, and I don't know how to make it better.
"I know, I know. I just, I didn't want you to be in any more pain over Bellamy, than you already are, and I care about you, your my best friend, and I'm sorry I caused you more pain than necessary, but I promise, from now on, you will be kept in the loop on all the comings and goings of this secret, I can't stand to keep it from you anymore." I said, desperate, pleading, and defeated. I feel so guilty.
"Just, keep me up to date on the status of Bellamy, everything you know I want to know, I want to be involved with the scheme, but it has to be believable, so I guess, just keep me up to date. That's all I ask."
"Done."
*end flashback*
I tried to talk to John about what happened in the bathroom with Bellamy during Biology, but he just shrugged and said that they didn't talk. I don't believe that for a second. I'll have to wait for when he is ready to tell me I suppose, but until then, I will have to respect that, even if I think I should know if they were talking about me.
The rest of the day went fairly well considering that I was frustrated, but I have to let it go. If I don't I'll end up fighting with John, and we really need this double date to work out—
We need to talk. Uh oh. This can't be good.
What's up John?
Well, nvm. I shouldn't have said anything.
John. What's going on?????
Nothing. don't worry about it. I'll talk to you later.
As long as you're sure.
I am, I'll talk to you later. Love ya.
"That was weird," I accidentally said, out loud.
"What was?" O said, we had been chilling in my room Lincoln is working, so we actually get to hang out some.
"John, he messaged me, and was acting really weird."
"Weird, did anything weird happen today?" she asked.
"Sure, you can try and make sense of it." I replied, I didn't bother double-checked that nothing incriminating to our secret was involved in the conversation before handing her my phone now that she knew the secret, which I feel better about already. She read the conversation, then kind of just stared at the phone for a while.
"O?" I asked. No response. "Octavia? Everything okay?"
"Uh, I don't know, he said, 'love ya' and you didn't say anything back." She said, matter of factly, as though I was dumb, and maybe I am a tad bit.
"Wait, what?" I asked, not understanding.
"Yeah, it's right here," she said, pointing to the last part of the last message sent.
"I had no idea, I didn't even see it there. Do you think he's falling for me? Or is it more like a friendship love, like between you and me?" I asked Octavia.
"I don't know, Clarkey," she said, sighing. " The only thing you can do is talk to him about it, but you probably shouldn't do that tonight. wait until tomorrow, and talk to him in person, but I wouldn't worry about it too much."
"Thanks, O, I don't know what I would do without you. I'm glad your my best friend," I said as I leaned onto her shoulder. "You know, I am really sorry that I didn't tell you about Bellamy in the first place. Every day that passed I wanted too, but the longer I waited the I got more scared that you would be really mad, and I would lose my best friend."
"I know, I forgive you. You're my best friend, and I know you were just trying to protect me in your own way, and I appreciate that. You will never lose me, we may fight, and disagree, but I won't ever let you lose me, we will always solve our fights. I don't know what I would do without you, Clarke," she said, almost to the point of tears. "I don't know where I would be living right now, and I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love you, and I couldn't wish for a better friend."
"Thanks, O, we should go to bed though, it's getting late," I said, sitting up.
"Yeah, whatever, Mom," she replied getting up and throwing a pillow at me.
"Oh, you are on!"
Murphy POV
I can't believe I just sent that, what if she thinks it's for real, I mean I could have said, "I love you." which is way worse than love ya, Clarke says that to Octavia, then again they've been friends for forever. I can't text her back that I didn't mean to say it, or whoever is in the room with her will think something is up, "How do I get myself into situations like this."
"Situations like what?" Lottie asked as she was walking by, stopping in my doorway. I showed her the messages, "What were you going to tell her?"
"A lot actually, but not that. That was not even in my mind."
"Okay, but do you love her love her? or is it more of a friendship love?"
"That's an excellent question Charlie, and I have no idea what the answer is." What am I supposed to do with my life if I fall in love with someone who is definitely not interested in me in any way other than being my friend? You know, maybe it's just like I wouldn't mind dating her, but I'm okay with being friends. Life is confusing."
"You know, just trust yourself, she's not interested in you in that way, right?"
"Right."
"So, as of right now, just wait and talk to her. It will all be fine, I promise."
"How did you get so smart in the dating world?"
"Honestly, books, movies and observations."
"Oh boy. Thank you Charlie. I appreciate it more than you'll ever know."
"Whatever, just lay off when I get a boyfriend, please."
"Fine, whatever you say, just wait a couple of years, okay, you don't need that stress," I said, and she just nodded and walked out of my room.
Now I need to talk to Bellamy, and after that I'll meet up with Clarke, and explain to her in person, that I said it because it's true, but just as a good friend. She's probably freaking out as much as I am, or more.
A couple minutes went by before I could bring myself to talk to Bellamy, with everything going on, I just couldn't so I sat on my phone, procrastinating on homework and anything else that I needed to do. *bzzzzzzzz* my phone went off.
Hey, Murphy, wanna meet up later?
Yeah sure, when do you wanna meet?
Echo is going out with her friends, I'll tell her I don't feel well, I'll let you know where we can meet when I find out where she is going.
Sounds good. Well, glad I don't have to text him first, I don't want to get him into trouble, and have him get punished because of me. I just, I don't know what to do about Clarke. I have to tell her, but I don't want her or Bellamy to get hurt. This is a sucky situation, and I'm stuck in the middle of it. I wish Roan was still around more, I know he's busy at college, but maybe he would know what to do because I sure don't.*bzzzzz*
Okay, so she and her friends are going to Polis Diner, I'm thinking you and I hang out on the other side of town, maybe Grounders Park? It can only be for like half an hour, but I need to get away.
Okay, when are we meeting?
In about an hour, she's leaving in the next fifteen minutes, giving me 45 minutes to wait and see if she "forgets" something.
As I was typing back, he sent:
Want an apple?
Oh, Crap, she's checking his phone, or about to before she leaves, meaning that he's told her he doesn't feel well, no texting, not until he texts the all clear. I hate this, waiting. It drives me bananas.
Bellamy and I ended up not being able to go to the park, because Echo insisted that she be there to take care of him. So, I asked Clarke what she was up to.
Nothing much. Why?
I thought it would be nice to hang out with my "girlfriend", don't you?
Yeah, probably, lol, I'll see you soon!
Wait am I coming over to your house? or you to mine?
Which would work for you?
Well, I think yours is better.
Okay, then we'll do that. Is Charlie gonna come too? Octavia wants to know lol.
Hang on, let me ask her. "Hey, Lottie? You wanna come with me over to Clarke's? Octavia wants to know!" I yelled, I didn't want to get up until I had to. She didn't respond, so I went over to her room.
"Hey, You wanna come over to Clarke's with me?"
"Yeah, I need a distraction," she replied with a small frown.
"I'm not gonna ask from what, but if you wanna talk about it, you can talk to me."
All she said was, "I know, Johnny."
She said yes, we'll be over soon."
Sounds good, drive safe.
yeesh, I sound like Harper lol
I will, see you soon. I text, and we head over. Clarke and I need to sort this out.
Clarke's POV
"Hey, O, John is coming over!" I yell into the bathroom where Octavia is.
"OOOOOH, is Lottie coming too?"
"I don't know, I'll ask. He said he's gonna ask her."
"Good, she could use some more girl time. and that will give me a reason to leave the two of you alone," she said, coming out of the bathroom.
A couple minutes later he finally texts back that she's coming, and they'll be over soon. "Hey, O, she's coming, they'll be here shortly."
"Sounds good."
"Oh goodness, I can't believe this, I sound like Harper!" I say, flopping onto the bed.
"Oh boy. You need like ten chill pills, you are freaking out over every little detail."
"You're right. I'm just gonna chill, he's probably just as freaked out as I am."
Hey, we're here.
I'll be right down.
Well, They are here, O, let's go greet them." I say headed downstairs, she follows closely behind. Octavia takes Lottie upstairs, and I immediately feel all the strain I felt when I realized what he texted me.
Murphy POV
Octavia takes Charlotte upstairs, and I suddenly remember the crushing fear that Clarke wouldn't want to be friends anymore, and I almost turned around and left. Until she said, "Hey, John, why don't you come sit on the couch with me?"
"That would be great. Thank you for letting us come over so late, Princess, though, I think we should probably talk about the text."
She sighed. You are probably right, I just, you just meant it as friends right, it's not like you are in love with me. right?"
"No, nothing of the sort, I just, I think you are super kind, and I'm glad to have you as a friend, but no I am not in love with you, I just love you."
"Good, cuz that would be super awkward."
"Definitely. Hey, so I know we talked about going to Polis Diner for our double date with Blecho, but what if we went to the Dropship bar and grill, instead?"
"Sure, I don't see why not. What made you change your mind?"
"Well, Lottie and I went there the other day, and one of the waitresses is really cute. Her name is Emori, and I want to get her number."
"Oh, I'm so happy for you John, I think we should stage our break up for that night, because I don't know how much more of this I can handle, and of course we will still be friends afterwards."
"There's something else that has been bugging me, but first, I disagree, we can "break up the next day if you want, but because of what I tried to tell you over text, owe shouldn't."
"What is it John? What can't you tell me?"
"Okay, I'll tell you, as long as you don't tell anyone. Not even Octavia. Lottie doesn't even know."
"I promise, scout's honor."
"You were a girl scout? Never mind, of course you were. Anyway, Bellamy is being manipulated by Echo, she said she would leave all of Bellamy's friends alone if he would go on one date with her, but she keeps changing what classifies as a date, but if we go with and classify it as a date, she can't say it wasn't so we won't do a big public break up like we originally planned."
"OH, Poor Bell, I knew something was up in their relationship, but no one ever believed me."
Author's note:
I know I wasn't sure how long this was going to be, but I have no motivation to go on, I am just going to write one more chapter, to give it the ending I wanted it to have, even though I originally planned to write more, I will post that chapter early August hopefully one year after the original start of this fanfic. I had so much more story to tell, but I just don't have the motivation to write it anymore, thank you all so much for actually reading what I wanted to put out there and share, I had this idea about a year and a half ago, and spent the first six months just writing, then school went out and I had like 4 chapters written, so I decided to post the first chapter, and I really didn't think I would get that many reads, and I just kept going, I imagined the story going in a different direction then what it did, but I like where the story lead me, I'm just sorry I can't do the story justice and wrap it up the way I really want to, but I have too much to do, and while, when I started to finish writing this chapter today I had absolutely no motivation, even the little bit I wrote evolved into something other than what I had planned, and I almost have motivation, I just, don't think it's gonna stick around so I will get to work on the final chapter, sorry this author's note is so long, but thank you for reading it all. I can't believe I made it this far, thank you all so much. The last chapter will be posted on the 31 of July, can't believe I'm almost done.