Sterling

Galing kay variestae

650K 37K 9.6K

It was inevitable. It always has been. From the rumors at his school to his taunting parents behind closed do... Higit pa

INTRODUCTION
PROLOGUE
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Chapter Thirty-Four
Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Six
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Chapter Forty
Chapter Forty-One
Chapter Forty-Two
Chapter Forty-Three
Chapter Forty-Four
Chapter Forty-Five
Chapter Forty-Six
Chapter Forty-Seven
Chapter Forty-Eight
Chapter Forty-Nine
Chapter Fifty
Chapter Fifty-One
Chapter Fifty-Two
Chapter Fifty-Three
Chapter Fifty-Four
Chapter Fifty-Five
Chapter Fifty-Six
Chapter Fifty-Seven
Chapter Fifty-Eight
Chapter Fifty-Nine
Chapter Sixty
Chapter Sixty-One
Chapter Sixty-Two
Chapter Sixty-Three
Chapter Sixty-Four
Chapter Sixty-Five
EPILOGUE
AUTHOR'S NOTE
BONUS SCENE

Chapter One

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Galing kay variestae

"You're cutting? Again?" Jimin asked the small brunette boy, eyebrows furrowing in concern. Taehyung tugged his arm away, turning his head to the side as he pulled his sleeve down, now covering the fresh cuts that were carved in his skin. He felt ashamed that he was cutting himself again, and he couldn't help but feel extremely small and guilty for doing it. "You were doing so good. What happened?"

"It was only two weeks," Taehyung stated as he pulled his bag off his back and stuffed his books inside, zipping it up and slinging it back on his shoulders. He wrapped his arms around himself, eyes trained to the floor. He heard the three males in front of him let out sighs, causing him to look up and see they seemed genuinely worried about him.

"Two weeks or not, it was still a big step for you," Hoseok chimed in gently, grabbing the small male's uninjured wrist, giving him a sympathetic smile. Taehyung's heart broke at the sight of his best friends looking genuinely worried about him. They knew about his past suicide attempts, and they knew about the cutting—hence why they were always worried—but they didn't know what was going on at home behind closed doors—never telling them because he didn't want them to pity him.

"I really thought you were gonna stop for real this time," Yoongi mumbled, his eyes glued on the small male, hands in his pockets. Taehyung just nodded, looking anywhere but them. He hated the looks they were giving him, he fucking hated it. The looks held too much emotion, too much pity, too much sorrow for him, and he couldn't stand it. "What happened, though? How long have you been back at it?"

Taehyung sighed, looking off to the side, eyes scanning the now empty halls, arms wrapping around himself tighter, feeling vulnerable and completely exposed, "I-I... I started doing it again... last night." He turned his head down in shame, lips forming a small frown as he felt arms wrap around his body once again. He didn't know why, but he felt like balling right here in the hallway, not even caring who could hear or see him.

He just wanted to let all the toxic emotions out that he couldn't do with his parents, or else he would get scolded for being weak and a baby, telling him they didn't want to hear him crying. He hated his life back at home, but he couldn't go anywhere because of all the threats his parents have made about him leaving. He knew they would physically kill him if he ever dared try to leave.

"What? Why? What happened?" Hoseok asked, reaching out to place a reassuring hand on Taehyung's shoulder, trying to comfort him. The younger male shook his head, keeping his gaze away from his friends, not wanting to go into detail about the huge fight that pushed him back over the edge between his parents. "Tae, you can tell us. We're here for you."

He looked into their eyes and seen thy were telling nothing but the truth. They've all been friends since forever, and it sickened him that he never went to them to vent. He never went to them when he needed to cry and let out all of the emotions his body just couldn't handle anymore. He never went to them for anything, and he wished it were that simple—that simple to just go to them and tell them everything that was happening back home.

He couldn't. He was afraid of what they were say, what they would do. He was afraid they would look at him differently, treat him like everyone else treated him—like he was nothing. He couldn't bear the though of his best friends doing that and finding out. He couldn't risk what they had—they were all extremely close. And if they found out, what would happen to him?

Would they call the police and he be taken away from his home? Or would they just not say anything and continue to let their best friend live his life of hell? Either way, he didn't like the outcome and he didn't like either of the options. He couldn't risk being taken away and out into foster care. Even though he would no longer be living with his parents, he could be put into a worse home than what he was already in.

He just couldn't take that risk.

Maybe it was time to come clean and tell them what's been going on. They could have two reactions to this whole thing. They could be extremely worried about him and offer him help, understand why he's been doing the things he's been doing—such as attempting suicide and cutting himself. They could understand and try to help him out.

Or they could be angered at the fact he was keeping this kind of information from them. They could not be as understanding as he may want them to be, and they could also be upset with him—not want to be his friend and no longer talk to him—shun him out and treat him like the freak he's made out to be like everyone else does. He didn't want that reaction though. He wanted the first one, but he was too scared to come forward and tell them.

He looked at them, eyes scanning each of his three best friends, his own eyes glossy and round, as if he were scared. He felt his anxiety hit its peak, and he couldn't stand it. He felt like he could hyperventilate at any second, and it was starting to freak him out. Every time his anxiety got that high it was really hard to get him to calm himself down.

It usually took his friends and the school's nurse to get him to breathe normally and calm down. It took a lot of patience and an extreme amount of reassurance. His friends didn't seem to mind it, because they knew about his anxiety and his attacks, along with his PTSD, and how insecure he was about himself. They knew of it all and they didn't treat him any different.

They actually helped him and didn't look at him as if he were a freak like everyone else did. He was genuinely grateful to have these males as his friends, and he couldn't imagine what it would be like to not have them around. They helped him when he truly needed it—such as comforting him when his insecurities got the best of him, when he was having anxiety attacks, and when he was having an episode.

He knew they deserved to know, but he was terrified of the reaction he would receive. All he could do was just stare at them with big, doe eyes, arms hugging himself tightly around his torso, feeling small, vulnerable, scared, insecure, guilty, terrible, and so much more. They've stuck with him through thick and thin, and he's never once come out and told him about his hell of a life he's living.

He didn't want them to think he was doing it for attention or anything either. That thought alone terrified him, because even though he harms himself, his bullies have seen either the scars or the cuts themselves, accusing him of seeking attention, something he absolutely despised. He hated fucking attention with a burning passion, and it was something he refused to seek when it came to anything—such as approval.

He goes to open his mouth, ready to tell them about the fight and only the fight, until they all heard clicking of heels on the white tile floor off in the distance, "You four, get to class!" The four males to looked over to the side and seen a teacher making her way down the hallway they were currently standing in. Taehyung felt his breath hitch, his heart jumping up in his throat, and blood running cold as his eyes grew big.

"Yes ma'am. Sorry," Jimin apologized to the teacher after seeing her rather annoyed features, reaching over and grabbing Taehyung's good arm and pulling him to their first class of the day. The small brunette boy allowed himself to be drug, not really caring about the contact—more concerned at the fact the teacher may tell their principal and they all end up getting detention over it.

They arrived at their first class, Taehyung mentally preparing himself for a scolding of a lifetime as Jimin opened the door to the room. He could hear the small chatter going on behind the object separating them, hearing the teacher's voice along with some whispering of student—and even though they weren't in the room yet, he felt his anxiety spike more and his hands beginning to shake.

Once the door was open, the class and teacher fell silent and all eyes were on the four males making their way into the classroom. The teacher seemed annoyed and irritated at the fact the boy were late, sighing deeply as he leaned back against her desk, looking at them unamused, "You're all late."

Taehyung felt the grip around his good wrist tighten a little, causing him to look over at Jimin and see that he was making eye contact with their teacher, nodding his head as a response. The small brunette boy looked back over at the teacher, unable to find his voice when it came to these kind of situations—the situations he dreaded and couldn't wait to get out of.

"Care to explain why?" Just as Jimin was about to answer, Yoongi scoffed, causing everyone to look at the male off to the side. He was glaring at someone in the classroom full of students, adding on to everyone's confusion, even Taehyung's until his eyes traveled over the crowd towards the back where Yoongi's eyes were glued, and that's when he seen it.

Bogum.

"What the fuck are you doing here?!" Yoongi asked, voice rising with each word as he pointed a finger to the male they had gotten into it with earlier that morning. Taehyung felt his breath hitch from seeing him, not ready to have him in their class, to which he could've sworn he wasn't in.

"Mr. Min, I'm going to have to ask you to please watch your mouth, or I will have to send you to the office," the teacher stated directly to the male, to which Yoongi had ignored and kept glaring at Bogum, who just rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Please, take your seats so I can resume my class—"

"I'm here because I got my schedule changed," Bogum defended himself, glaring right back at Yoongi, who scoffed loudly and crossed his arms over his chest. "Believe me, if would've know you four were in this class already, I wouldn't have gotten it changed. Wouldn't want to be stuck in a room with a freak like him—"

"You better shut your goddamn mouth before I come over there and beat the shit out of you again!" Yoongi growled through clenched teeth, pointing a warning finger at the male. The whole class snickered, and Taehyung didn't know if it was because of the fact Bogum had called him a freak in front of them and they were agreeing, or if it was because of the fact Bogum had gotten his ass beat by Yoongi on several occasions and lost every fight.

"Mr. Min!" The teacher raised her voice—booming through the classroom, causing everyone's mouths to shut and look over at their teacher, who was no longer leaning back on her desk, a glare fixated on the male. "You're awfully close to being sent to the office. Is that something you want?"

Bogum got out of his chair, balling up a piece of paper and waking to the trashcan the male's were currently standing beside, tossing it inside a few feet away from it, standing in front of Yoongi. He crossed his arms and looked at him as if he were trying to intimidate the shorter male, but Yoongi never got intimidated. He was the one who was intimidating, no one else.

"Honestly, you can beat my ass as many times as you want," Bogum began, pausing just to look over, his eyes landing in Taehyung, who was practically hiding behind Jimin and Hoseok for protection. The male smiled wickedly before looking back at Yoongi, "It's never going to stop be from doing whatever the hell I want, and you're definitely never going to scare me. So, beat the shit out of me all you want. I'm not going anywhere."

Just as those words left his mouth, Yoongi went to go after him, only to be stopped by the three males, holding him back by his arms. Yoongi struggled in their grips before finally giving in and deciding to just glare at the male. Bogum chuckled lightly before making his way back over to his seat, sitting down as the students began to snicker.

Taehyung already knew this was going to be a long day.

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