Hey friends! If you like this, you should check out a fanfic that my friend IshipPhalentino started last month, called School's Out For The Summer :3 she's a really great writer and also an amazing person <3 so yeah, check it out!
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Waking up in another person's arms is a feeling very hard to describe without sounding cliché and cinch. Have you ever felt love explode inside your heart like a volcano, leaking down through your stomach and seeping all throughout your body? Has it ever suddenly occurred to you that not one human being on the planet was as happy as you were right in a certain moment? If not, it would be near impossible to convey the warmth, the sheer surreality of being so in love.
And we were in love.
His rich, messy brown hair was tangled up, and sticking to the pillowcase. Gingerly, I brushed it from his face, shivering at the feeling of Austin's soft exhales against my arm. His arms were wrapped around me, but not so tight that I didn't have a little room to squirm. Heat pulsed between us, and I huddled in closer to his chest, grinning to myself. With gentle lips, I kissed his forehead. It gave me that feeling, like when you take a big bite of frosting and your mouth tickles; oh, it was so lovely.
But I had become aware, ever so slowly, that I hadn't showered in over a day, so I slipped from safety of his grip. Placing a pillow in his arms to fill my spot, I started to leave, but turned around when he groaned quietly. I watched in awe as he stirred and pulled it closer to himself, planting a small kiss on it's crown and drifting back to deep sleep. My heart thumped real hard at that: a pure, honest act of love. It didn't need anyone else's eye to exist, and that, to me, was beautiful. After another minute of observation, I snuck out and down the hall, into his bathroom. It was time to get a nice, hot shower.
•••
After having my fill of steamy, relaxing water, I pulled on one of Austin's shirts that I'd grabbed on the way out. It was soft, forest green and kind of sensitive-looking. Three little buttons were stitched in at the top, and it's short sleeves were rolled up once and sewed in place. Of course, it swallowed up my frame, but something inside me came alive and warm from looking at myself in his clothes. Tugging on a pair of grey boxers, my bare feet slapped a little against the floor as I skittered back quickly, already getting cold without the hot water or his arms.
Back in Austin's room, I smiled at the smell of his cologne and summer air, and began to approach his bed again.
But something stopped me.
There he laid, tangled in the sheets and blankets, peeping and snoring softly. His lips pulled up so gingerly at the edges, clutching the pillow to his chest desperately. My eyes zeroed in on him completely, pupils dilating and heartbeat making my whole body shudder with it's force. My body didn't want to leave, to move from this person who made my insides so warm and happy. Slowly, though, I tore myself from him and backed away, closing the door as quietly as I could manage and tiptoeing downstairs.
The bottom floor was doused in early morning light, and it stung my eyes as I floated through the family room and into the kitchen. His fridge hummed, and I liked the sound. It reminded of the noises in my room at night, the melodic rumble of machinery in the room besides mine. Opening the door, I was met with cool air, and searched for a while before pulling out eggs, cheese, and bread. Then ensued The Huge, Ridiculous Search For Pans in Austin's Kitchen, in which I was as quiet as I could be in order to not spill a bunch of dishes and wake my love, who still slept upstairs. Wrapping my hand around a pan, finally, I slid it out of the cabinet and put it on the burners.
There were chickens on the handle of the pan. Thank you, Mrs. Carlile.
Spraying a considerable amount of cooking spray to the pan, I began heating it up. Cooking wasn't my greatest asset, but I could make him some decent scrambled eggs, at least. My mom taught me all the right spices to use, and exactly how much cheese would make it taste amazing. Austin loved food, any kind of food at all, and I knew that, and I wanted to make him happy. Was it a symbol of love to hand someone food and smile? Did it convey my deepest feelings to make breakfast for him? All I could think about was how nice it would be to wake up to a piping hot plate of eggs and toast, and how special and happy he'd feel.
All I wanted was to inspire those feelings that someone really, honestly cared about him.
So, for about an hour, I cooked in his kitchen, making coffee, toast, and the eggs, of course. It made me feel real calm, to be in the warm kitchen, to smell the simmering food and to hear birds singing outside. It was only 9 o'clock, and, looking out the kitchen window, I examined the weather. Clouds hung low in the sky, but, tenaciously, the sun avoided them, still hanging in there and tossing down a shower of light. It was easy to see, though, that it would be grey today. My eyes followed the clouds for a long time as I worked, noting how they grew dark and billowy, tall things with thunderheads. I liked how the sky looked, all twisted up.
My phone began to ring from the kitchen table, inspiring irrational fear inside me. Letting go of the pan, I saw that it was my mother, and answered quickly.
"Hey, mom," I said, feeling scared that she might know my whereabouts.
"Hey, honey, how are you doing? Is everything okay?" she asked concernedly.
"Yeah, everything's good," I replied smoothly. Guilt aside, I was prepared to lie my ass off until everything was okay.
"Good, I was getting worried. You have enough food?" she asked again.
"Yep, I'm all set!" I said cheerily, but tried to keep my voice down for fear of waking my love.
"Perfect. Well, I just wanted to check on you. I think Michael misses you," she chuckled. "We'll be home in 2 or 3 days, alright?"
"Yeah, sounds fine. Thanks for calling," I hinted subtly.
"You haven't had anyone over, have you?" she asked suspiciously, and my heart began to beat faster.
"Of course not. It's just me," I said, throwing in a fake laugh.
"Alright. If you do wanna have some friends over, I suppose that's okay," she offered, and I smiled.
"Thanks, mom. I'll think about it."
"Don't get into any trouble! I'll see you in a couple days," she said.
"Love you, bye." I hung up. It was a nerve-wracking phone call. Letting out a breath, I set my phone down and started putting all the food onto a plate. I just wanted to see those lights in his eyes. His gorgeous, deep brown eyes. It seemed to me that those eyes had never experienced one mundane thing in their existence, yet I knew it not to be true.
"A-Alan?" His dead sexy morning voice called out gently.
I about jumped out of my skin, spinning around to find one extremely disheveled Austin, watching me curiously through blurry eyes.
"Hey, baby," I said, trying to slow down my heart rate. Hesitantly, he approached, looking at my work on the table as a grin spread across his lips.
"What've you got?" he asked, peeking over my shoulder. Handing him the plate, I smiled up at him, hoping it would make him happy.
"I made you breakfast."
He leaned in close and kissed my forehead, for a long time. Warm lips were glued to my skin, making butterflies swarm up through my body.
"Heck yeah," he grinned, and took a bite. "Thank you." His voice was quite sincere, which I loved. We both sat down, kinda watching each other and smiling.
"How long have you been down here?" he asked through the toast. It was endearing to me, and I tried to push the warm fuzzies away from watching him eat.
"Maybe like an hour an a half," I replied, taking a bite, too.
"Why didn't you wake me up?" he asked. Shrugging, I felt heat rise to my cheeks at the thought of his gentle, sleeping form.
"You looked really comfy," I replied. His hand found mine on the table, lacing our fingers together and holding them tight. Quiet, nice air all around us allowed for nothing more than the sound of our breathing, eating, and birds outside. It was easy, I'd found, to just be with him, even if we didn't have words to say to each other. Sometimes, you just didn't need words. His thumb brushed over mine very softly, over and over again, rubbing circles into my skin.
After a while, he spoke again, swallowing quietly.
"No one's ever made breakfast for me before. I mean, I've had other guys over before... and none of them really saw in me what you see."
My heart thudded in jealousy at the thought of Austin with another boy, but I tried to ignore it and focus on what he was trying to say. Feeling overly affectionate then, I just crawled into his lap, and laid my head on his strong shoulder.
"I think you're perfect," I whispered, closing my eyes. His hand rubbed up my back very delicately, running his fingers through my hair and kissing my forehead.
"You're insane," he mumbled back, chuckling and cradling my body into his. Cuddling was probably the best physical part of relationships.
"No... just lucky."
"Most people like me at first because I'm, like, exciting or whatever. But then they get sick of it and see the real me. And then they leave," he said quietly. "I don't want you to leave."
Astonished, I just sat there for a second, trying to fathom why anyone would ever get sick of Austin.
"I'm not gonna leave," I chuckled lightly, because leaving was a preposterous idea. "I don't know what I would do without you."
"Yourself."
"Austin, you soiled it," I groaned, crawling off his lap and ignoring his laughter.
"I saw the opportunity-"
"And you fricking took it," I finished for him, and we high-fived like real high school boys, chuckling. There was something so different about Austin, and I couldn't quite seem to shake it from my bones.
Meanwhile, the clouds had been piling up atop each other and the sun, twisting into huge, menacing shapes. His head turned in the direction of mine, and we both stared out the window for a moment. His eyes held a soft glint, like always. I never missed the way he perceived the world: like something was always about to happen, like he could catch anything thrown at him and make it something marvelous. Austin inspired me to be positive about my life, which was why I loved him.
"Looks like rain," he acknowledged, and I nodded, feeling distant and dreamy at the thought of pouring skies. My hand slipped into his, stomach flipping over and over with nervous happiness. I hadn't felt one of those in a while, but here it was again. Ruddy cheeks marked me as bashful, holding onto his fingers like a child. Our lips curled up, plates empty and stomachs full.
"I'm gonna get dressed," he said. "Come with me?"
"Yeah," I agreed, clearing the plates into his sink.
"What are you doing?" He furrowed his dark eyebrows.
"Cleaning up," I shrugged. His face was blank for a second, and then he nodded.
"Right. Cleaning."
"You don't clean much, do you?" I giggled, putting everything away.
"I do!" he said indignantly.
"Mhm," I hummed, smirking. His playful eyes darted to mine before he grabbed me from behind, wrapping his arms around my stomach and burying his face in the crook of my neck.
"You're a little shit and I love you," he murmured. Breathing in his smell, I shivered in happiness and grinned a little to myself, leaning into his touch.
"Look at that smile," he commented. "So beautiful." Blushing, I tried to cover my face, but he pried my fingers away. It was almost embarrassing, how I couldn't stop smiling. But everything just felt so good when he was with me.
"Come on, let's go get dressed." I tugged him away towards the stairs, feeling heat on my cheeks. In our boxers, we clambered up into his room. Since my shirt was clean, all I needed was pants. Austin stripped down immediately, pulling absolutely everything off, making my whole face go red. He hadn't even thought to warn me! But I tried to be mature about it and not stare at his bare naked ass as he pulled on a clean pair of boxers.
"Nice shirt, Alan, where'd you get it?" he asked teasingly as I danced into a pair of skinny jeans to get them on.
"Sorry, I didn't ask," I said awkwardly. He blew out air dismissively and grabbed a white shirt, pulling it over his head. His hair came out all messed up, so I tiptoed over and fixed it, brushing it back the way I liked.
"You never have to ask," he mumbled, looking into my eyes. "Besides, it looks better on you. Keep it." His hands made their way to my hips, holding me safely before our lips met in a sweet, innocent kiss. Smiling, I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed back. The feeling of his warm breath on my cheeks and chin was like a drug; I couldn't seem to get enough of it. Tentative and a little wet, our lips met again and again, until we pulled away, watching each other with embarrassed happiness.
"Thank you," I said, brushing the dark hair from his forehead again.
"当然,可以." He breathed a Chinese phrase, watching me with love in his eyes.
"What?" I giggled. He shook his head lightly, laughing.
"Sorry, I don't even realize that I do that sometimes. I said 'of course it's okay'," he replied, holding onto the hem of my shirt a little. "I even dream in Chinese sometimes."
"Awh." I pressed my lips together, smiling. He was so cute sometimes; it made my head hurt. After getting all dressed, we wandered back downstairs. I kept smelling my shirt, and a baggy grey hoodie that Austin had zipped up on me, because, apparently, "it's nippy out". They both smelled like him, and I liked that quite a lot.
Standing in the kitchen, I poured a cup of coffee and sipped it. A snap and flash surprised me, and I whipped my head around. My camera sat in his hands, a picture sliding out of it. Sighing, I ambled over and took a look at his mischievous, grinning face. Unamused, I snatched the picture and observed it. Drowning in his clothes, I looked actually really peaceful with the mug to my lips; I found myself liking the picture.
"I found this strange portrait-making contraption," he said, stifling giggles. "And I thought, 'why not utilize it's power?' "
As a snarky reply made its way up my throat, a clap of thunder halted it in it's tracks, and both our eyes darted to the window. He set the camera down absentmindedly, and we watched in wonder as it began to sprinkle.
"That's nice," I allowed quietly, unsure if he even heard me. Quickly, the light shower transcended into fat, pouring droplets of rain. They beat down on the ground relentlessly, spraying up and skittering all across the surface. Some strange, remote part of me came through right about then, taking over and begging me to go outside.
Without even thinking about it, I floated over to the door, which was glass, and led outside to the backyard. Austin said nothing, but followed me as I slid it open. Loud pitter-pattering characterized the weather, wind blowing harshly against the dark sky. Power and energy surged through the clouds.
I could feel it in my bones, so deeply.
Closing the door behind us, Austin trailed me as I walked into the yard, letting the wind blow through and tangle my hair. It was cold, and the rain poured down on our heads. Turning to him, I grinned giddily and took his larger hands in mine. The rain made it hard to see, dripping in my eyes, but I didn't care. Austin brushed the slick, wet hair from my forehead, smiling at me. Rain surged down his lips as they met mine, smiling hard into my mouth before kissing me passionately.
"Hang here for just a second, okay?" he whispered, kissing my forehead slowly.
"Okay," I smiled, my eyes still closed from the kiss. Dashing away, he left me in the crazy storm, and I breathed it in. My palms faced up to the sky, letting rain spill into them, and I grinned. It was more than beautiful. Walking further, I just let myself become totally drenched by it. Suddenly, though, I heard music.
Snickering, I thought of course to myself. Austin set his iPod dock inside the door, leaving it open, and ran to me, almost slipping in the mud.
Man Overboard blasted through the speakers, and it made me wanna run, and jump, and kick things until all my energy was gone.
"Wanna play hide and seek?" I asked quickly, rain dripping in between my lips as I spoke.
"Hell yes." He slapped a high-five into my palm before yelling, "Who wants to be it? Not-it!" and touching his nose before I could beat him to it. "You're it!" he crowed, and started running towards the woods. Frustratedly amused, I covered my eyes and counted to fifty.
"Apples, peaches, pumpkin pie, who's not ready? Holler 'I' !" I called out the chant that we'd always used in my house, and wandered further back. From behind a row of bushes to my far left, I heard Austin burst laughing, then pop out to look at me.
"What the actual hell was that?" he demanded, giggling and shaking his head.
"That's what we always did when I was growing up," I shrugged.
"That's adorable," he smiled, ruffling my hair. "Okay, it was worth losing a turn. You hide now." He patted my ass lightly, pushing me away as he began counting with his eyes closed.
I took off running, my eyes dead set on the woods as the rain pounded overhead. As soon as I entered the dense pines, I found a huge gathering of them and squeezed in between, making myself invisible. Cold, giddy, and excited, I tried to make myself as quiet as possible.
"I'm not saying the rhyme!" I heard him yell a minute later, his voice far away. His footsteps, though, I could hear them getting closer. It made me even more excited, and I wanted to run, but I stayed put.
"Alan?" he called out. It sounded to me like he was already in the woods. Stifling giggles, I kept still. Through the branches, I could see him wander straight past me. The music was still audible, somehow. Probably sound waves bouncing off all of the trees out there.
"Where are you?" he groaned from 30 feet away. I couldn't help it; I giggled.
His head snapped over in my direction, and our eyes met through the branches.
"Gotcha!" he crowed, and I burst through the trees and ran. Following me, he was at my heels as I darted out of the forest and back towards the house.
It's was a little useless, though; I'd never outrun a football player!
"Get back here!" he yelled, laughing. Having so much fun, I laughed, too, and he caught up. Of course he caught up. Grabbing me in his arms, Austin pressed his cold lips to my neck and kissed me playfully. I got up on my tiptoes and kissed his lips, giggling into his mouth. Our drenched bodies pressed together, making warmth flood my body.
Over the speakers, the current song came to an end, and Lullaby, by The Spill Canvas came on. He shuffled away a little, looking into my eyes and smiling.
"Would you dance with me?" he asked hopefully. The rain dripped down his face and from his hair as it soaked the both of us. Nodding, I tried to contain my grin, and wrapped my arms around his neck. His hands took me by the hips, pulling my body much closer.
"It's the way that you blush when you're nervous. It's your ability to make me earn this."
He moved fluidly, bringing me with him. Austin knew I had no balance, and took it upon himself to lead as we slow-danced in the rain. For some reason, I couldn't bear to tear my eyes from him; I felt so in love... I never wanted to look away.
"It's about how you laugh out of pity. Cause let's be honest: I'm not really that funny."
Austin grinned, dipping his head bashfully. I smiled back, letting him pull me along. He was a good dancer, I realized; it made me fall harder. He held me tight, our bodies subjected to the beautiful storm around us. I'd never danced before, but now, as Austin danced with me, it felt so right. The universe all around us cradled our love, letting everything fall into place.
"It's your finger, and how I'm wrapped around it. It's your grace, and how it keeps me grounded. I know that you're weak, just let me sing you to sleep."
Laying my head against his shoulder, I sighed in happiness and closed my eyes.
"Rest assured, if you start to doze, then I'll tuck you in, plant my lips where your necklace is close."
We moved in such a lovely way through the rain, never separating from one another. At ease more than ever, I kissed his shoulder. Tilting my head back, our lips were allowed the sweet pleasure of meeting for a kiss.
"I was constructed for you, and you were molded for me."
He kissed me very softly, like my lips were delicate and fragile.
"Now I feel your name, coursing through my veins. You shine so bright, it's insane. You put the sun to shame."
For another beautiful moment, we held each other.
"I love you, Alan," he whispered, looking down at our muddy feet for a second and then back to my eyes. It sounded so raw that my stomach twisted.
"I love you, too."
We watched each other for a moment, just feeling everything so deeply. I brushed the hair from his forehead, and he took my hand, leading me back inside. Turning off his speaker and setting it away, we reentered the warm house and closed the door behind us. Peeling off my wet hoodie, shirt, and jeans, Austin did the same with his clothes and tossed them into the dryer. My cold, half naked body craved warmth, and I skittered up the soft carpeted stairs to his room.
Opening his drawer, I pulled out a pair of clean sweatpants and a black shirt that said 'Defend Pop Punk' in flowered font. He walked in as I did so, and placed his cold hands on my bare hips from behind. Pulling me to his chest, Austin kissed my neck softly, his chilled skin pressing against mine. It felt so good to be close to him, and I leaned into his touch.
"Wear whatever you want, baby," he murmured, sending even more chills down my body. He looked down at what I had picked out, and smiled pridefully. Taking the soft shirt from my hand, he slipped it over my head, laughing at the way it hung off of my frame. Lovingly, he rolled the sleeves up once, and pecked my forehead.
"Now you're pop punk," he teased.
"You would know."
"Mmm, so snarky," he whispered, nipping at my bottom lip. "Put some pants on."
He walked away and started finding his own clothes, and I slipped into his grey sweatpants, with our football team name up the side. He had on some red plaid pajamas, and a grey pullover when he was finished, and handed me a towel for my hair.
It was so sweet how he was always thinking about me. Looking out his window, I saw that lightning had begun to strike, and felt thankful that we'd gotten out just in time. The whole sky was dark, even though it was only early afternoon. I liked the weather, though, because it was pretty, and we were safe in his house. His hand linked with mine, making me squeeze back.
"Hungry?" he asked, and I nodded. "Let's make something warm to eat," he suggested. Under a spell from the rain and from his love, I followed him down the stairs. We grinned, looking out the glass door as thunder shook everything. It was so dark outside that it almost looked like night was approaching. Storms made everything feel so powerful.
"I'm kinda tired," I said, warming up already in his clothes and taking a seat at the island table.
"Yeah, me too," he smiled, and started getting out bread and cheese. "You just sit there and look pretty. I'll make us some grilled cheese."
I made the most hideous face I possibly could.
Austin rolled his eyes.
"You're beautiful even when you're ugly," he sighed, and I snickered.
"Whatever, la la la." I plugged my ears and ignored him. Watching, though, I observed as he turned the burner on and started making delicious food for us.
"Thanks for having me over," I said shyly, and he quirked his eyebrow at me for a second.
"Thanks for coming. I'm really happy that we got these days together," he said, and I nodded earnestly. "My parents are coming home tomorrow," he reminded me.
"I still have two days home alone after this," I replied. "Do you...wanna have a double sleepover?"
He sported a crooked grin.
"Nothing would make me happier."
After the grilled cheeses were done, Austin and I closed all the shades, and turned a lamp on in the family room. It casted warm, soft light on the couch as I sat down, wrapping a big blanket around myself. Digging into the sandwich, it's hot, gooey cheese warmed me right up. Austin brought us two mugs of hot chocolate with mini marshmallows, and cuddled on the couch with me. Pulling more blankets around our intertwined bodies, he made and nice, toasty cocoon, and turned on Netflix. With our hot coco and melty sandwiches, we were happy, and I laid my head on his shoulder.
He planted kisses on my forehead, and I shivered in delight.
"Let's watch Alice In Wonderland," he suggested, and I nodded sleepily.
"Anything you want, baby."
"You tired?" he asked amusedly.
"Mhm."
"Gonna fall asleep?"
"No. I know you don't like watching TV alone," I replied, sitting up straight and holding onto his arm.
"You're such an angel."
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I started a new Cashby short story thing. *shamelessly self promotes* please can you guys go check it out? It's called 'it's okay to not know'.
Let me know what you thought of the chapter!! as always, I love you all to death. Stay strong ✌❤