Ito na talaga, last na talaga! hahaha! May bigla kasi akong naisip, kaya kailangan ko pa i-post muna itong isang chapter bago ang isang malaking bagsak! Ayan! Maraming maraming salamat sa lahat ng sumusuporta sa TLISA! Hindi ito aabot ng ganito, kung hindi dahil sa inyo!
By the way, I'm planning to request a book trailer for our dear story. I want your bright ideas for this, guys. Can you please suggest a song that would fit the story? Ang dami ko kasi naiisip, hindi ako makapag-decide! So baka sa mga suggestions niyo, makapili na ako. Woo!
This chapter's soundtrack by the way is Slipped Away by Avril Lavigne. Enjoy! :)
***Red's POV***
"Uhm... I didn't know what to say, actually." Joyce started to speak in front of the podium. "Ilang buwan ko lang naman nakilala si Kuya Vince, pero ang masasabi ko lang, mabait siyang tao. Mukha lang siyang mayabang, pero kabaliktaran siya nun. Simple lang naman ang gusto niya sa buhay-- maging masaya at i-enjoy lahat ng oras na meron siya." I saw her held back tears and looked at the crowd. "There's more to him than his good looks. He had a selfless heart and a brave soul."
"Nagtataka siguro kayo kung bakit may kulang sa okasyon na 'to. Hindi kasi niya kaya. Hindi niya pa rin matanggap ang nangyari. She's in our room still crying over his death." Joyce looked at the Dorms direction as if she could see her grieving roommate. "She told me great things about Kuya Vince-- mabait siyang anak at kapatid and he loved his family more than anything. He made a promise to himself na aalagaan niya ang pamilya niya since they don't have their father anymore. Pero mukhang hindi na iyon mangyayari."
"Kuya Vince, wherever you are, thanks for the good memories that you've shared with us. You will always be in our hearts and we will make sure that this will be addressed soon." Silence crept as she said the last phrase. May binabalak ba siyang gawin?
I climb the stairs of the make-shift stage and held the piece of paper tightly. Not in my wildest dreams did I imagine that I would do this soon. Hindi ako natulog magdamag, flashes of him popped out of my head everytime I closed my eyes. Ayokong isipin ang hirap na pinag-daanan niya sa kamay ng mga walang-pusong taong iyon! He didn't deserve that! He didn't deserve to die! I stood in front of the podium and faced the grieveing crowd. I swallowed a big lump in my throat before I started to talk.
"Nakita ko si Vince noong Freshman orientation three years ago. Noon kasi, orientation muna, bago magbigay ng Dorm assignments. Nainis ako sa kanya noong una kasi parang ang hangin hangin, presko at sobrang bilib sa sarili. Madami na talagang humanga agad sa kanya, day one pa lang. Kaya noong naging roommate ko siya, inisip ko agad na magpa-transfer ng kwarto. Unfortunately, switching of rooms was not allowed, kaya nag-tyaga ako sa kanya." I heard a few chuckles from the crowd and I inhaled deeply before continuing my speech.
"Hindi ko siya kinakausap, ayoko kasing makarinig ng kahit na anong salita galing sa isang mukhang mayabang na tao. He was the first to approach me habang nag-aayos kami ng mga gamit namin sa kwarto. Naalala ko ang una niyang tinanong sa akin, "Nagba-basketball ka?", mukha daw kasing maganda 'yung court dito sa Campus Grounds. Sinungitan ko pa siya, hindi ako sumagot. Tapos, inaya niya naman ako kumain sa Cafeteria. Nairita ako kaya nasinghalan ko siya agad na 'wag akong kausapin."
"Pero kahit ganun ako sa kanya, naging mabait siya sa akin. He may not look like it, pero sobrang bait ni Vince. He's just the typical high school guy, nagkataon lang talaga na biniyayaan siya ng sobrang ka-gwapuhan." I couldn't help but to smile at the thought. "He shared things that he had, food, clothes, his gadgets. Napaka-simple ng pagkatao niya, kabaliktaran sa unang impression ko sa kanya. Malamang, marami sa inyo, ganun din ang tingin sa kanya. Pero sa kabila ng chickboy image niya, isa lang siyang simple at masayahing tao."
"He's the brother I never had. He's been with me since day one. And now he's gone." Hindi ko masabi lahat ng gusto kong sabihin dahil sobrang hirap. Hindi ko matanggap na wala na ang best friend ko. Ang bukod-tanging taong nakipag-kaibigan sa akin at tumanggap sa akin bilang ako. "Vince, pare--" I paused ang looked at the sky as if he was just there. "hindi ko alam na selfish ka pala. You knew that something's bound to happen, pero hindi ka nagsalita." A tear fell from my eye. I never thought that I'd be doing this in my life-- to cry for someone that you've lost. Ganito siguro 'yung pakiramdam ni Miss Rachel noong nalaman niyang wala na ang pinsan niya. "Anyway, thanks for all the years of friendship and you will never be forgotten."
I stepped away from the podium and let go of the white balloon that I was holding. The other students and members of the Faculty did the same. Ilang lobo pa ba ang kailangang lumipad mula sa loob ng Monte Carlo? I felt so angry right now. Angry to whoever's doing these killings and angry to myself for not going home early that night. Baka sakaling hindi ito nangyari.
Isang linggo matapos ang insidente, nakatanggap ako ng notice galing sa Admin. They were asking me to move out of the room. Ito na ang pangalawang notice na pinadala nila sa akin at katulad ng sa nauna, I would decline. His things were still here at parang nandito pa rin siya. Hindi ko ginalaw ang kahit na ano sa mga gamit niya, maliban sa mga libro at notebook na naikalat ni Dawn when she looked for the red note that nobody knew Vince received.
She stared at the red note for a few seconds before she broke down and went hysterical. Doble siguro ng galit na nararamdaman ko ang sa kanya. It took half an hour before Nurse Andrew had her calmed and he had to inject something to her para kumalma siya at makatulog. The Paramedics and the Police arrived an hour after we found the body. They let me stay at another room that night, pero hindi din naman ako nakatulog. I was interviewed by Inspector Gia Chan and I just told her what happened that night.
"Mga anong oras ka nakabalik sa kwarto niyo?"
"Around eight thirty to nine po, Inspector. Galing kasi ako sa meeting ng Math Club kaya ginabi ako. I did advise him na baka late na ako makauwi at sabi niya kakain na lang daw siya kasama si Dawn."
"Can you describe to me in details kung ano 'yung nangyari simula nang umalis ka sa Math Club meeting niyo?"
"Uhm. I texted him after the meeting. Pero hindi siya nag-reply, so inisip ko baka magkasama pa sila ni Dawn. Dumiretso na ako sa dorm, like the usual thing that I do everyday. Pag-tapat ko sa kwarto namin, patay 'yung mga ilaw, so I thought na wala pa siya sa kwarto. Pagpasok ko ng susi sa doorknob, hindi pala naka-lock. Nagtaka na agad ako, kasi Vince wouldn't leave our door unlocked."
"And what did you do after that?"
"I opened the door and called out his name. Binuksan ko 'yung ilaw at wala akong nakita sa kwarto. 'Dun ko narinig 'yung tubig sa banyo. Akala ko naliligo lang, pero napansin kong hindi sarado 'yung pintuan ng banyo kasi nakikita ko 'yung ilaw mula sa loob 'nun. Pinuntahan ko 'yung banyo at..."
"Nakita mo na 'yung bangkay?" I nodded because I couldn't let another word out. "And then Dawn came in?"
"Hindi ko alam kung ilang minuto ang pagitan nang pagdating namin ni Dawn. Hindi ko na alam kung anong oras na, kasi... kasi..." I brushed my hair with my hand at parang gusto kong sumigaw sa galit.
"This must be very hard for you, losing your friend. Thank you for your time, Raphael."
I was walking back to the dorm that day after a long day of classes when I saw her standing in front of the Cafeteria. She looked a like a ghost-- pale white, unfixed hair and dark circles were around her eyes. Naging sobrang tahimik na siya simula nang nawala si Vince, she pushed people away and she only kept for herself. Lagi na din mainit ang ulo niya, kahit si Joyce napagbubuntungan niya na. She was back to her old self, mas grabe pa, kung tutuusin. Bigla na lang siyang nananapak ng kahit sino sa hallway. She was suspended from SC because of this, the Admin was kind enough not to remove her from the council.
I just looked at her and continued walking when she grabbed my arm from behind and stopped me. Hinanda ko na ang sarili ko para sa isang suntok, pero walang nangyari. I faced her and she was just looking down on the ground while she held my arm tightly. Hindi ko ma-imagine na pwede palang maging ganito kalamig ang isang buhay na tao.
"Red, okay ka lang?" One senior passed us and noticed that I was not moving away from her grasp. She turned her head and looked at the guy who asked. Lumuwag ang pagkaka-hawak niya sa braso ko at agad ko itong hinawakan.
"Okay lang ako, pare. Salamat. Sige, umalis ka na." Bago ka pa maka-tikim ng kamao ng nagluluksang girlfriend. "Dawn." She looked down on the ground again at ngayong hawak ko siya, napansin ko kung gaano kalaki ang ipinayat niya. My heart was filled with concern, pero hindi ko alam kung ano ba'ng dapat gawin sa kanya. She's a live bomb, she could explode anytime.
"Bakit..." I heard her whispered.
"Ano 'yun?" I inched closer to her para marinig kong mabuti ang sinasabi niya.
"Bakit hindi mo siya niligtas?!" She punched me in the face and pushed me to the ground. Sobrang bilis ng nangyari, hindi ako naka-react agad. Sa payat niyang 'yun, may lakas pa siya para manakit ng tao. "Bakit?! BAKIT?!" She was screaming all the time while she rained punches on me. I tried to dodge and cover myself, pero sadyang malakas talaga siya.
I heard voices coming to us. They pulled her away from me and I even heard someone called the nurse. She's going out of her mind, 'yan ang sinasabi nila. But I knew better. I knew where she's coming from and I even admired her for being brave enough to let her emotions out. Hindi katulad ko. Galit ako pero hindi ko magawang sabihin. Wala akong magawa. Wala akong nagawa.
"I'm okay, Nurse Andrew. Kamusta si Dawn?" Ginagamot ako ni Nurse Andrew sa labas ng Clinic. Nasa loob kasi si Dawn tinitignan ng school doctor namin na naka-schedule na bumisita ngayon. Pumupunta siya dito twice a month as per the rules implemented to all private schools.
"Sinaktan ka na niya, siya pa rin ang inaalala mo?"
"She's not herself, Nurse Andrew. She's going through something and I understand her situation."
"How long are you going to do this in behalf of your friend?"
"What?" That caught me off guard.
"I know you, students. Hindi natin kailangang maging close for me to get your personalities." Hindi ko siya maintindihan. Kapag kumausap ka nga naman ng matanda, nagiging mahirap intindihin ang mga bagay. Baka ginagamitan niya ako ng psychiatric moves niya?
"Nurse Andrew, Dawn is already asleep. Call an ambulance and assist her there." Ambulansya?
"Dok, may problema po ba kay Dawn? Bakit po tatawag ng ambulansya? May nangyari ba sa kanya?" I stood up and faced the doctor. Hindi nila palalabasin ang isang estudyante sa Monte Carlo, unless malala ang lagay niya.
"She needs further medical assistance. She's depressed and this triggers a lot of things. Nakakasakit na siya ng ibang tao and we don't want to wait for the moment na sarili na niya ang saktan niya." Tama. Hindi na namin dapat antayin ang oras na 'yun. If there's one thing that I had to do, na alam kong sasabihin din sa akin ni Vince, 'yun ay ang alagaan si Dawn.
[Magkita tayo.]
I received a text from Dawn the next day. It was Saturday and I checked the time when she sent the message-- two fourty in the morning. Her medications were definitely not working. O nilalabanan lang niya ang epekto nito. I heard from the nurse that she was given an anti-depressant and was advised to be around the people she's close with para hindi niya maalala ang bagay na nag-cause ng depression niya. More diversional activies, to be exact.
She never talked to anyone, ito ang unang beses na nag-reach out siya sa iba. What about Joyce? Okay lang kaya siya? Bakit ako ang gustong makita ni Dawn kung nandoon naman ang roommate niya? I checked the time and it's six thirty in the morning. Natulog kaya siya? I typed a new message and sent it to Joyce.
[Gudam. Ok lng b kau jan?] A couple of minutes after I sent the message, I got a new one.
[Ok lng, Kuya Red. hnd na nman xa n2log.] Just as I thought.
[pls look after her and txt me if she goes out. tnx.]
Tumayo na ako at naligo. Ano ba'ng gagawin ko sa kanya? Tuwing nakikita ko siya, naaalala ko si Vince. Sigurado akong ganun din siya sa akin, pero bakit gusto niya akong makita? Gusto na naman ba niya maglabas ng sama ng loob?
Wala na akong narinig kay Joyce hanggang lunch. I ate alone in the Cafeteria and went back to the dorm to get my guitar. Dinala ko ang gitara ko at tumungo sa Restricted Garden. It's been a while since I came here. This place was the only place that listened without complain. I sat on the old bench and started strumming. I somehow felt calm. I played random songs, minsan kumakanta ako, minsan hindi.
I was strumming along to a new song when I heard footsteps. I stopped playing and looked at the direction where the noise came from. There she stood, checkered blouse and jeans on. She looked at me and I gauged her mood. I held my guitar tighter and prepared to use it as a shield if ever she attacked me again. We stayed that way for a couple of minutes and then she walked towards me. I held my breath as I waited for her next action.
She sat beside me and looked down. I looked at her and she looked back. Her eyes were so sad, mukhang katatapos lang niya umiyak. Kumalas siya sa pagkakatingin sa akin at hinawakan ang gitara. Gusto niya ba'ng tumugtog ako? I relaxed a bit and played a song. I didn't sing, we just listened to the sad tune and I thought of something. This could be of a little help for her. The first song ended and I started a new song.
"Na, na... Na, na na, na na..." I started to sing.
"I miss you, miss you so bad
I don't forget you, oh it's so sad
I hope you can hear me, I remember it clearly" She sang in a soft tone.
"The day you slipped away
Was the day I found it won't be the same, oh..." I sang the second stanza and she sang whenever she felt like it. It was the perfect sad song.
"I had my wake up
Won't you wake up
I keep asking why
And I can't take it
It wasn't fake
It happened, you passed by
Now you are gone, now you are gone
There you go, there you go
Somewhere I can't bring you back
Now you are gone, now you are gone
There you go, there you go,
Somewhere you're not coming back"
Tears rolled down her cheeks and she stopped singing. I just let her be and continued playing the guitar. The more she cried, the closer she got to moving on. At least, that's what I believed in. I continued playing songs at bigla ko na lang naramdaman ang ulo niya sa balikat ko. I looked at her and noticed that she fell asleep. Nobody deserved this emotional torture. Not me, not her.
---END OF CHAPTER 11.22.14