3068 words
Eccedentesiast
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meaning: someone who hides pain behind a smile.
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Lydia's POV, later that night:
Later that night, once I finally got into my bed I couldn't sleep. I was exhausted but my mind just wouldn't shut up for a single moment to let me rest, by this I mean just like almost every other night I was thinking too much. Why haven't I told the guys the truth? When will I? Am I going to wait until I'm practically dead from a beating to admit the truth? What will they think? What if they think I'm weak... or when I tell them the things my mom tells me they'll agree. What are these feelings I have with Stan recently?
Soon enough I was halfway asleep, just as I was about to completely fall asleep the sound of wind and a breeze from my window, which my back was currently turned against, caused me to open my eyes.
I racked my brain, trying to remember if it was open before or not before sitting up in my bed, when I looked towards my window I jumped at the sight of.... Richie? " Rich, what the hell are you doing here?!" I whisper yelled, hoping to not get the attention of my mother who had arrived home not too long ago, completely drunk of course.
Richie looked annoyed or angry, he didn't answer my question but just rolled his eyes and sat in a chair I had in the corner of my room, knocking a blanket that was sitting on it on the floor. " Rich? Is everything okay? Did I do something or...." I trailed off the end of my sentence noticing how he seemed annoyed at my presence even though he came to me, he didn't seem like him though, something was different.
Richie scoffed lightly before answering "I'm just here to let you know your not invited to come along to the quarry tomorrow, none of us want you there" he spoke harshly. I could already feel the tears coming to my eyes "what the hell are you talking about Rich?" I asked as I slowly began to sit up more in my bed.
" I mean, we aren't really your friends Lydia. We just felt bad for you in school so hung out with you and today we just wanted more help finding Georgie, we're all getting sick of you now and we are tired of pretending to like you. We don't care about you and never will, got it?" Richie spoke on as tears fell down my face, this must be a dream or something, right?
I covered my face with my hands as I continued crying and whispering the word "no, no, no" over and over until my room went silent, I could no longer hear the wind coming through my window. I slowly moved my hands away from my face and looked up, my window was closed, there was no Richie and the blanket he dropped earlier was messily thrown back on the chair. I limped over to the window, my ankle still in pain and looked out the window. Nothing.
I quietly sighed to my self in relief, it was just a dream. I closed my curtains and turned to go back to bed but instead of turning to see an empty room there was now a clown near my door, he had a sinister looking grin on his face as he looked straight into my eyes with his yellow ones.
My breathing quickened as I debated what to do next, do I call for my mom? God knows she would just let whatever this thing is kill me, I tried to talk but nothing could come out, as if I had lost my voice.
"What's wrong Lydia? cat got your tongue?" the clown spoke tauntingly. This cant be a dream, the sick feeling in my stomach is too real for this to be a dream. "Who are you and what do you want?" I spoke up, I tried making my voice sound confident but of course it came out shakily and barely a whisper.
The clowns smile grew bigger as it slowly stepped forward, resulting in me stepping back, until I hit the wall "I want you, Lydia, to come with me, you can come play with Georgie? How about we go see your dad?" the clown spoke before laughing lightly. "I'm not going anywhere with you!" I shouted through my tears, the clown began to ran up to me as I screamed for help and put my arms over my face, hoping if I was about to be killed it would happen fast and I wouldn't be in too much pain.
I could hear my door being flung open and footsteps angrily walk towards me before a pair of hands grabbed at my arms and yanked them away from my face " What the hell are you screaming at you bitch!" the dreadful voice of my mother screamed at me as I slowly opened my eyes and scanned around my room, once again.... Nothing.
"the- the clown! he was right here!" I said through tears, frantically looking around for proof, of course my mom wasn't happy, this was proven when she tightened her grip on my arms and slapped the same side of my cheek as earlier, in shock I stumbled backwards and tripped on something on my floor, my ankle hurting even more.
Now I was on the floor, using one of my elbows to hold me up as my other hand held my stinging cheek. My mother hovered above me as she continued screaming and shouting, kicking or slapping me every so often as well. This went on for hours before I blacked out from pain and crying, our neighbouring houses were vacant which was lucky for my mom I guess. I knew I'd have to go through a lot of work tomorrow to hide all my bruises and cuts around the guys but this happened often and I was almost a pro now.
The next morning
Today was the quarry and if I'm honest, I've never been more terrified. My body had many scratches or bruises from last night, although they weren't too bad (over the time this has been happening I've learnt many tricks to make them heal faster) I knew they would be more visible if I had only my undergarments on for swimming. I stood staring at myself in the mirror, looking over my outfit for about the hundredth time.
(I tried, I didn't want her to wear something heavy at the quarry but also wanted to find something 80s themed also not just one shoe, it is two but it's just to show)
After finally deciding it was good enough I grabbed the same bag as yesterday, my notebook still in it and went out to the garage for my bike, I decided against riding with Stanley today even though I did enjoy spending time with him, the feeling I got around him was just confusing me too much, my mom was also thankfully going to be out for the next few days, some guy she met at a bar wanted to spend a few days away, nothing new for me.
I pulled out my bike and began my ride to the quarry. As the wind blew through my hair and cars drove past me I found myself thinking back to last night, what if the boys actually think that? I still have no idea whether it was real or not, sure felt real but.... that clown? What did it want? Or what about Georgie and my dad, why did he bring them up?
My thoughts stopped once I finally arrived at the quarry and began walking towards it. As I came to the end of the trees I could hear the boys "alright who's first?" Bill asked as they all looked down, I felt a tap at my shoulder and spun around to see Beverly, she put a finger up the her lips, signalling me to be quiet and began taking of her shoes, I took the hint and began undressing too.
"We'll go!" she spoke up, all the boys turning to look at us. As she unbuttoned her dress, I slipped mine over my head, suddenly feeling VERY self conscious, she grabbed my hand and quickly ran towards the edge "sissies!" she called out before we jumped, incoherent shouts coming from Richie as we went down but they became muffled as my head went under the water.
I smiled to myself as I rose up from the water and wiped my eyes "we just got shown up by two girls!" Richie shouted from the top, I heard Beverly laugh as I smiled and began swimming on my back, I could hear the boys slightly talking from the top but closed my eyes and let myself zone out.
Once the boys finally worked up the courage to jump in I stayed near the shallow end, sitting in the sand and looking at a bad bruise on my leg, I felt like being alone today but knew I couldn't do that, I could hear someone walking up to me and looked up to see Stan
"are you okay?" he asked, looking at the bruise I had barely covered with my hand and then to me, "yeah, I'm fine. I fell off my bed last night hence the.." I replied, nodding towards the bruise with a smile on my face.
"Eccedentesiast" I thought to myself Stan nodded and held his hand out to me causing me to give him a confused look "as if I'm just gonna let you sit here, come on we're going to play chicken fight. You can go on my shoulders" he spoke, I grabbed his hand and stood up as he went under the water, signalling me to get on his shoulders and I did so, blushing madly the whole time.
As he began making his way over to the others I could see Richie on Ben's shoulders, upon seeing me Richie playfully glared at me at pointed at me "your going down" he spoke, I laughed and grabbed onto his hands "sure you will Richard" I teased and he began pushing me, I squealed and quickly pushed him back, eventually he lost balance and fell back, I yelled in victory and threw my hands up as Stan cheered along with me, I slid off his shoulders and gave him a high five "we make a great team" I spoke as I smiled at him, he blushed a bit "yeah. We really do." he replied and smiled at me.
Me and Beverly were laying on our backs, her mini radio playing "bust a move" by young MC. I had my eyes closed and was once again, thinking of Stan when Beverly lightly nudged my side and I looked over at her "they're staring " she whispered, I let out a little laugh "on three?" I whispered back "1..." "2..." "3..." we both whispered as we both looked up causing all the boys to quickly look away and act distracted, I rolled onto my stomach and laughed as Richie began looking through Ben's bag.
"news flash Ben, schools out for summa'!" he spoke, pretending to be a Australian news reporter "oh that... that's not school stuff" Ben replied. Richie pulled out a postcard "who sent you this?" he asked as he began to briefly examine it before Ben snatched it out of his hands and stuffed it back into his bag "no one" he mumbled, Richie pulled out a blue file and opened it "what's with the history project" "Oh well, when I first moved here, I really didn't have anyone to hang out with so I just started spending time in the library." Ben answered, I felt really bad for him, he seems to be a really nice kid and no one really seemed to really give him a chance
"you went to the library?" Richie started, glancing at all of us then back to Ben "on purpose?!" He continued. Beverly began getting up "ooh, I wanna see" she spoke, sitting next to Bill as he glanced at her a few times before speaking up "Y-y-y-y-your hair.." he began, only to be cut off by Ben "your hair looks beautiful Beverly" it was only then I had noticed how she'd cut her hair, she really pulled it off and still looked as beautiful "oh, yeah thanks" she replied. Bill looked down at the file he was passed, sad he didn't get to finish his sentence due to his stutter.
I sighed and walked over to stand between Richie and Stan, the only place that was empty. Stan's cheeks flushed red as he looked over at me and smiled, I smiled back and looked down at the file that had been passed back to Richie "why's it all murders and missing kids?" I questioned "Derry's not like any town 've ever been in before. They did a study once... it turns out people die or disappear six times the national average." Ben answered, looking around at all our worried expressions "you read that?" Beverly nervously questioned "that's just grown ups.... kids are worse, way, way worse. I've got more stuff if you wanna see it?" Ben continued, all of us agreed except Eddie who seemed to be most nervous of us all from this.
As we arrived at Ben's house he quickly threw his bike down and ran in before us, the others following after him as my attention was drawn towards a woman who put up a new missing poster, curious I slowly walked towards it, a slight gasp leaving my mouth as a picture of Patrick Hockstetter and his name and info below "Lyds, are you coming?" Stan asked from the balcony of Bens house, I looked up at him and the poster once more before turning to him "yeah, yeah sorry..." I mumbled and walked into the house.
We all made our way up to Bens room, Eddie and Richie's rambling coming to a stop as we looked around at the countless pictures and newspaper clippings around his room, I stood in the middle and slowly span around "woah..." I mumbled, completely shocked "cool, huh?" Ben asked "no, nothing cool. There's nothing cool. Well this is cool, wait, no it's not." Richie spike as he pointed at things on the wall, Ben looked down disappointedly as I stood beside Beverly to see what she was looking at "what's that?" I could hear Stan question, I didn't turn around as I took my time looking over each piece of paper on the walls.
"That? That's the charter for Derry Township" Ben answered "nerd alert!" Richie exclaimed "actually, it's really interesting" Ben defended before continuing "Derry started out as a beaver training camp" "still is am I right boys?" Richie attempted to joke, holding his hand up for a high five from Stan, only to receive an eye roll from me and Beverly and Stan nodding his head in disapproval "Ninety-one people signed the charter that made Derry. But later that winter, they all disappeared without a trace." Ben stated "the entire camp?" Eddie nervously questioned "There were rumors of Indians... but no sign of an attack. Everyone thought it was a plague or something. But it's like... one day everybody just woke up and left. The only clue was a trail of clothes leading to the well-house." Ben continued.
A soft giggle escaped my mouth as Beverly pushed back Bens door to reveal a New Kids on the Block poster, Ben turned to us and gave us a pleading look, asking us not to mention it. I smiled and nodded as Beverly closed the door and I moved over towards where Richie, Stan, Eddie and Ben were standing, only for my eyes to land on a certain missing poster and newspaper clippings beside it.
The boys talking beside me became muffled as I stared at the poster, the photo of my dad, smiling at the camera as he held a young me at his side bringing tears to my eyes. I looked over at the newspapers with photos of my fathers car and flashbacks began running through my head
"Okay sweetie I won't be long, I promise" my father spoke as he grabbed his keys and kissed my forehead
"How long?" I questioned, looking at the time and my no where near done art project
"Hmmm... two minutes" my father replied, laughing as I handed him his pocket watch
"If you're even a second late you don't get leftover chocolate cake..." I replied as I playfully glared at him
"Oooh, dont wanna miss that!" My father exclaimed as he ran to his car and got in.
I laughed to myself as I closed the door and walked back to the sitting room, waiting for the arrival of my dad that, of course, would never come.
"Lyds?" Richies voice questioned, breaking me out of my thoughts. I quickly wiped the tears that had fallen and turned to look at him, he looked up at the poster and his face softened as he realised what I was looking at "oh, Lyds. Ben didn't know and I didn't see it before-" Richie began but I cut him off "I'm sorry, I need to go.. I forgot I have to uh be somewhere" I shakily spoke before I ran out of the room and downstairs.
I could hear the others following behind me and calling my name or Ben questioning what I had seen but I didn't stop. As I tried to get on my bike my bag slid off my shoulders and onto the pavement "shit!" I mumbled as my sobs slowly could not be held back anymore "Lyds! Lydia, wait up!" Stanley called out, him being in front of the group, I quickly grabbed my bag and threw it on my back before hopping on my bike "just.. leave me alone okay? I need a second alone..." I called out to them all as I rode away.
Not realising I had dropped my book in the process,
or it had been lifted up by a member of the losers club
and how my secrets, wouldn't be secrets for much longer...