It's funny how something that used to be so awful and detrimental to survival turned into something so freeing.
Tanner, who had multiple last names and no last name at all, had spent three years running for her life. If she ever stopped, ever got too relaxed, it didn't end well. And when she was finally freed from her waking nightmare?
All she wanted to do was run.
But since there was nothing chasing behind her, she had to run on a track instead.
It boggled her mind that there were awards and tournaments for running, but there she was on the shared Hawkins track despite the light dust of snow from the night before, and she was blowing everyone out of the water.
It had only been a week since she had been cleared to run for the first time in months, and it came back just as natural as breathing.
She was happy to find that her priorities in life were friends, school, and making the track team instead trying not to be eaten by monsters.
Coach Barker could've sworn he had just started the mile timer, yet there Tanner was in front of him, barely breaking a sweat as she crossed the finish line. He blinked several times, considering the brunette dressed in pants and a long sleeve unlike the other runners decked in shorts and t-shirts. "I, uh...wow. Wow, Byers."
Tanner grinned wide as the mild statured man held up his hand, high fiving him. She let out a light breath as she rested her hands on her hips, blowing a loose strand of hair from her face.
Both Tanner and Coach Barker took a pause, looking back to the track where several team hopefuls were pressed for breath and still had at least a lap to go.
"I don't even know what to say," Barker told her, adjusting his IU baseball cap. "I mean, hurdles, long distance, long jump, pole vault, all of it was incredible from you."
"Are there any other events?" she asked, stretching her legs for good measure.
Barker's brows shot up. "You want more? Good lord, girl. Everyone else here is pissed at me from how much I'm putting them through just for tryouts. I mean, you're not even sweating."
"I guess it's just a good day for me," she deflected in reply, unsure of what else she could possibly say.
Thanks, I was raised in a lab.
Thanks, I used to run for my life but now I just run for fun.
Thanks, I have superpowers.
"Well, if you have a lot of good days, you're looking at nationals." Coach Barker tucked his clipboard under his arm before offering a hand out to her. "Welcome to the team, Tanner."
Tanner's grin grew wide, her heart pulsating at a triumphant pace. "Thank you so much, Coach," she said, shaking his hand excitedly.
"No, thank you," Barker replied with a soft laugh. "We might have a decent shot at some trophies this season." He sighed, eyes returning to the track where dozens of bodies were struggling to keep up a jog to finish their final lap. "Maybe." He jabbed a thumb over his shoulder. "Grab a uniform and meet here Monday after school."
Nearly ready to dance, Tanner turned on a dime and went to the large cardboard box marked 'women's'.
Tanner's fluttering heart dropped clear out of happiness and into anxiety, pulling out a tiny pair of running shorts. "Oh no," she quietly said, digging through the heap of green and yellow clothes.
Tank tops, running shorts. Tank, shorts.
"Way to hustle, guy!" Coach Barker cheered, clapping a hand against his clipboard. "You can do it! Finish strong!"
Although Tanner leafed out a track set in her size, she hesitantly approached Barker. "Quick question, Coach," she meekly said, clearing her throat. "Are there...longer uniforms?"
Would she quit if he said no?
She would have to, wouldn't she?
Coach turned toward her, eyes flickering between Tanner and the track to mark times for the runners just beginning to come in. "Uh, no, those are pretty much standard uniforms."
It wasn't hard to notice Tanner was the only one not in shorts and short-sleeves in a group of nearly forty.
"I can't get you a special uniform, but you're welcome to wear something like you have on now underneath it." He scrawled several times down, the ink barely legible. "Is it a religious thing?"
Tanner shrugged mildly, bouncing the uniform between her hands. "Yeah, something like that."
"As long as you can run in something that says Hawkins, it works for me. Good job today, kid. Get some rest."
The pep in her step softly returned as she backed up, hopping onto the bleachers to grab her duffle bag. She smiled to herself as she dropped her uniform inside, swinging the strap over her shoulder for the walk back.
Thankfully, Nancy was willing to ride home with Jonathan so Tanner could make tryouts.
And with Tanner successfully making the team, it was convenient in her plot to make Jonathan and Nancy talk now that she couldn't drive Nancy home every other day of the week.
Unintentional, but welcome in Tanner's eyes.
Tanner took the dirt steps leading back up to the high school two at a time, likely making anyone else from tryouts who saw her energy cringe as they struggled to breathe. She let her hair down from a high pony, shaking out the long dark mess as she crossed into the parking lot.
Maybe normal life really was doable.
High school, homework, friends, track team.
"Tanner!"
Turning over her shoulder just shy of her Jeep, Tanner spotted a sweaty Steve Harrington emerging from the main gym.
"You look like a spy," he mused as he jogged to her in his practice gear. His hair lacked the height it often had, but bounced none the less.
Tanner's brows furrowed slightly, trying not to laugh. "Thanks? They're for running."
"Running!" His eyes shot open. "How did tryouts go?" He evaluated her lack of sweat and he tossed his hands up. "What, did you even run?"
Tanner produced the track jersey from her bag, a roaring tiger printed smack in the middle. "I finished first and nearly left Coach speechless."
"Congrats! I knew you would make it. And your ribs didn't bother you?"
"Nope, I am perfectly healed." She was grinning ear to ear, thrilled just by the concept of getting to run in circles for two and a half months. "Coach is even letting me wear leggings and long sleeves under the uniform. That way I'll look less like a spy."
Although he was smiling simply from the happiness radiating off of Tanner, his brow quirked. "Why would you need to?"
He didn't see you in the hospital, she thought. "Oh, uh," she readjusted the strap over her shoulder as she glanced around, "I brought back a few things from the Upside Down. They don't exactly go away."
It took a long pause for Steve to connect the dots, considering the fact he hadn't seen her in anything but pants and long sleeves. He had written it off with the fact that it had been cold the entire time she had been back on the right side of the universe.
"Oh."
She smiled softly. "Yeah."
Steve stared down at his feet for a brief moment, biting his tongue. "Like scars and stuff?"
It was when she nodded that his heart visibly broke, but it only came out as nod itself.
"They don't hurt," she hastily assured as she registered Steve's expression. "I barely even notice them anymore. They're just not nice for other people to look at. And I can't exactly explain them away, so I just keep them covered." She wiggled up one of her sleeves, revealing not only the '010' inked on her skin, but several raised claws marks slashed so deep that they would never fade.
Steve's eyes widened but his brows furrowed. "They're all over your body?"
Nodding as she lowered the sleeve back down, she shrugged. "It's not a big deal."
"Not a big deal? Tan, you really don't have to act like –"
Tanner laughed lightly to herself, holding up a hand. "Easy, tiger. I appreciate the spirit of not letting me forget who I am, but I genuinely don't really acknowledge the scars. They're just there, like the tattoo. I just stopped paying attention to them."
"I learn something new about you every day."
"Nothing tops the superpowers, though, huh?" she asked with a soft grin. "You really couldn't wrap your mind around that one."
"I still have a hard time believing it."
The Jeep behind Tanner revved to life despite the fact she was only just removing the keys from her bag. "Believe what you want, Harrington."
Steve's jaw slacked as he looked between the keys and the car. "I..."
Tanner shrugged, the driver's side door opening itself before she reached for the handle and tossed her duffle bag inside. "If you snitch, I get thrown back in the lab," she warned, pointing a finger in his direction.
Still attempting to figure out what he had just witnessed, he fumbled over his words. "Wait, what?"
"Let's save that one for another day," Tanner told him.
Steve's brows pulled in. "Why?"
"You're going to run out of things to learn about me if I tell you everything now." She went up on her toes and cupped her eyes as she looked towards the middle school. "I thought they'd be out by now."
"Who?"
"They boys," she replied, leaning against the car as the engine warmed. "They have AV club today so I'm taking Will home. We all kind of swapped car schedules because of tryouts."
Steve nodded mildly. "So, Jonathan takes Nance and Will home on most days now because you made the team?"
Tanner hummed in reply, eyes dashing across his face in an attempt to evaluate him registering the information, and she was greatly surprised.
She had expected to see soft annoyance or concern, but he seemed perfectly neutral.
"Hey, have you studied for our history test next week?" he asked, folding his arms over his chest to block out the early March cold. His body was screaming to run to his car for warmth, but he couldn't bring himself to leave quite yet.
"The Civil War one? Barely," she replied with a soft shrug, casting often glances towards the middle school. "I know a handful of it, but a lot less than I would prefer."
"Do you want to study some time? Maybe Monday after practice?" It was evident that he was trying to play it cool, but his eyes were hopeful. "I mean, it'll probably be you teaching me most of it, but I can provide snacks and music."
Tanner laughed softly, nodding. "Sure, that sounds great."
"There's Tan!"
"Is that Steve?"
"Here come the mongrels," Tanner said with a grin, lifting off of the hood of the running Jeep. Without much of a pause, another engine spiked to life in the parking lot despite no other drivers nearby.
Steve's eyes narrowed, turning over his shoulder as the clicking of bike pedals neared. "Did you..." He found his BMW parked not too far away, fog coming out of the exhaust pipe to signal it was awaiting his arrival. He knew better than anyone that his keys were still in his pocket.
"You're freezing your ass off." She nodded towards the red vehicle. "Go warm up. I'll see you Monday."
Steve waved a hand in parting, turning over his shoulder and heading for his car.
Mike was first to skid to a halt in front of Tanner's Jeep, his eyes squinted as he watched Steve. "What was he doing here?"
"He goes to school here?" Tanner's brows lifted, glancing between the group as Lucas and Dustin rode up, Will up on the pegs of the latter. "How was A/V club?"
"Now you're just trying to distract us," Dustin claimed as Will hopped off the back of his bike. "What are you doing hanging out with Steve?"
"Boy, are you guys judgey," she said. "He's a friend. And he was so kind as to congratulate me for making the track team, but you four are too preoccupied to-"
"You made it?" Lucas' face of judgement faltered into a wide smile, clapping his freezing hands together despite the stinging it brought.
Tanner grinned wide as Will roped her into a hug, allowing herself to enjoy the cheers in her honor. "Thank you, thank you," she dramatically said, waving her hands as if she were at an award show. "Thank you so much."
"You're going to blow everyone out of the water," Mike praised.
The brunette's eyes narrowed as a handful of other compliments were flung her way, not noticing Steve's beemer nearly skid out of the parking lot. "Hang on, you three are being too nice."
All but Will exchanged confused looks, overcompensating significantly.
"What? No!"
Tanner sighed. "What do you guys want?"
Lucas pulled his arms in tight, one leg still over his bike as he forced his body into a full shiver. "It's just... so cold outside."
"And we're so small," Mike chittered, his pale complexion working in his favor. "So thin and frail."
"Christ," she mumbled, waving a hand over her shoulder. "Bikes on the rack, let's go."
All of the boys' jaws fell to the floor, momentarily forgetting the vicious wind chill.
"Bike rack?"
Tanner held a subdued grin, rounding the back of the Jeep and motioning for them to follow. "I knew you brats would want rides home and I'm not letting you scratch the interior by jamming the bikes out the back." She undid the metal contraption surrounding the spare tire, hoisting up each of the three bikes into secure slots. "Hop inside you cold, frail children."
"You're the best!" Dustin shouted, practically dancing his way into the backseat of the Jeep. "Shit, it's so nice in here."
"Move your ass," Lucas whined as he shouldered his way through to the back.
Happily claiming his reserved front seat, Will ignored the fact that the car was running before Tanner ever put the keys into the ignition and instead reveled in the heat blasting from the vents.
"Just how long have you had the bike rack?" Dustin asked, resting his chin on the back of the driver's seat to catch the heater and thaw his face.
Tanner raised a hand over her shoulder, poking a finger into his forehead and forcing him back. "I can still kick you out of the car if you're going to be ungrateful."
Dustin held up his hands innocently as Mike yanked him back. "Nope, nope. Perfectly happy. Thank you for not making us bike home in the cold."
"However-"
Tanner groaned as Lucas piped up from the back, wheeling out of the nearly empty parking lot with ease.
"The Steve thing is still bothering me."
"What is wrong with you guys?" she whined. "Why can't you accept that I'm just friends with him? We're in the same grade and most of the same classes."
"Because he's Steve Harrington," Mike protested. "He's an asshole."
Tanner's eyes flickered across the boys in the back through the rearview mirror. "You guys really don't think that people can change? That you can fight monsters and it doesn't change how you respond to the world?" She held off a smile as the Jeep fell silent, earning begrudging nods from the middle schoolers as she pulled up to the first stop.
Only simple conversation continued as each of the party members were dropped off at their houses, the car falling into genuine quiet when it was down to just Will in the front seat.
And it didn't take long for Tanner to notice that he was staring.
"You were quiet that whole time," she said, keeping her eyes on the road as they neared home. "What's your take?"
"When we were...over there," Will paused to stare at his hands, "you said that you had a dream."
Tanner hummed absently.
"And over there, dreams mean real things that are going to happen."
"At a seemingly successful rate, yes."
Will hesitated, biting his bottom lip as the Jeep barreled over a dust of snow still clinging to the ground for dear life. "You told me that you dreamed about a boy...with big hair."
Tanner squinted. "Okay."
"And that he drove a red car."
"Will-"
"Tan, I'm not accusing you of anything," he quickly defended, holding up his hands. "I'm just going to point out the fact that you had a dream, which is bound to come true, about a boy with big hair and a red car, and Steve Harrington happens to match that description."
Her lips pursed as she stared out the windshield, slowly rolling into the driveway of the Byers house. "The dream could be a fluke."
Will's brows rose. "Do you actually believe that?"
"Even if I did like him, he's Nancy's ex-boyfriend." Tanner killed the engine of the Jeep, both Jonathan and Joyce's cars scattered in the front yard. "It's girl code, or something like that. You don't date your friend's exes."
"And what magazine did you read that in?" Will asked.
"A very reliable one!"
Will sighed, shaking his head as the laughter trickled away. "You'd tell me, wouldn't you?"
Tanner scoured Will's eyes as his expression drew very genuine, serious in a way most twelve-year-olds weren't capable of. "Of course I would."
"Because you can tell me anything," he assured. "I mean that. With everything we've been through, you can tell me anything."
"I know," Tanner replied with a smile, pinching Will's cheek across the center console. "And I love you for that."
Will slinked out of the passenger's seat of the Jeep, a warm smile cemented on his face as he bounced towards the house.
You can tell me anything.
"Eleven's alive," she softly said, eyes closing as the front door of the house swung shut, no one else in sight. "She's in Hopper's cabin. That's where I go instead of studying with Robin."
Silence greeted her in turn, nothing but the settling of the Jeep's engine matching her secrets. Just so, they remained.
Secrets.
Secrets to live under the surface and slowly suffocate her until she couldn't take it.