Charlie came over, precariously balancing his stack of toast as well as Tonks's, and his own bowl of porridge, piled high with even more berries. "What're you doin' leaving me alone at Hufflepuff and coming over here?" he demanded, elbowing over a firstie that had been about to sit at the bench across from the shabby man. The first year took one look at Charlie, squeaked, and moved down the bench hurriedly. Charlie pushed Tonks's toast across the table. "From now on, we start off at Gryffindor, pinkie," he said, "You get distracted too easily, then everybody's looking at me like I'm the mad one, sitting at the wrong house table."
"As if anybody even notices you!" Tonks replied, sticking out her tongue. Then, in an important tone, she added, "Charlie. This is Remus Lupin."
Charlie waved. "Hi."
"Gods you've gotten big," Remus said, eyes widening. "Should've known exactly who you are, with red hair like that, though, I reckon."
Charlie looked confused, but said, "Yeah - Weasley hair. What are you, an old school friend of dad's?"
Remus smiled sadly. Did he really look older enough to be mistaken for Arthur Weasley's age, when Arthur had been old enough to be married and already have the two kids when Remus was just starting at Hogwarts? "More of your Uncle, Bilius's, actually."
Charlie's eyes lit up. "You knew Bilius?"
Remus nodded, "Yeah, he was prefect the year I came to Hogwarts. Good man, Bilius. I miss him dearly."
Charlie nodded, "Yeah, me, too."
Tonks was looking between Remus and Charlie as though there were a fierce Quidditch match happening. But at this, she grabbed Remus's hand in hers and said, "I've really missed you, Remus. You never come over anymore to visit me."
Remus said, "I'm sorry. I thought now that you were grown you wouldn't be needing a babysitter any longer."
"You could come just to hang out," Tonks suggested eagerly.
Remus smiled.
Charlie looked over at Tonks. "How come I never get to just come over to hang out?" he asked around a mouthful of toast.
"Because your house is more fun," Tonks answered Charlie impatiently.
Charlie shrugged. "It'd be nice to get away from all the siblings, is all I'm saying." He turned back to focus on his porridge.
"So what do you say, Remus, will you come hang out with me sometime?" Tonks pressed eagerly.
"We'll see, perhaps one day," Remus said gently, and his mind flitted to Dumbledore using the exact same phrase upstairs about keeping his CV on file and Remus felt rather as though both things had precisely the same odds of coming true. He took a spoonful of the porridge he had magicked back into his bowl, and sipped a cup of black coffee.
Tonks was sitting side-ways on the bench, straddling it, facing him, with abject admiration plain on her face. Charlie raised an eyebrow and smirked at her, then looked down before Remus Lupin could spot him smirking at Tonks.
"Well... well, we'll eat breaky with you at least," Tonks said, sitting normally beside Remus now, swinging her leg over the bench. She grabbed a bit of toast, chewed quickly on the bite she'd pushed into her mouth, then swallowed and said, "I've missed you so much, though, you know, that's all. It's been ages."
"Three years," Remus corrected her.
"Three years," Tonks emphasized. "You say it like that's nothing."
"When you're as old as I am, it is," Remus replied.
"You're not old," Tonks said firmly.
Remus chuckled, "I'm twice your age."
"You're not," Tonks said.
Charlie looked up. He was surprised Remus was only that much older. What's he been through? he wondered, and then he quickly looked back down for in his head he'd heard Molly's voice yelling at him not to stare at people. He looked down the table to see where the basket of Gryffindor's berries were. "Be right back," he muttered and got up to go after them.
Tonks wasn't touching her toast again. She just watched Remus as he ate his breakfast slowly, wincing each time he leaned forward, his bones audibly cracking if he leaned too far. She hesitated, then, "What have you been doing the last three years?"
Remus muttered something about odd jobs, but didn't really look her in the eyes as he said it.
"I thought you were going to be a teacher?" she asked.
"Seems nobody is hiring."
"Bullocks! Dumbledore's hired three new DADA teachers since I've been here --"
"Not in the middle of a term," Remus replied.
Tonks said, "I'd bloody love it if you were our next DADA teacher." Her voice was eager.
Remus smiled, but it was weak and it did not reach his eyes.
"Hey, before Charlie and I came over, we were talking about holiday. We leave today on the Express, you know, to go home for two whole weeks!"
Remus said, "Ah, Christmas holiday. You're not staying at Hogwarts, then?"
She shook her head, "Mum won't let me. Says Christmas holiday is nearly the only time she gets to see me. Charlie, too. His mum needs help with the little kids, see, so him and Bill always go home at holiday. To give their parents a break, I s'pose."
"That's very nice of them," Remus said.
"I'm good and ready for the break, though, I swear - Transfiguration is such a frustrating class! I hate it."
Remus looked surprised, "I should think a metamorphmagus would do well at it."
Tonks shook her head, her eyes wide, "Oh nooo," she murmured, "Not at all. But everyone thinks that, you know. So I always get loads of questions from the others, like if I'm so good at changing my nose, then why can't I change a change purse to a porcupine." She dragged her hands across her cheeks dramatically. "It's nooooot the saaaame."
Remus laughed. "I guess you're right, it isn't. My old school mate James Potter is --" he stopped mid-sentence for several long beats, then, "...he was good at Transfiguration."
Tonks, of course, knew all about James Potter. Everyone did. Him and Lily Potter, and of course her cousin, that terrible Sirius Black (may he rot in Azkaban, as he deserved), and the Dark Lord... She knew Remus had been mates with them before everything happened, and she felt quite terrible. Especially when she saw the distant, sort of expressionless look on Remus Lupin's tired face.
Wanting to cheer him up, she asked, "What are you doing for the holiday?"
Remus took several moments before his face rearranged itself from the emptiness. He blinked and looked at Tonks. "What?"
"What are you doing for Christmas?" Tonks asked a second time.
Remus thought a moment, then shrugged, "Nothing much."
"Are you going home for the holiday? Travelling abroad?"
Remus shook his head.
"Traveling... un-abroad?"
Remus wiped his mouth with a napkin, then pushed his bowl away and it disappeared with a POP. He glanced around the Great Hall, eyes taking in the banners high in the rafters. "I'm really sorry, Nymphadora, I've got to go."
He was the only person she allowed to call her Nymphadora in the whole wide world.
"But - but we just started talking and --"
Remus lifted his ratty old briefcase up from the floor. "I'm very sorry."
Tonks sighed and said, "Alright."
He reached down and lifted her chin up with his fingers. He stared into her eyes, searching them a moment. "Just because we aren't spending as much time together doesn't mean that I don't care about you a whole lot. You're a really funny and brave little girl and I hope you know that. You're very bright."
Tonks smiled. "Yeah?"
"Yes. You remind me an awful lot of --" he stopped again mid-sentence, and shook his head, "Well, I suppose you would, being his family and all... but nothing really alike in the end, are you?" He was talking mostly to himself more than to her.
"Who?" Tonks asked.
Remus shook his head, "Never you mind." He withdrew his hand from her chin. "Be good. Study hard. Stay bright, whatever darkness comes your way." He checked the handle on his briefcase was secured, then turned and walked away. He could feel Tonks's eyes on him the entire way out of the Great Hall.
She picked at her toast.
"Where'd Mr. Lupin go?" Charlie asked, returning with the entire basket of berries he'd just taken from the other end of the table.
"He had to leave," Tonks replied. Then, "He seemed really sad, don't you think?"
Charlie replied, "Yeah." He shoveled berries into his mouth.
Tonks sighed, turning back from having stared after Remus, and saw Charlie's chin was purple with blueberry juice. She laughed.
"What?" he asked, "Oh bugger, did I get some on my face? Where?"
"Just... there," Tonks tapped her chin and Charlie wiped it - missing more than half of the purple stain. "Did I get it all?"
Tonks smirked, "Yeah, good as new."