"i can't believe november is already almost over." luke said absentmindedly; his attention more focused on the punching bag in front of him.
this time, lola had visited him while he was training- driving straight there from her own class.
she lay on the bench, luke's hoodie laying beneath her so it didn't hurt her back to much, legs stretched up in the air, swaying ever so slightly.
every so often, luke would glance away from the worn leather of the punching bag, a warm feeling spreading over his chest at the sight of the idle smile on lola's face as she flexed and pointed her feet.
"yeah." lola mused, stretching her legs out into a splits before letting them fall and dangle to the floor. "i'm so excited for christmas though."
"yeah?"
"yeah." she sat upright, with a smile on her face that was sweeter than luke felt he deserved when his knuckles were tearing through leather.
lola let her head loll to the side as she continued to watch luke, an unintentional smile pulling at her lips at the sight of luke's muscles flexing with every move he made; the sickly yellow tinge in the light doing nothing to detract from the ethereal way his pale skin still managed to glow beneath it.
"what are you looking at?" luke's playful taunt pulled lola from her daze, and she felt a dark flush cover her cheeks as his eyes surveyed her closely, a smirk that held way more than a hint of cockiness on his face; fingers working to unwrap the tape on his knuckles almost tauntingly.
too flustered to even try thinking of a reply, lola ducked her head down to try and hide the blush on her cheeks and mumbled a weak "stop" as luke made his way over to her.
cooing at the shy smile that he'd elicited from his girlfriend, luke reached out to cup her cheek, bringing her head up to face him and ran his thumb over her lips before kissing them with an equal gentleness.
"let's go home now sweetheart."
***
lola's living room was bathed in a multitude of softly glowing colours, each casting a small, saturated halo across her photos and furniture; making the room feel somehow more cosy than it had before.
long strings of multi-coloured christmas lights were entangled not only around the tree stuffed into the corner of the room, but around the whole perimeter of the room itself; obscuring the faces in family photos until they were just bright and blurred.
the tree itself was taller than luke - which he hadn't expected - and every single inch of it was covered in glittery, christmassy mess that felt so unfamiliar to luke and yet so so right.
he'd never seen a tree sparkle so much.
he'd also never seen the christmas sweater that had been hidden at the back of lola's drawers; a questionably large knitted sweater with strangely hypnotic reindeer and snowflake patterns that hurt luke's eyes if he looked at her for too long - which he did not like.
the catalyst to lola's frenzied festive decorating was a single glimpse at a house on the drive home that was covered in christmas lights.
with her face pressed up against the cool glass, her breaths just almost obscuring her view, lola all but screamed at luke to slow down so she could properly appreciate the battered, inflatable santa on the front lawn - which luke found absolutely terrifying, though he didn't admit it.
radiating pure ecstasy, lola became a whirlwind of inhuman speed once they'd arrived back at her apartment, showering and changing into her christmas sweater before luke even had time to comprehend what was going on - then, without even knowing what he'd gotten himself into, he'd agreed to help her decorate her apartment.
and honestly, luke didn't even like christmas.
the whole ordeal of it actually made him feel kind of sick to his stomach.
it made him feel cold and nostalgic for something he wasn't sure why he missed - luke usually spent that whole time of year on autopilot until the spring came around again and it was safe to connect with the world.
so no, luke didn't really like christmas, or trees, or reindeer or lights.
but he loved lola more than anything.
seeing the smile on her face and the way the coloured lights reflected in her eyes made luke's heart beat harder, and feeling the soft knit of her sweater when she wrapped her arms around him, or the tiny wobble as she balanced on his shoulders to place the star upon the tree - something about that made christmas feel safe for luke.
he leaned on the kitchen counter, holding a mug of tea with both hands and watching lola through the steam as she peeked into the oven to see if the gingerbread had finished cooking yet.
luke had never smelled gingerbread before.
when lola found that out, part of her wanted to burst into tears on the spot and apologise for a few hours for unintentionally bringing luke's lost childhood to attention - but she was also aware that would probably just make the whole situation much worse.
instead, she stood on her tiptoes to kiss him gently before breaking a piece of gingerbread off and pushing it between his lips; watching fondly as luke's eyebrows furrowed as he contemplated the taste.
"it's nicer than i expected it to be." was his final verdict.
lola rolled her eyes teasingly, breaking herself off a piece and crunching it happily.
"you and your lack of a sweet tooth. have faith in my baking!"
"i do!" luke whined playfully, putting his mug on the countertop and leaning down to wrap his arms around lola, resting his chin on the top of her curls. "i just don't get why you made them in such a weird shape. aren't they meant to be people."
"but if we're going to make gingerbread people shouldn't we give them a house to live in?" lola pulled back, resting her chin on luke's chest like she so often did and smiling at him; the type of smile that made him feel like he was watching the sun rise behind her eyes.
so he let her teach him how to make the same icing her mother had taught her to make years ago; the type that dries and holds its shape, so the house wouldn't fall apart around the little gingerbread family.
he let her guide his hands as they both clumsily lined the edge of the gingerbread with the startlingly white icing and quickly pushed the other 'wall' into it before it dried, using shot glasses - which lola, for whatever reason, had a shocking amount of - to hold the structure upright.
and then, almost an hour later, when they could finally be sure the house would stay upright by itself, he let her spell their matching initials on either side of the sloped roof in the leftover icing punctuated by smarties; their gingerbread house.
luke couldn't deny the strange calmness that baking seemed to bring him - despite this being the first time he'd ever tried it.
"look at you, you're a natural!" lola cheered, watching from her position perched on the countertop as luke rolled the dough out across the floured surface, unable to bite back her smile as she watched a soft blush cover his cheeks.
truthfully, luke had never felt like he was a natural at anything except boxing. and boxing wasn't exactly the nicest thing to be a natural at.
all it really was was hurting other people before they hurt you.
"baby." luke spoke as if he were asking a question, though he wasn't quite sure yet where his words were taking him.
"yeah?"
"how do you...feel about me boxing?"
lola tilted her head in confusion, watching as luke avoided her gaze.
she didn't quite know what to say, because truthfully, lola didn't actually know how she felt about luke boxing.
of course, she knew how much it meant to him - it was his outlet; when he couldn't talk, he fought and that made things easier for him. lola didn't want to feel like she was taking that away from him, but god if it didn't terrify her.
the blood on his hands, the cuts on his lip, the faint scar that stayed to serve as a chilling reminder of the night spent in hospital when she'd never felt so powerless.
luke boxing made her feel scared.
"i don't really know baby? i trust you to know what's best for you - i trust you to take care of yourself out there." she said slowly, choosing every word carefully and watching for luke's reaction.
he considered what she'd said for a moment, and continued to roll the dough until it was the same thickness that lola had rolled it to.
"you love ballet." luke spoke into the silence, his hands almost shaking as he held the cookie cutter. "right?"
"right."
"i don't love boxing." for the first time in the conversation, luke met lola's eye, turning away from the countertop to face her properly. "i don't even like it i-i don't actually think i ever did."
lola's eyebrows knitted together in concern, and she pushed herself off of the counter, landing virtually at luke's feet, reaching up to cup his cheeks.
"baby...you don't have to do it. you know that, right?"
"i have to make money though."
luke had her there.
lola knew better than anyone else that she couldn't protect luke from the reality of the world, and unfortunately the reality was that boxing was luke's entire livelihood.
it was all he'd ever done and he wasn't exactly qualified to do much else. he hadn't finished school and had never had a formal job. they both knew how hard that would make it for him to change careers.
she didn't know what to say, so she stood on her tiptoes and kissed him, hoping that if she couldn't truthfully tell him everything would be okay she could at least make him feel like it was for a moment.
luke leaned into the kiss, pushing his tongue between her lips and wrapping his arms tightly around her waist, the gingerbread men still waiting to be baked on the countertop.
he reached down to brush his hand along the back of her thigh, the signal both of them now understood that indicated lola should jump - and she did, wrapping her legs around his waist and allowing him to walk the short distance to the couch before laying her down gently on it.
their lips disconnected and luke lay his head on her chest, tightening his arms around her waist and closing his eyes as lola began to play idly with his hair.
"i'm sorry i'm being so difficult about this." luke said quietly.
"baby." lola kissed the top of his head gently. "you're not being difficult at all. i like when you talk to me about things like this. and i-i understand if you don't really like boxing."
slowly, luke lifted his head to face her, the remaining sunlight somehow making his eyes appear an even lighter, more ethereal shade of blue and highlighting the vulnerability behind the oceans raging in his irises.
"yeah?"
"yeah. sometimes when you're out there i get so- i get so nervous about what could happen to you."
"you do?"
lola nodded slightly, allowing her fingers to dance through the mass of sunshine curls that hung over luke's forehead.
"you're a lot to lose, luke."
he chose not to respond with words, kissing her instead and bringing his hand up to cup her jaw gently.
she had no idea how much those words meant to him, and he had no idea how to tell her, but in his lifetime of feeling expendable, luke had never truly believed he meant something to people until he'd met lola.
"hey." the word was muffled between their lips, but was enough for luke to notice and pull back; but only barely.
"what are you doing for christmas?" lola asked softly.
"i don't know?" luke's reply was slow. "what are you doing for christmas sweetheart?"
lola's heart was caught in her throat as she answered.
"well-i thought maybe we could spend it at my parents? they've invited us?" her voice grew quieter until it fizzled out on the last few words, her cheeks growing red at the fact she'd revealed that her parents wanted to meet luke - and they really wanted to meet luke - which meant that she'd also revealed she'd been talking about him to them.
luke swallowed, not expecting the offer at all - least of all an invite from her parents, who he'd never even met.
honestly it sounded scary to luke.
family christmases were nothing more than a faint memory that felt more like a dream to him at that point, and the holiday time still made him feel uneasy.
but the hope that was so evident in her velvet eyes won him over like it always did, so luke nodded and kissed her cheek.
"that sounds really nice baby."
the fact it's been a month i'm SO SORRY
i've been so bad at timekeeping recently but i really want to get this fic wrapped up soon because lola and luke DESERVE IT but lowkey i don't want to let go of them lmaoooo
also thank fuck biden won
STAY SAFE & LOVE ALWAYS