Chapter 21
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Nagkasundo kami nina Kal at Jareth na tutulong nga ako sa pag-track doon sa babaeng nabuntis niya. The tracking was what made me busy for the past week before the wedding. Habang sila ay busy sa kasal, ako ay nasa bahay at maghapong nakaharap sa computer at nakikipaglaban sa mga CCTV footages. The first one being from the Lacsamana's mansion when the mystery woman left baby Jasper by the gate. I could say that she was smart, she wore a black face mask so her face wasn't visible from the footage. Siguro ay alam niyang may possibility na ipahanap siya ng mga Lacsamana.
Nasundan ko ang babae thru the cameras. She rode a taxi outside the subdivision until she entered this establishment. I followed her until she rode a jeepney and it went to a place with no more cameras I could hack to see a footage.
It was a dead-end. But dead ends weren't the end for me, it was only where the fun started.
I've gathered... stuff. Hindi ko sure kung of importance or what. It confused me, actually. Those answers I found seemed to just branch out into more questions. Parang imbis na one straight path lang palapit sa tamang tao ay kung ano ano pang streets ang lumilitaw na dahilan para lumiko kami. I wasn't complainig even a bit though, I was actually enjoying the chase.
I actually wanted it to be longer than necessary. It was quite a while since I've encountered a chase like this. Feeling ko detective ako na naghahabol sa isang serial killer.
"You're still busy with that?" Caspian asked, his voice still thick from sleep. Nakadapa siya sa kama ko at kakagising lamang.
I nodded as an answer but I didn't bother speaking, my full attention was focused on a medical record. Which I acquired illegally as most of the confidential stuff I found out.
One day, siguro ay sa kulungan nga talaga ako dadamputin sa rami ng mga ilegal na information na nahahanap ko.
Hindi na rin naman sumagot si Caspian. Alam niya na ang ibig kong sabihin sa pananahimik ko. He knew better than disturb me while I was tracking. Besides, nakulit na ako niyan kanina. Pinilit ako na sa laptop ko na lang ituloy ang pag track since may program din naman ako dito. Pumayag na lang ako because I was afraid he would scold my ear off. Lecturan ba naman ako nang negative effects of radiation as if naman di ko 'yun alam.
"Alam mo naman pala, e. Bakit di ka natatakot para sa mga mata mo?"
Siyempre dahil may anxiety ako, madali lang ako takutin lalo pa't trigger din talaga sa akin ang death about sa health.
I knew too much about how a human body works and the risks it could go thru when not taken care of properly. My knowledge about it was what made me afraid. Kaya alam kong hindi puro positive na bagay ang dala ng pagiging matalino ko.
Caspian stood up from the bed and went in my bathroom. Hinayaan ko ka na siyang gawin ang kung ano mang gagawin niya habang tuloy lang ako sa pagpindot sa keys ng laptop.
Jareth's missing girl was... something. Hindi ko ma-point out kung ano ba 'yung something na 'yun pero... basta. May kakaiba talaga.
So far, I figured out that she was a Cinderella. From rags to riches, typical of families who got lucky and won the lottery. Theirs did and it made sense of how she got the chance of sleeping with Jareth. Which I knew when and where it happened since I also hacked the hotel's CCTV footages archive. Kung madiscover man ng may ari ng hotel na ginalaw ko ang archive nila, siguro naman ay ipapagtanggol ako ni Demi. Pinsan niya naman 'yun. Not that I was afraid of that infamous Montellado devil. Tasahan ko pa sungay niya.
Sayang nga kasi walang CCTV sa loob ng hotel room. Gusto ko sanang malaman ang nangyari sa loob. For research purposes only, of course.
Siyempre gusto kong malaman kung ano bang nangyari at parang kahit 'yung babae ay hindi man lang napansin na may kasama na siya doon at nabuntis pa siya.
Lasing ba sila pareho? Kasi lasing daw si Jareth noon. Worst case scenario was that Jareth forced himself on her. Not that it was on the table to discuss because Jareth was like a wounded lamb and napalaki naman siya nang maayos. But still... the possibility was still there. It could be true considering Jasper's records. Tsaka kahit hindi pa ako isang mommy ay may idea naman ako kung gaano kahirap para sa isang nanay na hindi kasama ang anak... unless ayaw ng nanay sa anak niya in the first place.
That was a common feeling rape victims had para sa mga anak nilang bunga ng kababuyan na ginawa sa kanila.
So it's either si mystery woman ang makukulong o si Jareth. O ako. Pwede ring 'yung babae at ako o si Jareth at ako. Sino na lang sigurong pinakamalas sa amin.
Ako pala ang pinakamalas. Hack pa, self.
Ang nakakapagtaka lang, hindi ko alam kung sino ba talaga. I meant... who would be more worth it to be investigated? The obvious one or the mysterious one?
I guess I needed Jareth's opinion for this. Siya naman ang nakabuntis. Surely, kahit naman siguro hindi niya kilala ang babae ay may idea siya sa pagkatao noon. They shared a bed, wasn't that a given?
I gave out a huff of frustration. Tinanggap ko itong trabaho na 'to because I was challenged, I was finally allowed to give a chance to track someone with a go signal. I was not doing this in a super illegal manner. Medyo lang since the girl doesn't have any idea na meron palang mga taong gustong halukayin ang buhay niya. Plus all the records I've snooped into and all the CCTV footages from both public and private feeds.
It was partly her fault, though. Masyado niyang minaliit ang pamilya ni Jareth. Did she really think she could hide from them? Well, maybe for now. But she couldn't hide forever.
Tsaka hindi niya ba nami-miss ang anak niya? What kind of mother was she that her reason for hiding seemed more important than being with her own child? Mas gusto kong ganito ang isipin kaysa doon sa isang possibility. Mas gusto kong isipin na may malaking dahilan lang siya para iwan ang anak niya kaysa doon sa ayaw niya talaga sa anak niya dahil ginahasa siya.
Jareth wouldn't do that... would he?
Mabilis na umiling ako. Sumasakit na ang ulo ko kaya siguro kung ano ano nang naiisip ko.
Mga babae talagang involved sa mga tagapagmana na 'to, puro mga complicated. Buti na lang ako hindi one of them.
Sucks to be them, huh.
"Quinnzelle?" Tawag ni Caspian na nakatayo at nakasandal sa doorframe. Nag angat ako ng tingin. "Lunch?"
"Okay." I could use a little break, I guess. Inilapag ko sa kama ang laptop pagkatapos kong i-shut down iyon. Binunot ko rin ang saksak ng charger because I was a decent human being who knew how to conserve electricity.
I stood up from the bed and streched my legs and arms a little. Natawa si Caspian sa ginawa ko. He chuckled lightly while I rolled my eyes at him. Inilahad niya ang kamay sa akin nang maglakad ako palapit sa kanya. Inabot ko naman iyon and we held hands on our way to the kitchen.
The food were already set up at the table.
"McDonalds?" Malaki ang ngiti na sabi ko. "You're adjusting well to me now."
"Please." Umirap si Caspian. "Alam na alam ko gusto ng bituka mo. You despise healthy food."
"Parang ikaw hindi, a." Inirapan ko rin siya. Caspian chuckled. We spent a lot of time with each other these days that we almost had the same mannerisms.
Bonus na rin siguro na parehas kami ni Caspian na mahilig sa fast food. Noong nasa ibang bansa pa ako ay hindi matatapos ang isang buong araw na hindi kami kakain ni Iñigo ng fast food, wether it be breakfast, lunch or dinner. Kahit nakabalik na ako sa Pilipinas ay hindi ko na nabago iyon sa sarili ko.
Kahit alam namin ni Caspian pareho na hindi maganda kumain ng fast food, masyado kaming mahilig doon para pigilan ang sarili namin na mag order nang mag order.
Parang relasyon lang namin. Alam namin pareho na hindi healthy but because we both wanted what each other had to offer, we still pushed thru it.
But those were thoughts for next time.
"Gusto mong lumabas bukas?" Caspian asked before he took a bite from his burger. Pangalawang kagat niya pa lang doon pero paubos niya na kaagad. I bet he could finish one burger in one bite. Ang liit naman kasi ng food portions dito sa Pilipinas.
I swallowed my own food first before I tried to answer. Inabutan ako ni Caspian ng soft drink na isinalin niya na sa baso to help me. Ininom ko muna iyon bago pa ako nakasagot.
"To where?" Kunot noo kong tanong. Caspian finished his burger. Lumunok siya at uminom. Hassle talaga mag-usap kapag kumakain.
"May activity lang ang company bukas." He said then sniffled. Lagi kasing naka topless 'tong gago na 'to akala mo di freezing cold dito sa unit ko kaya mukhang sisipunin na.
Mas tumaas ang kilay ko.
"Company activity? Tapos isasama mo ako?" I asked. Ngumuso si Caspian bago siya tumango. He sheepishly scratched the back of his head.
"Wala ka namang gagawin bukas, right?" Tanong niya.
There's this glint in his eyes, like he was desperately hoping I'd say yes, that made it hard for me to say no to him.
"Wala naman." I answered, my voice so little I was afraid he didn't hear me.
Turns out he did because his face lit up like a turned on light bulb.
"Great!" The was excitement on his voice. Damn, hindi na talaga ako pwedeng humindi.
What Caspian was asking from me... was dangerous waters. All of the alarms in my head were blaring and screaming at me, asking me questions that would only positively make my head ache.
Hindi talaga kami, we were in a relationship that was built from sexual tension. There was no need for us to do stuff only real couples do. Bringing a girlfriend or boyfriend to a company event was an example. It was exactly what Caspian wanted us to do tomorrow.
Hindi kaya... hindi kaya nafa-fall na si Caspian sa akin?
Kumabog ang dibdib ko kaba. It couldn't be, he couldn't be falling for me.
Hindi pwede. Hindi dapat. Kasi malinaw naman kung saan kami noon nag-umpisa.
Dapat linawin ko rin kung hanggang saan lang ba kami.
I thought of a way to clear things out between us. Surely, Caspian didn't ask me to come because he had caught feelings for me, right?
"Gustong gusto mo akong inilalabas e, ano?" I smirked at him. I tried my best to make my voice sound really really playful. I had to control myself so I wouldn't choke on my own voice. "Did you already fell for me?"
Natigil si Caspian sa pagsubo. Mas kinabahan ako. Bakit parang gulat na gulat siya? Did I took him of guard? But why?
Was I... was what I just thought of right?
Was he falling for me?
"Luka luka." Caspian answered, his voice rang in my head and made me snap out of my excessive thinking. "It's a tree planting activity. I heard maganda raw sa isip ng mga tao ang activities kagaya noon. It can relax the mind kaya naisip ko na makakatulong din iyon sa 'yo."
Sandaling natigilan ako. I unconsciously breathed a sigh of relief.
He wasn't falling. Ligtas pa kami pareho. We were still on the same page and I hoped it would stay that way.
"Sure ka diyan, ha?" Napangiti nang sabi ko. It was good to confirm that I was overthinking about nothing.
"No, I'm not entirely sure." He answered with a shrug. Sumubo siya ng isang french fry. "Isipin na lang natin na wala namang mawawala kung susubukan natin."
Hindi naman nahirapan si Caspian na i-convince akong sumama.
Kaya kinabukasan, maaga pa lang ay gising na ako at nakabihis na. Caspian slept at their unit, saying that he shouldn't sleep beside me kasi baka hindi raw kami matuloy at sa akin na lang daw siya magtanim nang magtanim. Minsan napakarumi rin talaga ng jokes nung tao na 'yun. Good thing I wasn't the type to easily get flustered.
"Mag-seatbelt ka." Utos sa akin ni Caspian nang nasa car na kaming dalawa. "Iksi ng short mo. I told you to wear something light that can cover your legs. Makulit ka talaga."
Napatingin ako sa suot ko. Cropped shirt na short sleeved at high waisted shorts. Nag boots naman ako since malapit daw sa mountain areas 'yung pagtataniman namin. I even brought my straw hat. Prepared ako at okay lang ang suot ko.
"I don't see any problem with what I'm wearing." Pagtataray ko na. Caspian sighed on the driver's seat while he maneuvered the car out of the underground parking lot.
"There's no problem in it generally." He said, his tone very calm compared to kanina. "Alam mong kahit kailan hindi kita pipigilang isuot ang gusto mong isuot."
"E anong nire-reklamo mo kanina?" Hindi mapigilan ko nang tanong. Caspian glared at me.
"Nagsasalita ako. Ikaw ba pag nagsasalita ka, sumisingit ako?" He asked. Kinilabutan ako sa tono niya. He wasn't mad... he sounded more reprimanding.
"No." Mahinang sagot ko. "I'm sorry."
"Kulit." Caspian pinched my chin lightly. "As I was saying, magtatanim kasi tayo. Hindi patag ang terrain doon at maraming pwedeng makasugat sa legs mo. Pero kung okay lang naman sa 'yo na masugatan ka edi I guess you're dressed just fine."
Napanguso ako. Oo nga, bakit hindi ko 'yun naisip? Basta ang ini-considered ko lang kanina ay baka mainit doon at pawisan ako. Hindi naman ako takot umitim kaya I wore these clothes I was wearing. Naisip ko rin na dapat madali lang akong makagalaw. I didn't think of the possible scratches I could get from this activity.
"Tigil tayo sa next stop over." Sabi ko matapos kong makapag isip isip.
"Why?" Caspian asked though I'm sure he was smirking.
"Bibili akong leggings." Inis na sagot ko bago siya pandilatan. He laughed at what I did. Namula ang mga pisngi ko from the embarrassment I felt. I huffed in irritation. "Malapit na kasal ni Demi. Pangit tingnan sa dress ko kapag puro sugat ako sa legs."
"Whatever you say." Natatawa pa ring sabi ni Caspian.
After an hour ay tumigil kami sa isang stop over sa gitna ng express way. May dalawang oras pa raw kami bago makarating doon sa province kung saan gaganapin ang tree planting activity.
Bumaba kaming dalawa ni Caspian. I squinted my eyes before I covered them with my hand as it was very hot outside and the harsh sunlight hit my face like it wanted to burn me. Masakit sa mata ang sikat ng araw at mabilis na nanlagkit ako kaagad. Feeling ko ay natunaw ang bb cream na inilagay ko kanila sa face.
Mabilis namang nakalapit si Caspian sa akin. He stood close in front of me. Naharangan niya na ang sinag ng araw kaya inalis ko na ang kamay sa mukha ko. I snaked my arm on his and began pulling him towards the shops.
"Let's buy something to drink first." He said. Inalis ni Caspian ang braso kong nakapulupot sa kanya bago niya hinawakan nang maayos ang kamay ko at hinila ako palapit sa isang coffee shop. "Mainit, baka ma-dehydrate ka."
Pumayag na lang ako at nagpahila na lang sa kanya. Mainit naman sa Manila pero hindi kasi ako talaga halos lumalabas kapag umaga at kung lalabas man ako ay sakay pa ng air conditioned na sasakyan at sa air conditioned na lugar din ang punta. Kaya ngayong naarawan ako nang ganito kalala ay parang nabigla ang katawan ko sa init at banas.
Pagpasok namin ni Caspian sa coffee shop ay nakahinga ako nang maluwag. Para kasi talagang walang hangin sa labas, e. Mainit na nga tapos still pa ang hangin na humid din. Iba talaga ang init dito sa mga lugar sa East part ng Pilipinas.
"Anong gusto mo?" Tanong ni Caspian, gwapo pa rin kahit medyo pawisan na. Nakakainis. Bakit ganyan ang itsura niya?
"Anything na cold." Huminga ako nang malalim, trying to get more oxygen in my system.
"Lemon?" He asked again. Tumango ako.
"Lemon."
Iniwan ako ni Caspian sa isang table for two at siya na nga ang nag-order. I focused on breathing properly again. Grabe dito, kahit siguro wala akong hika o sakit sa puso ay hihingalin ako. First time ko rin naman kasing pupunta sa province na nasa East kaya siguro ganito.
Pinanood ko si Caspian na mag-order. Wala rin naman akong ibang magagawa since iniwan ko sa kotse ang cellphone ko na naka-charge. May built in power bank kasi ang kotse ni Caspian na kahit nakapatay ang kotse ay pwedeng mag charge.
Napataas ang kilay ko nang mapansin ko ang dalawang babae na nasa likod niya. They were giggling and one of them even tried to poke Caspian's arm. Naka-crossed arms kasi si Caspian kaya his pectoral muscles were a little more prominent as they contracted.
Sa hindi ko malamang dahilan ay nainis ako. Oh, maybe I do know the reason. Nakakainis na may mga babaeng nakakita lang ng lalakeng gwapo at may muscle ay attracted na. Paano kung masamang tao pala si Caspian? Kililigin pa rin ba sila basta may itsura?
May mga babae talagang walang sense of self preservation.
At paano na lang kung may girlfriend na? Hindi sila nahihiya na maka-offend ng kapwa nila babae?
Bakit Quinn, offended ka ba sa ginagawa nila?
Pakiramdam ko kumulo ang dugo ko. Ang init init na nga, pinag-iinit pa ng mga babae na 'to ang ulo ko.
Ang mas nakakainis pa, hindi ko alam kung saan nanggagaling ang lakas ng loob ko para makaramdam ako nang ganito. Sure, boyfriend ko si Caspian pero hindi ba at ako na rin naman ang naglinaw sa sarili ko na hindi normal ang relationship namin?
Oh, e anong inaarte arte mo diyan?
Hindi ko rin alam. Basta ang alam ko, naiinis ako at may gusto akong sabunutan.
Other girls shouldn't touch who was mine. Kasi kahit hindi namin mahal ni Caspian ang isa't isa, akin pa rin siya.
That Caspian Hernandez was mine.
And I wasn't afraid to show them that.
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