Back To Where He Wants To Be

By by_cur

51.9K 1.4K 546

When Steve went to return the stones, he's not only bringing the stones with him but the slightest hope of br... More

A Soul For A Soul
Changes After My Return (Steve)
James
It's Nice Seeing You Again
Vision
Thor's Back
Natasha's Breakdown
After The Third Snap
He's Mine Isn't He?
Welcome Back
James Turns 2
He Came Back For Her
How Was He In The Past
Maybe

I Would've

2K 79 9
By by_cur



Few days later, at the compound.

"I believe I am here for you."

Wanda froze in her seat, she knows that voice so well, everyone does. His distinct voice wouldn't be mistaken for anyone else's. "Vis." she says, her back still on him. A tear fell from her eyes, slowly, she turns to look at him.

"I'm sorry, it took me long." he wiped her tear with the back of his finger. Wanda started crying even more. Vision stepped closer to hug her, "It's okay.. I'm here now.".

While they were catching up, downstairs, Hope and Natasha are having a quiet conversation.

"Scott is really enjoying his time with James." she smiles, "He didn't get to have that much leisure with Cassie, when she was that age.".

Natasha nods, "It didn't make him less of a good father.".

Hope agrees, she doesn't need to say it. "So" she pauses for a moment thinking if it's appropriate to ask what she's about to ask.

Natasha raises her brows, urging her to go on.

"If you loved each other, why let him go?"

Natasha smirks before countering her question, "If he loved me the way I did, why did he go?".

"Right." Hope softly laughs.

Natasha takes in a deep breathe, "I thought I couldn't have this.", she looks at James who's at a distance playing with Scott, "A normal life, a child.".

She swallows and shifts her gaze to the cup of coffee she's holding. "I saw him, quite few times, admiring a family, playing around with a kid. Those are the only times I've seen him alive in those five years full of reminders of our failure. I can see it through his eyes. I know how much he wants that life, live normally with his own family, a wife, and his own child to raise.", she shakes her head subtly, "and I thought I couldn't give him that, and I didn't want to give him less. I didn't want him to settle for less when he deserves more than that.".

/fb/

Steve and Natasha saw a girl building a house for her dog.

'Hey kid.'

'Mr., can you give me some hand.'

'Yeah sure.'

They found out she's the only one who survived from her family.

Steve helped her while Natasha surveys the area in search for more kids who's left orphaned and when she came back she saw Steve playing around with the little girl.

Regret, Pain, Guilt were the first ones she saw in Steve's eyes when he first approached the girl. Now, she can only see admiration in his eyes, and he's having fun, for the first time in months after the snap.

Few years later, while visiting Steve's counseling session.

'One of the members. Parents with two kids, the other child was dusted.'

The mother joins the counseling, torn between being happy they still have one left or sorry for the one thats lost.

'She's strong, acting strong in front of her son.'.

Steve admiringly stares at the family, 'I'd do anything for my kids too.'.

Natasha just stares at him, thinking how great a father could Steve be and how great it'd be if she could be the one to give him that, but no, she's incapable —she thought.

/fb ends/

Steve who accidentally came in soon as Natasha explains, stood there, silently listening from behind a compartment.

Natasha slightly tilts her head to look at Hope, pressing her lips together before continuing, "But he should've still stayed.", she playfully remarks to ease the seriousness between them.

Hope just smiled at her, "Well, he should've.", nodding in agreement.

Steve from where he is standing thought to himself, 'I should've. If you told me I would still have.'.

/fb/

Vormir

'But that's not the life you wanted'

Steve wanted to assure her that it's not like that, that he's happy in the present time, but he can't find the words to tell her... deep down he's also questioning himself, is this not the life he wanted? The one with Peggy in it.

After a while, he responds softly, 'It is.'.

It won't if you knew I couldn't conceive, she thought to herself. 'Go, it's okay.', she told him. It is not, deep down she knows it's not.

'Don't you want me to stay?'

'I just want you to know, that if something happens when you return the stone. If you want to take the chance, that it's okay. That I'll be okay.'

'Natasha.'

'It's amazing how small things can change our decisions, Steve. And I don't want to hold you back.'

/fb ends/

Natasha still remembers what she told him that moment in Vormir. She thought it will be easy to accept if Steve decides to go back in the past, but its not. Easier said than done, indeed.

She'd be lying if she didn't hope he'd stay despite telling him she'll be okay, despite the chance in front of him. She'd like to his love for her is strong enough to turn his back on that chance given to him. That the 11 years of knowing each other, 9 years of being partners and more than half a decade of sharing feelings for each other is more than enough to make him stay. That his family here are enough to be called home.

And because she hoped for it, it became more painful when it turned out the other way from what she hope for it to be.

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