⚠️⚠️Warning this story contains cursing, fire arm, gore, graphic details, satanism, and 18+ content. If you're okay with this then please enjoy but if you're not comfortable with this then please read with caution or read something else! You have been warned⚠️⚠️
This book will be Gender Neutral meaning, I'll only use "They/Them" pronouns
Car horns honked and busy streets filled with voices. A big building, with black and white horns on it, was presented right in front of a sign that said:
"Welcome to
IMPCITY
Est. 1981"
Taking a look inside the big building were, of course, rooms for business purposes. One door had a paper sign on it that was written in crayon and said:
"I.M.P Headquarters
Meetins In Progress :)"
Footsteps clicked in the room and a tall demon, named Blitzø, spoke
(The 'O' is like a Proxy Sign for Creepypasta's but we'll use Blitz)
"Alright, now I know business has been.. A bit slow lately, yes.." He walked around before leaning on the big table
"It's no one's fault, okay? Not naming any names here.. Moxxie" He continued and muttered Moxxie's name
Moxxie looked at him in confusion as his mouth gaped open in surprise, someone snickered and then quieted themselves
"Now does anyone have any bright ideas on how we can get business up and drummin' again?" Blitz asked
A wolf was looking down at her phone, Moxxie slightly glared at the demon, and another red demon began thinking while tapping their chin
"What about a car wash?!" A female demon exclaimed with sparkles in her eyes and she stood up then slammed her hand on the table
"This is hell Millie, no one cares about cars being clean here. Okay? Oh, what about a billboard!" Blitz said with the same look in his face
"We can't afford a billboard, sir" Moxxie and a demon, named Y/N, simultaneously said
Moxxie rolled his eyes in annoyance while Y/N giggled at Moxxie and Blitz
"Helpful Moxxie, Y/N, really glad you two are in the room right now" Blitz muttered then pushed Moxxie out of his seat yet leaving Y/N alone
"Have you guys forgotten what services we provide?" Blitz asked, he grabbed a remote and turned on the T.V making everyone, besides Moxxie and Loona, look at it in interest
The T.V presented Blitz slamming someone's face in. He laughed as blood splattered around
Moxxie held a shotgun in a demon's mouth as he was tied to a chair, the blue demon looked very worried and scared but it quickly disappeared when his face got blown off. Moxxie flew back due to the shot gun's blow
The wolf, named Loona, had someone in her mouth. She aggressively bit them and shook them around in their mouth, like a toy. The person screamed in agony
Someone was in front of Millie so she held a scythe and slit their whole head off, Millie giggled and held her scythe behind her
Y/N sharpened their claws and ripped someone's insides out, they screamed and fell to the ground. Y/N shook their hand and the blood fell off
"Ah, those were the good times" Blitz sighed, he held a bowl of Popcorn and he, Loona, and Y/N ate it
"I don't need any reminding sir, considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious T.V add last week. One that you additionally paid for a full three hours on a channel
Nobody watches" Moxxie sternly growled, Millie sat next to him and awkwardly ate the Popcorn
"Uh, hey excuse me. What's obnoxious about a super fun jingle? Alright, it's a fun distraction when an advertisement spitten' bullshit" Blitz smiled, he walked around the room
"People love musicals, sir" Millie innocently said, Y/N nodded
"Exactly Millie and we're basically doing a musical" Blitz replied, he gently did some jazz hands
"Are you gonna gonna crush my musical dreams like my dad did?" Blitz asked with a saddened voice
"Sir-" Moxxie said but got cut off by Blitz
"Cause right now, all I see is my dad's asshole talking to me, crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside" Blitz finished and leaned against a wall
Moxxie looked at him, annoyed and confused. Y/N scoffed then smiled
"Are you trying to crush his dreams Moxxie?" Millie smirked and leaned towards Moxxie
"I-
What?" Moxxie asked his wife, who leaned on her hand then lazily looked at Moxxie
"I thought I knew you" She flirted, the two lovingly looked at each other. Moxxie blushed and Millie stuck out her tongue in a playful gesture
Y/N squealed and shook their fists in excitement, they brightly smiled and clapped their hands at the two
"I can't believe you Moxxie and after I made you Employ Of The Month" Blitz cried, he held a picture frame that held Moxxie's picture
It seemed the demon wasn't ready for his picture as his coffee spilled and he looked a bit weird, Millie and Y/N snorted
"Okay! Sir.." Moxxie threw his hands in the air and Millie swiftly avoided him, she giggled while Moxxie sighed
"I'm sorry, a commercial jingle is not culpable to musical theater. Nobody actually likes the jingle" Moxxie shook his head
Millie and Y/N looked at Moxxie
"I liked it!" They both happily said
Moxxie turned to them
"Do not..Do not agree with him in front of me" He pointed an angry finger at them
Blitz rolled his eyes and the T.V showed another Ad the demons made
3
2-
"Hi there, I'm Blitzø! The 'O' is silent and I'm the founder of I.M.P, are you piece of shit who got yourself sent to hell or are you an innocent soul who got FUCKED over by someone else?" Blitz crazily smiled, he showed himself in blood then in an Angelic robe with a halo, throwing away trash
"After lovingly killing my wife for FUCKING A DELIVERY MAN, you can imagine my surprise when I wound up here. After the state of Ohio killed me! I really wish I could stick it to that YAPPY JOGGER who saw me hiding the body!" A strong, red demon growled
The demon clenched his fist in anger and veins popped out of his neck when he yelled, demonically. Blitz awkwardly held a sign that said
"SOME GUY
WHO
HIRED US"
Mille, Moxxie, and Y/N were in a small circle, a white pentagram was marked into the wood flooring
They all prepared for the opening to the Living World
"Well lucky for you, thanks to our company's special access to the Living World, we can help you take care of your unfinished business by taking out anyone who screwed you over when you alive!" Blitz yelled and opened the portal with a spell book, the three demons all flew back from the blow
Blitz fell back into the hole, lava flew from it and transitioned to a man who looked very angry
(Time to sing boys and girls)
"When you want somebody gone and you don't want to wait to long, call the Immediate Murder Professional" Someone sang as a body fell from the sky, the angry man looked up, smiled, and saw the four demons
Moxxie held a gun, Millie held her scythe, Y/N held their sharpened claws, and Blitz stood at the top of them all as their eyes reddened
"With grenades or cyanide, we'll make it look like suicide" The man continued to sing, Moxxie threw a grenade out a window and the other demons took cover
Blitz then tugged at a rope that had a man struggling for breath since a noose was wrapped around his neck
Millie giggled and held paperwork while Moxxie lovingly, yet crazily, smiled at her, and Y/N rocked on her feet while they innocently smiled at the scene
"The Immediate Murder Professional!" It then showed Blitz shocking someone who was tied up in wires, Millie slammed someone on the head with a Medieval Flail, Moxxie aggressively strangled someone as he drooled, and Y/N breaking someone's knees before slitting their throat
Blitz led everyone into a portal that was on a wall. Unfortunately, Moxxie tripped over some books
"We do our job so well because we come straight out from hell!" The four all jumped up from a portal from hell, Moxxie face planted and Y/N picked him up and looked ahead..
Only to see that they ended up in a Church, their grins faded into an awkward stare as the people in the Church looked at them, afraid
"We'll kill your husband or your wife, we'll even let you keep the knife!" Millie attempted to stab a couple who were.... As they say doing, 69 (Uh-)
Moxxie covered his face with his hand, in embarrassment. Blitz held a pair of underwear as his tongue stuck out (Um-) And Y/N hid behind Moxxie, their face red
Then, Blitz began stabbing someone's head with a knife as he was cross eyed and his tongue still out
"We are the Immediate Murder Professional!" The man sang as multiple scenes of humans dying from the demons such as:
Getting stretched out
Getting chased by a shark
Getting burned alive
Getting suffocated by pillows
Getting crushed by a piano
And, getting the electric chair...
To Be Continued
Wheee, new story idea yay! So, I decided to do this because Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss are completely different things, both presented in hell but not the same genre-
If that makes sense-
Anyways! Enjoy, love y'all!!💛💛
Word Count:1609