"I need you, Ryan."
"I'm here, Bella." He cups my face in the palm of his hand, I take in his warmth.
"Why?" I cried softly.
"Why did you leave me?" I asked with my shaky voice, his hand didn't leave my cheek. I stared deeply into his eyes trying to find some sort of the truth but I couldn't find anything, his eyes were only glimmering with regret.
He glanced down, he was struggling to find the right words which made me even more anxious. I just need to know a reason, maybe it could answer why everyone else has left me.
"I was a dumb teenager that took shit for granted. Once I left you, I knew I made the biggest mistake of my life." He says.
He moved a little closer to me, I stayed put. Our mouths were only inches apart, I felt nothing being this close to him. "I never stopped loving you, Isabella."
He claimed my lips, it wasn't the same. I actually felt sick having his lips against mine, they don't belong there anymore but I couldn't pull away. I just wanted some type of comfort, someone just to take all the rejection away which is horrible because he's engaged. I'm a shitty person, I know that.
I ran my fingers through his hair, kissing his lips harder. He picked me up and moved us more on the bed, I softly wrapped my legs around his torso. My hands made there way up to his cheeks. We kissed one last time before we both pulled apart to catch our breaths, we placed our foreheads against each other's with our eyes closed.
"God, you're engaged."
"Let's worry about it tomorrow." Ryan whispers, in a soft, humble voice.
Hell no, asshole.
"Ryan.." I was trying to knock some sense into him.
"I love you, Isabella." He snuggled his head between my neck and chest, breathing in my scent. I didn't reply because I don't love him the way he loves me so instead I closed my eyes and drowned myself in guilt.
Next morning
The sun was pecking in through the blinds, a strong, heavy arm was draped over my waist. Ryan was sound asleep, holding me close to him. I slowly trailed my finger against his forehead down to his chin, he pulled me closer to him with a smile.
"Good morning, Bella." He whispers with his eyes still shut. His hair was messy, it reminded me of when we were younger and had sleepovers.
"Morning." I said, his eyes fluttered open meeting my green ones.
I was about to say something when the door opened.
"Rya..."
A voice that I didn't recognize filled the room, I glanced at the door while he sat up immediately, he recognized the voice. His beautiful fiancée walked in with a shocked face, tears started pouring down her painted cheeks.
"Tiffany." He gasped, her eyes met mine and back to his, her eyes then found there way back to mine.
"You whore." Her voice came out broken, she wiped her tears and ran out the room. I know, Ryan didn't look at me, he instead ran after his fiancée.
I trapped my mouth with hand, guilt immediately filled my body again, tears started to brim my eyes.
I ran with the sheets wrapped around my body, my mascara was dried up against my cheeks because of last night, my lips smudge with last nights red lipstick, my dress was still on from the dinner. I ran in the direction I seen them leave in, they were in the living room.
I listened carefully to their conversation.
"Tiffany it wasn't like that..." He tried to explain.
"Did you do anything with her?" She screams with tears in her eyes.
Ryan looked down in shame. "I kissed her." He says, lowly, barely enough to hear.
"Do you love her?" She wipes her tears, trying to get answers from him.
It took him a couple seconds before responding, what he said took me by surprise. "I do love her but not enough to risk losing you." He says, lifting his eyes to meet hers.
"Did you feel pity for her because you fell in love with me?" She asked with a little more content.
"Yes, I had unfinished business with her, I'm sorry." He says while consuming her in a loving hug.
I didn't notice that I was crying till I felt some type of watery substance fall on my arm, I released the sheet and clutched my stomach in pain, I felt the need to throw up.
"He's engaged, Isabella." I heard a familiar voice say from behind me, I swiftly turned around.
My mom was standing in a robe with a hurt expression, for a second there I thought she found out about Carter and I.
"He's getting married, you know how I feel about cheating, your father did it to me." Her voice was laced with shame, she looked disgusted by me.
"Mom-" I tried explaining.
"Especially since they're expecting a child together, you want to ruin their family." My mom screams at me, I jump at the coldness of her voice.
A child, she's pregnant. He's such a liar.
I turned back around, Ryan was already staring at me with regret. "She's pregnant?" I tilted my head at him with tears filling my eyes again.
"What the hell is going on?" Carter's sounded irritated.
"Yes, you homewrecking slut." She yells. The truth hurts, I now know that feeling.
I hugged myself, looking back at my mom and Carter. My mom didn't even try to defend me, she just simply stared. I glanced back at Ryan, he wasn't even looking at me nor saying anything to defend me. How the fuck did I get into this situation? I'm not welcomed here, I'm not wanted by no one and it's always going to be like this. I ruin families like my father, my worst nightmare finally became reality, I'm just like my dad.
"I'm so sorry." I told Tiffany, I turned around to look at my mom before running off.
I ran to my room, my hands clawed at my door opening it, I got inside just to lean against my door.
"I need to leave." I told myself. "I'll go to the one place where I know I'm wanted."
I wiped my tears and tied my hair up in a bun and ran over to my closet before grabbing all my clothes, I shoved it all in my duffel bag. I waited till night time, no one even came to check up on me, not Ryan nor Carter. I waited till twelve and grabbed some paper and a pen.
I left my letter for my mom on my bed and grabbed my stuff. I grabbed my moms car keys off the empty kitchen table and ran outside to her car. I stared at the house for a second knowing I'll never see Carter again, all I can hope for is that they live their best lives without me.
My mom is beautiful and smart, she deserves to have a happy ending and I deserve the opposite of that. I picked up my phone and dialed his number while starting the car engine.
"Hello?" A voice answered, a voice haven't heard for years. I could hear him breathing over the phone, I could almost feel his breath against my cheek.
"I'm coming home." I replied. His breathing slowed down once he realized who it was, his princess, his pride and joy, his negotiation.
"You know what will happen, right princess?" He questioned. I know it a little to well, I remember that fight many years ago, he's the man my mother has been protecting me from, his the man that will forever hold me heart.
"Yes." I said with tears in my eyes.
He says something else on the phone that I know I have to reply to because I sadly felt the same way. I can't disrespect him because he's the reason why I'm alive.
"Love you too, daddy."
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