"Good morning, students," a voice rang over the loudspeaker, "As most of you may know, our senior Spring Formal is slowly approaching. It will be on Saturday the 1st October starting at 7pm in the school auditorium. We hope to see you there!"
An excited buzz ran through our Modern History class as everyone began discussing what they wanted to wear and who they hoped would ask them to the formal.
"Okay, okay!" our teacher said, sounding heavily exasperated. "You get 5 minutes to talk about Spring Formal and then we get back to work!"
The excited buzz turned into a loud chatter and I turned to look at Bailey. She looked thoroughly unimpressed at the entire idea of a formal as she swung back in her chair.
"Spring formal? Is that like...important?" I asked her curiously. Spring formal wasn't a thing down in Adelaide. The only times we ever had formals was when we graduated year ten and twelve. We were halfway through year eleven, so why was this happening?
"It's just a fundraiser pretty much. Everyone pays like $25 for a ticket and they use the money to upgrade something in the school. Huge waste of time if you ask me..." she drawled.
"I guess you won't be going then," I assumed.
"Definitely not," she replied.
"That's a shame," I said, "I thought we could've had a few dances together."
She looked at me curiously, her eyebrows raised and a small smile on her face.
"If I didn't know any better, Lawrence, I'd think you were flirting with me..." she said, leaning closer as she spoke. She was right, I was flirting with her...but I wasn't about to admit that.
"Well, Lancaster...I like to dance with my friends." I said coolly, trying to maintain my calm exterior. Bailey leaned closer, whispering into my ear;
"Just how you like to kiss them?"
She then pressed her lips slowly to my cheek, letting them linger before pulling away. I was frozen in place and my mind was not cooperating with my body. I willed myself to say something....anything.
"Yep, exactly..." I managed to finally say, attempting to remain calm and collected although I was anything but. Bailey had undoubtedly left me feeling hot and bothered, and I could feel a throbbing in between my thighs as I sat there. I crossed my legs as casually as possible, trying to squash the feeling of arousal.
Bailey rolled her eyes and moved back over to her seat, smirking at me the entire time. I could feel her gaze on me but I didn't dare look.
"Will you be going?" she asked me.
"Probably, I've never been to a formal before so it would be nice to go," I admitted, "Plus, I don't think the girls would let me stay home."
"You're right, I'm pretty sure they'd force you to go," she chuckled.
"Maybe you'll change your mind?" I suggested. I really did want her to come, the thought of seeing her eyes light up when she saw me made my heart beat just that little bit faster. Who was I kidding? I liked this girl.
"I highly doubt that, but I guess we'll see," she said, winking at me before turning back to face the front of the classroom. The teacher, Mrs Hanley, interrupted the excited talking of winter formal to continue her lesson, and we sat and listened as she rambled on about something completely foreign to me.
Once class was over, I turned to Bailey as I put my books in my bag.
"Did you want to come over this afternoon to work on the assignment?" I asked her.
"I can't today, I have a date," she said. My heart dropped. A date? Surely not.
"With Katie?" I asked before I could stop myself. Fuck.
"How did you know?" she asked me, and I could feel her practically reading my mind as I sat there trying to figure out an answer.
"I just figured since you were talking to her the other day in the car park," I lied. God Asha, you suck at lying.
"Oh, that's right. Is somebody jealous?" She teased me, a dimple appearing on her cheek as she smiled.
"Jealous? No!" I awkwardly laughed, "You can date whoever you want. Just don't spend too much time with her, I want to pass this assignment!"
"Yes, ma'am!" Bailey said, saluting me as she walked out of the classroom. Fuck my life, I've known this girl all of a month and I've already got a stupid crush. I was scared, I'd never had a crush on a girl before. Did this make me gay?
༻✧༺
The next morning in Modern History I couldn't help but wait anxiously for Bailey to arrive. I was desperate to know how her date with Katie had gone, and part of me wanted it to have gone terribly.
Okay...all of me wanted it to have gone terribly.
Bailey walked in and slumped down on her chair, grabbing her books out with her uninjured hand. I still felt guilty that she had broken it, and I still wondered why she had been so protective over me.
"How was your date?" I asked, trying to sound as casual as possible.
"Yeah it was okay, wouldn't really call it a date though," she said simply.
"Oh? Why not?" I asked.
"It was just sex pretty much, I left straight after," she replied.
My heart literally dropped, the thought of Bailey sleeping with someone made me feel sick. Jealousy courses through my veins and I tried my best not to show my emotions. I managed to steady my voice before replying.
"Oh, so will there be a second date?" I asked.
"Nah, I don't fuck the same person twice. I don't do attachment," she stated.
I don't think I had ever felt so disheartened in my entire life. I felt like my heart had fallen through my ass and was just sitting broken on the floor. I saw every thought I had about me and Bailey fly out the window. The day dreams of me and her going on dates, cuddling and kissing, just being together...it all vanished with those four words. 'I don't do attachment.' The last person who 'didn't do attachment' had left me heartbroken back in Adelaide. He used me for his own self esteem and then fucked me off when it suited him. It took me a long time to get over that, but this seemed to hurt more.
"You okay?" Bailey asked, putting her hand on my arm. The warmth from her hand made me visibly shiver and I saw Bailey smirk.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Are you coming to Chelsea's party in the holidays?" I said, eager to change the subject and distract myself from the fact that I was hurting.
"Yeah, wouldn't miss it. Can't pass up an opportunity to get drunk and have a good time," she said with a smile.
"Yeah, I want to go to a party and not get attacked by Luke," I said with a slight laugh, and Bailey's eyes softened sympathetically.
"Asha, if or when he comes back to school, I promise I won't let him hurt you," she said, grabbing onto my hand and squeezing it tightly. That familiar feeling went through my body at her touch.
"How can you be sure though?" I whispered.
"Do you trust me?" she asked seriously, and I nodded. "Then believe me, you're safe."
I couldn't help but wonder how she was so certain she could keep me safe from him. He would surely return to school and I'd be next to him in music class. Why was she so adamant to take care of me? The thoughts of Luke and what he did to me began to pump adrenaline through my body, and soon enough I couldn't hide the fact that I was having a full blown panic attack. My breathing became shallow and my palms were sweating, my body shaking like a leaf. I could barely say a word, let alone draw attention to myself and ask the teacher if I could be excused.
Bailey noticed my hand shaking severely, my pen tapping involuntarily against the table. She quickly covered her hand with mine to stop the shaking and yelled out to the teacher.
"Mrs Hanley, Asha and I left some books for our assignment in the Library, can we go and grab them?"
The teacher nodded without looking up from her laptop, and Bailey took hold of my hand and practically dragged me out the door. As soon as we were out of earshot from the classroom I burst into tears, collapsing in a heap in Bailey's arms. She protectively wrapped her arms around me tightly, shushing my comfortingly and telling me everything was going to be okay as she whispered in my ear. Her hand rubbed soothing circles on my back as I sobbed into her neck.
She guided me over to a bench in the hallway and sat down, pulling me into her lap as she did so. If I wasn't so wrapped up in thoughts of what Luke had done to me, I probably would've been excited at what was happening.
"I'm so s-sorry," I sobbed, pulling back from her and wiping my face clean from the tears that had escaped me.
"Ash, don't be sorry. But please trust me when I say he won't hurt you ever again," she said, reaching her hand up and wiping a stray tear that I had missed from my cheek. I leant my face into her hand as she cupped my cheek tenderly, and in that moment I swear I could feel something between us. A connection...and a strong one at that.
"I trust you," I whispered, and without another word she leant forward and placed her lips on my forehead, kissing me firmly. We stayed there for what felt like hours...her lips pressed to my forehead, our breathing in time as we sat there in each other's arms. I wrapped my arms tighter around her neck and sighed, and I felt her lips smile against my forehead. I felt comfortable, I felt safe, I felt home.
"Come on, we should probably grab some books from the library so Mrs Hanley doesn't get suspicious," Bailey said, taking my hand and not letting it go until we reached the library doors.