You didn't know what brought you to where you were now. You were in the back alleys of the city, far from where you'd run from. You stood there, phone shakily in your hand. In the other, you held the comet charm close to your chest.
You were still unfeeling. You knew that you should cry- that you should scream or yell or do anything- but you couldn't. You were just numb and trembling. You knew that this feeling of emptiness would come to pass and then everything would hurt again, but you couldn't help but welcome it, even if you hated yourself for feeling this way.
You blamed yourself for the death of Mustard. You didn't even get to know his actual name. The kid died, and there would probably be no one who remembered him. No one except for you and the rest of the League.
You wondered if he had a family- if any of them had bothered to look for him after he had disappeared. You wondered if he had a life before he joined the League. There was so much that you never got to know about the boy- so much that you wouldn't ever find out. You hated yourself for it.
You hated yourself for a lot of things, actually. You hated that you couldn't process what had just happened. You hated that you hadn't been able to grab onto the hem of his jacket on time. You hated that you hadn't thought to more properly warn the others about the danger that Overhaul posed to them. You hated that you'd found yourself in a position to play god. And most of all, you hated yourself for not being able to prevent another death despite Nighteye's warnings.
A wave of nausea passed over you as you realized that you were still covered in Mustard's remains. You looked down at your shirt- which was sticky with blood. You'd never seen this much of it before, much less on your own person. You gagged again, bile rising in your throat as you tried and failed to process the fact that you were covered in your friend's remnants. You saw something fall out of your hair from the corner of your eye and you looked down at it, blanching when you realized what it was.
It was a fucking tooth. Mustard's tooth had been in your hair. You couldn't help it. You emptied the contents of your stomach onto the ground of the alleyway, retching even more at the smell of iron and vomit. When you were finished, you wiped at your mouth with your blood-soaked sleeve.
Shakily, you looked back at your phone. Still trembling, you pressed someone's contact, listening to it ring. The person on the other end picked up almost immediately, and you were bombarded with a myriad of questions as they called your name.
"Where are you? I've been trying to text you for days! I know we didn't leave off on the best terms, but you can't just leave me hanging like that! Eraser's been worried sick! And so have I! We were so worried about you. Just... don't do that do me again, okay?"
"Mirio," you said- your voice nearly a whisper. You'd meant to talk louder, but it seemed that you weren't able to. "I need help."
You knew that you had no right to ask the boy for anything. You had lied to him and actively worked with villains. You had essentially betrayed everything he knew and loved. But for some reason, he still worried about you. He was still concerned. Some part of you hoped that he would come rescue you from... from what had just happened. You hoped that maybe if you went back to him, all of the bad things would disappear. That you might feel whole again.
"What happened?" Mirio asked, and the floodgates opened.
You felt tears well up in your eyes, and even though you were still emotionally numb, you sobbed into the receiver. You stayed like that for a little bit- with him just listening to you cry- before you spoke again. You gave him your location as a choked sob erupted from your throat. "I... I need a new pair of clothes, too."
"Stay on the phone," Mirio commanded, and you complied. "I'm on my way. Whatever happened... we'll work through it, okay? Everything is going to be okay."
It wasn't, but you still appreciated him saying that. Perhaps you could pretend for a while longer. You waited for him to arrive, the only sounds you could hear being that of your own crying. It didn't take very long for him to get there, and when he did, you noticed that he was panting. He must've run the entire way.
When Mirio saw you, he immediately pulled you into a hug. You wanted to push him away- to demand why he was doing this- but instead you leaned into his touch, not even noticing that you stained his already red shirt with blood. He pulled back and reached his hand up to cup your face, eyes widening when he noticed the substance covering you. "Is that blood?"
You sobbed then, and he wordlessly passed you a new pair of clothes. He looked away as you changed, your movements almost considered robotic. The clothes were too big for you- presumably belonging to Mirio himself- but you didn't mind. You were too focused on crying.
You were disassociating as you did so, not really understand what was going on as Mirio lifted up a damp washcloth to clean off your face. You simply leaned into his touch, knowing that albeit you didn't deserve him, you were still grateful. He was quiet as he worked, but you knew the silence wouldn't last for long. It was only a matter of time before he questioned you about what took place to make you come to him like this.
"What happened?" Mirio finally asked, voice quiet as to not spook you.
"I was... my friend. Overhaul... he..." you trailed off, clutching the comet chain in your hand so hard that it left indents on your palm. "Overhaul killed him."
"Overhaul? The one you were working for?" Mirio asked, and you nodded. "The police have been trying to pin a crime on him for months now. If you testify, you could get him arrested."
"How would I explain being there?" you asked. You thought of Mustard. You thought of his goofy grin and the way he would act as if you were his older sister. You felt a tear slip down your cheek. "It's my fault he died."
"No!" Mirio said, grabbing you by the shoulders. You looked up at him, startled. "It's not your fault! I know that, even if I don't know what happened. You would never let an innocent person die! Whatever happened, it was not your fault!"
"I should've warned him about Overhaul," you protested. You hugged your arms to your chest, feeling smaller than you ever had before. "If I had, he wouldn't have tried to attack him. He would still be here. He was... he was a kid, Mirio. He was just a kid."
"It's not your fault," Mirio repeated, holding you closer to his chest. "It'll be okay. I'm going to be by your side through all of this. I'm never going to leave you again."
You clutched at his shirt, eyes filling back up with tears as you asked, "Why are you helping me?"
He just laughed softly. "Because we're friends. And plus, I like you. I'm not just going to leave you behind. Even if you've made some mistakes, it doesn't make you a bad person. You always had good intentions, even if you were a little misguided."
You nodded, and he continued. "Let's get back to the dorms, okay? You'll feel better once we get someplace warm."
Sure enough, now that you were slowly grounding yourself, you realized that it was currently freezing. You shivered, and Mirio hummed, wrapping his jacket around you. You thanked him, and he just smiled at you comfortingly as he grabbed your hand, leading you back to UA.
▌│█║▌║▌║
You took a shower as soon as you made it back to the dorms. Even though you were in new clothes and Mirio washed your face, the water was still stained red from where the blood had gotten onto your hair and hands. You cried in the shower too, hoping that the sound of the falling water would block out your sobs. It didn't seem to work though, since Mirio immediately pulled you into another hug once you got out.
You only cried harder at that.
Over the next few days, you learned a couple of things. The first came from Mirio, who told you that someone anonymous had reported suspicious behavior in an old warehouse. It didn't take a genius to know that it was the same place that the League had met up with Overhaul. According to Mirio, the murder of Mustard had been traced back to the yakuza boss, and there was currently a group of pro heroes ready to raid his headquarters and arrest those inside.
The raid itself would be happening within the next week, and you had no plans to stop it. Let him get what he deserved, you thought to yourself.
Deep down, you never thought that Overhaul had been a good person. You had just felt indebted to him because he saved your life. Still, it hurt knowing that he had murdered one of your friends. The score to settle felt more... personal, now. And while you knew that the heroes who were going to raid the building didn't know about Eri, you hoped that they would save her anyways. You wondered if they would even be able to find her. You prayed that they would.
You were still grieving, of course. You were more detached than you usually were, and Nejire had noticed that you were holing yourself in your dorm. Mirio visited you daily with updates, visiting you as much as he possibly could to hold true on his promise not to leave you again. He had helped you turn the comet keychain into a necklace that you wore underneath your usual outfits, too. Having it there against your chest made you feel closer to your fallen friend. To the one person you might have considered like a brother here.
You still visited Eri. You refused to break that promise to her. You just made sure to stay far, far away from Overhaul during those visits. Thankfully, the Eight Bullets didn't seem to mind that you were avoiding their boss, even though you knew that they notified him of your arrival daily. You were grateful that Overhaul hadn't tried to reach out to you, too. You knew that if he had, you probably would have slapped him.
Kurono had tried to talk to you about what happened at one point, telling you that Overhaul had tried to put Mustard back together once you left, but you didn't believe him. You had seen the way that Overhaul had looked at you after you emerged from your hiding place. He had been cold- calculating. It was the look of a killer.
You didn't bother talking to him after that.
It was a few days later when it happened. Mirio had coaxed you out of your room, convincing you to come with him to an ice cream place a few blocks down, when Eri suddenly barreled out of one of the alleyways, catapulting herself into your arms. You had stared at her in shock, unsure of what to do. You waited a moment for Overhaul to follow her out of the shadows, but he didn't. You waited a few moments longer and still, nothing happened.
"How are you here?" You had asked her. "Are you okay?"
She nodded; eyes filled with tears. "I touched one of the bad men and he disappeared. The door was open so I ran, and now I found you."
"Does anyone know you're here?" you asked, and she shook her head. Mirio watched the whole thing unfold silently, not wanting to interrupt. When you finally looked over at him, you gave him a brief explanation as to who she was and what she was doing here.
"Overhaul was using her for her quirk?" He repeated as he listened to you, wide eyed. "Who would do that to a child? That's horrible."
You nodded grimly. "I know. We should get out of here, though. And I'm taking her with us. She stays with me from now on, okay?"
You had already lost one kid. You weren't going to lose another, you swore to yourself. You weren't going to let the same tragedy that befell Mustard happen to Eri. You were going to protect her. You wouldn't fail her as you did your fallen friend. You picked up Eri, holding her close to your chest as you and Mirio made a run for it back in the direction of UA.
"Overhaul is going to be after her," you told him. "We can't let anyone know that we have her."
You were careful to keep her face hidden as you all speed walked, trying your best to avoid gathering other people's attention. It came to your mind that you had just kidnapped a child, but you quickly pushed that thought aside. Was it really kidnapping if Eri was willing? You doubted it. Still, it didn't stop you from wondering if you were once again messing up the timeline. You had already done so much that had screwed up the original course of events.
You shook your head, not wanting to think about it. Not wanting to think about the deaths that you'd unintentionally caused.
You and Mirio walked the rest of the way back, and you found that you were grateful to be given the opportunity to save her like this. It made you feel like you had done something right. For the first time since Mustard had died, you really felt like everything was going to be okay.
You knew in your heart that it wasn't going to last.