ii | COUSIN GREG, ( rants...

By richiekirsch

5.8K 601 762

an altruistic breed of travel guide ( ryan x zendaya coleman ) ( book two of three !! ) More

[00]: she's meditating guys. she's died
[01]: who knows this one
[02]: the traspen anthem has been FOUND
[03]: rue bennett voice hey MA. i'm a genius!
[04]: spooky scary skeletons
[05]: he went for the head, holy shit
[06]: location?
[07]: sorry for all of the baseball. but what am i gonna do? not post this gif?
[08]: baseball fans are either super nice or really violent
[09]: goodnight everyone
[010]: back at it again at krispy kreme
[011]: 15 fun facts about me that you probably don't know
[012]: doing god's work
[013]: ryan, karma's coming. oh my god oh fuck they can't hear us
[014]: stan mr baby for clear skin
[015]: bruh look who goin switch stan lanes
[016]: yes it is their only mainstream song. yes i love it so much. we exist.
[017]: she knows me so well.
[018]: he has to earn back the right to my stan stamp
[019]: well
[020]: sad hours
[021]: SAY IT AIN'T SOOOO...
[022]: this just in; i am out of my mind
[023]: are you even on the WRITING GRIND bro
[024]: just gonna pretend like i don't love every single picture of him
[025]: stream one sweet world or perish
[026]: it's free therapy...
[027]: haha just kidding..... unless?
[028]: realizashun...
[029]: your free trial of ryan.com has ended
[030]: 2000's alt rock really gets me thinking
[031]: okay heterosexuals, you win this round
[032]: hippo campus wrote boyish about me
[033]: so?
[034]: bmc still goes hard
[035]: ight imma head in
[036]: (it ch2 spoilers) yall are just homophobic
[037]: help
[038]: #justryanthings...making shitty gifs for an original i will never publish
[039]: stop this game of mash i quit
[040]: It Must Be Protected From The Outside World...
[041]: reverting back to my seventh grade english class ways...
[042]: my favorite lesbians
[043]: NSJSHWBEBDHDJDJWJJSJD
[044]: i just thought up this joke...it kinda slaps
[045]: sad *bitch* hours
[046]: I Love Her With My Entire Being.
[047]: someone give this boy a goddamn dance class
[048]: Feeling Attacked.
[049]: unfortunate
[050]: i was attacked.
[051]: ight, imma head out ๐Ÿ˜” (small rant)
[052]: It Was...It Was...There Was....
[053]: is it #motivationmonday yet?
[054]: WOMEN. WOW.
[055]: gendryanation, u up?
[056]: CRAB RAVE
[057]: i'm going to loose serotonin
[058]: graphic design is not my passion.
[059]: fuck it
[060]: see, when i do clownery
[062]: local wattpad user on top of the world
[063]: find the trea
[064]: believe it or not, They Are Gay
[065]: i'm going to meet some of my favorite ppl, y'all want anything?
[066]: strategy! logic! teamwork!
[067]: .....unless?
[068]: am i okay? no. will i get over it? no.
[069, hehe]: alright, who let ryan on wattpad?
[070]: serious post about the nats win is coming later
[071]: my oc's, sweeties...
[072]: She...She...lich rally She
[073]: โ˜น
[075]: my hobbies include writing strong, independent female protagonists
[076]: somebody had lied to me several times.....
[077]: i love my baby yes i do
[078]: they're my favorite people
[079]: ๐Ÿคช remember when i actually updated this book? ๐Ÿคช
[080]: lowkey sad bops only...lowkey sad bops only baby
[081]: i fucking hate this situation ): (please read /:)
[082]: literally no one HMU
[083]: fat uwu. lich rally fat uwu, luv!
[084]: let us all talk about my baseball characters
[085]: Thinking Abt Jake Luppen. What A Legend. RIP
[086]: ight, imma be emo
[087]: RYANNATION GRABS BACK
[088]: *eric andre voice* cheers, i'll drink to that, bro
[089]: ryan: 1, the constraints of social anxiety: 0
[090]: they may be clowns, but they are MY clowns. shut up
[091]: come and dance with me, shorties of the wattpad universe
[092]: PARTY ROCK IS IN THE HOUSE TONIGHT
[093]: you have been STOPPED. ๐Ÿ–๐Ÿป๐Ÿ›‘๐Ÿšซ
[094]: thirsty thoughts. thirsty head.
[095]: baby-faced BFF check!
[096]: so, there is this ONE story...
[097]: i'm shaking n crying. you is the because
[098]: i thrive off of this Chaotic Energy.
[099]: I MEAN,,, LEMME ASK THE AUDIENCE.
[100]: i still cannot believe that d&d took them away from me.
[101]: he is a bi baby and you will ALL be stanning.
[102]: i made them Too Powerful,,, more nickander shit
[103]: houston, we have a bruh moment. ๐Ÿ˜
[104]: rip to the 2019 braeden community, but i'm different.
[105]: you're ugly, you're disgusting, i'm gonna kill you. give me $200.
[106]: working girl ๐Ÿคฉ
[107]: this is TOO on the nose, and that is NOT okay.
[108]: he's literally just vibin' doe...
[109]: i am such a FAKE STAN
[110]: cut the cameras.....DEADASS
[111]: damn, bitch. you live laugh love like this?
[112]: imma get you outta there!
[113]: fuck it. indie boy time
[114]: if i try my best, i may have a bf before valentine's day (NOT CLICKBAIT)
[115]: OH, THIS IS SO HUMILIATING...
[116]: i want to marry
[117]: clown check! (aka me begging for validation with my terrible selfies)
[118]: uh oh, stinky!
[119]: user treaturners retire bitch.
[120]: bullying single people is (john mulaney voice) NOT FUNN-AY!!!
[121]: you can either take this YEAST, or i'm callin' the POLICE.
[122]: fuck it. trying to look like an 80's punk rock band frontwoman
[123]: i have achieved a comedy
[124]: (me @ me) what are you? an idiot sandwich
[125]: fuck it. pug vibing to everything is not what it seems
[126]: can't stand the world series! ten minutes later; me and the trophy
[127]: all around me are familiar faces.....
[128]: do the math.
[129]: i truly believe that i have a thing for historical characters
[130]: i cant dodjehehris
[131]: what's the scoop? PENIS!
[132]: life is a party and i'm the pinata. (A CRY FOR YOUR ASSISTANCE.)
[133]: ladygagascreaminginastarisborn.mp4
[134]: FUCK IT. DYSTOPIAN HORROR GAYS
[135]: i really feel so fucked up. (a rant)
[136]: jesse & beca ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’“๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’๐ŸŽถ
[137]: guys who are either super soft and/or insane...YEAH THAT'S MY TYPE
[138]: ryan. ryan you need to STOP
[139]: procrastination won ๐Ÿ˜”
[140]: yelichnation rise
[141]: you thought it was over? HAH.
[142]: DOUBLE VIBE CHECK!
[143]: that's it; that's the entirety of buzzcut season.
[144]: hetero rights! ๐Ÿ˜˜โœจ
[145]: give me your youtube privileges.
[146]: jealousy is a disease, bitch. stay mad, XOXO ๐Ÿ’‹โœจ
[147]: this is a wendy's
[148]: he's hot, ur honor!
[149]: rian johnson RETURN MY PHONE CALLS
[150]: i have worms for brains
[151]: POV you read my terrible book idea and DIE IMMEDIATELY
[152]: remember when i used to write like THIS? yeah, neither do i
[153]: hoes sad ๐Ÿ˜ญ x24 (small rant)
[154]: I WANT TO SEE MY LITTLE BOY (HERE HE COMES)
[155]: PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEE
[156]: so it's y'all's choice...
[157]: YASS HOP ON #ryanisdeadparty
[158]: SPARE COOCHIE??? JUST A CRUMB, MA'AM?
[159]: mama didn't raise no bitch
[160]: THIS IS URGENT FOLKS
[161]: YELICHNATION WE JUST WENT DOWN ๐Ÿ™Š
[162]: who can say where the road goes
[163]: ryannation...lend me ur ear
[164]: (tw for blood, gore, and nosebleeds) I AM A MAKEUP MASTER
[165]: hot boys GET BEHIND ME!!!
[166]: (mlb rant incoming) sorry to these men
[167]: i'm never getting a s/o. ever. it's over for ryannation
[168]: sir. sir you're gonna have to stop making me sad. SIR,,,
[169]: tell me i don't have good taste AGAIN bitch
[170]: trea vance turner, excuse me um,,,
[171]: i'm not trying to ship real life people but ):
[172]: poe and hermes are my babies and i MUST protect them,,,
[173]: WANTED...for stealing my heart.
[174]: this is a PSA to PLEASE read boyish
[175]: i feel so soft and happy
[176]: POV: you're me, so I Beat You To Death
[177]: toni collette voice I JUST WANNA DIE
[178]: the end of the treaturners era...
[179]: r-rendon is gone...
[180]: yes i do love baseball...the stick and the grass and the bouncy sphere
[181]: i'm fucking GAY and i PISS and SHIT all over the place.
[182]: kan honey rory n all of the other st stans i โค๏ธ this is 4 u
[183]: [andy samberg voice] let's call it mixed reviews.
[184]: oh bROTHER, THIS GUY STINKS
[185]: just got diagnosed with genius syndrome
[186]: rip to jj abrams! but i'm! different!
[187]: go shawty, yo my baby! go shawty, yo my baby!
[188]: what the fuck!!! i miss baseball ๐Ÿ˜ฅ
[189]: young hayden christensen HOURS! ๐Ÿ˜š
[190]: eh oh, apestoso! ยกmierda!
[191]: don't care, didn't ask, plus i'm depressed and gay!
[192]: HSMTMTS STAN CHECK!
[193]: i feel...ANGER.
[194]: (adam driver voice) WELL THEN YOU DON'T HAVE TO LOOK AT THEM ANYMORE!
[195]: jk rowling ma'am, this is my emotional support het couple
[196]: another psychological thriller idea...i SAID murderous hot people rights
[197]: ALEXA PLAY FLAMING HOT CHEETOS BY CLAIRO (ryan love life update!!!)
[198]: long live the treaturners era ๐Ÿ˜”โœจโค๏ธ stan nicholas braun!

[199]: last chapter of this ๐Ÿ˜”...here is some stuff abt satirical assassins story

28 1 2
By richiekirsch











the story is called this world won't find you again. basically, the book is about a thirteen year-old named annette "nettie" bailey, who lost her three brothers while visiting family in brooklyn, new york, after they botched a deal with a gang of loan sharks. infuriated and inspired, nettie grew up to establish an assassins agency named brooklyn brothers, and as her three children (cecily, devon, and george) grew up, she slowly leaned them into the idea of joining the..."family business". however, the only idea that seems to be standing between the three siblings and sweet, pure, unadulterated carnage and chaos, is the fact that george made a promise with his childhood friend to defend her from the exact same crime bosses who have been on his family's trail for years.












here is the main cast (so far)!




brett grey as george bailey

CODENAME : geyser

naive, slightly gullible, kind-hearted (to a fault), soft-spoken, flies under the radar quite easily, loyal, devoted








zendaya coleman as cecily bailey

CODENAME : the cactus

cynical, cocky, just charismatic enough, witty, cunning, a natural leader









storm reid as devon bailey

CODENAME : deal with it

cold, collected, unnaturally calm, always prepared for the worst of events to occur, dangerously protective, a bit of a kleptomaniac.








haley lu richardson as elliot adams

CODENAME : well...she's the childhood friend

snarky, sarcastic, world wary, sharply street smart, personable, warm, a bit intimidating, welcoming.







florence pugh as ezra adams

CODENAME : the edge


quiet, keeps her issues to herself, more than ready to take someone out without a second thought, calculating, usually the brains behind an operation







nicholas braun as kanaan koening

CODENAME : surprise attack

mild-mannered, FAR too well-intentioned, kind, gentle, and sweet-hearted with an added bonus witty side.






park so-dam as ha yoon kim

CODENAME : digger

athletic, bubbly, charming, an expert conniver, effortlessly amazing in whatever she does, often overtly brave









tessa thompson as annette "nettie" bailey

CODENAME : the netting

fiercely loving, overprotective, more than willing to be a mentor, loves to take charge, always trying her best no matter what








thomas mann as emmett adams

CODENAME : ender

very mischievous, a bit of a jokester, master manipulator, excellent at disguises and faking his identities, fantastic at getting under one's skin, can easily take down an opponent






zoey deutch as ellen-rose adams

also known as : the skeptical sister

judgmental by nature, flirtatious, always carrying herself like a politician, always sees through facades, thrives on her own








with daisy ridley as kathryn "kat" koening

CODENAME : kite

loves to oversee missions, usually serves as a voice of reason, loves to dole out advice, fairly kind, an overachiever, the mom friend







and timothée chalamet as alexander "al" koening

also known as : too good "for his own good"

kind, far too loving, trusting until the end, flirtatious, a bit lustful, effortlessly good, always keeps up his best possible morals

















🤩🥰✨✨

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ููŠุตู„ ุจุญุฏู‡ ูˆุนุตุจูŠู‡ ู†ุทู‚: ุงู† ู…ุงุฎุฐูŠุชูƒ ูˆุฑุจูŠุชูƒ ู…ุงูƒูˆู† ูˆู„ุฏ ู…ุญู…ุฏ ุงู„ูˆุฌุฏ ุจุจุฑูˆุฏ ูˆุนู†ุงุฏ : ุงู† ู…ุงุฑูุถุชูƒ ู…ุงูƒูˆู† ุจู†ุช ุชุฑูƒูŠ !