Let's face it -- it happens to all of us. We ask for a review, and we get a review that takes our self-esteem, shoves it into a blender with some asparagus, and then throws all three -- the blender, asparagus, and self-esteem -- into a volcano.
However, there are ways to cope with these reviews. In this chapter, we will discuss the yays and nays of facing harsh reviews. But before we launch into that, my dear co-writer, Painite, would like to present you with a story from the Bible of Reviewers.
Once upon a time (I just went through the cliché route of storytelling, didn't I?) there was a dragon who loved reading books and blowtorching people. One day, a fair maiden decided to ask the beast for assistance.
"Hey, can I ask for a review?" she asked.
"Sure," replied the dragon.
I'm sure most of you reading know that most reviewers require payment for the work they do. The dragon just wanted the lady to read and comment on a story it had written. All was good and peaceful, they became Wattpad friends and stuff...
Until the day of reckoning (or, well, blowtorching) came.
I guess that lady didn't think it was necessary for her to wear armour to begin with. What she was dealing with was a Soul Reaper type reviewer (I don't know if she checked my previous reviews or not) that charred her book all the way down.
Um, to be fair, it was seriously cliche, with the woman being all, "I'm independent!" but crumbles down so easily when the (hot) guy comes. The pace was too fast -- it gave the poor dragon whiplash and a splitting headache. And boy, don't even get me started on the grammar. (Going on a rant here...)
Anywho, after that, the maiden messaged Queen Sunshine right away, asking her to take down the dragon's review. The reason? She was afraid the book would lose reads if her other readers (or potential readers) saw it.
"Um, we need the dragon's permission first," Queen Sunshine said, already messaging the reaper.
"No way," answered the dragon right away.
And yes, the woman was seriously persistent. She said it wouldn't be a problem since she flood-voted the story anyway, so we should just chuck the reviews we worked so hard on into the trashcan when someone doesn't like it. That woman even went as far as screaming in the screen. Does it sound fair? I don't know, but I still stood my -- oops, I mean, the dragon still stood its ground.
The two went on it for weeks before the other party suddenly went silent.
Legend has it that the cursed, blowtorched review still lies in the depths of the Sapphire Review Store...
... And yep, Sunshine here to confirm that it does. I only remove reviews after receiving permission from both parties, unless the review was unreasonably rude and unprofessional. In this case, the review was actually quite professional and, though blunt, was not even near rude.
Which leads us into the content of the chapter: what should you do if you're not happy with a review? Should you scream at the reviewer? No. Should you eat ice cream? Yes. You should always eat ice cream.
So, without any further ado, here are the ten commandments!
Let's talk about what you should not do first:
1. Thou shalt not degrade other people's stories to make thyself feel better.
It's human nature to compare our work to others. I've once had someone openly confess that they read my story looking for something bad about it, just so that they had something to cling on to if I gave them an unpleasant review. While I appreciated the honesty, I have to say that is the worst way possible to handle a review.
First of all, it's not nice to downgrade other people's work. It's setting up a rather toxic pattern, really. Second of all, it does not help anyone if you read stories with the intention of shaming them. In fact, you should read other stories to see what you like about those stories -- then, you learn from those stories.
2. Thou shalt not delete your story straight away.
If you feel like you want to unpublish it, sure. But do not delete your precious, precious words. For one, reviewers on Wattpad are just human, too. We are not perfect. Our advice is not perfect. This is a subjective industry, and you should never delete a story because the review put you down. You may come to regret it.
Additionally, it's always beneficial to have copies of the first draft to look over. You can pinpoint your errors, you can work out exactly how to fix it up, and at the end of the day, those drafts are almost like your stepping stones to greatness. Cherish them.
3. Thou shalt not take it as a personal attack.
Unless your reviewer is a sadistic little snot, they literally gain nothing out of hurting people's feelings. So, contrary to popular belief, if your reviewer gives you a harsh review, it probably has nothing to do with them not liking you. They just want you to improve. They just want to help you.
Of course, there may be the rare reviewer who does take pleasure in crushing other people. If this is the case, please tag me (Sunshine) in their review of your story so I can have a word with them.
4. Thou shalt not ask for the review to be removed.
Unless, of course, it is rude, unprofessional, or contains intense spoilers. Reviewers work really hard on their reviews -- with most being easily over 1000+ words from my review store. It's honestly quite hurtful when we're told that our reviews will be deleted.
But that's not the only reason why you shouldn't delete it.
Let's say that the review was harsh, but it had some very valid points. It is incredibly beneficial to keep the review there so you can refer back to it one day. Additionally, if you disagree with the review and want a second opinion, it is a good idea to keep it there so that friends -- or anyone who is giving you that second opinion -- can look over it and see whether they agree or not.
5. Thou shalt not disrespect/ghost the reviewer.
A very personal pet peeve of mine is uploading a review, knowing that the author has seen it (maybe they drop a vote, or maybe they're active after you post and tag them in the review), and having them not say a single word to you. Even a short 'thanks' or 'hi' or 'hey, I like asparagus' would be great. Do not leave us hanging like that, please! It's so incredibly frustrating. We don't know how you've taken the review, we don't know whether it was helpful, we don't even know if we've accidentally reviewed the wrong story or something.
So, please, don't ghost us. Don't be that third corner of the love triangle after the other two get together.
Additionally, don't disrespect the reviewer. Don't insult them -- after all, you asked for the review. Why would you insult them for it? Also, don't publicly shame them on your profile page. That's just mean. Do we deserve it for giving you a blunt review? No. Because no one deserves to deal with toxic behaviour.
Now, I know what you're thinking: surely, these are all exaggerated points. No one really disrespects other people like this. No one really degrades other people's stories.
Well, let me tell you a story that happened only a few months ago. I clearly remember running to Painite -- both laughing and sobbing -- about it. The funny thing? My 'review' had been exceptionally polite. I'm not called ray of sunshine for nothing.
It was for The Monthly Gemstone Awards, and someone hadn't made the shortlist. They said they were disappointed, and I sent them a message stating why they hadn't made it through to the next round. Let's call them Cauliflower, yeah?
First thing Cauliflower did was disagree with every point I made. Then, they went on to say that all their friends said (and she quoted them) "this story is amazing!".
Once again, I gently stated my points again and reinforced why rushed characterisation, incorrect punctuation, and fluctuating tenses was not okay. I even offered to have a fellow reviewer look over the story and provide feedback.
That's when things got... weird.
Cauliflower refused the second opinion. But she didn't stop there. She also went on to insult me, saying that I was not a 'good reader/reviewer', and that I didn't know how to read between the lines (ouch! Sunshine needed a therapy session with ice cream after that).
Just as I was about to accept that maybe I was a piss-poor reviewer, Cauliflower went on to insult other books that had made the shortlist. Not only did she go through some of the shortlisted books and pick them apart, but she went as far to say, "How can I be happy if stories that honestly aren't better than mine make it?????"
Sunshine was not impressed.
So, as it turns out, people do break those five commandments above. And, believe me, you're not doing anyone a favour. You're making yourself look like a rotten piece of cauliflower.
Instead, here are the five commandments of what you should do when faced with a rather harsh review:
1. Thou shalt give yourself a few days to sit back, breathe, and recover.
This is so ridiculously important. In the heat of the moment, you might want to scream and tear your hair out and move countries and become a farmer (what is with me a vegetables today, seriously?). But don't do any of those. Instead, sit back and breathe. Reflect. Ask yourself the following:
- What was I expecting from the review? Had I been expecting more compliments? Is that why I'm upset?
- What did I not like about the review? Was it the way they phrased things? Or am I just a little hurt that they didn't like my protagonist?
- Did the reviewer make valid points? Am I qualified enough to say that they didn't? Are the points they made subjective or objective?
Then, go back and face the review with a clear head.
2. Thou shalt ask the reviewer to clarify points you are unsure of.
If there are things you are unsure of, you should always try to ask to reviewer to elaborate. More often than not, your reviewer should be more than happy to oblige. Ask them to explain their points, or even ask them for suggestions. They're here to help. They want you to get better.
3. Thou shalt ask for a second opinion.
If you are still unhappy with the review, there is no shame in asking for a second opinion.
However, do not ask your best friend or your story's biggest fan. You want it to be as unbiased as possible. Try asking another reviewer (preferably, one you know that is reliable). Refer them to the initial review, and compare their points with the points that the first reviewer made. Are they similar? Starkly different?
And maybe it's not the contents of the review that concern you, but the presentation of it. Maybe you think they make valid points, but they need to work on their phrasing -- there's a difference between saying, "Your characterisation could use some work" and, "Your writing sucks, you need to go back to third grade and eat more carrots."
If that's the case, ask for a second opinion. Ask for another reviewer to take a look at that first review, and ask them if they thought the review was rude/unprofessional.
4. Thou shalt provide feedback to the reviewer.
Let's say it is the phrasing that needs work. Please, let them know. Help them improve. Gently tell them that, while you appreciated the review, it would be beneficial to tone down the ferocity by a notch or two. Some review stores leave room for you to provide feedback, so use them to your advantage!
If the reviewer works for a community account, you can also let the admin know, too, that you thought their review was unreasonably harsh. It's all about sending feeback! Otherwise, nothing will change.
5. Thou shalt remember that writing is a learning process.
Trust me, everyone will get a bad review some day. For some of us, we will get a bad review about our reviewing. That's just how life is. That's how we will learn.
So, unless the review was unreasonably rude, take it with an open mind. Take it with a big grin on your face, because now you know where you can improve. You can conquer the world, basically. (Okay, maybe a few more steps -- but soon!)
And writing is subjective. I posted a short story for a competition -- in one competition, it scored 100/100. In the other, it came last place. That's just the way the writing world is -- subjectivity is everywhere. And it's important that we embrace that.
And that ends the contents of this chapter! Please remember that if you do need post-review therapy, I am more than willing to have a chat with you -- but please don't ask me to read/review your entire story, as I'm still catching up on my list. I'm more than happy to have a look to see if the review was phrased professionally, and have a word with the reviewer if it was not -- or at least offer tips, if the reviewer failed to do so.
Additionally, keep the stories coming! I'm excited to hear them all. I seriously live for the drama.
In the next chapter, we will talk about run-on sentences (and how to stop them from running). If you have any specific requests, let me know! I need 101 chapters, after all.