"My baby girl is graduating." My dad sobs, cupping my cheeks as I roll my eyes at him playfully, giggling lightly at his state.
My mom runs inside the living room in only her bra and I have to scowl as she holds up a crop top and a blouse. "Slutty or Not-ty?" she asks, worry etch in her face for some odd reason. It's not like she has to impress anyone, she has Dad for god's sake.
Dad taps his chin and points at her bra-clad body. "Hot mommy." He says, winking at my mom as she grins and winks back, making me want to throw up. My dad chuckles and points back at the blouse. "Definitely the not-ty, don't want any dilfs staring at what's mine."
I arch an eyebrow at him. "Did you just say dilf?" I ask, frowning as I stick my tongue out in disgust. "Can we go before I miss my own graduation?" I laugh, already walking out of the front door as mom and dad rushes around like children. God, it's my graduation, no biggie.
During the car ride to my school, the only thing I could think about was Chaeyoung. Why? Because unlike me, who have amazing parents, an awesome picture-taking inside the house and great conversations, Chaeyoung's probably at her lonely house, waking up to no one, wearing the Academic dress and hat by herself, smiling to no picture taking and walking to school all alone. Shit, she's walking to school today—I'm pretty sure Joy wont stop by to pick her up. I hold my hand out and point to a corner, getting curious looks from my parents.
"Can we please stop by Chaeyoung's?" I ask, giving my mom a pointed look as she frowns at me. "Don't ask, just go please? It's right there."
When we reach Chaeyoung's house and I'm nervously knocking on her door, I'm greeted by the sight of Alice opening it with a shocked smile. "Yeoboseyo Lisa."
"A-Alice," I breathe, blinking a couple of times. "Hi," I wave at her awkwardly and she giggles.
"If you're wondering where Rosie is, she's changing upstairs, do you want to wait for her?" she asks me with a proud smile, probably happy that she's celebrating this moment with Chaeyoung as I slowly shake my head, declining her offer. I bend down to pluck a small flower from her front yard and give it to Alice.
"Tell her good luck and congrats?" I barely even know what I'm saying anymore as Alice smirks up at me like she knows something and nods, taking it from my lithe fingers. I hug her goodbye and walk back to my parent's car, ignoring my mom's lecture the entire way to school.
Little do I know, as soon as Alice's presenting the flower to Chaeyoung, she's crying all over again.
Time runs by so fast when you're graduating, you say hi to people, hug classmates, make inside jokes with students you've been classmates with since kindergarten and it's all so funny because just yesterday, we didn't want to get to know any of the other, but now, not it feels like we regret every moment of bullying and hurting.
Of wasting time.
So when Joy walks up to me and brings me in for a hug, I hug her back just as tight. She lets go and winks at me. "I can't wait to see you in NYU, Lisa." She says, waving at a few friends as she leaves me with a sobbing Nayeon, who I think shouldn't cry as much because she only transferred this year.
I see Chaeyoung amidst the crowd of seniors, not even fighting the smile off my lips as I spot the small white flower attached to her ear when she smiles at something one of her cheerio friends tell her, her brown eyes shining that brightness she lost months ago. She feels my gaze and turns to me, her nose scrunching up as she waves at me cutely. And don't be mad at me because I'm feeling super sentimental right now, but I couldn't help grin, wave back and wink at her as I take my seat, not missing the way her blush flutters across her tan cheeks.
"Please sit down." Our principal says, and again, time's so fast that we're already on that segment where we hand over the diplomas. But there's something I have to do that I've been planning, and writing, and practicing for days.
My Valedictorian speech.
"Before we begin, we'd like to call upon Lalisa Manoban, this batch's Valedictorian, to start and end us with words of her own." He smiles and I'm shocked by the amount of claps I receive from the entire hall. It's really different now, it's not about who's higher in the social ladder, no, it's about us as equals.
I stand up shyly and groan when I hear my mom hollering and my dad woofing like animals where they sit on the bleachers. I climb up the steps and take a deep breath, scanning my surroundings. I chuckle and accept the microphone being given to me and in the first time in years, I feel higher than I've ever been, even greater than Sungjin.
"Thanks Principal Yang," I start off politely, earning a nod from him. I grab the paper I've written my speech on and unfold it, flashing a bright smile.
"Honestly, I didn't expect I'd be standing here in front of all of you now, I mean, I worked hard to be where I am today but I couldn't have done it without any of you." I receive weird looks but a shock face from Nayeon as I quote her. "Why? Because each of you has done something to make me who I am today, actually each one of us inspires the other in ways we don't know. Like when Sungjin gave my first slushy, it made me stronger." I couldn't believe I was saying this to the whole student body but it felt great, it was my last time to do this and I'll end it with a bang. And it's awesome to see Sungjin's eyes go wide in horror. "Or how Jisoo told me to never lose hope." She smiles, intertwining her fingers with Nayeon. "Or how Nayeon who just came into this school, made me know that making friends is as easy as pie." I earn a few laughs and Nayeon rolls her eyes at me. "It can be JBI—" I gulp, forcing myself to not sound too cheeky. "—who taught me the ways of hard journalism, that everything's as tough as it goes. Then, to Wooyoung, that sometimes a friend can stab you in the back." The wheelchair boy gasps, earning a smug smirk from Jisoo as she winks at my direction, thankful. "Next we have Jennie, who shows to everyone that there are many cheaters in the world and we need to be careful." Jennie glares at me and I laugh.
"You see this batch of people are shaping us to who we are and who we're going to be. Each one of us are affected because like it or not, we are one." I smile through my words and fight off the tears as I go on. "Let's not forget how Park Sooyoung showed me that even those who you think is out to get you, are actually one of the few people who might care about you the most." Joy raises her hand and gets a lot of laughs.
I'm just nearing the end of my speech as I take a deep breath. This wasn't meant to be part, I wasn't supposed to add her into this, but I couldn't help myself, she helped me through every path of my life. Ever since kindergarten, and she didn't even know it.
"And lastly, to Park Chaeyoung," I meet her brown eyes as she stares deeply into mine. "For teaching me how to fall in love, defend myself when someone gangs up on me, made me believe that I am truly beautiful, and for being that one person I know, become the biggest treasure of my life. I wouldn't be here today if it weren't for you, and—" I clear my throat, sucking my lips in. "I love you."
The gym goes quiet as everyone's head turns to the Korean, whose eyes are wide and her mouth open agape. There are tears starting on the corner of her eyelids as I wipe my face to clear any droplets.
"Going on," I cut in, but still, a few are staring at Chaeyoung, wondering what the hell I'm saying. "I thank the teachers too for sticking up to our rebellious acts. I thank Mrs. Solar for being the second mother of my life." She claps at me, smiling proudly. "And lastly, I just thank you SM High School Batch 2015! It's an amazing journey with you all and I can't wait to see where the future will lead us all, to us!" I cheer, raising a fist as they all shout and throw their hands in the air as well. "To us!" I repeat, grabbing the end of my hat as I throw it upwards, signaling a lot of them to do so.
Soon, diplomas are being given away; I got my award from Mrs. Solar after my speech and received flowers from the faculty. Now, I am currently sitting on my chair, avoiding the intense gaze from behind me as I can tell its coming from Chaeyoung.
No matter if she broke my heart or not, I cannot say I don't love her because I do, and if this really is the last time I'll ever see her, why not set everything out on the table?
We're now hugging, saying our goodbyes and taking our pictures with anybody we get the chance with. It's the first time a lot of people wanted to take a picture with me and I feel so flattered. Time does run by so fast, and as soon as I get my family picture with my parents, someone's tapping my back. I face the person and smile when I see its Alice. She engulfs me in a hug and lets go after a second.
"That was the sweetest thing I've ever heard in my entire life." She whispers softly, mentioning my speech as I blush. "You don't know how lucky Chaeyoung is to have you." And it also seems like Chaeyoung hasn't told Alice about our big fight.
I force a smile when said person of our conversation walks up to me and lets out a breathe of fresh air. She nibbles on her lower lip and smiles weakly at me. "Your speech was beautiful." She tells me in a low voice, and in the corner of my eye, I see my parents stomping their way over to me but luckily, Alice's distracting them now.
"Thank you." I reply shyly, tucking a lose strand of hair behind my ear. "It was hard at first, I didn't know what to say but—but I got there." I stammer, avoiding her eyes when I feel her soft fingers touching my skin, tilting my chin up so we could hold our gazes. And god, I hate and love her eyes.
"You were amazing." She goes on, giggling lightly. "I literally cried—and—" she gulps licking her lips. "Did you mean what you said?" she asks, uncertain.
Slowly, I nod my head, sighing when I feel her hands cup my cheeks and caress them smoothly. "Every word," I exhale, sucking in my breath when I feel her presence closer.
"You know," she chuckles, nudging her nose with mine as I let a smile grace my lips. "You just like, confessed your love to me in front of the whole school." She teases, eyeing me with an intense stare. "When I thought you didn't love me anymore."
And this was the hard part.
I grab her fingers and let her let go of my face, bringing them down to waist level as I wring our digits together, a worried expression haunting her face.
"Chaeyoung, I do love you. I did say I meant every word but," I gulp, tilting my head to the side. "But I don't want to be with you."
Chaeyoung's hands drop from mine and she takes a step back, almost like my touch stings her. And no, she can't do that to me, not when I've done something to try and fix us but she's here being such a coward. "What?" she hisses, clucking her tongue.
I sigh and rub my forehead. "I need to get away from you," I continue, peeking at her through my hands that start to cover my face. "I think we need space. And, New York is the perfect reason why. I don't know if you're off to Louisville—"
"I was going to UCLA, but I decided to just go with you to New York after I heard your speech, don't you want us to be together?" she asks, exasperated.
I take her fingers with mine and grip them tightly, not wanting her to think badly of me. "Rosie, don't do that—it's great that you're going to UCLA, I'm proud of you, but don't follow me." I beg, closing my eyes for a second. "We need to give each other space. I'm going to concentrate on my studies and I don't want our messed up relationship to keep us from being happy. We're broken Chaeng, and we need a break." I explain to her, stopping the sobs.
Santana whimpers. "B-But I love you, Lisa."
My heart hammers inside my chest at having to hear that from her, for the first time in forever, I felt so complete and happy. She loves me back.
"And I can't do without you, can you not see that? I'm shit, without you, I fucking drink like crazy and do things that'll get me sent to jail if I wasn't a high school underage student." She growls, throwing her hands in the air to emphasize it. "I need you in my life."
"Chaeyoung, as much as I want to run away with you, I don't think it's going to solve anything." I huff, clucking my tongue.
"For god's sake, you ditched me on our first date for some reason I don't know of, and you expect me not to think you wont do it on our second or third? Maybe tenth? As much as I want to take the risk with you, I'm not ready, not now."
"Lisa I ditched you because someone was threatening me to reveal your secret about your—" she comes close, her mouth near my ear "—penis."
I push her away and stare at her. "That's why you didn't show up?" I hiss, gritting my teeth together. "That's why? Oh god, just because someone found out about my dick and wanted to expose it to the school so you didn't go to our date because of that?"
Chaeyoung's jaw drops. "I was protecting you."
"Chaeng—" I grunt, clenching my jaw. "I don't care if the whole student body found out about my penis," I say, shaking my head. "You'd think I'd care if the exchange for that was going to an amazing date with you? Go tell whoever that is to expose my secret and I wouldn't mind because I'm with you and that's all it matters."
"Y-You—How dare you say that what I did was wrong?" she growls, her face hard and stoic. "I did that out of love because shitheads like the jocks were going to make your life a living hell, Lisa, and all I get is a I wouldn't care anyways?"
This fight was getting too heated for a graduation day.
"I'm really thankful you did that for me, Chaeng." I start off slowly, sighing. "But yes, I wouldn't care anyways because it was the last 3 months of school and our time—our relationship was wasted over that."
Chaeyoung hums and chuckles sarcastically. "Maybe next time I should ask you what's right or wrong before I think of protecting you from mean shit." she bites bark sharply, steam coming out of her ears before her eyes drop and she's starting to cry again. "Why can't you just see that I love you? And I just want us to start over again?"
I sigh and shake my head. "Not now, not at once after all this when I'm even trying to process it." I shout, waving my hand off. "We need to get away from each other, Chaeng."
She whimpers and pleads with me. "Please Lili, don't do this. I love you and you're the only one for me out there, I swear."
I smile sadly at her and cup her cheek, smoothing out her skin as I lean in and kiss her lightly on the lips. God, how I miss those lips of hers. "If we're meant to be, then we'll find each other." I say softly, kissing her again as she moans. "And if it's fate, I'll see you again."
Chaeyoung's hands drop down to my waist as she pulls me into a hug. "L-Lisa," she sobs, burying her face on the crook of my neck as I sigh. "I love you." she breathes, her voice so broken and lost.
I tighten my hold on her and smile sadly. "I know, I love you too."
"Is that the last of your stuff?" Jisoo asks as she slams the back hood of the cab shut, waiting outside of my house containing all my suitcases. I nod and adjust the cap on top of my head, fixing it just right.
"That's all." I say, smiling as she wraps Nayeon into a hug and gives her a light kiss on the lips. They're staying in Ohio as long as they can before they need to go to do their own registrations and sorting out. Jisoo's off to LA and Nayeon's going to meet up with me in NYC when she leaves Ohio.
I turn to my parents and roll my eyes when I see them crying. I open my arms out to signal a hug and they immediately grab me, sobbing like a bunch of babies. "Oh god, I'll be back for a lot of visits." I tease, wiping the tears out of my mother's face as she pouts at me.
"It's just going to be really weird without our little Lili to tease about sex and stuff." She whines, grabbing at my dad's collar as she whisper to him, "Should we buy a cat and name it Lili number two?"
Chuckling my dad gives me a proud look. "I'm so proud of you, Lili, you've made us so—"
"—happy—" my mom cries out, blowing her nose on a napkin as I cringe at the sound.
"Thanks—" I get cut off by mom pointing a mad finger at me.
"And you young lady, I'm still mad at you for never mentioning us on your speech—have we not paid for all your expenses?"
Dad nods his head. "Thoroughly disappointed in that."
I roll my eyes and giggle. "You were a part of my speech, I just—got jumbled and forgot to say it."
"Well, how would you feel if we'd forget you?" my mom says, frowning. I chuckle and give them both kisses on the face as I wave goodbye and approach my two best friends by the cab.
"It's not goodbye, Jisoo." I tease, watching her fight the tears like a man as she whines.
"Damn, I wish I signed up for a scholarship in NYC, you and Nayeon are going to be there—why can't I?" she complains, huffing.
I shrug my shoulders. "That's your fault." I joke, earning a slap from her as Nayeon grins up at me. "See you in a few days?" I ask, making her nod her head as I lean in and give them a bear-crushing hug.
They go to step beside my parents as I climb inside the cab and sigh sadly; depressed to see—or rather, not see Chaeyoung on my last day in Ohio. I thought she'd at least say goodbye to me, I am in a lost love for her after all.
When I'm at the airport, almost heading inside, I'm stop in my tracks when I spot Chaeyoung standing by the entrance walls with a sign and a bouquet of flowers on her right hand. I giggle and nibble on my lower lip as I stroll towards her.
Fuck you NYC.
It was written in bold black letters, and I couldn't help myself as I throw my head back and laugh at this sign. I cock my hip to the side and chuckle lowly. "Fuck you NYC?" I ask, arching an eyebrow.
Chaeyoung nods cheekily and hands me the flowers on her arms, causing a gasp to escape my lips, as it looks familiar. It's the same bouquet I was supposed to give her on our date. "Yeah, fuck NYC for keeping you away from me." She jokes, licking her lips. "Are you sure I can't come with you? I can buy a plane ticket now."
I roll my eyes and shake my head. "No, Chaeng, space remember? And no texting too, we might just fight again, especially since I'm not over the reason why you ditched me on our date. That hurt a lot you know."
Chaeyoung sighs and pouts. "I know, I know—but Lis, I wont see you and hear from you? That's a bit too much."
I waggle my finger in front of her, smirking. "Let fate takes its course, alright? For now, we're setting each other free." I say, smiling.
"Dammit, you should stop reading romance books and watching TV, it's infecting your mind with fantasies." She jokes, staring deeply into my eyes as I chew on my lower lip. "I guess, I'll see you soon?"
"I really hope so." I reply, giggling lightly.
"You're really going to make me work my ass to get you back, huh?" she sighs, a small smirk evident on her lips.
I grin toothily and hum, tapping my chin. "I might just get a girl while I'm there."
Chaeyoung gasps and I clutch my stomach to stop laughing. "You wouldn't dare."
"I would, so you have a lot of working to do."
Chaeyoung grins and tilts her head to the side. "In that case, since I wont be buying that ticket," she hums, flipping the cardboard sign.
I love you,
Sighing out of love, I roll my eyes at her. "I love you too." I breathe, licking my lips. "So much."
4 years later......
——————
To be continued.....