After his talk with Mark, Perth have been trying to contact Saint but his calls are not going through.
"P' must be mad.." he thought.
Perth is driving to school while stealing glances at his phone to see if any of his messages have been replied.
Stopping at the red light Perth hit his stearing wheel feeling angry at his own stupidity.
Why did his insecurity made him blinded, Saint is the only one that sees him, love him for who he is.
Ignoring Saint without giving an explanation on why he did it must've confuse him.
This has been Perth's problem wherever he goes. He always kept quiet regardless of what he is feeling. People assumes he didnt care about anything or anyone because he always just go along without giving his opinion.
He didnt want to trouble anyone, he'd rather go along than disagree to avoid any conflict, but by doing so people thought he is inconsiderate and only think about himself.
He remembered once when he was staying in the dorm during high school, his roommates tried to engage him in conversation and any activities but because of his personality he always refused as he is comfortable just staying in the room.
Soon his roommate stop asking him out, he even stop talking to Perth and acted as if he didnt exist. Maybe it is Perth who is the problem for not talking.
Even if he wanted to fix everything he didnt get to do it as he missed his chance and was transfered to another school.
And the same thing happened at his new school at first people tried talking to him but because he cant keep any of the conversation going people just stop talking to him.
He ended up not having any friend his age. Of course he is grateful for his brothers for tolerating him and accepting him. But he still felt lonely that he didnt make an effort to have a good relationship with his peers.
And now he was about to make the same mistake, but worst if he didnt do anything this time he would lose the only person that love him as he is.
~~~~~~~~~~~~(๑'╹‸╹'๑)~~~~~~~~~~~
Perth waited nervously outside of the Economic's building looking back and forth between his phone and the building entrance.
Saint still havent replied to him, so his only chance was to catch Saint after his class.
Looking up from scrolling through his messages, he saw Saint coming through the door. Perth felt guilty when he saw Saint, he seemed sad and tired, he just nodded towards people who greets him without the usual smile he always had.
Perth clutches his chest, feeling it tighthen at what he had done to his Saint because of his own stupid insecurity.
Perth decided to fix everything and with that determination he step forward towards Saint and was about to call out to him when someone called him first.
"Saint!"
Perth stopped in his track and watch Saint turn around and saw P'Bank running after Saint.
He stop infront of Saint and saw P'Bank smile happily at him ad ruffles Saints hair.
Perth cant hear their conversation from where he is standing, but he can make out from what he saw that P'Bank had ask Saint to go somewhere.
Saint hesitate at first and look around him, when Perth saw this, he hid himself behind one of the column.
When Saint didnt saw what he was looking for, he decided to go with P'Bank.
When Perth saw them walk towards him, Perth turn around and shows his back to them.
Perth can hear Saint laugh happily at something P'Bank said as they passed by him. He turn back and watch Saint dissapear together with P'Bank.
Sliding himself down on the floor, Perth hide his head in his arm all his insecurity, guilt and sadness came back and he cant seem to stop his tears.
Seeing Saint face lift up at seeing P'Bank and laugh happily with him, hurt because he only make him sad.
"Stupid Perth.."
"Stupid! Stupid!"
Perth kept hitting his head with his hand he wanted to hurt himself for the things he did.
"You had one chance and you blew it!"
Perth lift his head up still with tears in his eyes and laugh and laugh and laugh..
Laughing at the situation that he put himself through. Laughing at the irony of hurting Saint even when he said not to.
Laughing for losing Saint because of his own stupidity.
Crying for losing someone who knew and love the real him....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(ﾟヘﾟ)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So.... Um... I'm back
Pls dont kill me hehehe..
I was not in a good place when I wrote this but I hope you guys enjoy it..
Now that I'm back I will ne updating my fics (hopefully) regularly as before.
So... Until next time.