~Reira~
Alsono cried... She cried hard. It was hard to watch. But I couldn't leave the room. She was so broken. And I remember the feeling of that brokeness. It hurts. Like someone kicked you in the tummy when you were really hungry. Except it lasts a long time. Alsono hid in her pillow and curled up in a ball, shaking violently. Something in her is broken. So broken that she told Choji to leave. That's as broken as she can get.
I sat next to her and reached out a hand to touch her hair. I love her hair. It's long and straight, a shiney silver color. She turned her head to look at me the moment my hand touched her hair. Her eyes were red and starting to swell. But she was still pretty. Al is always pretty. Even with scars, she is more pretty.
"What am I doing Rei?" She whinned. I only touched her hair to calm her. "Everything is different now. I can't cook anything without screaming and cowering in fear. That's all I've ever known, it's my only real skill! What am I supposed to do? How can anything be the same anymore? How can I face Choji like this?" Her words came into my mind slow like everyone's, mixed together, but still understood after a quick thought.
"This is... about Choji?" I asked. She squeezed he eyes shut and nodded. "Why?"
But Al didn't answer me. She laid next to me and let a new stream of tears flow.
My head hurts. It hurt yesterday too. It's not bad, but it's harder to think now. I used to be better at understanding. But my head hurts. Al's words were slower today, more mushed together in my mind. My own words I couldn't think of as quickly. Is it the headache? Or is it Al? She's the one I talked to the most. But since the fire I've been sitting quietly with Shikamaru.
I think of Shikamaru a lot. He's always there for me. And my face got hot thinking of this morning. Al put her head on my lap and hugged my middle as she cried. I petted her pretty hair. It's soft... like a bunny. She laid across my lap and started to calm down.
"Alsono?" Choji's voice came from the other side of the door. He sounded sad. But he also sounded like he wasn't going to give up. "Al, can we please talk about this? Will you let me in?" Alsono hugged me tighter. "Please Alsono, I love you. I know that you're hurt, but if you let me help you... maybe you will get better? And even if you don't I will still love you."
Something in what he said hit me as well. Choji loves Alsono no matter what. Would Shikamaru love me no matter what? I thought about him... his small smiles... his warm hugs... the way he blushes when we hold hands. I love him. And he loves me. But how far does love reach?
That's when I knew what to say to help Alsono. She cried still, her face in my belly, arms around me. And I continued to pet her hair. "Once... Shikamaru told me... that it didn't matter... that I was... brain damaged. He said... he loved me... just the way... I was. Before that... I told myself... that I couldn't love him. Because there's no... way he would... love someone... who is damaged... like me. But he told me... not to think... like that. With all... my faults and... all my damages... he fell in love... with me. Me."
She looked up at me with red and puffy eyes. But she was listening. She was letting it hit her. "Choji loves... you. And no matter... your faults... no matter... your damages... he will love you... just the same. You are... Alsono... whether you can cook... or not."
Al smiled and hugged me tighter before letting go and running to the door. She flung it open and threw her arms around Choji. It was a nice sight. The warm feeling in my chest spread and I left the room. Shikamaru was sitting at the table. He seemed relived when he saw it was me. It made me smile. He must have been worrying.
"Are they working it out?"
But I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him. He seemed surprised but put an arm around me anyway. "I love you."
"Where is that coming from?"
I looked up at him with a smile and heat in my cheeks. "If something... similar to Al... happened to me... would you still... love me?"
He was startled but his face melted into a smile with soft eyes. I love his eyes. "I will love you no matter what may happen to you."
I never knew that that statement would be tested in only a few days.