I couldn't believe what I had just done, and I couldn't believe Kendall just turned me the hell away. I walked down to the main hall to grab a drink. Normally I'd invite Dwight and Simon but they're the ones who pushed me to this stupid fucking situation to begin with.
I needed to clear the holy hell out of my mind. I sent away the wife, Kendall walking in was a real boner killer. But I mean come on was it really that big of a fucking deal? I mean it's not like Kendall and I are dating or married. So why do I feel so damn guilty about it. She knew the terms and conditions going into this mess, so why the fuck should this shit even matter. I enter the bar and unfortunately for me Dwight and Simon are already seated.
"You make up with Kendall?" Dwight asks.
"That's mighty fucking bold of you to ask. And no, I didn't. In fact I just got back from fucking one of my wives. I'll leave you guessing as to which one." I smirk at Dwight with one of those 'I'm-an-asshole-and-I fucking-know-it' kind of smiles. I lie through my teeth like a jackass to cover up what really had happened. Dwight gives me an irritated look as he pours back his drink.
"Yeah? How was it?" Simon pushes.
"Good. Even better when Kendall walked in." I snort
"Oh threesome?" Simon smiles.
"No. Just a good smack in the face to her. Remind her of her damn place. You know you've got to do that with woman sometimes. Give them a bit of a wake up call as to who they're dealing with. She'll be my wife in no time after that."
"You know... that's a serious dick move." Dwight mutters.
"What was that?" I ask irritated he would say such a fucking thing to me.
"I just... I mean this with all due respect, she didn't do anything to you. She's been nothing but good for you and you're pushing her away and one day Negan you're going to push her too far."
I scoff at the thought of her ever leaving anywhere, "Dwight there's a reason you're not seated at the endless pussy buffet. I have her eating out of the palm of my damn hand. Can you believe this shit Simon?" I say turning to my second hand man.
"Actually... I've gotta side with Dwight on this one boss. With all due respect. Kendall's a catch man. She's young, hardworking, determined. She's got a hot body and a cute face. Not to mention she's willing to put out for you anytime anywhere, or so you've told me... What more could you ask for these days?"
"You know what. Fuck both of you." I say chugging the rest of my drink. I head back to my room to take a cold shower. I mean getting blue-balled twice due to Kendall was not how I planned my day to go. I turn on the water and step in, had I really done something so bad? What other fucking plans could she possibly have for tonight besides laying awake in her room or reading a book. It's not like she has friends or anything.
I turn off the water and reach for a towel wrapping it around my body. After getting dressed I decide to go search for her, find out what kind of plans she could possibly have for tonight. I'm about to head out when I hear a faint knock on my door.
"I knew she'd come crawling back." I mumble to myself smirking, I open the door but to my surprise it's my wife Sherry and Tanya.
"Tag teaming tonight Ladies?" I ask. I'm not really in the mood after the shit day I had but I can't have my wives being suspicious that I would rather it be Kendall.
"No... it's Kendall." Sherry says shifting uncomfortably.
"What about her?" I mentally groan, were these ladies jealous I was spending time with her too? Or were they here to lecture me after finding out what happened.
"Tanya saw her and Mason go into her room." Sherry says
A ping of jealously pulses through my veins, it felt like someone just kneed me in the nutsack. That fucking guy?
"She didn't seem very competent. We heard her say to him she was unsure about what they were doing and he didn't stop. I think he may have done something to her, we found these when we walked past her room." Tanya explains holding up a tiny plastic baggy of small pills.
"What the fuck is that?"
"I think they may be some kind of drugs... now I'm not sure but I think he may have slipped them in her drink or something. She looked drunk but I don't know, can you please check on her?" Sherry pleads.
"He's been... hanging around the wives room again. And I think he may be seeing Frankie again but please don't hurt Frankie. And please don't tell her I said anything." Tanya says on the verge of tears.
"Fine, lets go see what all this fucking shit is about." I groan grabbing Lucille angrily and slamming my door behind them. I can not believe this guy has the balls to go after Kendall. This guy must have a death wish or something. He manages to get on every single one of my motherfucking nerves. I made him end things with my wife so he got to the second closest thing, Kendall. He's using her and she doesn't even know. But tonight he was going to learn.
When I approach Kendall's room her door is wide open, I look in and see him on top of her and he is hungrily kissing her. A whole new wave of angry crashes into me. Is this how Kendall felt finding me with my wife? Because this is an awful fucking feeling. I look over to her, these ladies were right... something is wrong with her. She can barely keep her eyes open.
"Listen, I'm doing this whether you're awake or not." Mason tugs at her skirt.
"Is that so?" I ask as calmly as I fucking can, but it is taking everything in me not to bash this guys brains all over the sides of her walls. They both look at me like deer in fucking headlights. Kendall looks at me as if she isn't sure if I'm really here or not but Mason practically jumps five feet in the air. His demeanor changes rapidly.
"Care to explain what's going on here?" I ask in the same dark calm tone as before.
"Well boss... I'm trying to have a good time. You of all people should know about those." Mason says as I scoff correcting him on the definition of a 'good time'
Kendall mumbles something ridiculous about her wanting this. As if she fucking knows what she wants, I know what's best for her. Why the fuck can't she see that? Look what kind of mess she got herself into now... one I've got to clean up.
Next thing I know Simon is carrying an unconscious Mason down to the main hall. Sherry and Tanya are giving Kendall coffee and water hoping to sober her up. Man am I going to have fun burning the holy hell out of the side of his face tonight. I should kick the fuck out of Kendall's ass too for putting herself in such a stupid dangerous position.
"Now if you will please excuse us ladies, Kendall and I have to have a little chat. Go down to the main hall, make sure everyone is awake and gathered, shows going to begin shortly." I order as they walk out of the room flashing sympathetic looks to Kendall. Good, she's gonna need them.
I stare at her as she stares at me back. Neither of us move, blink, hell I'm not sure if any of us are even breathing right now. We both are trying to stay calm, she's trying so hard not to crack under the pressure. I can tell, the guilt is eating her alive. She's basically squirming in my grasp, she knows what she got herself into and she sure as shit knows I wasn't happy about it. But I can't really punish her for it, because I did the same thing. Well, except hers somehow managed to turn into a bigger shit show. It still feels like she cheated on me, even if we we are 'no strings attached' She's still practically my wife whether she likes it or not. She should play by the fucking rules like all the other ladies are expected to.
Her eyes begin to brim with tears as she desperately tries to fight it. It takes everything in me not to comfort her. She did this to herself, she needs to put on her big girl panties and own up to it.
"I fucked up." She mutters. I have to stop the smirk from forming on my face, the three words I wanted to hear. She's embarrassed to admit it, I can tell, but she knows there was no other way around it.
"Yeah, you sure as shit did. But I guess I did too." I say sitting next to her on the bed. Seeing her drugged up and guilty really tugs at my heartstrings. I still can't show I forgive her, not without taking one more dig at her first. "So what was the plan? Sleep with a bunch of men to hurt me and hope you don't catch a fucking disease from it?"
I did not expect her to start yelling at me. That was the last thing I thought would happen, I'm zoned out of what she is saying until she says something that pulls me right back in to the conversation.
"I just, I really like you, okay? And I don't mean as your worker, or friend, or this whole 'no strings attached' thing. And I know I shouldn't, but I do. And sometimes I wish I didn't, but I do."
Shit I really wish I was listening to the first half of this conversation. Fuck, she couldn't seriously really have strong feelings for me could she? I mean me talking about being with her, running this place with her, it was just fantasy talk. I thought we were just joking around, but she's been taking that to heart? This has gone on too far. I need to distance myself far, far away from her. The last thing I need is her falling in love with me...
But, what if I felt like I liked her too? What if we just said 'fuck it' to this compound and left. Start over somewhere new... just her and I. I could get a do-over.
Holy. Fucking. Shitballs. I really have lost my fucking edge. This is bad. But then I remember, she's drunk out of her mind and on drugs...
"Kendall, you're drunk and are on some type of drug... you, you don't know what you're saying." Is all I can manage to come up with. She then goes on another rant accusing me of having a split personality. She's really pouring her entire fucking heart on the floor tonight and I sure as shit wasn't ready for any of it.
"I don't understand why you can't just tell me what you want Negan! Why won't you tell me what you want!" She desperately cries out.
Well how the fuck can I tell her what I want when I sure as shit don't even know what the fuck I want. I know I want her, but something is stopping me. My ego? My reputation? My fears that I'll just screw it up like I did with Lucille before the world went to shit?
"Because what I want is what I can't have." I mutter.
"What do you mean?"
Why does she always want answers I can not fucking provide for her! I need to switch this on her, I need to know where she stands with me.
"Who are you Kendall?"
She pauses for a moment looking into my eyes as if she wants me to feed her the fucking answer.
"I'm Negan." She says just above a whisper.
I don't know what to say. I can tell she is fighting to stay awake. I don't know what it is about this girl, but there is nothing more she hates than sleeping. Well unless it's in my bed, but to be fair even when we are in my bed we don't do much sleeping. I begin to smooth her hair with my hands hoping to coax her to sleep. The guilt is still eating away at her as she struggles to not only fight back sleep, but tears. I beg for her to fall sleep so I can go burn that fuckers face and call it a night. I need a way to release this pent up anger and that fucker was surely going to be the one to receive the shit end of the stick.
After she finally falls asleep I walk down to the main hall. Everyone is gathered standing around exhausted.
"Let's make this quick so we can all go the fuck to sleep." I announce.
"We can work this out Negan. I'll work the fence. I'll leave the community."
"No, enough with the begging and bargaining. Now don't be a pussy and take this punishment like a man for once."
"She said she wasn't your wife!"
"So that gives you the right to drug her? Or how about Frankie? Don't think I don't fucking know..."
"Negan I'm-"
"Enough. Dwight, the iron."
Mason starts screaming like a little bitch as everyone watches in discomfort. I take the piping hot iron and stick it right to the side of his face. Normally I'd show some mercy and stop after a few seconds but with him? I press even harder as he screams out. I go damn near to the bone until he ends up pissing himself and passes out, a common thing people in this position do.
"Let him be a fucking example to what happens around here when we don't follow the fucking rules." I snarl as a doctor rushes over, I crouch right in front of him "catch you anywhere near any of my wives or associates and I'll kill you. But that burn is so fucking gross, I feel like all these problems have been solved" I give him a small tap against the burn. He screams as I smirk feeling as though I've made my point.
After feeling satisfied from scarring Mason for the rest of his life, I walk back upstairs to my room. I stop by Kendall's room and notice her door is wide open. I am just about to shut it when I notice her bed is empty and she is nowhere in sight.
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Sorry for such a long chapter but I really wanted to get things from Negan's perspective! Thanks for reading so far!