I walked through the quiet school halls. It was at least an hour after school closed, no one was supposed to be here anymore but Casey insisted to meet now instead of earlier. I mean, I guess I shouldn't complain. She is doing me a favor by meeting in secret, after all.
I went up to one of the janitors. She was an old otter who gave off a strong scent of flowers, just as Casey described. It's the first time I'm talking to someone like her. My dad would freak out if he knew. Honestly, that's probably the only time it seems he notices me since his girlfriend always keeps him busy. God, Vanessa deserves an award for being such an attention-seeking whore.
The janitor looked up and gave me a confused look. "What are you doing here, dear? The school closed down a long time ago."
I wasn't in the mood to talk much.
"You have the keys to the library, don't you? I need them. I'm meeting up with Casey and-"
"Oh, Casey!? That sweet little girl?" Her face seemed to light up when she heard her name. "Why didn't you say so before! Just follow me, I'll walk you there."
As we were walking, she decided to strike up a conversation with me.
Just my luck...
"It's so nice to finally see someone that's a friend of Casey's. She's such a doll! I don't understand why you kids are always so mean to her."
"Oh no, we're not friends. We have to do a project together. That's all I'm here for."
She chucked. "Not yet you're not. Trust me, Casey'll win you over before you even realize!"
...We'll see about that...
I know I think she's a nice person but I doubt we could ever be friends. I'm just here for this stupid project. Once that's over, it's all back to normal.
"Here we are. Just go on in and wait for her. She's probably working late again."
The janitor opened the door for me and shut it once I went inside. I turned the lights on.
The library's a grand place, I must admit. It's spacious and cozy. But it reminds me of home a little. I have a library back at my place, my mom adored books. It holds a lot of memories of back when things were perfect. In fact, I used to go there every day and cry during the first few months or so after my mom left. Dad never got rid of it either, I know a part of him was still attached to her. Maybe still is.
I don't like going there, anymore. It hurts too much.
I saw something lumpy in one of the isles. Actually, it seemed like one of those sleeping bags you'd bring when you'd go camping. Either way, it was odd seeing it there.
There was also a book on the ground. I sat down and opened it. Turns out it was a journal...
Casey's journal...
I don't wanna invade in her privacy, I'm not like Mike. But I was also a bit curious...After all, she said earlier she would write down her thoughts. I was kinda curious what she actually thought of us. We're all really mean to her so there's gotta be a lot of rants here...
Still, I shouldn't.
Just as I was about to close the book, I heard footsteps and panting.
"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry I'm late. There was just a long line tonight and there was only one other employee and then someone spilled their drink on someone else and they started to fight and-"
"Okay okay, calm down! I didn't ask for your damn life story."
"Sorry, it's just been a hectic night." her eyes trailed down to the book in my paws. "...Is that my diary?"
I could feel the blood rushing to my face in embarrassment. "I-I wasn't reading it! I just saw it on the ground and opened it to see what it was! I swear I didn't actually read anything!"
"It's fine. Even if you did, I doubt it'd matter. I mean, everyone hates me either way so it's not like anything would change if you told anyone what's in it."
...Well, at least she doesn't sugarcoat things?..
"Oh, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I'm just really tired I guess."
She did look tired, a bit lifeless, too. Her eyes seemed a bit dull honestly, like they just lost their spark. I'm not used to seeing her like this. She feels so different..
"It's no problem. It sounds like you had a bad day."
Then as if nothing happened, she smiled and lit up again, gleefully sitting next to me. I don't think I've seen such a quick turn around before.
"Oh don't worry about it, it wasn't that bad. So anyway, still no ideas for the project?"
"No, sorry. I'm not that good at this."
"Oh, it's no problem! I haven't been able to think of anything either. Maybe we should just read the syllabus for now, just to get started."
We read the syllabus for a while, or well she was reading it. I tried to but I was having a hard time focusing. I just...I can't get my mind off of what happened. Even now, she still seems slightly off.
One thing I noticed about Casey was that her smile was always genuine. When she'd look at you and give you a smile, it never felt like it had any malicious intent or any hidden meanings. It was just a nice, sweet gesture.
But right now, it just feels a bit fake. It feels like she's forcing herself to do this.
"Jack?"
I didn't realize how long I was staring.
"Oh um sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel weird or anything. I just kinda spaced out."
"You seem off, is everything okay?"
"That's what I wanted to ask you."
She looked at me for a bit, then looked down at the syllabus.
"I'm just having a rough day."
I wasn't really sure whether to pry or leave it at that. I didn't want to force her but I didn't want her to feel like she has to hide anything either.
I mean technically she does, it would be better for me if she does. But still, I just can't see her this down and not say something.
"Well, what happened?"
"Why do you wanna know? Don't I bore you when I talk? I don't want to bother you if I do."
"..No don't worry. You're not bothering me."
She let out a long sigh.
"Alright then. Well, I work at a fast food joint near by, a part time job. It's normally calm but today two customers were fighting and complaining and just caused so much chaos inside. Only one of my colleagues showed up today, too, so we both had to take care of them and the rest of the customers at the same time."
"That much?.. I didn't really think your jobs were that hard. I mean, I guess I just never gave it much thought."
"Yeah, I figured you'd react that way. But anyway, since I had to multitask a lot today, I didn't end up getting to think about the project at all. Thirty chapters in three months...that's ten chapters a month, it's so much..."
She rubbed her temples and let out a tired laugh.
"I love our teacher but she might've gotten a bit carried away with this one. It's such a big part of our grade, too. How am I supposed to do this.."
"Well um...ten chapters a month hm? Could we split it? Like you can do five chapters and I can do five chapters each month."
"But then the issue is with our writing styles. I remember when you read out your work in class before, we both have different styles for writing. It would ruin the book's flow if we split it like that."
She has a point. The flow is 20% of our grade for this. If we do poorly on it, it would heavily affect it.
Normally I wouldn't really care but Casey...She seems to want to get a good grade on this. Knowing her she's probably aiming for at least a high 90s. She seems so stressed about this.
What do I say?
"Jack I...I'm sorry I don't think today's a good day for this. I'm really sorry I'm just too tired to think of anything."
"It's fine, I mean it's not like I was any better than you and I don't even have an excuse for it."
She kept staring at the ground.
"So...I guess we'll meet again here tomorrow?"
"Not tomorrow, I have a tutoring gig."
"Tutoring?"
"Mhm, it's just something I do every now and then for some extra pay. And I have work on Friday again.. Let's just meet Saturday instead, meet me outside the main gate. I'll get the keys from my aunt so we can get in."
"Alright."
We got out our phones and exchanged numbers. I recognized Casey's phone, it was an older model of a cheaper brand, but it's really good quality. I used to have that exact same one when I was 11 I think. It was the first phone I got.
She walked me to the library's entrance.
"Well, see you in class tomorrow." She smiled.
"Yeah.."
I still felt a bit bad. I want to cheer her up but I don't know how to. Well, I knew one way but I don't know if it's the right way.
Well...no one's watching...so...
I stepped closer and gave her a hug. Not a long one, just a short quick hug and stepped back again.
Can't really tell if that was the right move, she seems a bit shocked and I'm still feeling ridiculous.
"I..what...why?.."
"..Did I do something wrong?.."
"N-no it's not that. I'm just...confused? I mean, this doesn't really happen often or at all really."
...
"Look, don't take it the wrong way. I just thought you needed it."
I just thought it would help.
She was looking down again. I was worried I did something wrong but she started to smile. This time, it felt like her usual smile. Small, soft, and just warm.
"Thank you. For everything tonight."
Stop looking at me like that...
"Um well yeah, bye."
I rushed out the door. Sure it was a bit rude to do that but what else was I supposed to do? I just...I was feeling weird again...
***
I laid on my bed. I'm trying to sleep, I really am. But I just can't.
So many thoughts...
How am I supposed to last three months with her? I acted so weirdly tonight. I can't explain it but she just makes me feel so attached to her. I couldn't help myself from at least trying to make her smile again tonight.
I mean I guess I was successful. But then that's the issue. Whenever she does smile, it makes me want to stare at her forever.
I even have to be careful with how friendly I am towards her, what if she tries to hang out with me in school. I can't say no to her and that's exactly why I avoided her in the first place.
Tonight wasn't perfect but it just makes me feel a certain way.
Like how I used to feel when mom and dad were still together. When we'd spend our time together, even if it wasn't very often.
Why did they have to split? All the books mom would read, the ones about love. They made it out to be something so powerful and amazing. It was this feeling that would keep two mammals together no matter what.
...Mom's books.
I remembered one. I think it was one of the last ones I read from mom's library, right before she left. It was written in a really unique way...
I think maybe there is a way to do this project.
I took out my phone and opened Casey's contact.
Author: Hey hey hey, tis been a while :D I know I said I'd leave this account, but tbh that was my fault for being stupid, of course I'd get nostalgic and come back. I was rereading a lot fo my old books and unintentionally ended up leaving myself on numerous criminal cliffhangers since I somehow always stopped writing at the most interesting parts. I was rereading this one a while back and, I guess I just felt the urge to continue it. I really adore the idea even now, and it was the only one I remembered the direction it was heading so I figured why not.
I might post two chapters of it at once today cuz I wrote this one a while back and just finished the next one today. It really depends on how patient I am, I might post Chapter Four today or a while later, who knows? maybe I might start actually getting fucking organized and post it after I finish Chapter Five so I'm always a chapter ahead.
They'll be coming out randomly tho, I'll probably leave for months again only to return from the darkness but do remember this is just for fun and I've got way too much on my plate to prioritize it enough to be consistent with the schedule ;v; my apologies TvT But I'll still be writing it out more.
As for my other stories, I most likely won't be touching them. If I have any other one-shot ideas, I'll work on those and I will still try to do another chapter for DRACULA sometime in the future. But any of my other stories, including my original Zootopia fanfic, I won't be touching. The characters in that story are much MUCH more different than they are in my head now. Maybe one day I'll rewrite it and reboot it with the newer versions of the plot, relationships, and characters but only time will tell :3
If anyone is still reading this, hello and thank you for sticking around ^^ Or welcome if you just found me, don't read anything else if you're not prepared for very bad amateur works of a tiny 12 year old (and if you read the MESSAGES series especially, remember that nearly five years has passed from then to now so a lot of the things I wrote are not how I feel today, I was just being a dumb kid on the internet ;v;)
But yeah, that's all for now folks. Author out! *dabs holy shit I missed doing this more than I should*