Venom That Does Not Grip/ Pride That Will Not Show:
I could be mad, I could feel cheated and and scolded
I could react like a child or I could let go of it
I could feel unjust treatment in the unkindness of another
Or I could let my mind slip open and wander
Into calmed waters that do not resemble that kind of sea
Golden boy lying in an ocean that did not fucking belong to me
In the slightest, I let my ideas get the best of me
My emotions wandered just too far out of reach
Towards someone claiming to be things I couldn't see
Things I would never want to be.
I could call it cowardice, I could fight and scream
I could let venomous anger heat to the point it stings
But I do not have the time and I wish you the best
Purely only out of the kindness and humble respect of my own self defence.
Because holding on to hating this would only burn me
And it isn't worth chipping away at my skin for someone damaged who doesn't see
I hope you find a way some day to be whole. And it won't have anything to do with me.
This has been a quick venom that has not gripped
And pride that has reared its ugly head only to not be seen.
I want nothing to do with this past but to grow
Embarrassed and uncomfortable by emotions that shouldn't have shown
I want only peace and self respect from the deepest part of the path
That leads people away from things that bring back too many scars.
I could hate you but I think indifference fits best
Because it was never anything, nothing to forget
Out of sight out of mind, life goes on this time
Healing takes its time, but this one will not last in pain
For the venom has not gripped, your pride in vein
I am still whole, I breathe towards the storm
Aware that the calm, is in the eye of the beholder,
So drown ocean boy, sink or swim I simply do not mind
Your life is nothing of my own thinking, nor is your own demise
May you find a way to be whole without crushing those around you against the shore.
I look back to a calmer water,
One that has known me before.
~J.K.M.