Heyyy!! Here's another update! Enjoy xx
*Dakota's POV*
I wake with the urge to throw up. Only just making it to the bathroom in time to throw my head over the toilet and bring up any food I had in my stomach. I slump to the floor, dressed in one of Jamie's tops and black lace pants. I soon hear him, he's in the en-suite with me and he's stroking my hair from my face.
"It's okay.. it's okay, I've got you" he murmurs sleepily and I smile weakly, resting my head against him. He gives me some water and I take a welcomed sip before putting it down. "Come on baby" he lifts me into his arms and I curl up when he places me on the bed. He gets back in and covers us up, stroking my hair from my face again.
"Thank you" I whisper, closing my eyes. He kisses my cheek and I smile a bit. "Sleep baby, we don't have to go out until later" he whispers against my forehead.
It's been a week since being told the baby's heartbeat wasn't as it should be. Today we find out whether they're okay. It's been a week since me and Jamie slept together again, he's been staying in my bed since. I sleep better with him next to me.
I wake from nodding off, Jamie's laid next to me gazing at me. "I could watch you sleep forever.. but we should think about getting up and ready for your appointment " he smiles slightly, leaning over to kiss the corner of my mouth.
"Okay.." I smile slightly. "I'm going to have a shower" i sit up slowly and Jamie gets up. I shower and then he does too, I change into black jeans and a grey top.
We head downstairs and Jamie prepares breakfast for us. Toast with eggs and bacon. We sit and eat but I just pick at mine. "Are you not eating?" He asks, gazing at me as he finishes his breakfast.
"I can't.. I'm too scared about today.." I whisper and he takes my hand. "Okay.. but promise to eat after?" He raises an eyebrow and I nod, smiling slightly. "I will I promise" i kiss his cheek and he smiles, taking our plates away.
---
"How're you both doing?" Kelly smiles warmly at us as we sit down. "Nervous about today" I smile a bit and she nods. "Of course.. you look well though, and I can notice you've gotten bigger, that's a good sign" she smiles and I let out the breath I had been holding in.
"Yeah my mom said that.." I smile a bit. She types some information into the computer and then instructs me to get comfy on the bed. I do as she says and lift my top as Jamie grips hold of my spare hand, squeezing it gently before kissing it.
She squirts some gel onto my stomach and grabs the probe, gently moving it around to get a proper look. I'm holding my breath. Jamie's tense beside me. Second later there's a heartbeat. I watch the screen and Kelly as she grins widely, pausing the ultrasound so we can see our baby. It's bigger than last week.
"All is good!" She grins to me. Jamie relaxes beside me. "Really?" I Well up, covering my face with both hands, crying softly. "The heartbeat is perfect" she gently rubs my arm to comfort me. I take a few seconds to compose myself, Jamie kissing my head repeatedly.
"Thank you.." I smile shyly, drying my eyes as I look to Kelly. "I'll get you a few scan photos printed" she smiles and cleans my stomach, helping me sit up before wandering to the next room. "Thank god" I whisper, looking to Jamie. He grins and wipes his eyes before using his thumbs to wipe my cheeks, gently placing a kiss on my lips.
"I told you they'd be fine.." he whispers, resting his forehead against mine. I pull him to me and wrap my arms around his waist as I hug him. "Thank you for being here with me.. thank you for not leaving." I whisper and I smile when I feel him kiss my head.
Kelly comes back in and we pull away, going back over to the table. She hands me the photos and I smile shyly, thanking her. She presses a few buttons on the computer and then something prints off.
"I won't need to see you now until you're twenty six weeks, unless you wanted a gender scan, we can book that?" She smiles at me and I pout. "No I think we'll pass.. I want it to be a surprise" I smile shyly looking at Jamie who nods, gently squeezing my hand.
We say our goodbye and together we head back to the car. "Can we go see my mom?" I smile a bit as he pulls out of the car park. "Of course.." he smiles a bit. "I bet.. She hates me doesn't she?" He frowns a bit, glancing at me. "She did want to beat your ass into gear when you left, and she was gonna beat your ass when I told her I was pregnant.." I giggle as his face drops "but she wouldn't hate you.. as long as I'm happy" I smile and take his hand, squeezing it gently.
"And are you?" He glances at me whilst he drives. "Happy?" I turn my gaze to him, he nods. "I feel like, with you, I need to take each day as it comes.." I start, pausing to see his reaction, but it gives nothing away. "and today.. right now, I am.. very happy" I smile shyly and he relaxes.
"Me too.." he says quietly, turning his gaze to me as we pull up outside my moms. "Doesn't mean you're fully forgiven" I shake my finger at him and he chuckles, holding his hands up. "I never said I assumed that" he laughs, and I link my arm with his, walking into my moms.
"Hey Mama" I smile, throwing my arms around my moms neck. She hugs me and kisses my cheek. "You okay honey? You're glowing" she says pulling away to look at me at arms length. "I'm doing really good... except for the morning sickness" I roll my eyes, grabbing myself some water and taking a seat at the breakfast bar.
"Is it bad?" She wrinkles her nose at me and I nod, pouting. "You don't have to stand there silly, make yourself at home" she says to Jamie, shooing him from the doorway. He laughs a bit and sits next to me, taking my hand under the table.
"Was you sick much with me?" I ask and she nods, her eyes wide. "Nearly everyday! Maybe you're having a girl" she winks and I grin, resting my hand on my tiny bump. "I think we want to keep it a surprise" I smile at her before looking at Jamie. He grins and kisses my cheek.
"How're the kids Jamie?" She asks him and I smile slightly. "They're good, Dulcie just started kindergarten, she's growing up too fast.. Elva is a cheeky little monkey" he smiles, his face lighting up slightly when he speaks about them. "How often do you see them?" She asks
"Once a month for now.." he smiles sadly and my heart breaks for him. But his two girls adore him so much, they'll understand. "That's not very fair.." my mom frowns "I know, but I can't push her.. I'm waiting for the divorce and the courts to get involved.." he nods a bit and I squeeze his hand.
"Can we have dinner here? I'm starving" I giggle, trying to change the subject. "Of course, what did you both want?" My mom asks and I look to Jamie. "I don't mind, you choose.. what does baby want?" He smiles at me and I giggle shyly. "I think they want...." I stop and think, pouting. "Some chicken pasta" i grin and my mom giggles, she knows it's my favourite thing that she cooks.
"I'll do some for dinner" she smiles, starting all the prep as we sit and watch her "do you want some help?" I offer but she declines, shaking her head and smiling at me. "You've never had my moms special chicken pasta have you?" I ask Jamie to which he shakes his head.
"You're in for a treat!" I grin, kissing his cheek as we hold hands on the breakfast bar. He smiles his shy smile at me and I realise it's my favourite thing to see in the world. I lean to kiss him gently and it takes him by surprise. I just cant help myself.
When we pull away my mom is smiling at us, but she quickly glances away when I turn to her, blushing. God I feel like a teenager! What's wrong with me. I giggle to myself. "So have you decided how you're decorating the baby nursery?" My mom asks, trying to engage us into conversation.
----
It's later that night, Jamie's just showering in my en-suite bathroom. I'm laying in bed in my silk night dress with black lace pants on. I'm a bit hot so I don't have the covers on me yet. I'm just looking at what's on the television when Jamie enters the bedroom, wrapped in just a towel. My mouth drops open as I gawk at him.
He smirks as he sits on the edge of the bed. "Enjoying the view?" He smirks and I chuckle, nodding. "Most definitely" I grin cheekily and he laughs, drying himself a bit and sliding some boxers on. "Am I okay to sleep in here again?" He smiles and I nod, getting under the covers.
"I sleep better with you here.." I smile shyly and he gets into bed beside me, laying on his side and stroking my hair from my face. We lay quietly, just looking at each other for the longest time. "You're so beautiful" he whispers gazing at my face.
I smile shyly. "Jamie.. we need to talk" I say, taking his hand. He frowns a bit, turning himself to me more. "I just think we need to clarify what we are.." I smile a bit, locking our fingers together. "I want you.. any way I can have you.. our baby too. I don't want to be without you ever again" he says, looking to our hands then looking back to me.
"I want that too.. I really do.. but I'm scared I'll get hurt" I whisper and he frowns, leaning on his elbow and looking down at me. "What I did before was so so stupid of me to do, I don't ever want to feel like that ever again. I hated myself so much for leaving you, I still do now.. I shouldn't have ever thought going back to her was best for the girls.. it wasn't" he stops, taking a deep breath. My eyes are wide and brimming with tears.
"All me and her did was argue. She was so damn controlling, we didn't love each other. She just used the girls as an excuse to keep me there so she could spend my money. But let me tell you... not a day or night went by where you wasn't on my mind. I thought about you so much all the time. I wish I'd never walked out on you." He whispers, releasing my hand so he can stroke my cheek as tears fall.
"You hurt me so bad" I whisper, crying softly as I watch his expression drop. I cover my eyes as I cry but he takes my hand, kissing it gently before resting it beside me. "Don't hide from me, you need to let me see how much I hurt you. Though it kills me.." he frowns a bit. I reach up and rest my hand on his cheek.
"You broke my heart.... when we were together you brought sunshine into my life, you made me happier than I'd ever felt before, but you walked out that day and you took all of that with you." I cry a bit more, chewing my lip to try and stop my tears.
"I know that nothing I ever say will make you forgive me.. I was a jerk, and I understand if you never want to let me that close again" he says but I rest my finger over his lips to shush him. "I tried so hard to hate you for what you did to me... But I found out I was pregnant with your baby.. and I realised I couldn't ever hate you.. I just loved you more, because we've created a beautiful thing together" I wipe my eyes with my hand.
"My mom told me I needed to speak to you but I was scared, because I knew all of those feelings would come back again.. and you walked into my house that night I told you I was pregnant and they did. They all came back" I whisper and he smiles his shy smile which has become my new favourite thing.
"I was like a teenager.. butterflies and everything" I giggle a bit and he kisses my lips gently. "I love you so much.. I mean that. I was so stupid to let you go" he whispers, his head against mine. "You was stupid to let me go.." I smirk and he gasps, laughing. "But I think I forgive you.. maybe not fully yet.. but I'm glad you're here with me, and I love that you stayed with me after everything with the possible miscarriage.." I smile shyly, resting my hand on my stomach.
"I told you they'd be okay" he grins, kissing me gently, resting his hand over mine. "I'm glad they're okay.. and I'm glad you're here with me" I grin, curling myself up to him as he lays back down. "I'm not going anywhere, ever again.. I hope that we can be okay properly again soon." He kisses my head.
"We will.. I promise.. we have at least six months until the baby is here.. it's plenty of time for us to get back on track" I smile shyly, kissing his chest. "I hope that I can introduce you to the girls as my girlfriend" he whispers and I lift my head, my face splitting into a massive grin. "I'd love that.." I kiss him gently. "Me too.. you can bond with them.. they're going to love you.." he kisses my hair repeatedly as I close my eyes, smiling shyly. "I love you" I mumble as I fall asleep.
Just a short one, sorry!! Comments are appreciated as always x