"Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion.
That is just being in love, which any fool can do.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.
Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground.
And, when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two."
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Livius' POV:
She was hurting.
Again.
I could so clearly feel her pain as though it were my own. As though I too experienced what she'd been through at the hands of my father.
Although this time I'm well aware that it has less to do with me, and more to do with the family she lost twelve years ago, the mere fact that she wasn't in my arms right now was enough to make my blood boil.
She was supposed to be here. With me. By my side. In the safety of my arms.
I truly was an idiot.
She was my mate. The woman meant to rule beside me for all eternity. The center of my world. The greatest gift the goddess could ever give me.
She was my moon, so how could I hurt like this?
How could I disregard her feelings?
How could I put someone else in her place?
After everything she'd said to me. After everything we've spoken of. To think that I would be the one to turn my back on her.
How could I be such a fool?
How could I go on and on talking about how much I adored her, and then do this?
What were all those words for?
What were all those gifts for? All those saccharine nicknames?
Were they mere false promises of the love I could give her? Was it all a lie?
I wasn't lying when I told her she was my world. So why wasn't I backing my words? Why was I allowing a mere friend of mine to disrespect her?
Victoria and I have come a long way, but when did our friendship begin to blind me of the beauty of my relationship with my own mate? When did it begin to stand in the way of my love for another?
If this kept going, there was no doubt that I would soon lose Alexandria.
Which is why it had to end.
It's high time I closed up this shitty chapter.
Sighing, I refocused on the woman in front of me. It was somewhere near midnight, Alexandria was off in the woods with Damien, and instead of consoling her on such a trying day I was standing across from one of my oldest friends.
Taking a casual sip of the glass of red wine in her hand, Victoria's gaze met my own, her eyes narrowing on my form as I leaned against the wall.
"Judging by that look," she began, slowly standing up and moving closer to me. "I think it's safe to assume that you're here to talk."
I glowered down at her. "What else would I be here for?"
She tugged at the edge of her winter sweater, the action enough to prove what she had in mind. "I don't know," she murmured in that sweet, seductive tone of hers.
"When did you become so ignorant?" I bit out, noting the small crack in her facade when she flinched at my words. But she was quick to rebuild it, although she was well aware that I already knew what was on the other side of that fake wall of emotion she always put up for others.
"We both know that whatever we had ended years ago. We both agreed to end it. So what the fuck are you doing, Victoria?" I questioned, taking in her tall form. She was nowhere near as tiny as my Alexandria, nowhere near as gentle.
Alexandria would always remain superior when it came to fighting skills, but no one could deny that she had a softer, more sensitive side of her. A Luna side of her.
I knew Victoria did too, but every morning she chose to wear a hard mask that she assumed would protect her from everything that the outside world was. I knew her well enough to see past it though.
"I was meant to be your chosen."
My anger spiked at her words. "Did you I ever tell you that? The pack wanting you as their Luna doesn't make you the Luna, you know that. I was never going to mark you, but everyone saw you as the first candidate, so they simply assumed you'd be the next queen."
She cocked her head. "But you think Alexandria is more befitting of the title? The same girl who couldn't keep her anger in check just a few days ago?"
"You were taunting her," I snapped, recalling the incident nearly a week ago. This entire situation was stretching for an unnecessarily long time, and I was getting sick of it. "I haven't spoken to my mate in almost two weeks, Victoria. Enough of this shit."
She frowned. "Livius, I don't understand what you see in her. She's a Fae. Her father killed your mother. She's-"
I cut her off, my voice filling the dimly lit area. "I don't need you to tell me of her father's sins. She had nothing to do with any of it, and you know it. Since when have you been so hateful?"
"Since you accepted a Faerie whore as your mate."
I growled at her words, not missing the way she flinched again, her own body betraying her. "The next time you speak of my mate in such a manner," I bit out, whilst taking a threatening step in her direction.
"You lose your tongue."
Her frown deepened. "I just don't get it! How could you forget, Livius? How could you look past it?"
"I didn't see her as her father. I spoke and listened to her. I understood her. And so did my advisors. But you never gave her a chance, Victoria, that's why you'd never know."
"How is she any different from any other she-wolf? You could've chosen someone more worthy of the title, so why? Why did you bother?" she questioned incredulously, those ocean eyes searching my own.
"The only way to get the answer to that is if you were to spend time with her," I shrugged. "But you've lost that chance, especially after what you've said."
Her gaze dropped to the ground, no longer able to hold my own. "She kicked me into a tree."
"You know it was well deserved."
"Luna's are usually weak."
"I told you, she's different."
She briefly met my gaze. "No one will ever accept her."
"I don't need their approval, just their respect," I answered.
"You know it's deeper than that, Livius. Her kind is our sworn enemy, no one's going to welcome her with open arms."
"I'll deal with it," I told her, my eyes narrowing again. "For now, I just need you to stop disrespecting her."
She snorted, the action earning her another snarl from me. "I mean it, Victoria. Enough is enough. I'm not defending you anymore. Whatever she does to you next time I will not condemn. You've seen her power. Stop testing her," I warned.
"She was going to kill me, and you're just okay with that?" she ground out, her hands balling up into fists.
"Put yourself in her position. Replay your own words as though they were being said to you," I said, my arms crossing over my chest. "You would've done the same. And so would I."
Her eyes fell to the ground again. An angry scowl now plastered on her face. "I didn't think she'd snap like that."
I gave another shrug. "Everyone knows of a Fae's temper."
"She should've had at least a little more control, she's half wolf."
"Oh, so now you're acknowledging that?"
She directed her scowl at me, those unbelievably familiar eyes locking with my own. "I'll never accept her, even if she's only half fae," she said instead. "I'll never accept any of her kind."
"I don't care," I rolled my eyes, a part of me shocked by how childish she was being. "Just leave her the fuck alone."
"And if I don't?"
I turned away from her, my hand landing on her doorknob. "Then you can expect to be sent down to the Altair pack for a little while."
Victoria stiffened at that, her last semblance of control disappearing. "You'd go as far as to send me away for her?!" she suddenly raised her voice, clear shock and an untamed anger lacing her words.
I glanced back at her, my gaze hardening. "You are my friend, and closest ally Victoria. But I will not allow you to disrespect your own Queen."
"So you're just going to ship me off for speaking my mind?" she growled at me.
I sent her a warning glare, not liking her tone. "She's done nothing to earn your ire. You're the one adding coal to your own fire, and you know it. You're making yourself angry for no reason."
"I'm giving you a choice. Shut the fuck up, or get the fuck out of my pack. This is where I draw the line." I continued in response to her outburst.
She snarled again. "How could you choose her?"
I was beginning to grow tired of her disbelief. "Two weeks ago I told my mate she was being childish, but it seems I was wrong," I scoffed. "This isn't like you, Victoria. This isn't the girl everyone in the pack adores and respects. This isn't the girl I grew up with."
"So that's it then?" she asked, cocking her head to the side. "That's what you came here to say?"
"Since it's clearly not getting through your head, allow me to summarize," I sighed, finally sick of her questions.
"One more stunt, and you're out."
She blinked up at me for a few moments, unable to believe my words. "After everything we've been through, Livius? After all the shit we came out of together? Is this really how it's all going to end?"
I sighed, my hand coming up to tiredly pinch the bridge of my nose. "You should've known better than to threaten her, Victoria. She's your Queen. And what you said..." I trailed off, slowly shaking my head. "You never attack something someone has lost. You should know that."
She said nothing, her brows suddenly dipping in thought. "If this were anyone else, you would've sent them away."
"She's not just anyone," I answered simply, the words that I had yet to admit to myself bubbling to the surface.
Which makes me wonder, how deep did these feelings run, anyway? How much more potential did they have to set my heart ablaze? How much longer could I bear not telling my mate of their intensity?
She was everything I could've ever dreamed of in a partner. Perfection trapped and crystallized in that tiny body. A flaming personality simmering behind those warm brown eyes. A sharp tongue that would never hesitate to call me out. Swaying locks of hair that constantly reminded me of my mother, and everything she'd wanted me to become.
She may have called me her moon, but in fact I was a mere planet in the universe that she was to me. And I doubt, anything could ever change that.
True, there would be times of anger and hesitation like these. Times where we both doubted the potential of what we shared. Times where I was left to wonder how much she matters to me.
But the center most cardinal fact was that we'd always return to one another.
There was no one that could simply tear us apart. Nothing that could rip away what we had. Nothing that could break our bond, and leave us as shattered glass on the floor of our own souls.
She was the artist to my empty canvas.
The way she painted my soul with all the colors of her rainbow, and drenched my heart in her golden radiance was enough to make me want to remain by her side forever.
She was more than just my mate. She was her own independent being.
She was made half wolf, half fae. Half gentle satin, and half burning sword. Heavy on the mind, and light on the tongue. Even after years, one could still remember that delicate smile, and those golden eyes. Even after years, you could still speak of her as though you'd seen her just yesterday.
That was the true depth of her radiance.
A brilliance that not even a King could forget.
Although she is entirely unaware of it. Alexandria came in a strange time of my life. A time that anyone and everyone could relate to. When the days start blurring into each other, and you're simply consumed by work. When everything is just gray, and you're living an entirely mundane life.
I wouldn't say that I was bored, but rather I was so consumed by my work that I barely even had time to think. Right when I was free of dealing with my late father's multi-billion dollar company, I'd be overwhelmed with ruling the Kingdom. And once that became my everyday routine, the thought of having a mate never even crossed my mind anymore.
I'd looked for Alexandria for two years, and eventually had no choice but to stop searching. So, imagine my shock when I found her chilling out in the middle of a city I'd visited several times before.
And ever since that day our eyes met for the first time, things changed.
I had someone who would look me in the eye, and tell me that I was wrong. Someone that wouldn't pause while they were in my presence. Someone who I could hold in my arms without having to worry about what their true intentions were. Someone who erred and learned from it. Someone who was different from all I've ever known.
And I'll be damned if she was ever taken from me.
Never once did I imagine that there was someone out there who could make me turn away from even Victoria, alas the moon goddess has proven me wrong.
Refocusing on the woman across from me, I shot her one last fleeting look, before fully turning away, my back towards her as I spoke my final words.
"End this Victoria, or I'll end it for you."