I'm not going to that.
It's not my thing.
Have fun, Shinso.
These 3 thoughts replayed in your head over and over again. You had told yourself time and time again how you weren't going to that stupid party yet here you were staring at yourself in the mirror. You put on a little black dress that you paired with a nice pair of silver hoop earrings. You felt like you were dressed over the top for some stupid high school party. However, this had been the 5th time you had changed and it was either now or never. You reapplied your favorite lipstick and dumped it into your bag.
Your mom was taking another shift at the hospital and you figured it'd be nice to get out of your house. Plus, some of your other friends looked like they were also attending the party. The time on your phone read 10 PM. It was definitely time to go. You weren't planning on staying too late. With a spray of perfume and the click of your heels strapping in, your were on your way out the door.
The ride to Yaoyoruzo slowed as it approached the gates that were held open to visitors. A worker checked in with you to make sure you actually went to her school and weren't just some random kid who wanted to crash the party. With his approval, your driver slowly made his way to her front door. You felt your palms getting sweaty and your knees shaking with nervousness. There were already a few kids just lounging around on her steps and near her giant plants that were cut in wacky shapes.
"Is here alright, Miss?" your driver asked.
His voice snapped you back to reality. "Oh yes, this is fine."
With a shaky hand you opened your door. The overall crowd was very mixed. Some people were dressed down and kept things casual while others clearly came here to have a good party. You were just dressed pretty moderately in comparison. At least you weren't going to stick out like a sore thumb. You took a deep breath to mentally prepare yourself to walk through that house and find at least one of your friends.
You shakily managed to get up the stairs and ignore the rude stares given to you. You were barely through the front door and already felt like an unwanted guest. You and Yaoyoruzo weren't the bestest of friends but you weren't enemies either. The two of you just never really clicked and that was okay. The house no, the mansion had music blasting so loud it was already making your ears ring. You felt the bass in your chest and at the bottom of your feet. Your eyes quickly scanned the crowd as you moved from room to room to find a group of people to mingle with.
"Ha, you lose Denki!"
A familiar voice followed by loud laughing could be heard coming from the kitchen. You moved from the dining room to the back. Sitting on the counter table was one of your beloved friends, Jiro and it looked like Denki had just lost to her at beer pong. He gripped at his hairs, shocked that he had indeed lost. A smile spread across your lips.
"Jiro!" you called out.
Your friend squinted at you in confusion before throwing her hands in the air in happiness. "(Name)! You're here! I'm so glad you came!"
She jumped off the counter and ran to give you a big hug. The other group of kids who you did not know that well, went back to poking fun at Denki.
"I didn't know you were gonna be here," she said in awe. Clearly she already had a few. "I was gonna text you about it but figured you wouldn't be into it. My baaad."
"It's okay," you chuckled. "Is there anything left to drink or did you drink it all?"
"Hmmm there might just be one left for you," she grinned.
She grabbed you by the hand and guided you to the fridge where she pulled out a beer for you. One drink couldn't hurt.
"Thanks. So did I miss anything?"
You both hopped onto the nearest counter.
"Yaoyoruzo made a little appearance a few minutes ago thanking everyone for coming and yada yada." Jiro pretended to fake snore and fall asleep. "But then she disappeared upstairs somewhere."
"Oh that's cool," you nodded. "So I missed nothing."
"Pretty much."
The song suddenly switched to one with more tempo. Jiro got a spark in her eyes. She grabbed your hand and the two of you dashed to the dance floor. Other teens were gathered here and you looked around; noticing that Shinso wasn't anywhere in sight. Jiro went up to the DJ's booth and plugged her headphone jacks into his system. If the music was loud before, now it was blaring. It was so loud you couldn't even scream to Jiro to turn it down. Her eyes were just closed and she was waving her hands in the air as she danced. You began to weave your way through a group of people until a dark cloud caught your attention.
You turned towards the grand staircase. The staircase you and your mom will never get to have. There you saw Shinso with his hands stuffed in the pocket of his black hoodie. Next to him was Yaoyoruzo. She wore a long, low cut red dress that hugged her curves nicely. Her hair was let down from its usual ponytail too. Your eyes narrowed down at the way her hands tugged on the bottom of her dress, readjusting it and smoothing out wrinkles that had appeared.
The whole room seemed to spin. You and Shinso locked eyes but he pretended not to see you. Instead, he put his hand on Yaoyoruzo's lowerback and guided her down the steps to prevent her from falling. She nervously looked up at him and smiled; the corner of her mouth smudged with lipstick. She was clearly tipsy. That you could tell as she almost fell when she got off the final step but Shinso managed to catch her in time.
The music suddenly went back to its original loud volume which now felt like a relief to your ears. Jiro had been kicked out from the DJ's booth as other guests came complaining about a headahce. She stumbled next to you and wrapped her arms around your waist.
"Oh!" she hiccuped. "There's Shinso. Why don't you go say hiii?"
"It looks like he's with someone," you said just quiet enough for only her to hear.
Her eyes squinted down at Yaoyoruzo. "What? Her?" she slurred. "Who cares? Just go say hi. Aren't you guys friends?"
Before you could protest any further, Jiro was already pushing through the crowd of dancers towards Shinso. She was stronger than you thought she was because every time you tried to stop her, she pushed you twice as hard. In no time you were a few feet away from him. And her.
"Look this doesn't seem like a good time..." you whined. "He's busy and I'll just see him another time."
"That asshole did something didn't he?"
"W-What?" you stammered.
"Well he must've if you're acting this way," Jiro scowled.
You sighed in disbelief. "Okay, fuck, I'll go say hi. Stay here."
Jiro nodded as she watched you go over to Shinso. Every step towards him felt like a step you needed to take in the opposite direction. Yaoyoruzo had thankfully stepped out and went to the bathroom with a friend. At least you didn't have to make small talk with her. Shinso didn't exactly look at you until you were actually in front of him.
"Uh hey," you said. "Um...what's up?"
He looked at you up and down. "You're here! I'm surprised," he grinned. "Nice outfit by the way. You sure can clean up nice."
You felt self conscious. "Yeah I guess," you managed to laugh. "I came because Jiro came too so...Now I'm here!"
"Well have fun then," he nodded.
The conversation felt like it was already over.
What the hell? you thought.
"Yeah you too," you smiled fakely. "Are you waiting for Yaoyoruzo?"
He avoided your gaze. "Y-Yeah, she told me to wait for her. We're just going around saying hi to people."
"Aw like a cute little couple," you gushed. It hurt to say those words but it was a small price to pay to see his reaction.
"We're not dating," Shinso scoffed. "Come on, (Name). You think she's my type?"
"As long as they look even slightly pretty and can say yes, then anyone can be your type," you retorted.
Shinso chuckled. "Why so prissy, princess? Jealous?"
You looked at him in horror. "Yeah, you're so right, Shinso. I'm so jealous. How could you tell?"
He rolled his eyes. Then, he looked at you with a smirk. "Since you clearly don't have a problem, why don't you go back to Jiro since she's coming back?"
That was the final straw. It was your cue to get out before you said something you would regret later.
"Fine. I'll go, don't wanna ruin your good time."
You didn't bother hearing what else he had to say. Jiro had gotten herself lost somewhere in the crowd and you promised you would find her later but right now you needed to get some fresh air. You grabbed a drink from one of the butlers going around and quickly drank it and put it right back on the tray. You headed to the backyard where a large swimming pool resided. In it lived blown up alligators and shark floats as well as some girls from your school. You sat at the farthest corner of the pool away from everyone else. You took off your heels that hurt too much and dipped your feet in the water. The pools blue reflective waves bounced off your troubled face.
How could Shinso just dismiss you like that? Over some girl nonetheless. He would always try to be nice to you before; even when he had a girlfriend back in middle school. But now it was like he couldn't wait to get rid of you. The way he acted to you just this really struck a nerve with you. You looked into the pool and tried to think of something else to prevent yourself from tearing up. From behind, you heard someone walk towards you.
"Everything okay, (Name)?"
It was Neito Monoma. You could tell from his voice. He didn't reek of alcohol like all the others boys but instead smelled of a nice vanilla scented cologne.
"Yeah, just a little tired," you smiled warily.
"Mind if I join you? I'm a little tired myself," he chuckled.
"Go ahead."
He took off his shoes as well and dipped his feet in the water next to yours. He was wearing blue cargo shorts with a white tee. He leaned back on his elbows and looked up at the night sky that was peppered with stars.
"It's a nice night," he commented.
You looked up. "Yeah...it is."
A butler at the front was walking around offering more drinks. He began to make his way toward the both of you.
"I could use a drink right now actually. This would be my first one," Monoma remarked. "How about you? You don't seem like the type to drink."
"This would be my 3rd."
Monoma grabbed two shot glasses filled with sake. He offered you one which you gladly accepted.
"Cheers?" he grinned.
"Cheers," you smiled.
The sound of glasses being hit could be heard. You threw your head back as you drank your shot. The warm alcohol ran down your throat in a slight burn. Monoma looked pleased at his drink and was calling the butler over for more.
"So how's the party been for you?" he asked.
"Okay," you shrugged. "It's a nice party in a nice house. Nothing to complain about here."
"But it sounds like you still have something to complain about anyways," he chuckled. "You should be happy now that school is over."
"I guess....But..."
"But?"
You fiddled with your thumbs. "But it's just....this year has just been so difficult. It doesn't really feel like a party to me."
Monoma nodded in understanding. "That is true. But that just means you deserve to party harder than any of us here. What's holding you back?"
"Shinso just has been so different lately. Too different. It feels like we're not even friends anymore," you admitted. You scooted closer to the edge of the pool so that the water was now past your ankles.
Another butler came with drinks that you both downed quickly.
"Shinso went through a lot too," Monoma commented. "He's dealing with it in his own way. Even if you don't agree with it, (Name), you can't do much about it."
"I know but it sucks," you whined. "Why Yaoyoruzo? Why did he want to get rid of me just to be with her? We've been friends over 10 years does that not matter now?"
You felt your heart grow heavy with sadness. At the front of the pool, a guy splashed his friends with water. Monoma reached for your hand to give it a squeeze.
"I think he's a jerk for doing that. You should know you don't deserve to be treated that way."
"Thanks," you muttered. "I just don't get it."
The water was at your knee now.
"Careful, (Name)," Monoma warned. He leaned over to grab both of your wrists to help you up.
You were caught by surprise. You could feel the warmth of his chest close to your face. Now he smelled like alcohol but it wasn't that bad. In his attempt to pull you up, you fell further into the water which in turn made him fall into the water as well. With a roaring splash you both fell into the cold water. Monoma looked at you shocked before laughing. You laughed as well, the motion moving the sadness away from your heart. Your black dress floated in the water but didn't reveal anything. Still you were self conscious. Monoma moved closer to you, his hands moving to your wrists again. His fingers gently moved up your palms till they were intertwined with yours. A blush crept onto your cheeks.
"Feeling better?" he whispered.
He looked down at you through his eyelashes that were coated in droplets of water. You were in the deep end of the pool and weren't good at swimming, so this prodded you into clinging onto him. Your fingernails dug into his flesh. He didn't seem to mind though.
"Here, let me help you," he laughed.
He moved your hands to his neck where you could cling onto him better. His hands moved to your lower back.
Would it feel like this with Shinso...?
You quickly shook the the thought away from your head. You looked up Monoma, your heart beating hard in your chest and in your ears. He brushed a wet lock of hair away from your face. The pools blue light illuminated his ocean blue eyes. He further closed the gap between you two and before you knew it, you were both kissing each other.
You didn't think you would go to Yaoyoruzo's party and then lock lips with Monoma. Your plan was to come in, have a drink or two and then go home. But things took a different turn. The pools cold water rippled between the two of you. You wrapped your arms even more around him to bring him closer. It was almost like you couldn't get enough. One of his hands moved down to your waist where he gave your hip a squeeze. You felt tipsy but you didn't care. You liked this new chilling feeling you were getting. You pulled back to catch your breath and then Monoma moved his lips to your neck. He lay kisses across your collar bone, making you feel like putty in his arms.
"Monoma," you whispered. "We can't keep doing this. We're in a public pool."
As if to add emphasis, a crowd of teens hollered at the both of you. He pulled back and looked around like he suddenly became aware of where he was. He looked at you sheepishly.
"Sorry, (Name)...I guess I got a little too caught up," he nervously laughed.
"It's okay," you giggled.
"Let's get out before you catch a cold."
Monoma got out of the pool first before helping you get out. You tried to avoid eye contact with any on lookers. The show had already ended but sometimes some people didn't get it.
"I have a jacket somewhere inside if you'd like?"
"Uh, I don't know how I feel walking in like this."
You pointed at the way your now drenched dress looked on your body. It was a little tight before but it now it was a bit too much. Monoma looked away, his face red from what he had seen.
"I'll get you a towel to help cover you and then we can head inside. How's that sound?"
"That's a good plan."
He managed to find you a clean towel that you then used to dry yourself off. You slipped your heels back on after properly drying yourself and then Monoma walked in front as you two headed back into the house. The crowd seemed to have grown in size. Jiro was dancing at the DJ booth again, this time her headphone jacks not plugged in. Monoma grabbed your hand so you wouldn't get lost. He guided you to the front door where he had a dark, navy blue jacket hanging. He helped you get it on as well.
"There," he said. "It looks good on you. Cute, actually."
"Thanks," you blushed.
The main door opened and in walked Shinso. He smelled like alcohol and cigarettes but underneath all that, there was sweetness lingering around him.
Perfume?
"(Name)?" he said surprised.
You didn't respond. Monoma cleared his throat. "Hey, Shinso."
Upon realizing that Monoma was there, Shinso looked at you. Really looked at you. He noticed that your clothes were still damp, he noticed that your lipstick had worn off, and that you were wearing a jacket that clearly wasn't yours. He looked at Monoma and noticed that he was wet too. Then his eyes drifted to your chest.
"I see that you two had some fun," he remarked.
You looked down and noticed you had small mark left behind from your encounter.
"Yeah I accidentally fell in the pool and dragged Monoma with me," you casually shrugged.
"I see," he nodded. He pursed his lips. "I'm guessing you're gonna go home now before your mom gets worried, right?"
"Actually, she's working a double tonight so I won't see her till morning."
Can't get rid of me that easily.
He looked over at Monoma in annoyance who returned the same look. These two clearly did not like each other.
"Well we're gonna get going somewhere else now. (Name), you wanna chill at my place?" Monoma asked, ignoring the glare he was getting from Shinso.
Whoa, bold move there.
You didn't know what to say at that moment. You didn't think Monoma would dare say that in front of Shinso. The atmosphere quickly changed. Slowly, you could see a cloud falling over Monoma's eyes. His body went limp and then stiff as he turned around began to walk away from you. You looked over at Shinso who was grinning like he had just won something.
"How could you?" you gasped. "You were so eager to get rid of me before and now you just-"
"I'm taking you home," Shinso interrupted. He grabbed you by the arm and began to walk you out of the house.
"What the fuck? No, that's not fair! You didn't want to talk or hangout with me and now you want to send me home? Just who do you think you are."
"I just think you got way over your head back there."
"And what's it to you?" you sneered.
You grabbed your arm back from him. He didn't restrain you too hard because if he had, he wouldn't have let go so easily. You two were at the bottom of the steps now. Shinso looked at you impatiently.
"Let's go," he growled.
"No."
"I'm going home too if you care, now lets get out here."
He reached into his pocket to pull out a phone and call a taxi. Before pressing the button though, he looked at you and at the jacket that you were wearing. He shook his head before taking off his hoodie and giving it to you. He wore a black shirt underneath with some metaphor written in kanji down the chest.
"Here, that jacket isn't gonna warm you up for shit."
You glared at him. "I'm okay with this."
"Could you stop being so stubborn and just put it on....please?" he said through gritted teeth. He looked at you with tired eyes. "I don't want you wearing that creeps stuff."
His words caught you by surprise. Shinso wasn't the type to say anything like that at all. You decided why not? You took of Monoma's jacket that you will wash and return, and then put on Shinso's hoodie. The inside smelled like him, like jasmine flowers. You stuffed your hands in the pockets and felt a pack of cigarettes. If he didn't ask for them you would throw them out later. He finished calling the taxi.
"Thanks, I guess," you muttered.
The taxi had quickly arrived and Shinso opened the door for you to get in. You crawled in and he plopped down next to you. The mansions loud music quieted down as you both sped away into the night. The car ride was quiet for the most part. Shinso rested his hand on his chin as he gazed out the window. You noticed a kiss mark peaking from the collar of his shirt. You began to feel annoyed by him.
"So you can do it but I can't?"
"What?" he said confused.
You pointed at the kiss mark.
"So?"
You blinked. You were in shock at how much of a jerk he was being. You quickly pulled down the collar of the hoodie to show off the mark you had gotten as well. He looked at you irritated.
"So, what I'm saying is, you can do it but if I do it, then it's a problem?" you growled.
He rolled his eyes. "It's a problem because Monoma doesn't actually like you, (Name)." He said it like you were some naive little kid.
"I know dumbass, doesn't mean I can't handle doing things like that."
"Doing things like what?" His eyes pierced yours with anger. The space in the car felt much smaller now.
"Just things...."
"What like going to his house to just "chill"?" he snickered. "Yeah, okay."
"What I do with other guys is none of your business since what you do with other girls is none of my business," you retorted.
"Maybe you're right," he muttered. "But clearly you only pulled that stunt because of Yaoyoruzo."
You felt tears prick the corner of your eyes. "Because it's not fair! She can throw a party and you're willing to show up and hang around her the whole night. But when it comes to me, the person who is, no was your best friend, you tell her to fuck off because of some pussy?" You let the words hang there before going right back in. "So yeah, excuse me for trying to comfort myself with someone else."
The driver awkwardly cleared his throat.
"I'm sorry...."
"Whatever."
You were beyond fed up at this point.
"I just...I don't think you need to do those kind of things. Not like me," he murmured.
"You don't have to do those things either," you sighed. You looked at him with softened eyes. "What if I throw a big party, huh? Will you follow me around all night and make out with me too?"
It was the liquor talking but you didn't care. Shinso turned his body towards yours. His hand slowly moved to your chin; where his thumb tilted your head up higher.
"I can kiss you too, you know."
Without a second thought you slapped his hand away. You looked away from him and turned your gaze to the window. You were already confused enough as it is. You didn't need him to add more things to mess with you. Shinso turned back to look out of the window as well.
"I'm sorry," he muttered again.
The rest of the ride went on in silence.