TW: Mentions of Past Traumatic Experience
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Once more Sirius felt like he had missed out with Remus...again. It was like the harder he tried to figure the boy out the more he slipped away from Sirius having any hope of understanding him. Not only had Remus gotten away with yet again not discussing himself, but for the next two weeks, he somehow managed to throw Sirius off-balance anytime a question about his past ever arose.
Sirius had nearly yelled at him after a harmless question of when Remus' birthday was, which resulted in a question about if Sirius had talked to Drommie yet. He did not appreciate Remus' attempt to constantly direct Sirius' questions back to Drommie, even if he hadn't talked to her yet.
Sirius hadn't talked to her about that, but he made a point of seeing her more, as much as she was willing to hang out with him over her friends or boyfriend. It resulted in them meeting once a week which was a big improvement from not even once a month. Of course, Sirius had to work hard to behave himself, at least around her.
When he was with his friends though, he would gag dramatically at the thought about what had caused Drommie's pregnancy, he knew enough to be grossed out. Also, Remus had to stop him several times from casually casting a curse on Ted Tonks' way when he saw him "coincidentally" in the halls.
"Oh please, Remus. Just a small curse."
"No, Sirius."
"But I won't get caught."
"It's not about getting caught," Remus explained with a sigh, his patience with the three of them nearly unending except for the rare times when he had none. Sirius was lucky that when he threatened to curse/hex Ted it had been at times when Remus was patient. He was pretty sure the 'non-patience Remus' who appeared at the most random of times would have whacked him over the head.
Sirius saw this look in Remus' eyes sometimes as if he'd like nothing more than to give his three friends a good shake. To be fair, they all deserved it.
However, at the moment his friend was merely very careful to make sure Sirius didn't attack an older student. Not because he was worried about either of them getting detention, but because Remus Lupin was just that nice.
Nicer than stupid Ted Tonks, anyways. Sirius was sure Remus would never get a girl pregnant. That was against the rules after all. Ted didn't seem to care for the rules; he was just a stinky Hufflepuff who better not hurt Drommie or there'd be hell to pay!
"I don't like him!" Sirius blurted out, for probably the fifteenth time that day as they stood leaning over the banister imagining the rather grotesque display of kissing that Andromeda and Ted were no doubt partaking in right this very moment. Well, Sirius was imagining it Remus was attempting to reason with Sirius explaining that it was much more likely that the older couple were in their classes at the moment than kissing in some closet. But anytime Sirius thought of his cousin he now imagined her slobbering all over Ted. Sirius' face crumpled with disgust.
"He's a nice guy, Sirius. You've stalked him on and off for nearly two weeks now," Remus answered casually with what seemed to be an infinite amount of patience. It was downright infuriating!
"And you've dodged my questions for two weeks!"
"And you've dodged talking to your cousin for two weeks."
Sirius wanted to scream in his face, but seeing how Remus often exhibited extreme restraint when Sirius was being obnoxious he figured he ought to show him the same courtesy.
"Fine. Then how about a harmless dung bomb?"
"Sirius," Remus said in that tone he got, which all his friends knew meant they weren't going to get to do anything fun or dangerous. So instead, they walked onwards to potions. At least ever since Sirius had successfully helped Remus pass the potions exam, even with what happened with them in the courtyard, his friend had been less reluctant about letting him sit with him instead of Peter.
In fact, they took turns. At least James and Sirius did. Peter struggled nearly as much as Remus did so he was useless about the whole thing. However, James and Sirius had to keep taking turns helping in potions because it was quite a task making sure Remus didn't fail. They had tried to ask Remus what the heck happened to him in potions but he had muttered allergies and avoided them for two days so they didn't push it anymore. That was another thing that wasn't fair.
Anytime they tried to ask more things or get to know Remus more he magically transformed to beginning-of-the-year Remus for a few days until they could show him they weren't going to question him further. Unbeknownst to Remus, they had used this to their advantage and would occasionally ask questions, knowing they were getting warmer to whatever it was Remus was still hiding if he ignored them for a day or two.
They had already realized it probably wasn't his mother or even his father, though he never talked about them. However, whatever it was definitely had something to do with his disappearances. This confused them to no end because if his disappearances were because of his mom then what more was there to hide? None of them would entertain the idea that he was the one dying, because such a thing was preposterous. After a few weeks of tossing back and forth different dumb theories they were well into February. Valentine's Day was just around the corner, and they finally became distracted by other things.
Because they really all did have other things on their mind, and they could only fret over Remus so long before other things came up. For example, James was more determined than ever to beat Lily in grades. This was proving difficult and meant he actually had to study for exams. Peter was just trying to keep his grades up, which was due a great deal to Remus who was a fantastic tutor who also helped James and Sirius, though Peter reported he was much more hesitant with them around.
Then, of course, Sirius had Drommie on his mind. He knew Remus, at least partly, was only using the subject as a shield to avoid discussing him. But Sirius also knew that as infuriating as it was, his friend was also right. He had to talk to his cousin. He just didn't know how to.
The past two times they hung out together he couldn't bring up the topic. Oftentimes they just had fun and reminisced on past happy memories, most of them when both their families had hung out together and therefore had been more tolerable. Anytime Sirius asked about Ted his cousin changed the topic with as much skill as Remus, and with a great deal more attitude when he tried to push it.
So Sirius felt like quite the failure, not helped by the fact the Regulus still hadn't been allowed to write him. He still hadn't heard from his parents, either.
It's not like Sirius was getting in too much trouble at school, although he did get his fair share of detentions. But he was one of the top students in almost all subjects, except Astronomy and History of Magic. But no one got good grades in History of Magic. And ever since Remus fell off the tower, he hadn't been able to focus much on Astronomy.
But even in the second term his mother and father hadn't written yet, not even a howler! His mother's last words to him before getting on the train after winter break was that he better keep his nose clean, and that was all he had heard from her in months. It left an ache in his chest and he had to remind his friends, and himself, that he didn't care if his lousy parents wrote to him, even if he looked sad at breakfast when the owls came. It wasn't because he didn't get mail from them, but because he was expecting something cool and top-secret in the mail from his uncle.
If his friends knew Sirius was lying, they all pretended not to for his sake. Though Sirius was pretty sure Remus was the only one who realized this as the other two kept excitedly asking him when his gift would arrive.
At least he had a great distraction from it all since Remus had finally told them about the passage he discovered, from Lily and her friends of all things, that led to the kitchens. So their nights had been filled with sweets and midnight snacks. Plus actual sleep, since Peter had gotten very good at slipping Remus a sleeping potion about half of the attempted times.
Then, of course, Valentine's Day itself was dumb, but it left such wonderful opportunities to prank stupid couples and certain stupid Hufflepuffs. It also helped that weeks had passed with no attacks. While the daily prophet continued to report Muggle's disappearance at an increased speed, Hogwarts had once more become a safe place. But there was still tension.
There had been several talks about unity amongst the whole school and about all the houses adding something unique to Hogwarts. But with the disappearance of Muggles more and more common, Sirius could have sworn the Slytherins' open disdain of Muggle-borns was becoming worse, though they kept it mostly to themselves. At least as the weeks passed the Slytherins around Remus had dwindled down to only one again. However, that one was the worst of them all. Sirius was still adamant that Snivellus was guilty...somehow.
The lack of Slytherins around their friend meant James and Sirius didn't have to keep a lookout so much and could resort more of their time to coming up with future pranks to make unsuspecting Slytherins pay. Even if they couldn't use Remus as an excuse for revenge, it was easy to spot a Slytherin mocking a Muggle-born or harassing them. So the few days before Valentine's had resulted in much planning and many disapproving glances from Remus, though he seemed to realize that getting them to stop was a lost cause.
Because come Monday the 14th of February, James and Sirius weren't going to be satisfied until havoc was wrecked!
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"Remus!" Sirius shouted, rushing over to his roommate. As usual Remus was up before them all and nibbling on some toast, his head stuck in a book.
"No," Remus responded, sounding vaguely amused. He didn't even bother to look up from the book he was reading, the swat.
"But..."
"No, Sirius."
"Oh come on, Remus!" pleaded James, rushing at the same pace as Sirius.
"No, James."
Peter joined them at his usual seat, "But..."
"No, Peter."
Remus shot each of them down, and by his tone, it was clear he would keep doing so. James gave Sirius a look that said, he's a lost cause.
"Oh come on, Lupin! Don't be such a wet blanket," Patricia called as she walked past her usual seat at the table to come closer to them, grinning mischievously.
Remus looked up from his book surprised, and four startled looks turned to Patricia who sat next to Remus, ruffling his hair fondly and laughing at the annoyed look she got. It was kind of cute really. as Patricia seemed to view Remus as her little brother. Though it filled James with a bit of jealousy and a strong impulse to prove that "he didn't care about Patricia".
"We never see you anymore," James protested, and Patricia scoffed, but ruffled his hair as well. James did an altogether terrible job at proving he didn't care about Patricia and often ended up sounding like a stuck-up child, which amused the others a lot.
"That's because unlike you lot I've got exams coming out of my ears," she pointed out with a groan.
"Funny. I only see earwax," Sirius teased easily. He, for one, was thrilled that Patricia had continued to train them. Though the "lessons" had all but stopped since Remus' accident. Sirius knew she hung around Remus more often, but the boy hid it from his friends like he hid most things.
It wasn't until Sirius "accidentally" stumbled across them in a courtyard playing chess that he realized it wasn't just Severus and Lily that Remus was hanging out with. Sirius knew he should be happy that their loner friend had a few other people to hang out with. However, he couldn't seem to find it in himself.
He was sure it was because when he had found Remus and Patricia, it was on an evening when Remus was supposed to be exploring a way to get into the Forbidden Forest with his mates. Naturally, Sirius had been rather crossed with them both. But that was nearly a week ago and Sirius prided himself on being quick to forgive and on being mature.
"Har har, very funny. But seriously, I had a lot to get done," she scoffed.
"That didn't stop you from hanging out with Remus," Sirius pointed out smugly, and just a tad bit crossly. Patricia gave him an amused look he didn't like at all followed quickly by Remus' "be nice" look.
"Well, if you don't want to go into the Forbidden Forest with me, fine," she responded nonchalantly, then attempted to get up.
"Wait! No, no! You are always welcome here," Sirius quickly rectified the matter, swallowing his pride for a chance at adventure and danger.
"That's better. Now, the Forbidden Forest can wait. We have pranks to play first," she responded excitedly, with an eager gleam of mischief in her eyes that Remus noticed with exasperation.
"Oh, not you too!" Remus exclaimed, sounding stressed. Sirius laughed. Maybe the three of them couldn't convince Remus to participate, but the four of them definitely could.
It took all of the rest of the breakfast to catch Patricia up on their plans and to finally convince Remus to participate, but they managed. It seemed like the day was going to be a good one.