Chapter 33
Want to read the Mature version? Head over to reamstories.com/TessaT
The Mature version will be posted for free once the pg version is finished posting.
Enjoy
___________________
"Claudia we need to head back. It's past midnight. You haven't eaten in over sixteen hours. If we keep going like this, I'll be forced to carry your fat ass back to the castle. Please don't' force me to," Theo whined. "You might break my back."
Huffing I come to an immediate stop. "I'm scared. How do I confront him with this new information?"
"You sit down and let him explain in full detail what transpired during his moment of weakness." I hear Taylor plop down next to me. My eyes lost in the distance.
We had been roaming around the forest for hours in human form. Courtesy of a guard we received clothes during one of our pit stops. Apparently Caden figured I might want to change back into my human form and being the possessive man that he is, didn't want another male to see me naked.
"Yes, his millionth moment of weakness." Laying down, I whimper at the pain in my chest. I hated my weakness to him, to our bond. I wanted to trust him, to curl up in his lap and listen to his soothing heartbeat.
"He is a guy Claudi, he will screw up a million more times before you both die happily married for years." I knew Theo was right. It didn't mean I was grateful for the information.
"He has been contacting us you know. Every ten minutes to demand an update on your mental health and if we were returning anytime soon. If he spoke of love to that female lunatic he had to have been thinking about you. You know neither I nor Theo were fond of Caden in the beginning, but now...he has grown on us Claudia. We see the way he watches you. Love clearly shown in his eyes. That man would give you the stars if you asked for them."
"You can't know that Taylor. He could have loved her at a point in time." Maybe I was arguing to find some kind of logic.
"Actually we do know Claudi. We've trained with Jason a few times and being Caden's best friend he knows him like the back of his hand. Caden trusts Jason with his life. He told Jason his deepest darkest secrets."
"And?" What am I missing?
"Caden loathed Jessica. I mean he scrubbed his body raw each night after their...encounters. He had rules for Jessica when it pertained to the bedroom. No lights, was the number one rule that had to be followed no matter what. He didn't want to see who he was banging Claudi. Yes his actions are horrible, but if you see it from a guy's point of view she meant absolutely nothing to him than a quick lay."
"Harsh." Will I be a quick lay?
"Shut up before I smack you. We need to take you to the eye doctor if you are blind to the way he gazes at you. I am your brother, it's disgusting to mention. That man of yours, if given the chance would lock you up in his room and devour your body for weeks. Food would of course be brought in, but you would become pregnant by the end of the month. No doubt about it. We all see it Claudia. His eyes rake in each and every detail of your body every opportunity he gets."
I knew he was right. I've felt Caden's eyes on my figure multiple of times. "I jumped the gun didn't I?" Laying back on the leaf covered forest floor I wipe my hands down my face. Stupid Claudia!
"Yea think?" Theo nudges me with his foot. "You let that slut get to you. Which we figured would happen. One month of getting to know your mate wouldn't erase all the pain you two have put each other through. You two have an extremely long path to take before the doubt vanishes."
"When did you become wise Theo?" He reminded me why I've clung to him as a brother.
"Since the day your brother introduced me to you. His exact words were 'you even think about undressing her, I'll kill you with a dagger to your boys'. I value my manhood Claudi. I wised up right then and there."
"You would Taylor." Smiling I place my hands behind my head.
"I'm your big brother, it's my job."
"Yes it is Tay. You've done an excellent job." I reach out and softly punch him.
"Thank you Claudia. I know you've had hard decisions to make these past years, but I want you to know I'll always be here. No matter what."
Rolling over I rest my head on his elbow. With all the drama these past few weeks, Taylor and I haven't had our sibling bonding time.
My head rolls off his elbow without warning. Turning over to yell at him for my wounded pride I watch confused as he marches away. I try to run after him, but Theo stops me. "He is meeting up with a guard. Caden sent one with food and drinks. The complete gentlemen."
Twiddling my thumbs I wait for Taylor to return. To my surprise he had his arms full of bags and a large blanket. "Did he send the whole pantry?" Laughing I reach up to help set up the late night picnic.
"Seriously. Does he believe we are pigs?" Theo mocks.
"You are a pig Theo." Staring at him straight faced, I bite the inside of my lip to stop the laugh from bubbling up and escaping.
"Watch what you're saying missy otherwise I'll have to get even." Holding up a chicken leg he points it at me as he speaks. "And I don't do nice."
"I'll sick my guards on you." Cackling I rub my hands together. "Or I'll tell Caden you kissed me."
His eyes widen like saucers. Fear evident clearly showing. "You wouldn't dare." Pushing a few feet in between us, he holds his hands up in surrender. "I love you as a sister. Please don't' have me murdered."
Opening the food storage containers I pull out a slice of pizza. "I guess Caden didn't know what we all liked to eat. Pizza, fried chicken, Chinese food, burgers and fries and I believes there might be a steak or two in there." Ignoring Theo's request to live I munch down two full slices of peperoni and one combination.
Laying back on the blanket stuffed to the max I sigh out in content with a full stomach.
"Claudia?"
"Yea, Tay?"
"Caden wrote you a letter. He had the guard deliver it to me along with the food. I was ordered to give it to you once you had finished eating." Handing me a letter is sit up and stare at it.
"What do you think is in it?" I couldn't take my eyes off it.
"My guess? It's probably an explanation about what really happened the night he said 'I love you' to Jessica." In my head I knew Taylor to be right.
"Stay with me as I read it. Please?" I beg. I felt it in my heart I would need his advice once I finished reading.
"I wouldn't leave even if you demanded it." Nodding my head to his reply, I open the letter with shaky fingers. No point in postponing.
______________________________________________________________
Dear Claudia,
I firstly want to say how deeply sorry I am for blocking you from my mind. I realized too late, with the help from my mother that by keeping my walls up you came to the realization Jessica's words were true.
I promise you with all my heart, I never once told her I loved her. I know you may not believe me. It's the absolute truth. No more lies between us.
My walls were up because of the anger and brutality I felt for her during the trail. I've never felt cheated and manipulated before. I feared if you knew what I had been thinking you would fear me. I couldn't chance you being frightened by me. The mere thought forced me to block you out. For that I am deeply sorry. I pray you will forgive me for my rashness.
As for that night of my declaration of love? Yes, I whispered those three words. Not to her. Never to her.
Nearly four months before your birthday I had one of my worst mental breaks. I had holed myself up in my room for more or less two weeks. Not eating or drinking. I wallowed in my own self pity. My family and friends would try to bring me out of my stupor. To tell you the true I honestly can't remember what transpired in the first week. Jason and Nikolai were my voices of reason during my final days of numbness.
Apparently I had found a piece of blue dress fabric. Jason informed me I had been delirious while awake. I spoke three words and only three. He said I sat in one spot, staring off in a trance at the fabric in my hands. Whispering 'I love you' over and over again until I pasted out from fatigue.
I do not know if in my mind I had been trying to reassure myself you loved me or if I said it more than once you would miraculously appear in my line of sight.
I know for a fact I had not spoken those words to her, Claudia. Jason and Nikolai had been in the far corner when she broke into my personal room. And we both know those two would have given me hell if I had uttered those words to her.
Claudia, I know I've done a messed up job on our relationship. Proving to you I'm a changed man is harder than I thought it would be. I guess I believed once you turned eighteen we would live happily ever after. With no up's and down's. How wrong I was. I've screwed up more times than I like to admit since we've met. And I fear I will continue to as the days go on. All I can pleadingly ask of you is forgiveness for my future mistakes and bad decisions.
From now on, my mind will be open for you to dig around. I will take the chance of you fearing me over seeing your back as you walk away once more.
I know it's a lot to ask of you right now. Once you've finished reading this letter if you wouldn't mind meeting me at our little sanctuary.
Yes, we promised to write down our pasts. For this conversation I believe it would be best if I reassured you in person.
Please my love. Let me beg for your forgiveness in person. Today without you by my side isn't what I want to repeat.
If you agree. I'll be waiting your presence.
Love, your deeply apologetic Mate
______________________________________________________________
Rereading the letter approximately four times I fell the doubt slowly flow away. If Nik had been there in the room, Caden's words had been the truth.
As painful as it may have been, Nik would have told me if Caden had confessed his love for another.
Shaking my head at my stupidity I realize I shouldn't have listened to Jessica's lies. She would say anything to get out of jail time.
"I'm going to him." Standing up I sprint off into the direction of the hidden waterfall.
Reaching the sand, I let out a slight gasp at the man on bended knees at the water's edge. A single rose in his fingers.
"It seems as if all I do is push you away. A real relationship is confusing to me. I honestly do not know what to do." I watch as he looks up to the sky. We may have distance between us, but with the moon high in the sky I could clearly see the shimmering of tears in his eyes.
"It's new to me as well Caden." Feeling a bit brave, I force my legs to finish the distance separating us. "I shouldn't have listened to her. I shouldn't have let her words get to me. But I did and I'm genuinely sorry."
"Please forgive me. I swear to you, I never once uttered those words to her," he pleads. His hands reaching out for mine as our gazes lock in a desperate attempt at reading each other's eyes.
"I should be the one asking for forgiveness. You are right, you know. Nik would have slaughtered you if you declared your love for another. As you are here in the flesh and blood, I know your words to be true." Gently pulling him up I wrap my arms around his waist. Holding on for dear life.
"I'll forgive you, if you forgive me. Deal?" He whispers in my ear. Gently rubbing his face against mine. The softest touch sending small shivers down my spine.
"Deal." Living in the moment, I brave my nerves and press a small kiss to his lips.
Being content in finally realizing our errors he repositioned us to the sand with my legs over his thick thigh.
In my mind I couldn't believe we hadn't fought. A simple apology on each side was all it took to right our relationship.
"Promise me Claudia, if you are frightened, confused or worried you will come to me first. Let me explain what happened. This running away needs to end. Not only for my sanity, but for yours as well." His warm hands on my arms relax me further.
Sighing I lean my head against his chest. "I know and I promise you I'll come to you first."
"Marcus and I felt your anxiety through the bond when you left the castle. It terrified us. To tell you the truth, for the next few days, I'll be attached to your hip. One day apart and the loss we felt was indescribable. Never again Claudia."
Silently agreeing we fall into a pleasant silence.
"I'm sorry to interrupt your highnesses. Rogues have been spotted four miles out. We need to return to the castle before they have a chance to kidnap the Princess once more," a guard I've never seen states.
"Wolf or human form?" Caden questions as we begin our trek back to the castle walls.
"Approximately twenty wolves. They passed by Shantell without giving notice to her. She figures they are completely intent on their mission to kidnap the Princess for their boss, they ignore their surroundings," he explains as we continue to walk.
Wouldn't it be faster to run? As that thought entered my mind, I watch with wide eyes as nearly fifty wolves surround us. Taylor directly in front of me and Theo to my left. "How many wolves did you have follow me today?"
"Forty-five in total. With your life on the line I couldn't take the chance you would be abducted while out thinking." All for me? Damsel in distress apparently.
"How many did you have?" I question with pointed eyes. He better say more than one. If I'm going to be followed by a small army he will be as well.
"I had ten guards plus Jason when I made my way to the waterfall. Once you met up with me, I had mind scout out the forest. Searching for any and all disruptions," he says without a hint of worry.
Ten? That's it?
I swear Nik is going to teach me how to truly fight tomorrow. If he denies me, I'll have Commander Togen teach me. Caden is out of the question. He will take it easy on me and I will not learn a single thing I don't already know from Nik.
With a light squeeze of his hand on mine he shifts next to me. Following suit, we are quickly underway. Racing towards the safety of the castle walls.
__________________________________
How did you like it?
Do you think she gave in to easily?
Please don't forget to vote, comment and fan if you enjoyed the chapter.