i suck for not updating so quick but here's the chapter you guys have been waiting for!
six weeks later
june
"you guys ready?" dev walks into the kitchen. i look over at him and nod.
"i just have to finish feeding little joseph here because he's a slow eater." yes, i did name joeys and i's kid after him, i thought it would be cute to do it, his name is joseph but dev and i called him jojo for short.
"he's a slow eater, just like joey." dev mumbled. i stayed quiet as i fed him. i nod and feed him the last spoonful of eggs. "yeah, he was wasn't he?"
"done!" jojo exclaims. i giggle and set the spoon down. i take him out of his chair and pick him up, kissing his cheek.
suddenly i hear the doorbell ring. dev and i looked at each other confused before making our way towards the front door. i opened it and stood there in shock when i saw jen and soph standing there. i gulped and looked at them both. "mrs. birlem, soph."
"you guys have a lot of balls showing your face here." dev interrupts.
"june, dev, i think it's finally time we talk." dev shook his head, he was about to close the door but i stopped him. i set joseph down and nod. "come in."
~
"how old is he?" soph asked as i held joseph in my lap
"a year old." i told her.
"can i hold him?" jen spoke up. i look over at dev who just shrugged. i look back at jen and nod, handing her joseph carefully.
she gasped softly as she carried him in her arms. she sets him down on her lap and played with his small hands. "hi there little guy, i'm your grandma jen." she said in a baby voice.
soph took one of his hands and played with his fingers. "he looks a lot like joey when he was a baby." she looks over at me. a small smile creeped up on my face. i nodded slowly, agreeing.
"he does, ive seen the pictures." i spoke softly.
"he gave you the box?" jen looks at me.
i look at her and nod. "he told dev to give me his box and this heartlocket." i place my hand over the heart locket, smiling as i started thinking about joey again.
"what did the box have inside?" soph asked.
i sighed. "his baby pictures, a bandana and some baby shoes" i chuckle a bit and look down at joseph's feet. "i'm guessing they were his once."
"joey bought some stuff for the little guy." i turn my head and look at dev confused. he looks at me and nods.
"before he got locked up, he bought joseph a bunch of shit to give him once he was about one. he went on a shopping spree basically." dev gets up from the couch and walks through the halls to grab something from the room. the three of us looked at each other confused but we just shrugged it off and waited for dev.
"since we didn't really have a birthday party for the little guy, i wasn't sure if it was the right time to give it to him, buttt i figured it was the right time now." dev walks back with a huge gift bag, i widened my eyes at the sight of it.
dev sets down the bags in front of us and exhales loudly. "joey got a little too excited and blew all his money on his son." dev says as he sat back down on the couch.
i pull the bag close to me and open it slowly, i saw that a bunch of clothes were from some famous brands such as gucci, nike, adidas, vans etc. i take out a couple of clothes and smile widely at how cute they were. as i looked through the clothes i immediately started thinking about joey again, i felt a pain in my chest almost like i wanted to burst out crying.
it hurt having to think about him because when i think of all the moments we spent together then i end up remembering his lifeless body laying there, how his hand dropped when his heart stopped. the most painful part was seeing him take his last breath then closing his eyes. it hurt knowing i wouldn't be able to spend any more time with him.
i put the clothes i had taken out back inside the bag. i took the bags and walked back to my room to leave them. i set them down on the bed.
i looked over at the wooden box that used to be joeys, it was resting on the nightstand. i sit at the corner of the bed and place the box in my lap. i take a deep breath and open it up slowly.
the box was filled with all of his pictures, some were from when he was in high school and others were from when he was a kid, most were family pictures.
i scanned through the pictures, one that really caught my eye was a picture of bella and joey together. i never really knew how bells looked like, but the way joey described her she must've been beautiful.
i took the photo out and studied it closely. she really was beautiful. she had these really nice blue eyes and long eyelashes. her hair was brown but it looked like she had some blonde highlights in it too.
the picture showed bella hugging joey from behind, he was really small in the picture maybe ten years old who knows. they both had a huge smile on their face.
"what are you looking at?" i heard a voice say.
i look up and see jen standing there with her hands clasped together and a weak smile on her face. i didn't say anything, instead i just hold the picture up.
"how could you think joey killed his own sister when he loved her so much." my voice cracked, i really wanted to cry again right now.
jens smile fades away. she walks over to me and sits down next to me. she took her hands into mine. "i know this is so hard for you june, but this is hard for me too. i didn't know i'd be losing another one of my kids."
i fought back my tears, i didn't to cry right now, but even still talking about joey made me very emotional. i don't think i'd ever be able to move on from him.
"it wasn't my idea to call the cops on him." i look over at jen. "what?" she nodded slowly, she closed her eyes, a tear escapes.
"after joey ran away, i was going to chase after him but his father pulled me back. he told me he needed to be locked up because he was dangerous. i didn't think he'd actually call the cops on his own son."
"i wanted to try to look for joey, but i couldn't because i didn't know where he was or how to get in touch with him. i just wanted to bring him back home and hold him in my arms, telling him everything's going to be okay but i couldn't." jen took a deep breath. "eventually i had enough of his father and him controlling me so i divorced him last month, by the time i wanted to fix things with joey... he was already gone, it was too late."
she hid her head in the palm of her hands and sobbed silently. she brought her head back up and looked at me. "you have no idea how much i miss him june. i have so much regret and guilt i can't help but blame myself for his death. i'm the reason he's gone."
i wrapped my arms around jen and let her sob against my shoulder. i was starting to feel sorry for her. its hard to lose your son especially when he was so young. it was hard for both of us right now.
after we both calmed down from crying we decided to look through the pictures that were in the box. sophia joined us and as well as dev and joseph.
we all laughed at some of the funny ones that joey had taken when he was younger. my favorite one was when he was wearing this black jacket and had something dangling between his lips (pic on top)
"i want to ask you guys something." jen says out of the blue. dev and i look at each and nod. "what is it?"
"soph and i along with kash, we're moving back to santa cruz. LA has been a pain these past years and we want to start fresh, away from the pain we've all gone through and.." jen pauses for a second. she looked over at soph. soph looked at her and nodded, taking her mother's hand into her own.
"we want you guys to come with us." jen looks back at me.
i sat there in silence. i didn't know what to say, should i go or should i stay? i looked down at joseph, he looked so much like joey. then i thought for a moment, what would joey want?
i know what joey would want. he'd want his son to be able to get to know his family. he'd want joseph to meet his grandmother despite the pain she might've caused her son. he'd want him to meet his aunt soph, the one who loved him through everything and always believed him. he'd want him to meet his uncle kash and get to know him because his father couldn't do that himself.
he'd want him to be surrounded by the family he never really got to spend his life with. he'd want him to be happy and safe. joey wouldn't want his son to turn out like him when he's older, he wanted him to be better than he was.
i took a deep breath before looking over at dev. dev met my eyes, he nodded slowly and wiped the tear that escaped down his eye.
i look back at jen. i nod slowly. "we'll go with you." i spoke softly. "but only because joey would want us to." i look down at joseph and play with his tiny hand. "he'd want his son to live the best life he could ever live."
-
a month later
after we agreed to move with jen and soph to santa cruz we all tried our best to get out of LA as soon as possible. however dev didn't join us.
dev stayed in LA because he wanted to persue a career in law. i was surprised because all he did was break the law. however i was happy for him and he promised to visit us once in a while.
we all moved into a house, it was the birlems old house. soph and jen had their own room while i shared one with joseph. the room i stayed in was joeys old room. jen and soph offered to take joeys old stuff out so joseph and i could have more space but i declined. i wanted to have some things around me to remember joey by, it's the only way i would be able to heal after everything that has happened.
once joseph was older i told myself that i'd tell him everything about his father and how he made his mother very happy in the little time they got to spend with each other.
joey was an amazing guy and i wanted joseph to know that. his father sacrificed himself so his son could have a life he wished he had.
and as much as i didn't want to, i know joey would've wanted me to find someone and move on but i don't think i could. joey was my first love and he'll be my last. he'll always have a special place in my heart and i wouldn't want anyone to replace him. i love him so much and i'll continue to love him until the end of time.