"Clifford, stop messing with my goddamn radio!" Ashton groans for what has to be the millionth time as the song shifts dramatically from Ashton's Coldplay CD to some pop station. "Hey! Go back! I liked that song!"
I look up to the dashboard, catching a glimpse of flaming red hair and a pale arm being swatted away from the media controls. Michael Clifford, the boy I only met this morning, sits in shotgun, his legs stretched out in front of him. Ashton's next to him in the driver's seat, as my father obviously doesn't trust me enough to let me drive Anne's car.
Which was partly good, because I don't really trust myself with it either. Drivers have complete power over the safety of all their passengers, and in between the hatred towards the owner of the car and one of the teenage boys seated in the backseat, I completely see my father's point.
But the one part I really don't understand is how, exactly, I ended up in the backseat of Anne's black Lexus, squished in between the cute brunette boy and the kid I hate more than anyone else.
That's right. LUKE.
So, how did I end up here?
Well, I guess it's not that difficult to explain. The moment I stepped into the garage to assess my fate Michael had already called shotgun and actually sat there before anyone could protest.
So that basically left Luke, Calum, and I to fend for ourselves in the backseat, literally having to fight for space. Naturally I was placed in the middle, considering that all of Ashton's idiot friends are over six-feet-tall and long-legged opposed to barely five-feet-tall and short-legged myself.
Now here I sit, in the middle of the two popular giants, feeling more small and insignificant than ever. I don't know what it is, but for some odd reason, with my left thigh pressed against Luke's and my right pressed against Calum's, it makes me question exactly why I didn't even try to fight my father's decision to make me travel with them.
Naturally, Anne and my father are five minutes ahead of us in the family's ten-year-old Honda, with plenty of room in the backseat. I really don't understand how I couldn't have easily just went in their car, seeing it would spare me this whole mess.
Then again, Anne and my father probably wanted their privacy, something I'm naturally obligated to respect.
The only thing keeping me sane right now is the sunlight that pours into the car from all angles. It is a beauty that no one can take away from me, not even Luke.
"I hate Coldplay, though. They're too depressing." Michael replies, Ashton sighs. I don't know what it is, but Michael seems to have some invisible power over Ashton, allowing him to get away with more than the average person under his jurisdiction. "Besides, this is a road trip. Live a little."
"Fine. Then change it." Ashton gives in easily, as I knew he would, and seconds later "Anaconda" is blaring through the car speakers.
Yikes.
Possibly the worst song anyone could ever write, I instantly cringe and block my ears.
It's almost like a universal reaction among the three of us in the backseat as I grope around for my iPod, Luke for his iPhone, and Calum for his headphones to block out the horrible song.
Well, on the bright side, at least Luke and I have something in common.
It doesn't take long for me to fish out my earbuds and iPod and scroll through my song list, quickly choosing an Ed Sheeran song. Honestly, right now I'd take anything to drown out the awful screeching of Nicki Minaj. I close my eyes, getting lost in the deep, soothing tone of Ed Sheeran's Tenerife Sea. Usually cheesy love songs like these I can't stand, but it's Ed Sheeran.
He's definitely an exception.
"Damn. My iPod's dead." Over the blissful sound of Ed's voice, out of nowhere I hear Calum say, his voice somewhat distant. "Luke, did you happen to bring an extra?"
"I didn't, sorry." Luke replies equally as distant, but I can still detect the slight bitterness in his voice. It wouldn't surprise me if he was lying; he probably owns ten million iPods with their own personal rechargeable chargers.
"Oh. Okay." Calum replies casually, although skeptical. I mean, I would be too, if the world's biggest asshole were talking to me in a cynical monotone.
But now poor Calum is resorted to a dead iPod, one car window, and nothing to drown out Michael's awful choice in music.
I don't know what possesses me to do so, but soon I find myself without music in my left ear and holding out the extra earbud to Calum. That small gesture is enough to make him smile and thank me, taking it without reluctance.
No one should have to live through the torture of Nicki Minaj.
"Oh, thanks." Calum quietly chuckles, accepting the earbud and sticking it in his left ear.
With Calum now listening, I quickly switch songs to Arctic Monkeys, shoving the iPod towards him indicating he can change it if he wants.
Neither of us move as the song progresses, each beat of the drums like the beat of my own heart. Fast-paced, relatable, predicable, and yet unpredictable at the same time.
Finally able to relax, I close my eyes and focus more on "Do I Want To Know?" than "Anaconda," letting the rhythm take me into unimaginable places. Each chord, lyric, and verse I have memorized by heart and I follow along internally, simply savoring the moment.
I feel something stir from beside me, and it doesn't take long to tell that it's Calum, based on the side that the action is coming from.
"Fuck, yes."
I reopen my eyes only to meet Calum's brown ones, glistening as he gestures to my iPod happily.
"You seriously have the best taste in music." He says, while scrolling through the content of my iPod, something I usually don't let anyone touch.
But I guess Calum is an exception, too.
I feel a small blush creep across my cheeks as he switches the song to Green Day, "21 Guns." I turn my face slightly away from him, just enough that it's out of his range of eyesight and soon I come face-to-face with Luke Hemmings.
Well, kind of.
His blue eyes are sealed shut, his arm propped up against the tinted window of the Lexus. A pair of nice quality headphones frame his features, a metal lip ring is clenched in between his plump pink lips, and his blonde quiff unnaturally fluffy-looking as always.
If I didn't know any better, I'd say Luke looks extremely harmless as he sleeps; but when his icy blue eyes actually have sight in them, everything changes. Then he no longer has the peaceful demeanor of an angel but instead one of a ghost: a ghost of my past.
My eyes eventually close as the song shifts into a more peaceful one, as I begin to relax. I stay like this for seconds, minutes, possibly even hours, before the awful music blasting from the front seat is turned down by Michael, who gives the backseat a once-over before speaking.
"Is the blonde idiot asleep, or do I have to censor my words still?"
"What blonde?" Ashton asks nonchalantly. "Luke?"
"Yes, Ashton, who else would I be talking about? Calum?" Michael responds sarcastically. "Anyways, what's up with him? Like, I know he was grounded, cock-blocked, and dumped all in the same week--but what's really up with him? He's been acting weird ever since we got to your place."
Ashton's tone shifts, clearly caught off-guard. "I-I don't know! Ask him, not me."
"No, but I can't ask him." Michael replies, nearly whining. "He won't give me a straight answer, not about her."
My breath hitches.
Her?
Me?
Ashton pauses for a moment. "Well, whatever it was, it's clearly over now. And that's all that matters."
"No, but it isn't." Michael argues. "It's clearly still an issue--they can barely look at each other without flinching."
"I... No. I'm not getting involved with this." Ashton replies, his voice distant.
"Oh, but I am." Michael says. "There's something up with the two of them, I just know it."
Ashton merely sighs in response. "You're venturing into some pretty deep shit, Clifford."
"I know." He replies, overly smugly. "Oh, and speaking of deep shit, I kind of have to take one, if you know what I mean."
Suddenly the car lurches forward as my eyes shoot open, my hands gripping the seat underneath me unusually tight, as if trying to secure my balance if the car spun out of control.
But it turns out I don't need to, as Ashton remains in control of the car and its capabilities, and when I notice this I sigh out of relief.
I really don't need another repeat of history, not today.
"Seriously? You couldn't have gone before we left?" Ashton groans, Michael shrugs.
"Well, I was kind of preoccupied." He defends. "But-"
"With what? Flirting with my sister?" Ashton continues, rolling his eyes at the red-haired boy.
"Well, yes, but no." Michael sighs, I raise my eyebrows although they can't see me. "Please, Ash, I gotta go. I'll be fast, I promise."
Ashton gives in again, switching lanes and merging onto the highway. "Fine. Five minutes. And that's all you get."
Soon we're in the middle of the parking lot, and I lift my gaze up to the window to take in the green grass, cement pavement, and wide blacktop of a typical Pennslyvanian service station.
"Meet me back here in five minutes or else we're leaving without you." Ashton jokingly warns, finally pulling into an empty parking space and slowing the car to a complete stop.
But Michael is already out of the car, literally sprinting for the bathroom.
Ashton chuckles a bit before opening his door, stretching out his legs and eventually getting out of the car, walking towards the service hut.
I pull my one earbud from my ear and attempt to follow suit, having to climb over Luke in the process. As Calum had fallen asleep too, I didn't really want to disturb him.
I didn't really want Luke awake either, but as it becomes apparent only seconds later that I did wake him up anyways.
"Hey, Kace!"
I stop walking at the sound of his voice, that nickname.
No, I don't just stop. I freeze.
He takes advantage of the opportunity to catch up to me, and it now occurs to me how much he's grown over the years. He's nearly a giant, towering over me by at least a foot, maybe more.
"Lucas." I say, merely out of surprise than anything, gulping as I look up at him. "S-Sorry, did I wake you?"
"Uh, kind of." He says, squinting in the bright sunlight. He has sunglasses, why is he still squinting? "But it's all okay."
"Oh. Um, sorry." I clear my throat awkwardly, taking a few steps forward. "So, can I-"
"Wait." His deep voice commands, and for some reason I do. "Please, just... Talk to me."
Well, at least he said please that time.
Obeying, I stay silent, simply waiting for him to continue.
"Are you still mad at me?" He questions next, his eyes filled with a false sense of concern. "Because that was a long time ago, and I-"
"Is that a legit question?" I huff. Of course I'm still mad; common sense shoud've told him that.
Luke is quick to fire back, rather defensively. "Sorry, I wasn't sure! It's just... Things are really tense between us, and-"
"What, is that supposed to be an apology?" I shoot back, he does a double take. "Because-"
"Whoa, wait. Did you say an apology?" He raises an eyebrow. "Kace, I didn't-"
"Don't even try to defend what happened, Lucas. You-"
"It was an accident!" Luke protests, his voice filled with desperation. "Accidents happen!"
"No, but it wasn't just an accident." I hiss, glaring at him. "You ruined my life."
He's silent for a moment. "I did?"
"You honestly don't remember?" I blink once, pausing. He doesn't remember?
His eyebrows furrow, his blue eyes overshadowed. "Of course I do, but... It was just a plate of spaghetti, Kace. That's it."
I stare him, staright into his puppy-dog face and all, and push through the urge to want to slap him. "It wasn't just a plate of spaghetti! It was my past, present and future, all destroyed!"
Luke still looks confused as he stares at me. "How can a plate of spaghetti ruin your life so much? It was just a-"
I shake my head, holding back tears. Five years of holding my emotions inside, and now they suddenly decide to show up. Great. "No, it wasn't just that. It was you, too. You completely ruined my life."
"But... I still don't-"
"God, what can't you understand about this?" I snap, his eyes widen. "It had nothing to do with spaghetti, but everything to do with you."
Luke's silent for a minute, then responds cooly. "Okay, then."
And then he starts to walk away.
Again.
I don't know how I resist the urge this time to go after him, but I do. It takes all of my willpower not to storm into the mens' bathroom and confront him again, but somehow I control my anger and shift it towards walking back to the car.
I storm right up to Ashton, who sits sideways in his seat while talking to Michael, just waiting for Luke and I to return back to the car. I feel slightly guilty for making them have to wait until I realize it's me that's holding them up anymore-it's Luke.
"You okay, Kaci?" Ashton looks at me uneasily, peering up at me with those innocent hazel eyes.
"Oh, me? Yeah, I'm fine." I fake a smile at him who nods unwillingly. "Actually, do you mind if I drive for a bit?"
Anything to get as far away from Luke as possible.
Ashton blinks once, uncertain, then gets up from the seat. "Uh, yeah. Sure, okay."
"Thanks." I mumble, gratefully taking the keys from him and slide into the driver's seat, next to Michael. He doesn't say anything, thankfully, and just nods in my direction, as if not to comment on the whole situation.
As I start the car, I can't help but wonder if everything would've been different had I not met Luke five years ago, when he was as arrogant and ignorant as ever. But everything was much simpler before I met him, perhaps even better.
Actually, I take that back. It was infinitely better.
I don't know, maybe I thought talking to Luke again would actually help. Maybe I thought he'd matured, that we could work through our differences and common pasts and move on, but obviously that didn't happen.
Ironically, it turns out that he hasn't changed at all and made everything a whole lot worse.
I shouldn't have been too surprised, actually. That's just what Luke Hemmings does.
He fucks up.
And then he walks away.
A/N: a bit of foreshadowing... aka ASH DOESNT KNOW HOW TO SAY NO & THEREFORE THEYRE ALL GONNA DIE BC OF IT
haha jk this isn't that type of fic but yeah she actually doessss want to murder luke right now bc hes absolutely clueless haha poor luke
anyways thank you sooooo much for all the love & support! you guys are seriously the best :) sorry it's so short - it will start "rolling" soon though haha ;)
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