Spiderwoman

By ninisnightshade

223K 6K 1.8K

We all know Spiderman as Peter Parker, but what if Peter Parker was never born? Instead, Danielle Parker got... More

Introduction
Part I
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
Part II
22
23
24
25
26
27
ANNIVERSARY
28
29
30
31
32
33
a collection of moments
34
35
36
37
Epilogue

14

5.4K 145 47
By ninisnightshade

We pulled up to Liz's house in Aunt May's car. Ned was wearing a weird hat, but I chose not to comment on it. "Ah, house party in the suburbs. Oh I remember these. Kind of jealous." Aunt May smiled at us.

"It'll be a night to remember." Ned smiled back and I rolled my eyes.

May laughed. "Ned, some hats wear men, you wear that hat."

"That is the point of hats, Aunt May."

"It gives me confidence."

"Hey, maybe we should just go home. You know, Aunt May, there'll be a lot of drunk and possibly high teenagers at this party. You wouldn't want to corrupt your innocent niece now would you?"

She just laughed. "Oh, Dani, I know it's hard with all of the changes you're body's going through. It's flowering now." She joked, entirely out of place.

"Ha ha."

"What with school and your internship, I don't imagine you do much socialising, right?"

"Maybe."

"So, go to the party. Socialise with people. You've been going to this school for what, 2 years? And you haven't been to a single party. Aside from Ned's Screening of the Star Wars Film. Go, have fun, don't get drunk. Or do. Just be safe."

"Yes, OK thank you Aunt May!"

I pushed Ned out of the car and we walked up to Liz's house. I turned to my best friend. "Are you meant to ring the bell at a party?"

To answer my question, the door swung open and we walked in to the smell of cheap beer. "You've got the suit, right?"

"Ned, I'm not doing it. But yes, I always have the suit."

"Can't believe you guys are at this lame party."

We turned around to see Michelle spreading jam on a piece of toast. "You're here too."

"Am I?" She left and I turned to Ned.

"Who has toast at a party?"

Then, Liz walked over. "Hey guys. Cool hat, Ned. I love your outfit, Dani."

"Uh, thanks Liz."

"I'm so happy you guys came. There's pizza and drinks, help yourself."

"By the way, I think I just saw Michelle eating a piece of your toast. I don't know why."

"Well, it is Michelle."

Then, we heard a breaking sound. "Oh, my parents will kill me if any thing's broken. I gotta-"

"Yeah. It's fine. A hostess' job is never done."

"Have fun."

"Thanks."

"Dude, what are you doing? She's here, spider it up."

"Like I told you 1000 times Ned, no. I'm just gonna be myself."

"Dani, no one wants that."

"Wow, thanks that Ned. Bit of career advice, don't become a motivational speaker. You're crap at it. I'm going to find a non alcoholic drink."

I walked off and heard Flash DJ-ing. Who's genius idea was it to give Flash a microphone?

"Parker, what's up? Where's your best friend Spiderwoman? Let me guess, in Canada with your imaginary boyfriend?" He pressed and airhorn sound effect and people around us laughed.

"Excuse me." I walked through the crowd to where Flash was at the DJ booth. I grabbed the microphone.

"You say, 'imaginary boyfriend' Eugene, but maybe I need to remind you that you asked me out in the first week of Freshman Year. So, you really can't talk about me having an imaginary boyfriend."

I pressed the airhorn sound effect and walked out, not even looking back to see Flash's humiliation. I swung up onto the roof and sat on top, looking down at the street, when I saw a giant blue explosion.

"What the-"

I swung down from the roof and across to the source of the blue thing. I also accidentally set off some sprinklers.

I eventually got to where some probably illegal weapons deal was going on. I crawled down the side of the bridge, while the buyer was trying to get a more low-key weapon.

"Man, I wanted something low-key. Why are you trying to upsell me, man?"

"OK, OK, I got what you need, alright?" He went back into the van and I saw that they had loads of alien technology.

This must have been where the ATM robbers got their tech.

"I need something to stick up somebody, I'm not trying to shoot them back in time."

"I got anti-grav climbers." I narrowed my eyes.

"Climbers?" It was at that precise moment, Ned called me and the Star Wars theme tune rang out all over the park.

One of the guys aimed his gun at the buyer. "Mia, send a message to Ned 'I'm busy."

"Message sent."

"Did you set us up?"

The buyer had his hands up. I swung down next to the buyer.

"Woah, dude. If you're gonna shoot at anybody, shoot at me."

"All right." He pointed the gun at me, but I shot a web to cover the weapon and disarmed him.

The guys scrambled to get in the van and I attached a web to the back of it. I was skidding along the road, on my butt at points, while the stupid guy fired stuff at me.

"Mia, are these my strongest webs?"

"Yes."

I shot another web at the other side of the van. The dude kept shooting weapons at me and I tried to dodge, and he eventually fired a hole in the van and dropped the weapon he was holding, which rolled into someone's yard.

"Damn, why are all henchmen so stupid?"

Then, though all of the twists and turms, the back door of the van came off and I fell on the ground. "Guess I'll have to take the shortcut."

I swung through trees and yards to get to where the van was. I ended up walking on top of trash cans and over a parked car.

I saw 2 guys playing ping pong as I ran through their yard. "Hey guys, good game."

I swung through the trees and also scared some small children in a tent and interrupted a pool party who were watching Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

I ran up to the van, finally catching up, but before I could do anything. I was lifted up. I looked up to see some guy in a black wing suit with green glowing eyes.

"You look like the Walmart Brand Falcon."

He flew me above the city and then dropped me in a lake. "Not cool, Walmart Falcon!"

I was swimming to the surface, when something else plunged into the water and carried me to the ground. I looked up, it was Iron Man, or at least an Iron Man suit.

I sat on a rock and looked at the suit. I pulled off my mask.

"And then he swooped down, picked me up and dropped me in a lake. I think it's because I called him a Walmart Brand Falcon. Mia, turn on the heater. You know, it's rude to put a tracking device into a girl's superhero suit, Stark."

"What were you thinking?"

"I'm thinking that I saw an explosion and swung down to check it out, to make sure no one's hurt because that's my job. Then, I see these dudes with alien weapons, and I've already seen first hand what these weapons do. So, I follow them to try and stop them, or at least find out where they operate."

"Steady, Crockett. There are people who handle this kind of thing."

"I'm a superhero, if I see something like that going on, it's my responsibility to check it out and make sure no one's hurt. It's below the Avengers' pay grade, it's above everyone else's. There isn't a middle man. Look, I heard these dudes. They somehow got the weapons from all of your battles. One of the weapons, they got from Sokovia."

"Thank God this place has Wi-Fi or you'd be toast right now. Thank Ganesh while you're at it."

"I was handling it fine on my own."

"You were dropped into a lake!"

"And I was swimming up to the surface. I do know how to swim you know."

"Look, just forget the Walmart falcon guy, please."

"Why?"

"Why? Because I said so! Sorry, talking to a teenager." I assumed he directed the last bit at someone in India.

"You're not my dad."

"Thank God for that, but I am your boss."

"And as my boss, you don't get to control what I do outside work."

"Look, just stay close to the ground. Build up your game helping the little people. Like that lady who bought you the churro. Can't you just be a friendly neighbourhood Spiderwoman?"

"And I am. But I can do more than that. Anyone can give an old lady directions. I'm ready for more."

"No you're not!"

"Yes I am! You took me to fight the Avengers in Germany, you wouldn't have done that if you didn't think I could handle it."

"Look kid, if they wanted to lay you out, they would've."

"No! They wouldn't! I pinned Black Widow to the floor, I beat you in an arm wrestle, twice. I am just as capable as the rest of you."

"Look, if you come across these weapons again, call Happy." I heard the rev of an engine as he spoke.

"Are you driving?"

"You know, it's never too early to start thinking about college. I've got some pull at MIT, not to mention all the opportunities in the work place. End call."

I rolled my eyes and sighed. I walked off, still rolling my eyes when I saw the weapon they had dropped. I picked it up and smirked, when my phone rang. Mia wasn't functioning properly because of the water, so I'd have to fix that another time.

"Hey, Ned. What's up?"

"I was calling to say I don't think you should come back to the party. Flash is saying some pretty bad things about you."

"Yeah, I wasn't planning on coming back anyway. See you tomorrow, dude."

"I guess we're still losers."

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