"Violet, I had to think.. And I really like you. I'm glad you feel the same with me. But I'm afraid. "
"What are you afraid of?"
"You know how my previous relationship ended, it totally ruined me. I don't want anyone cheating on me. I don't want to be with someone who will later exchange me for someone else."
"Clem, I really love you, and I want to be with you. Nothing else would make me happier than being with you. I would never do anything like that to you, I promise."
Clementine thought, then sighed. She looked at Violet, deep into her eyes, then nodded at her. Violet's heart pounded as hard as she could, and a broad smile appeared on her face.
"Clem.. Will you be my girlfriend?"
---
Clementine sat in their apartment, sitting on the couch, her eyes closed. She waited slowly for her girlfriend to return from the meeting that worried her most. But she believed her, after all, it had been three years since they'd been dating.
The last time she spoke to her was in the morning, she remembered how she got up and had the terrible feeling on her chest. As if she knew something bad would happen today. And as she went into the kitchen, she saw her girlfriend sitting on the table, her phone beside her and nervous look on her face. Clementine immediately recognized, that something had happened. She swallowed, and went to sit across her.
"Hi, Clem." Violet greeted, smiling slightly. She looked even more nervous. "I ... I need to talk to you."
"What about, Vi?" Clementine tried to sound normal, but the feeling she had on her chest? It was far worse.
"Fine ..." Violet cleared her neck, and it took her a few seconds to speak again. "Minnie.. She wants to see me tonight, talk to me, i guess."
Clementine's eyes widened, then she lowered her head. She trying to calm herself, not daring to look at Violet, she knew where it was going.
"Is that why you were on the phone almost all night?" Clementine lifted her head and looked at her wide eyes, Violet nodded and lowered her head.
"I heard you laugh, I saw how much fun you had when you were chatting with someone. But I believe you, that's why I let it go." Clementine spoke again, digging her nails into her thighs. "Knowing that you were chatting with your ex-girlfriend, I would probably not let it go."
She heard Violet sigh. She felt something wrong. She knew there was something wrong with Violet. But what could she have done? Minerva was an important person in her life, even though they were not dating anymore.
"I want to see her, Clem. I want to talk to her, solve what I need to solve with her." Violet said, and looked at her girlfriend, who had a fire in her eyes.
Clementine got up from her chair and walked away from her. Her heart pounded at incredible speed, and she took a deep breath. Violet rose too, standing right behind her, feeling her breath on her neck.
"Do you remember what I told you when we got together, Violet?" Clementine turned to her, looking straight into her eyes. She had a serious look on her face, Violet was little bit horrified by that.
"Of course I remember." Violet replied, lowering her gaze.
"If you want to go back to her, tell me now. It will hurt less than know it later." Clementine frowned, holding her breath. She wished she hadn't woken up.
It was enough silence that suddenly surrounded them. Violet would have told her the answer in a second, but it took her a little longer now.
"I love you, Clem. Nothing changes at that." Violet spoke, taking her hand in hers. "I'll be back tonight."
Somehow, Clementine knew their relationship was gone. She sat alone on the couch. Violet was supposed to be home long ago, but she didn't come. She discovered nothing from her, Violet avoided her question, it was clear.
She sighed and looked stupidly into the same place. She imagined Violet talking to Minerva, how she have fun with her, how she laughing with her, and God knew.. What they were doing together.
She had a phone beside her that vibrated every moment. Hundreds of notifications were coming to her, and her body began to shaking. She took a deep breath, and went to see why she had so many notifications.
She looked at the social networks, and the first thing that came out was the new photos of Minerva. The way she was at a club, along with Violet sitting near her. They both looked drunk, smiling and hugging. They looked so happy, they looked so special together.
Clementine gave up slowly. She clicked on her profile, and went to see her story. There were videos where she was talking to Violet.
"Violet Adlon, the most beautiful blonde I have ever known, welcome her!" Minerva spoke, filming drunk Violet, as she rolled her eyes. What exactly did she need to solve with her?
There were other people beside them that Clementine didn't know. Everyone was sitting with them, having fun. Minerva was the center of attention.
And then she received another notification, and another, and another. From Louis, from Brody, from Sophie .. From Violet.
Clementine watched all those videos, and the last two remained. She took a deep breath again, and received another notifications from Louis.
And what did they even write to her? Simple.
Louis: I'm so sorry, Clem
Louis: don't watch those videos, don't watch
Louis: it just hurts you even more, please
Louis: you can't look at it, you just can't
What did Brody write to her? That was far worse.
Brody: honey, are you here?
Brody: I'm so pissed, I'm so fucking pissed
Brody: I can't believe how she could have done this to you
Brody: Clem are you okay, where are you?
And what did Sophie write to her? It would be better if Clem hadn't read it at all.
Sophie: I'm so sorry clementine, you don't even know how disappointed I am
Sophie: you're the biggest sweetheart, you don't deserve this at all
It was simple, the last two videos were what gave her an answer to all of their messages they wrote to her. And that's why she went to see them.
She clicked on another, and her heart broke into a million pieces. And why not? Who would want to see her girlfriend staring at her ex-girlfriend like she wants her so bad? Violet wanted her, and it was visible. And it was true. Why else would Minerva record how they kiss each other and exchange their tongues?
Why else would Minerva record a video as she pulled away from her just to watch Violet frown and start kissing her wildly again?
Violet: clementine
Violet: I don't think i'm coming home today
Violet: and probably not tomorrow
Violet: and not the day after tomorrow
And there it was. Another person who crushed her heart into millions of pieces. She believed her, and Violet did her the same thing, what a boy had done to her in her previous relationship.
Clementine picked up her phone and threw it. She hit him so hard, that the whole phone broke into small pieces. Just like her heart.
She slowly got up from the couch and went to dress. When she was done, she took her shoes and opened the door. It was late evening, and she had nowhere to go. She could go to Louis, she could go to Brody. But Clementine broke, just like before.
Her trust in people broke, she felt disgusted and the only thing she wanted at the moment? Leave, and never come again.
---
Violet woke up and had a crazy headache. She slowly opened her eyes and noticed that she was not in her room. But she knew the room well. It was her ex-girlfriend's room, but what was she doing here?
Violet got a panic attack, her eyes widened and her whole body began to shake. She took a deep breath and looked beside her.
It wasn't Clementine she had beside her. It wasn't her naked girlfriend, it wasn't her darker skin and her curly hair. It was Minerva, it had to be her. No one else had short, red hair.
Violet sat down immediately, looking around the room. On the ground was hers, and Minerva's clothes. She realized, that they.. sleep together. Violet was completely naked, but she still took off the blanket and tried to find her phone. It took less than five minutes to search, because her phone was in her jeans pocket.
Her whole hands were shaking, her whole body. She couldn't even breathe, she couldn't believe it. So many notifications from Louis, from Brody, from Sophie, even from Ruby, almost everyone.. And they were all mad at her.
Violet looked at Minerva, who was still asleep. Therefore, she took her chance and dressed quickly. She escaped as fast as she could, running back home, where Clementine was waiting for her, at least she thought so.
She looked at their messages as she went, and she began to panic even more.
Louis: what you did, violet
Louis: I thought you were far better than this
Violet looked at the two important videos that made her run even more. It was the videos she was kissing Minerva.
Brody: what the fuck is that ?! why?! why did you do that?!
Violet shook her head, unable to believe it. She couldn't believe what she did. She immediately looked at the chat with Clementine. She noticed that she wrote her, and immediately regretted it.
Clementine read her drunken texts, but didn't answer her. She realized that Clementine knew everything.
"CLEMENTINE, where are you ?! Clem, honey .. Are you home ?!"
Did Violet regret that? Yes. Did she realize what a huge mistake she had made? Yes.
Violet searched their entire house. She looked into the bathroom, not finding her there. She looked into their bedroom, not finding her there. She looked outside, looked everywhere possible.. Clementine was nowhere.
She sat down on the couch in defeat, and looked at everything she was doing yesterday. All photos, videos .. All chats from their friends who wrote her. She just lost everything she had. She lost Clementine, lost her friends, had nothing at all.
Violet began to cry hysterically. She began to sob and couldn't catch her breath. She couldn't breathe, couldn't do anything at all.
She didn't know where Clementine was, she hoped she was with Louis or the others, she hoped Clementine was all right.
Her phone began to ring, someone called her. Violet looked immediately, and when she saw Minerva calling her, she just cried even more. To destroy such a beautiful relationship just ... because of Minerva, who was only here for a fucking three days. She was with Clementine for three years, and now she ruined it all.
Two hours passed, and Violet lay on the couch. She was crying, but not as much as before. She was just wondering, and she wished that it never happened. She wished instead to be home with her girlfriend that day, cuddling together and watching a movie. Where they would cook something good together and spend time together. And she threw it away because of Minerva who just wanted to sleep with her, who just wanted to enjoy the three days she was supposed to be here.
Another hour passed, and Violet noticed a broken phone that was all over the ground. As she walked closer, she noticed that it was Clementine's phone. Violet sighed. She had to break it.
She picked up broken pieces of the phone and threw them away. Her phone could not be repaired, it was all destroyed. Violet couldn't call her, so she took a deep breath and decided to call Louis.
She was holding the phone close to her ear, and when she heard Louis, she asked directly what she was most interested in.
"Louis, is Clem-" Her grumpy voice, which was cut off immediately.
"Come here, we won't talk to you over the fucking phone." She heard Brody, and when Brody was pissed.. It was quickly recognizable. She turned it off immediately, and Violet sighed. She went right into the car and drive to Louis place.
She knew they would want to kill her. But she had to know where Clementine was and if she was okay. That's why she knocked on the door and almost got a blow to her face.
"Brody, calm down!" Marlon immediately grabbed her, Brody defended herself, then gave up. She couldn't look at Violet anymore.
Louis stood near her, a frown expression and crossed hands. Violet saw how disappointed he was.
"Can you tell me why you were with Minerva? Can you tell me why you weren't home with Clem?! What the fuck did you think of, you are totally-"Louis was as angry as Brody. If it hadn't been for Sophie who had put her hand on his shoulder, he would have yelled even more.
Violet understood them all. She knew how much she had disappointed them. She knew how disappointed Clementine was. She loved them all, but she needed only one thing to know.
"Please, just tell me. If she's here, she ... She's not home." Violet said quietly, her gaze down. She knew how much Brody wanted to kill her. Marlon had to hold her all the time.
"No, she didn't come to either of us. We called her, but it threw us into the voicemail. I swear to God Violet, if she did something to herself..." Brody had an even more angry expression.
"Her phone.. She smashed it, it was ... totally ruined." Violet sighed and began to panic. "I have to find her, she .. she-"
"Clementine was so happy, Violet. How could you do that? Minnie's my sister, but you.. I just can't believe it." Sophie shook her head in disappointment, and walked past her. "We have to find her, she was hurt once, and you know it well, Violet. If we don't find her.. I don't even want to think about it."
So everyone was looking for her. Mitch and Sophie, Brody with Marlon, Louis, Violet .. All of them. Omar, Ruby who nearly killed her if all the boys didn't keep her away.. Violet would have ended up probably in the hospital.
Everyone was looking for her, and no one stopped. It was afternoon, and there was no sign of her. Nobody found anything. It was evening, and everyone was desperate, stressed.
Violet had no choice but to call her mother. She knew nothing about her daughter. Violet couldn't tell her what had happened, or she would have voluntarily killed her. She also called Kenny, who Clem wasn't with. And so she had the last person to call, Lee ... who was forced to call the police. There was nothing else left, Clementine as if she had completely disappeared.
"It's your fault! It's your fucking mistake! I never want to see you again, you'll end up in hell for that, Violet! Because of you.. Maybe Clementine is dead, you understand? Maybe she's dead, because of YOU!"
And Brody was right, everyone knew it. Violet knew she was right. Because of her, Clementine could take her life for real. When Violet saw her for the first time, she noticed how much she doesn't care about everything around her. She didn't care where she would end up, she doesn't care if she died. Violet was the one who helped her change her attitude. But now? Violet knew she had destroyed her. She knew that Clementine was walking around town alone, without food, without money..
Violet had only one choice..
Pack up and go look for her alone. Because what else did she have? She lost everything she had. She lost her beloved person, with whom she planned to spend her life. There was nothing else that held her.
Because she only had her Clementine, she only had her..
---
Two years later
It has been two years since Violet left the others and went looking for her lost girlfriend. She didn't believe she was dead. Clementine must have been somewhere. Somewhere in the world. Alone, and Violet couldn't accept it.
So much she missed Clementine. She so much wished it never happened. It would have been five years since they were together.. Not for the incident that happened.
Violet practically became homeless. The only place she slept was her car. She didn't care, but she couldn't live without Clementine. And she was determined to keep looking for her until she found her.
And if she doesn't find her.. Then there's no one for her anyway. She no longer wanted life, she wanted her curly hairy girl back, with the most beautiful eyes. No one could replace Clementine.
When the others found out that Violet went looking for her all by herself.. They were willing to forgive her. But Violet didn't know that, because the only thing she cared about, was just her lost girlfriend.
Violet walked down a long alley full of people. Because she didn't have much money, she couldn't afford to have a car. That's why she walked around the world, and she made herself much thinner than she already was. She had large circles under her eyes, tired eyes. Her body was tired and exhausted, but what else could she do?
Every time she walked past people, she looked at them. Every girl with curly hair, every girl with dark skin.. But nobody had Clementine's beautiful, golden eyes. Violet desperately wanted to see that eyes. She needed to desperately see her, and hold her in her arms. She cried every day, cried every night, and was forced to look at the stars alone.
Violet slowly began to hallucinate. She dreamed of her almost every day. She felt that she could see her in the distance, and she ran after her. But then she found out that no one was there. She know that she was slowly becoming crazy.
Violet doesn't even know how many cities she has visited. She asked people if they had seen her, showed them her photo. But no one saw her, and Violet was getting more and more desperate.
She sighed and sat on the ground, leaning against a nearby wall. She had her backpack with her, clothes hanging on her. Everything was too big for her. Her hair was long, too, but she didn't care. It wasn't something she want taking care of right now.
She rubbed her face, leaving her eyes closed for a moment. She was tired, really tired. She slept on the ground for days, on the grass, or somewhere in an empty street, quietly in the park. Slowly she had no money, slowly she didn't even have the strength. She was beginning to think she would give up and go kill herself. Maybe Clementine is really dead, and in heaven they have the chance to finally see each other, right?
But who knows? Maybe Violet ends up in hell because of what she did. Where would she suffer for what she did to her. All this time, and her pain never ends.
Next to her was a group of young girls, among them was a tall boy, with a red beanie. They were students. The boy was talking to a brown-haired girl with dark skin. But that wasn't Clementine, Violet would have known. There was another girl with glasses, holding a bag in her hands, looking down. She looked too shy and incompetent. Violet saw a bit of herself in her.
"Gabe, you know what she is. She refused you several times, you don't have a chance." The girl with brown-haired hair shook her head, and he shrugged. Violet wondered who the girl was talking about. But she was too tired to find out, so she stayed seated and watched them go away. Her eyes closed, and she was unable to open them. She stayed there all day.
The next day Violet woke up and hugged herself. She sighed again, looking at the world around her. She had no strength to continue her journey, she had no strength at all. She slowly gave up. And then she saw the students again.
She looked at them and listened to everything they were talking about. They waited again to pass, and she had nothing more interesting to do anyway.
"I told you, idiot." The brown-haired girl rolled her eyes and looked at him again. "Just leave her alone, you can see that you're starting to bother her. Besides, she's far older than you, she is definitely looking for someone with a brain."
"Shut up, Mari! I know I can do it. Tomorrow I will invite her somewhere, and you will see she will say yes!" The boy rejoiced, and she rolled her eyes again.
How often she rolled her eyes reminded her of the times with Louis. Violet smiled, she missed the man. She was missing them all, but she was all alone now, had nothing at all.
"You should stop bothering her, she said she didn't want any relationship." The girl with the glasses said for the first time. Violet raised her head and watched them again. If only they were talking about her lost girlfriend..
"You'll see both of you! I'll do it tomorrow." The boy frowned, and they began to walk to the other side again.
Violet remembered.. The way she smiled beautifully. How she could make Violet happy and how she could make her smile. How she could make her laugh. She missed her sweet lips, which she loved so much to taste. Her naked body, that warmed her in bed. Her voice, which she could listen all day. All of this.. For her, it became more and more painful.
She was simply dying, she feel it. Her body was exhausted, as was her mental side. She just couldn't handle it anymore. She was unable to drink or eat anymore. She just sat in the same place, waiting for her last breath.
But then .. She heard them again, the same students. She saw the same boy who smiled like a small child. Beside him was the same girl named Mari, who was desperate to rolled her eyes at how stupid he looked right now. Violet felt that she was seeing Louis and herself. The stupid grin she missed so much. The stupid, dreaded boy she missed so much.
"She gave you her own number, or was you bothering her for so much that she gave it to you?" She raised one eyebrow at the boy, and he frowned again.
"She gave it to me! He scratched the back of his neck. "I think I'll invite her to the good restaurant with the good pizzas."
Violet was sick at the thought of eating, it had been a few days since she hadn't eaten. And it had been a few days since she had barely been drinking.
The girl shook her head, and they went away again. Violet stopped paying attention, but when she heard what the girl said, her eyes widened.
"Poor Clementine."
Violet was enough to get up. She was seriously exhausted. When she got up, her eyes were black, almost unable to walk. But if she loses them out of sight, she'll never know if it's the Clementine she knew.
The group of students were still talking, and Violet followed them slowly. She left her backpack and just followed them. Her whole body was shaking, feeling like it would break up at any moment. But she was determined to continue. If it's not her, then she doesn't care what happens to her.
"She has very nice, curly hair. I must admit that I am quite envious of them. Right, Sarah?" The brunette turned to the girl, and Violet was even more determined to see the mysterious Clementine they had talked about so much.
"She's so beautiful!" Gabe said, and Violet frowned at him. If he was talking about her girlfriend.. She planned to kill him later.
"Fine, Gabe. You are drooling, and it's disgusting." Brunette suddenly stopped in front of the shop. "Enjoy another rejection, come Sarah."
Both girls entered the store, along with Gabe, who looked pretty proud. Violet followed immediately, though she was terribly slow. She felt like she would faint at any moment. But that didn't stop her, not yet.
"H-hi, Clementine!" Gabe said, Violet was busy breathing, leaning against the door frame, her head down, eyes closed.
"Hey, and I told you that I'm not going anywhere with you, Gabe."
Violet, as if an electric shock had passed through her body. The voice.. The voice she wanted to hear for so long.
"Come on! I'll buy us a pizza, and then we can watch a movie! You said you like movies."
Clementine chuckled, her beautiful laughter and the sounds she made. Violet moved forward with all her strength, opened her eyes and looked up. Gabe prevented her from looking at her, so she pushed him away with all her strenght.
"Hey, what are you doing?!" He was angry, but Violet ignored him. Right now, she was busy discovering the girl in front of her.
Darker skin, stronger figure .. curly hair, longer than she had before. And those eyes .. those golden eyes she wanted to see so much. And right now, they looked at her with shock.
Violet smiled, smiling, not even realizing that tears were running down her face. She stood there, crying, unable to believe it. She really found her, she really found her Clementine. The most beautiful girl she could ever meet.
"Vi .. Violet? Is that you? Oh my god.."
Clementine walked closer to her, still shocked to see Violet after two years. She hadn't expected to see her again. But she was here right now. And she looked ... horrible. Her clothes hung on her, she was dirty and very thin. Her beautiful blond hair was now dirty and long, tangled. Her beautiful green eyes she loved to look at.. Suddenly, they were so tired and exhausted. And.. broken.
"I thought I'd never see you again. I thought you were dead. I ... I thought-" Violet tried to talk, but she sobbed so much she couldn't even catch her breath. Clementine hugged her immediately and gently, Violet immediately hugged her too.
"Shh, you look so exhausted. Come on, we can't be here." Clementine spoke softly, stroking her back, then carefully took her hand. She felt that just touching her would hurt her.
Violet was wiping tears from her face, but they kept running. She couldn't believe it, she found her. And she really feels her hand on her. It's real.
Clementine probably took her to her apartment. It was small, but cozy. And it wasn't far from where she worked. Clementine let her sit on the couch.
"Wait here." She said to her and left. Violet wiped her tears again and stopped crying. She looked around, admiring how cozy it looked at her home.
"Drink and eat." Clementine came again, along with the food and drink she had laid on the table. "I have to go back to work. But I'll be back in two hours. Stay here and rest when I get back. We'll talk later, okay?" She had a caring look on her face, and put a few hair away from Violet's face.
Violet nodded at her and looked at what she had brought. Clementine went back to work, slamming the door. Violet took a deep breath and smiled. She couldn't believe it, but it was true. It was the Clementine she knew. It was the Clementine she loved so much.
But right now she had to focus on not destroying anything between them again. Right now she had to show her how much she was sorry and how much she wanted her back. Right now.. She wished Clementine wouldn't leave her.
Violet hadn't eaten anything good for a long time, and the cold lemon water had really helped her. But she was still very tired, so she did as Clementine told her. She lay down on a comfortable couch, and fell asleep almost immediately.
If Clementine didn't love her anymore.. She understood, but she hoped that the brunette had some feelings for her. She really wished she could have her back. Although she looked terrible, but who would wonder? She spent the whole two years of her life searching for her lost girlfriend.
She wondered how her friends would react if they saw what she looked like and what she had been doing for two years. They probably didn't think she ended up homeless, and that she almost died.
She hoped she could bring things back to normal. She hoped to win back her friends and girlfriend. Because if not ... She had nowhere to go. And then she didn't want to live anymore.
Violet slept for more than two hours, actually slept all day. She woke up late in the evening when she noticed that she had a comfortable blanket on her and a television was on. She noticed Clementine sitting near her, looking tired.
She got up slowly, attracting the attention of the brunette, who suddenly didn't look tired. Violet had slept on something soft after a long time and was perhaps even more tired than she had been before.
"Did I sleep all day? I'm sorry, you could woken me up." Violet's voice was almost barely audible.
"No, you look terribly exhausted and tired." Clementine shook her head, looking at her. "How are you feeling, better?"
Violet looked into her beautiful eyes, then nodded. Clementine had a small smile on her face that disappeared after a moment. "We need to talk, Violet. Why you look so bad, what ... what happened?"
Violet took a deep breath, and had to think carefully about what she chose as words. She didn't want to say something that might upset her, but she didn't want to lie to her either.
"I've been looking for you for two years. It ended up being ... well, that I became homeless." Violet lowered her head. She could imagine how shocked Clementine was now. "I know how much I messed up, and I'm so sorry, Clem. I ... Everybody got mad at me, Brody almost killed me, Ruby almost killed me. I disappointed Louis and Sophie, disappointing everyone. We were all looking for you that day, into the night. When I didn't find you, I started crying and ... I just packed up and went looking for you."
It was silent, Clementine was trying to absorb what Violet had told her. And then she sat more comfortably on the couch. Clementine wasn't even able to speak, Violet looked up to see her trying to keep her tears. Clementine closed her eyes and took a deep breath. After a while she got up from the couch and turned back on her. Violet saw that she was wiping tears.
"Clem, I-"
"Don't say anything, wait here. I prepare the bath."
Violet nodded at her, watching her walk away again. She didn't want to upset her, so she tried to do what she wanted. Violet swallowed, and got up from the couch. She went to look out the window, the living city. It was a nice sight, she always preferred apartments with such a view.
She heard footsteps behind her, so she turned to see Clementine standing close to her, who was watching Violet how she look out the window, a soft smile on her face appeared.
"Come, the bath is ready." She said simply, and Violet followed her.
The two stood in the bathroom, and Violet sighed. A hot tub would really come in handy, but see her body? She was not interested in that. She stripped off her sweater and was in a shirt that revealed her skinny hands. She couldn't even look at herself, she just couldn't.
"Vi." She could hear the soft voice of Clem coming up from behind her, running her hand over Violet thin hand."You're so thin, far more than you were.."
"I know." Violet said, looking at the floor. She didn't want to see her body. She didn't even know if she wanted Clementine to see her body.
She heard Clementine sigh and step back a little further from her. Violet wanted to turn, but she stopped her. She obeyed her, waiting.
"I see you have trouble undressing. But you don't have to be ashamed or worried in front of me, Vi. " Clem spoke softly. "And it's not just for me, I see you don't want to undress, because you don't want to look at yourself."
Violet was still looking at the floor as she felt Clementine's hand catching hers.
"Look at me." Clementine said, and Violet turned on her. Clementine stood in her underwear and sports bra only. Her body was one of the things she really missed. But she knew Clementine had undressed for another reason.
"I'll help you undress, and I'll help you wash. I want to ... I want to help you, but if you mind- "
"It's all right, Clem. You can stay."
Clementine nodded at her with a smile. She carefully walked closer to her again, watching Violet's expression. She knew she was uncomfortable. But she had nothing to worry about. After all, Clementine had seen her body many times.
Violet stared into her eyes all the time she was undressing in front of her. When she was completely naked, she sighed, her heart pounding. She knew how thin she was, and it disgusted her.
Clementine noticed it and walked closer to her. Their bodies were only a few millimeters apart, and their faces too. Clementine put her hand on her cheek and stroked her gently. Violet's hair wasn't that long, but she knew she would want to cut it. That's why Clementine enjoyed every moment she could see her with a little longer hair.
Clementine always loved her hair. She loved how soft they were, she loved playing with them. The way they spent time together on the couch, when Violet was lying with her head on Clementine's lap, who was playing with her hair.. They were the best memories that always warmed her heart.
"You'll never disgust me, I've always loved you the way you are, Violet." Clementine whispered softly, and Violet watched her, looking deeply into her golden eyes. "I want to help you, and after the bath, I'll do something good to eat. We'll eat and go to sleep, okay?"
"Okay, Clem."
Clementine nodded at her and went to take off the rest. Violet tried to not look at her, but Clementine just seemed that she did not mind. Even so, she didn't look at her, waiting for her to go into the tub together.
"Come on, I want to wash your hair." Clementine said, and she and Violet went to the hot tub. Violet immediately closed her eyes and began to relax. The hot water really helped her relax. She sighed loudly, feeling Clementine's body, that was pressed on her naked back. Violet swallowed, not expecting to be seriously in the bath with her.
"Do I make you uncomfortable?" Clementine asked.
"N-no, not at all. I just .. After all, go to the tub, with you .. I'm just really glad." Violet replied, looking at the water she had all around. She looked at Clementine's legs, which was next to her body.
"Okay, Vi. Can I wash your hair?" She asked carefully, waiting for the blonde to answer. She answered her by nodding.
Clementine soaked her hair, and then put a shampoo in her hand to massage it into the blonde hair. Violet closed her eyes and relaxed again. That was really something that forced her to erase the bad thoughts for a moment and just enjoy that one, wonderful moment.
"I really miss you, Clem." Violet spoke quietly, but Clementine heard her anyway. "I thought of you every day, if it weren't for you.. I guess I wouldn't be here anymore."
"Don't say that." Clementine shook her head. "Close your eyes for a moment."
Violet nodded, though her eyes were closed long ago. Clementine washed her head completely, then gently stroking her naked bare hands.
"I missed you too. You and the others.." Clementine said quietly, and Violet turned to her. So that she could look into her eyes again. "I was really angry, Violet. I had to leave, I didn't let anyone know, nor did Lee know anything, I contacted him after a month."
Clementine ran her fingers through her still dry hair and looked at Violet's cracked lips. "But I want to know something."
Violet swallowed, straightening her body. She knew she would want to talk about it. She just didn't expect to talk about it now.
"I saw the videos, Violet." She said seriously, and also a little angry. "I saw you kissing. Did you .. sleep with her?"
Violet tore her eye contact away and lowered her head. She knew she would want to know. But she wasn't ready to just say it, so she decided to just nod.
"When.. I found out what I did, I .. I ran away, I went home right away. But you weren't there anymore. I cried, Mi-Minerva called me, but I didn't answer. She didn't care that my whole life had been destroyed, but it doesn't matter. Then I saw your broken phone. I was worried about you, so I called Louis, and then.. We went looking for you."
Clementine sighed and shifted slightly, Violet looked at her and noticed her angry expression.
"I'm really sorry, Clem. I'd never do anything like that again. I ... I love you, I've never stopped." Violet wanted to cry again, seriously regretting what she had done. "I'm so sorry, I disappointed everyone, I upset you all. I'm really sorry."
"It's.. okay.."
Clementine cut her off, and Violet widened her eyes.
"I forgive you, though it is not easy for me to say." Clementine sighed. "But you've been looking for me for two years. You left everything to find me. I forgive you, Violet."
Violet watched her intently, not looking away from her. She felt the water getting slightly cold, but she ignored it.
"Would it be possible that ... that you would gave me a second chance.. to fix it all?" Violet asked carefully.
Clementine bit her lower lip. "I trusted you once, and it didn't go well. It took me two years to lift my head and continue. I don't want to fall again." She rubbed her face, watching Violet's sad expression.
"I understand, Clem. But I'd never do anything like that again. I don't want anyone else, I don't want Minerva. It was a stupid mistake that made me lose everything. If I really want something, it's just you, Clem. I don't want to live without you."
Clementine blinked several times, listened to her every word and watched her expression. She saw that she meant it and regretted what she had done. So she sighed, raising her chin with her hand, to make her look at her.
"I need to think about it, Violet. Give me a few days. And then we'll talk again."
---
Two weeks have passed,
Violet was at the hotel where she sat by the window all day looking at the vibrant, colorful city or the stars that showed up in the evening. Clementine came to her every day to check on her. She found out how she was and what she was doing all day. Violet did nothing but sit by the window, waiting for her to know what was going to happen with their relationship.
Violet lost everything she had. The only hope for her life was Clementine, only she could pick her up and start her new chapter in life. But she didn't want to enter a new chapter without her. She wanted the chapter to be with her. She wanted them to be together again. That was all Violet wanted.
The others already knew what she had been doing all these two years. They discovered what had happened to Violet and also found that she had found Clementine. After two years of searching, she finally found her. She talked to Louis like in the old days. She could laugh and roll her eyes at his stupid jokes. She talked to Brody when they talked frankly about what had happened. Ruby, Sophie .. Everybody forgave her.
It meant her friends were here again for her, everyone. It meant she could go back.. It meant she wasn't alone. But Violet didn't want to come back alone.
"Violet, are you okay?" Clementine's voice tore her from her mind, watching her with those golden eyes looking for any hint of pain. "You look pale, did you eat, drink?"
"I forgot." Violet said ashamed, scratching her right hand. Both sat on the couch, side by side. She heard Clementine sigh, and Violet watched her with her tired eyes.
"You have to eat and drink, stop ignoring it, Violet." She shook her head, frowning at her. "If you go on like this, you'll end up in the hospital."
There was a moment of silence, both of them thinking. But the silence was pleasant, they could hear the sounds of cars and nightlife that Violet liked so much.
"All day looking out the window, sitting. You do nothing else."
"And what should I do, Clem?" Violet shrugged. "I just want to know how it will be with us. I'm just waiting. I don't want to do anything else."
Violet slowly lost her hope. It had been two weeks, and she still had no answer. Maybe Clementine didn't really like her anymore. Maybe she was disgusted by her.
"If you don't want me anymore, just tell me, Clem."
"It's not like that, I ... I want you." Clementine said quickly. "I was wondering about all this. About what happened, about how you were looking for me. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry you had to live like that, Violet. I know it's because of me.." She takes a deep breath and hides her face with her hands.
Violet leaned over and removed her hands from her face. Clementine was sad, looking at Violet's hand on her knee.
"It's my fault, don't blame yourself. What I did can't be just forgiven. But don't blame yourself, it was my decision. I packed up and went looking for you, I wanted to. I don't care how I ended up, I care that I finally found you, Clem. It was worth it."
"I've already forgiven you, Vi. And I'm sorry I haven't told you before, but.." Clementine looked into her green eyes, only a few millimeters apart. "I still want you, and I still love you. I'm sorry what you had to go through for me. When I saw you at the store, I was barely able to hold back tears. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't think of anything else. I've seen you all this time. Your pale face, your ruined eyes .. I .. I deserve a fist in my face, you don't deserve too much to suffer- "
Violet took her chances and grabbed her face. Seeing Clementine tears run down her face, she wiped them and stopped her from speaking by kissing her lips. It was a gentle and careful kiss. It allowed her to break away at any time, but Clementine kissed her deeper. She kissed her more, and her tears continued to flow. It was a kiss full of pain and love.
Both of them kissed for long time, both of them were not interested in breaking away. Clementine's lips were the same as before, sweet and soft. Violet's lips were cracked, destroyed. But she didn't care, they both enjoyed their kiss who sent them an electric shock all over their body, the butterfy feeling in their belly. Which made their hearts pound at fast speed.
It was exactly what both of them needed. Finding their way to each other again, their love did not end. On the contrary, it became even stronger and unbreakable. It was no longer possible for anyone to get in their way. Violet had Clementine back, and Clementine had Violet back. The only thing that mattered.
Clementine broke off gently, and began to sob. She stroked Violet's thin hands which she has on both sides of her cheeks.
"I'm sorry I didn't talk to you before, I felt terrible about all this." Clementine spoke between sobbing. "I never stopped loving you. And I be happy to be your girlfriend again, Violet. I want us together, forever."
"I'll never leave you again, Clementine. I will never hurt you again, I will protect you with my whole life, I am dead without you, I can't be without you and I don't want to. Nobody made me as happy as you. I love you, you don't even know how much."
---
And so it happened. They were together again, and Violet began to live with Clementine in her apartment, her friends visited them and solved all the questions together. There was screaming, there were tears, hugging and joy. Everything was resolved, and Violet could finally breathe normally.
After two years, she had her girlfriend back, along with her friends and the life she had lost in the meantime. She had everything back, and she made sure, that she didn't make the same mistake again.
A few months passed, and Violet became healthy, began to work on herself, and noticed the need to cut her hair. That's why she was sitting in a chair waiting for Clementine, who was frowning all the time. Violet had beautiful, blond hair. But she wanted her short haircut back.
"Come on, Clem. If you don't do it, I will and it will turn out badly." Violet crossed her arms, watching her girlfriend play with her hair.
"Fine, fine ..." Clementine sighed and began cutting her hair. Violet closed her eyes and waited for her to finally tell her she was done.
It took a few minutes, and Clementine reached for her head, adjusted her short hair, and had a smile on her face. Violet immediately got up and went to look in the mirror, seeing that she looked normal, she sigh with relief.
"I will miss your long hair, but I missed this Violet with short hair." Clementine said, hugging her from behind, putting her head on her shoulder, looking at her in the mirror. "The inaccessible, always grumpy and cute Violet who always stole my food."
"High school memories, Clem?" Violet chuckled, turning to her. Clem raised her head and looked deep into her eyes, and then at her lips.
"I like to remember.. The way we met, how cute you looked when I tutored you, and you were so grumpy, angry. You were like a kitten." Clementine smiled. "I'm glad I stole you for myself."
"I'm glad too, Clem." Violet put her hand on her cheeks. "Can I kiss you?"
"You can kiss me whenever you want, Vi. Just not in front of my mom." She shook her head, and Violet rolled her eyes. "It was enough in high school, when she saw you kiss me in front of her. I remember your shocked expression when you realized she was my mom. I couldn't stop laughing all day."
"Yeah, it was funny. Until she wanted to kill us both, and relocate you to another school. I thought.. Violet frowned. "That I will never see you again."
"You have me right in front of you, you live with me. You live with me and no other person will separate us, not even my mom, Vi."
"I love you Clem, I love you so much."
"I love you too, Vi."
So another of their stories ended. Violet kissed her deeply and didn't allow her to break away, her new chapter began, along with Clementine she planned to marry, and to have with her the most beautiful family she secretly wanted.
She was happy, she was one of the happiest people in the world. She had what she needed. She had what was good for her life.
She had everything.