+
So let's do a bit of a recap here.
I'm walking down the hall, trialing behind Shikamaru and Naruto. We're not doing anything too special—just getting ready to taunt one of their friends with food they can't have. Only for me to realize that, hey, there's someone in a private hospital room when they really should not be. And it's not just anyone's hospital room. Upon closer examination, I was just thrilled to realize that it was Rock Lee's hospital room.
This guy wasn't here to drop of some flowers and pay a friendly visit either. No—my strong sense of intuition didn't have to tell me that. The sand curling over Lee's sleeping body and moving to wrap around his neck was plenty of a telltale sign.
So I did just what any logical human being would do in that situation.
I socked him in the jaw.
"Ow!"
I looked back over my shoulder, my hands clutching the front of the assholes clothes who thought they could just come into Lee's room and attempt to fucking murder him.
Shikamaru winced, bending back on his thighs in a really weird stance. Noticing my staring, he gave a little grunt, gesturing to his legs. "Wanna let the guy up? And try not to hit him while you're at it. Anything he feels, I feel too."
I looked down, finally getting a good look at the guy who had the fucking audacity to try and murder someone while they laid in a hospital bed. Not to mention while they were out cold and completely defensive.
He looked at me in confusion, but it wasn't as though he was only confused. He seemed almost careless that he was hit, but also...angry at the same time? It was a little hard to gauge what this guy was feeling. Mostly because I'd never been in tune with emotions to begin with, but also because this guy was just...there. He didn't say anything. He didn't make an expression. The only thing that gave away any sort of emotion was his light colored, sea foam green eyes.
My eyes widened, it clicking into place.
This was that freaky sand dude with the gourd! He was the one giving me all those scary ass vibes during the preliminary rounds, and was the other team that arrived at the tower before mine did. I remembered how much this dude freaked me out, and it took a lot to get me freaked out.
"Kohana." Said Shikamaru again, trying to get me to release the guy. "Let me up, will you?"
I tightened my grip on his clothes and grit my teeth, maintaining eye contact with him. He didn't make any expression, red hair flopped back as I tipped him toward the ground. I growled under my breath, knuckles turning white.
I didn't like this guy one bit.
"Fine."
I let go of his clothes and backed up a few paces, not moving my gaze. He was still trapped in Shikamaru's shadow possession Jutsu, but I was nervous about him doing something unexpected and attacking us. I wasn't sure why he was in Lee's room trying to kill him. But I wasn't about to give him the chance to attack me or the others either.
"What the hell were you trying to pull?!" Snapped Naruto, glaring the sand Shinobi. "Wasn't what you did to bushy brows during the preliminaries enough?"
I looked over to Naruto in shock. "You mean...he's the one who..?"
"Yeah." Said Shikamaru, also glaring at the guy. "Not sure if you heard, but this guy didn't stop at knocking Lee out during their match. No—he tried to completely crush him without batting an eye. He tried to crush him, after already destroying Lee's left arm and leg with his sand."
My lips parted in shock.
So this was the sand shinobi Sakura had told me about.
I knew something was up, all the way back to when I had seen him at the tower.
I knew it.
"He's right." The red haired shinobi spoke up, his voice coming out deep and raspy. "I was trying to kill him."
"But...why?" I furrowed my brows, sickening feeling settling in my stomach at how nonchalant he was about committing murder against someone who really, had done nothing wrong.
"It's simple really." He said. "I want to kill him...just to kill him."
"What?!" Shrieked Naruto, pointing in his direction. "What the heck are you saying?!"
"I understand wanting to pick a fight, trust me." I spoke up, gesturing to myself. He looked away from Naruto, meeting my gaze. "But what do you get out of attempting to harm a person who is utterly defenseless? If you're wanting entertainment by fighting someone...then that's going to get you no where—"
"You don't understand. It's not about entertainment."
I furrowed my brows in confusion, but didn't say anything more.
Shikamaru scoffed. "You really weren't raised right, were you? You're so self centered."
"If you try to interfere with me, I'll kill you too." He said, still as nonchalant as ever—not to mention completely disregarding what Shikamaru had said. He maintained eye contact with me, but I couldn't understand why. I didn't want him to look at me.
"Hey!" Naruto shook his fist. "You can't kill me! I'd take you on right now—!"
"Would you shut the hell up!" I shot Naruto a glare over my shoulder. "Just shut up already! This guy...there's obviously something wrong with him. Don't go around making these ridiculous threats."
"Exactly." Shikamaru put his arm up, holding Naruto back so he couldn't make any hasty movements. "This guy has monster strength. We can't risk tempting that."
"Monster, huh?" Naruto grinned, not taking the sand shinobi seriously. "That's too bad, since I've got a real monster inside me. I won't lose to someone like him."
"I have one as well..." he paused, taking a breath. "I was born a monster. The sand spirit, Shukaku, was sealed inside me before my birth. My mother's life was sacrificed at the moment I came into this world. The monster was sealed inside me to be the Sands weapon. I was to protect and fight for the village. Give my life for their ultimate defense and attack. At first... when I learned why my mother died...I thought that to be love."
"That was...until the incident..." he chuckled, a dark aura surrounding him.
The killing intent swirled with pure sense of evil was soul crushing. I found it hard to breath under the total sense of death. Whatever this guy had been through had to have totally fucked him up. I thought I had a messed up childhood, but this guy... he had been through worse than I had. Having your own parents, the people who were supposed to love and protect you, seal a monster inside of you? Having them seal your fate without even getting the choice?
It was... repulsive.
I couldn't totally grasp what he meant by a monster. What this monster could be. I wasn't sure a monster even existed. What would be sealed inside a person to be used a weapon and nothing else? What was a weapon, but also considered a monster?
I couldn't think of anything.
"Ever since I had turned six, my father tried to assassinate me. And I have lost count how many times he has tried."
"What sort of parent does that?" I murmured quietly, the sickening feeling I had earlier returning tenfold.
"To them, I am a relic of the past they simply want to forget." Gaara continued. "So then came the question of my purpose. Why was I to exist? What was the point of my life? When I first asked that question, I had no answer."
He took another breath.
"But while I continue to live, I need a reason. Otherwise... I might as well be dead."
Shikamaru clenched his jaw, not understanding. "What is he talking about?!"
I swallowed hard, the sudden urge to puke bubbling in my stomach.
I understood.
Maybe not to the depth he felt. Maybe not to the point where my own father had tried to murder me. But... but I understood the desperate attempt to find your purpose. The desperate attempt to understand why you existed, when it seemed like you were no more than a burden to others. When you were no more than a nuisance. A disgusting delinquent that didn't even belong in the village.
"So, I decided I existed to kill all other humans than myself. Living in constant fear when I know I may be assassinated... I finally found my inner peace. By killing those who sought to kill me, I found my reason for existence."
The way he spoke, it was so simple. He sounded so soulless, so full of hate and resent, I couldn't help but feel pity.
"I live only to love myself and to fight for myself. As long as there is people out there for me to kill, I can feel alive." He said. "I will not cease to exist."
I frowned.
I understood.
"Now," He roared, sand shooting up from the gourd he held on his back. "Help me feel alive!"
I moved to draw my tanto, but I knew that would be meaningless against his attack. That sand would break my tanto, before eventually breaking my body along with it. I didn't think Naruto, as gutsy as he was, could take this on. And I had no idea how he was able to manipulate the sand even under Shikamaru's shadow possession.
If he got ahold of us, we were finished.
"Thats enough!"
The sand stopped in midair at the voice. It hung right above us in a giant clump, grains of sand dripping down and falling to the floor. I was staring straight at something that could have totally annihilated me, and I didn't have the power to do anything. I didn't have the power to save myself or anyone else around me.
If that person hadn't said anything...
"Save it for the matches tomorrow."
I looked over to the door, blinking at the sight of a man who looked like an older version of Lee. In fact, I think he was the guy who stood by Momo Sensei during the preliminary rounds. He had the signature bowl cut like lee, along with the orange leg warmers and green jumpsuit.
Was this his dad or something? Or was he just Lee's Sensei.
I had no clue, but I was extremely, extremely, grateful for him stepping in. Like I said before, I had no way of stopping this guy from killing us. We were... we were like his fucking prey. The thought made me sick.
The sand Shinobi screamed in agony, tangling his fingers into his red hair. He curled over and heaved as though he was in pain, but I didn't understand what he would be feeling pain from. No one had attacked him. It didn't look like he was bleeding at all.
I was nothing short of confused right now.
"I'll kill you..." he trudged past us and Lee's dad/Sensei, before disappearing around the corner, leaving behind a light trail of sand. "I'll kill... all of you."
I grimaced.
I was just glad I wasn't going up against that guy.
Good luck, Sasuke.
I got almost no sleep that night. It wasn't out of nervousness for what was to come the next day, since I wasn't afraid of the outcome for the matches. I was pretty psyched about that actually.
The thing that continuously plagued my thoughts was how defenseless I was against that guy. I couldn't do anything. I couldn't fight back. I had no other option but to run, and even then I didn't like the idea of doing nothing other than running away. I wasn't a coward anymore, right? Or at least, I was trying not to be a coward. Running away from a guy like that... it reeked of cowardice.
How weak I was against him plagued my thoughts as I got dressed that morning.
I put on the same outfit I had gotten before. The black boy shorts—that were not like Sasukes, so shut the fuck up—along with the black undershirt and yellow t-shirt on top. I ran my fingers through my hair, not even bothering to brush it, before double and triple checking the items in my kunai pouch.
I didn't want to be unprepared at all. I knew that would be a death sentence.
I glanced to the other beds in the room, frowning at the sight of Katsu's still empty bed. It was as neatly made as it had been the day before, and the day before that. It hadn't been touched. Everything looked the exact same since his stuff had disappeared.
I felt so guilty still. The things he said to me in the hospital room were a wake up call, and they were the reason I finally came to my senses. It was thanks to Katsu I started to see my true faults, and realized I didn't have to be a selfish coward. He was the one who made me realize such a thing, yet he probably felt as though I hated him for it.
When really, all I wanted to do was thank him.
In the other bed, was a snoring Ryuu.
Well—in the bed is a relative term. He hung out of it, body waist up leaning over the edge and dangling beside the banged up night stand. His legs were the only thing still laying in the bed, one leg kicked up over the duvet cover while the other laid beneath it. His silver hair that normally only stuck straight up, pointed all over the place like it was looking for a chakra signature.
I rolled my eyes.
He looked more like a mess than usual.
I glanced to the clock on the beat up night stand, before looking back to my drooling teammate that continued to snore.
If he didn't wake up soon, he was bound to be late for the final rounds and maybe even miss the whole event.
The thought of him screaming, running around attempting to get dressed to make it to the arena on time was funny as hell. Tripping over his own feet, struggling to put on his pants... it was nothing short of comedic gold. Truly I would have given anything to see that go down, but then again, I didn't want to subject myself to the wrath of Momo Sensei if she somehow found out I had the opportunity to get him there on time and didn't.
I sighed.
The things I do for others. They should really be more grateful for me, you know?
I walked over to Ryuu's bedside and stared down at him, crossing my arms.
He looked so pathetic, hanging off his bedside like a lymph noodle. Dangling there without an ounce of self control to make him sleep like a normal human being. I knew Ryuu was ungraceful. But this was just pathetic. I wished I had a camera on me to get a shot of this for later use.
You know... for the usual stuff... like blackmail purposes...
But unlucky for me, my old man and I only had one camera, and that camera was all the way at home in a box by the futon. Cameras weren't found often. In fact, I wasn't sure cameras were even widely available to the civilian public. If they were, they were probably crazy expensive for them. It would make sense. Cameras took pictures of things and made them easier to remember. Shinobi wanted to be forgotten.
I shook my head at the thought.
That didn't matter now. What did matter, was the pressing task of getting Ryuu's lazy ass out of bed. During the day he was like a kangaroo on crack. Getting him out of bed on the other hand, was almost impossible.
Notice how I said almost.
I cracked my knuckles. "Okay, buddy. Time to get up."
Did I try and shake him like a normal human being? No. I did not. It would only be a waste of time anyway. That would do nothing to get him up. I said it was difficult to get him up before, but that was an understatement. He was a literal fucking boulder.
Walking around to the other side of the bed, I hooked my arms underneath his body, before shifting my weight and rolling him forward to the floor with a thick tug.
There was the thunk of his body hitting the ground, and then total silence. For a second there, I was worried I had accidentally killed the guy.
That was until, I heard a gasp, and Ryuu shot right up from the floor like someone who had just woken from a coma.
He looked around like crazy, silver hair pointing everywhere and eyes wide as hell. "What the—?!"
I shifted my weight to one foot, popping my hip out with crossed arms. I gave him a smug look, it taking every fiber in my body not to give him the meanest smirk I had ever made. "Good morning."
He froze, before slowly turning over his shoulder to look in my direction. He blinked, not saying anything.
I raised a brow.
He continued to blink, before finally flashing me a bright smile. "Good morning, Kohana-chan! Were you the one who woke me up?"
"Yes." I walked around the bed and grabbed the clothes Ryuu had set out the night before. I tossed them to the bed, grabbing ahold of his sealing scrolls and kunai pouch, tossing them beside his clothes too. "Get dressed. The final rounds start in one hour, and I don't like being late. Shower, brush your teeth—please for the love of Kami brush your teeth—and then meet me in the lobby. You've got twenty minutes."
He smiled again. "Gotcha. I'll make it quick."
I shot him a look over my shoulder, rolling my eyes at the sight of his grin, before walking out and closing the door behind me.
I walked down to the lobby and flipped through a few of the magazines, not really taking in an interest in any of them. A majority of them I had seen thousands of times, thanks to my surrogate fathers disgusting habit of reading tabloids meant for females. I wasn't one for stereotyping, but when the magazine literally said woman's weekly, I don't think I was too far off from calling him a certified weirdo.
I didn't think my old man was a pervert, but I couldn't think of any other reason he would read that mindless bullshit.
Sure enough, as soon as seventeen minutes passed—I was counting so I could humiliate him later if he was late—Ryuu came bounding down the stairs and into the lobby. He eyed the wad of cash I left on the counter, before looking over to me. He jabbed his thumb in the direction of the extra ryo. "What's that for?"
I shrugged, playing it off. "Nothing. Let's get going. You may have been finished three minutes early, but we only have about forty minutes to get there. Like I said, I don't want to be late."
"Okay, okay." Ryuu grinned sheepishly, following me out the motel doors and into the streets.
A lot of people were heading to the stadiums. This time, I knew I was going the right way. Not because of some shitty map or because I somehow knew where we were going, but because of the conveniently placed signs everywhere with these big, blocky green arrows.
"So, you've been training hard?" Asked Ryuu, stuffing his hands into his pockets. He tilted his head back, looking at the sky as we walked.
"Yeah, I have been." I stared straight forward, arms folded across my chest. "My old man showed up. Not sure if you saw him around at all. I was surprised he showed up, really. I would have thought he stayed home to read his shitty magazines."
"Akaashi-san may not be super forward or loving with you, Kohana-chan, but I can tell he cares about you. A lot too. He wouldn't miss something like this for the world." He looked over and smiled. "Believe me. I see the way he looks at you. He's super proud."
I snorted. "I wouldn't say proud."
"No, it's true!" He laughed. "Akaashi-san is super duper proud of you. Even my oba-chan said so."
"Masumi-san?" I cocked my head to the side. "She said that?"
Ryuu nodded. "Oh yeah. Don't tell me you don't know about my oba-chans ridiculous crush on him. it's crazy! I don't see why she doesn't just go after him, really—"
"I already knew that," I interpreted, rolling my eyes. "I was talking about how Masumi-san said something about me and my old man."
"Oh, that!" Ryuu paused, thinking about it. "Well, she told me the way Akaashi-san looks at you, is the way a father should look at a daughter. She told me about how he acted around you as a baby, compared to now. Sure, she feels he could be more lovey with you, but that's just not his style. Not that it matters. She can tell he's proud of you."
Warmth bubbled in my chest at the thought.
I turned my head away, feeling my face heat up again.
"Oh."
Ryuu was quiet, before he suddenly burst out laughing. "Hey! What's with the shyness, huh?! I never new Kohana-chan could be bashful—"
"Shut your fucking mouth!" I snapped, shoving him away.
Ryuu only laughed harder, clenching his stomach as tears gathered at the corner of his eyes. "T-this is too good!"
"Whatever." I grumbled, recrossing my arms and glaring at the ground.
Ryuu calmed down, making a quiet 'whoo' noise, before stuffing his hands back into his pockets. He smiled faintly at the ground too, before turning his head in my direction. He stared, but didn't say anything.
"What are you staring at?" I looked at him with narrowed eyes. "Is there something on my face?"
Ryuu chuckled. "No. It's just... you seem different."
I raised a brow. "How so?"
He shrugged. "I dunno. You just seem more comfortable is all. Happier. Not to be rude or anything, Kohana-chan, since the last thing I want to do is hurt your feelings and all—but you were pretty cold and sorta distant before. I mean, yeah you hung out with Katsu-kun and I after missions sometimes, but hardly ever. But now... you just seem... more... you."
"I'm not following."
"Look what happened this morning." He elaborated. "Maybe you would have woken me up. But probably not. You probably would have let me sleep in late so I would miss the exams just because it would be funny. But now, you thought about how I felt before you did it. And now I'm gonna make it there on time! All thanks to you."
I blushed, turning away. "It's not like that, idiot."
"Sure, sure."
He punched me in the shoulder playfully. "I really appreciate it, you know? I'm glad you're getting happier and more comfortable. I care about you a lot too. We may be teammates, Kohana-chan, but I think of you as a sister."
He snorted, grinning. "Hell, we already know how my real sisters feel about you."
I cracked a small smile at the thought of the three little girls who I absolutely adored. It was true, I loved those little girls a lot, and they must have liked me enough to want my crusty ass to stick around after missions to hang out.
"Thanks." I said softly. "That means a lot."
"I've felt that way for a long time." Ryuu shot me another grin, climbing the steps to the stadium. "I'm just glad it's now out in the open and you know about it too. You're important to us. It's good you're starting to realize it."
I followed after him into the main part of the arena, still smiling.
"Yeah, I'm glad too."
authors note:
i felt as though i was neglecting ryuu's
character a bit, even though he's actually
very, very important to kohana. so their little bonding moment was necessary. at least i
felt that way.
ok so maybe im just making things
up or seeing things that aren't there,
but ive watched about seven or so episodes
of my hero academia and bakugo really,
really reminds me of kohana is that
just me?? idk man.
love ya!
-kat