Waiting for Edric to arrive at the estate the royal family owned was about as interesting as watching paint dry. Matis clearly didn't want to murder anyone. He simply wanted the throne and thought he found a way to get it without anyone getting physically harmed.
I wasn't sure what I'd do with him when I was queen. The idea of me ruling an entire race was laughable at best. I didn't follow were politics in any fashion. I didn't even follow human politics. I could maybe name the president of the United States. I stuck to my little hundred acre home in the middle of nowhere.
Matis had me locked in the bedroom and warned me against disclosing anything to Edric. The room wasn't nearly as big and grand as our bedroom at home, but it was probably the second nicest place I had been in. The walls were deep mahogany wood and the floors were covered in an expensive burgundy and gold threaded rug. The deep tray ceiling housed a massive gold and crystal chandelier. An entire wall was lined with books with a fireplace cut out. Another wall was made entirely of floor to ceiling windows though there was no balcony like we had at home.
I paced the room, waiting for Edric. I hadn't even let the idea of him being straight seep in yet. I wondered if I should wait to be home before breaching the subject or jump on the opportunity. I partially understood why he lied to me, but I didn't feel great about it.
Was he afraid I would tell Dominic? He knew he could trust me. I didn't know why he didn't tell me, but I had every intention of finding out. It was going to be torture to wait before grilling him. I deserved some answers. I was sick of the royals and all their backstabbing and secrets.
It was inevitable that I ruled the werewolves. I didn't want the position and I didn't know how to do it, but Dominic and Edric were pretty clear that I needed to do it. I didn't want a royal massacre on my conscience.
One thing I did know was that I refused to rule like Ivan and Catherine. I was going to be as transparent as possible. It was better for everyone if I didn't hide my motives. After the upheaval, people were going to be skeptical of me, of the entire system, and I wanted the werewolf community to feel secure.
Just thinking about everything that needed to change I was overwhelmed. My first few years were going to be incredibly difficult; I had no doubt about several attempts being made on the throne and myself. I was going to need a team I could trust.
I dug through the large heavy wood desk in search of paper and pen. When Edric showed up, I doubted we would be able to talk. I didn't know if I was being paranoid or smart though it was interesting how much those two traits crossed over.
I didn't have to wait long for Edric's arrival. I heard him coming down the long hallway, to my surprise alone. He almost always had someone with him.
The guard outside the door unlocked it and let Edric in. At the sight of him, anger filled my chest and I scribbled down what I knew on a piece of paper.
"You're early," I stated though I knew my sour expression gave away my true feelings.
"What's with the look?" He questioned as he walked over to the desk.
I crumpled the paper up, wound my thin arm back and threw it directly at him. Surprise colored his golden eyes as he caught the note and read it.
Understanding overtook his features.
"Amina," he started slowly.
"I don't want to hear it. I just want to get through the funeral and go home."
"I can explain."
"Don't bother. You can sleep on the fucking couch," I hissed.
"Fine," he bit back. "But when we get home, we will discuss this."
I shook my head and crossed the room into the bathroom. As much as I wanted to slam the door shut, I didn't. I had to pretend like everything was normal for Matis. He wanted me to push Edric towards abdicating so I had to make it seem like I would. At least until we could get on a plane back to Russia where Dominic and Alexei could help us.
A thought crossed my mind; I had wondered where the image of me and Dominic came from. It was taken from my bedroom window, but I hadn't seen or heard anyone. I instantly rejected the idea that Dominic could have been involved. There was no way.
Or was there?
Could Dominic have been behind the picture being taken? He was damn good at his job and he specialized in counter terrorism. Didn't that mean he would have seen or heard someone taking the picture? Wouldn't he have known someone else was there?
Then again, I hadn't noticed. I hadn't heard anything. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.
I didn't know where the picture came from and it was going to drive me nuts until I figured it out.
Edric knocked on the bathroom door. I rolled my eyes at the intrusion.
"Amina, we have a meeting to attend in thirty minutes," he called.
I carefully wrapped my hair in a towel and turned on the shower. I had been traveling for what felt like a million hours. I desperately needed a shower. I probably needed to wash my hair, but I didn't have time or the energy to bother taming it after.
I kept my shower disappointingly short and wrapped a towel around my body. I wanted to take advantage of the giant soaking tub since I never did at home. Being in our bedroom was fine, but I never really felt like it was mine.
I walked out into the bedroom to see Edric lounged at the desk. I never thought twice about changing with him in the room since I thought we played for the same team. Now that I knew the truth, I couldn't help but be guarded.
I stepped into the walk in closet and closed the door behind me whereas before, I probably wouldn't have bothered closing it. It shouldn't have mattered. I never caught him looking at me in a way I felt was more than platonic. He never commented on my body. He never so much as hinted at being interested.
Because even though he's straight, he still doesn't find me attractive.
It shouldn't have mattered, but for some reason it did. Whatever it was that initially made me self conscious reared its ugly head and I was right back to feeling like an insecure child around him.
Fucking asshole.
I slipped into my underwear and a form fitting black and charcoal tweed dress. I hated it, but it was part of my new and improved grieving attire.
I put on my low heels and walked out to stand in front of Edric. I turned my back to him and pulled my hair over my shoulder.
"Button me up," I clipped. "Please."
He did as I asked without question. I had to admit I was burning to ask him every question that popped in my head. I needed to know his side of the story.
I turned to him and he offered me his hand. As much as I didn't want to take it, I had grown accustomed to touching him in public. Holding his hand when we were out of our bedroom became second nature to me in the short time we were home. It was simple and innocent enough that it made us look effortless.
And since he still found me absolutely disgusting physically, effortless was a true accomplishment for him. An Emmy worthy performance.
The tension between us was palpable as we made our way down the hall hand in hand. My own discomfort spiked when I noticed Matis coming up the stairs. A friendly smile overtook his features and all I could think was how much I wanted to slap that fake brotherly-love look off his face.
Out of the corner of my eye, following behind Matis was Alonzo. My blood chilled at his very presence. I might have thought Edric was an asshole and I certainly didn't know the whole story when it came to his blackmail, but the fact that he had suffered in silence for however long because of those two was heartbreaking. No one should have their sexuality hijacked — or anything for that matter.
"The newest duchess," Alonzo's baritone voice greeted.
His black eyes held a metallic sheen making him appear even more dangerous, predatory.
I didn't bother responding. I didn't smile or nod in any fashion. I was disgusted by both of them. I didn't have siblings, but I couldn't imagine what Matis was doing to Edric. Matis took sibling rivalry to an all time high.
"Alonzo came on short notice, Amina. He wanted to support the royal family during this difficult time."
"Difficult time?" I asked.
"The passing of your mother and step father. My own mother died centuries ago," Alonzo informed me. "I remember how devastating the loss is."
A raise of my eyebrows was all he needed to let a smirk fall on his face. Matis must have told him I knew Edric wasn't gay. I didn't know if Edric thought he was protecting Matis by falling on the sword, but I fully intended to put a stop to their plan. I didn't want the throne, but I would take it if it meant Edric didn't have to live under constant fear of being accused of homosexuality.
I made a mental note to attack deeply embedded homophobia as soon as I was crowned. It was fucking ridiculous that sexuality could be used as a weapon against anyone.
"I see," I responded flatly.
Edric's grip on my hand tightened ever so slightly. I wasn't sure if it was intentional, but I remembered how he tensed the first time I met Alonzo. It didn't make sense at the time, but it certainly did now.
"No offense, Your Majesty, but my mother was not fond of vampires. I would hate for you to walk into a hostile situation."
A sly smile painted on his lips as he crossed his arms over his chest. I took note of his defensive posture and I knew he was threatened by me. I hadn't given him a reason to be, but I was glad regardless.
"Your concern for me is touching, sweetheart. I think I'll survive."
I offered a polite smile and looked up to Edric. "We should get going," I said lightly.
With a slight nod from Edric, we passed the snakes and went downstairs. He led me outside to see Alexei waiting by a black SUV.
Alexei held the door open for me as I slid in the back seat. I wasn't expecting to see Alexei, but he was a welcomed surprise.
I breathed a sigh of relief being away from Matis and Alonzo. As Alexei drove off the property I glanced at Edric.
"So you know," he stated.
I shook my head. "Yeah, Edric. I know."
"It was necessary. If you knew the truth-"
"I'm getting really sick of people deciding what I need to know," I shot back. "If I'm going to be queen, then you need to start acting like it."
I noticed Alexei's steely blue eyes examine me from the rear view mirror. Edric couldn't respond. He stared at me like I slapped him.
"Tell me your side. From the beginning," I prompted.
He sighed and ran a hand over his chocolate hair.
"Five years ago, Alexei received a series of images of Matis with Alonzo along with a note threatening to release them if we didn't do exactly as Alonzo said when he said. He demanded that I not be with anyone or he would release the pictures and claim it was me. Nothing happened until a few months ago when my parents started to parade potential wives through the palace.
"The day you met with Rosa, Alonzo showed up and threatened to kill you, out me and Matis, and crumble the werewolf monarchy if we didn't have you walk in that night."
While his voice never wavered, I could sense how bothered he was. Hell, he couldn't even look at me as he told me everything.
"It's not only Alonzo blackmailing you," I said softly.
His attention shot to me as he waited for me to continue. I hated to be the one to tell him, but I had to. I couldn't keep anything from him. Keeping secrets from each other was going to get one of us killed.
"It's Matis. He wants you to abdicate."
He shook his head. "No. He wouldn't-"
"He told me himself, Edric. He wants to rule and he's just biding his time until he forces you to abdicate."
"That's ridiculous, Amina. Matis has never been interested in ruling."
"You can think it's ridiculous all you want, but it's the truth. The sooner you accept it, the sooner we can take care of the problem."
"Take care of it in what way?" He asked.
"Hell if I know. You're spearheading this whole thing. I thought you'd have a plan."
"I'll think about it," he said absently.
"Think about it?" I demanded. "You're supposed to be the next leader of this race and you want to just think about it?"
"I am not the next leader of this race," he bit back. "You made it clear you want a divorce after this and I have no business ruling."
I paused at his words. His question of divorce finally made sense. Maybe he really had planned to tell me about the blackmail. Why else would he have questioned our marriage? I wasn't sure if that meant he wanted to stay married to me or if he just wanted to stay a royal.
I had gone my entire life not having to question the motives of men in my life. Even Rick had been fairly upfront with what motivated him. I wasn't used to dealing with hidden agendas and layered deception.
"You're acting like you even want to stay married to me. You can't stand me."
"Can't stand you," he scoffed. "Do you have any idea how difficult it's been to be around you? To share a bed with you and act as if you don't affect me at all?"
I searched his golden eyes for a hint of a lie and found nothing.
"I pushed you off on Dominic because I didn't know how long this was going to go on and I couldn't risk the throne not passing to us."
"But if I had gone through with that insane pregnancy plan, Alonzo would have known you were with someone and outed you."
"Power would have shifted to us before the pregnancy was announced. It wouldn't have mattered if he released the images because I thought I could protect Matis if we were ruling."
"Edric," I sighed. "You should have told me. When are you going to realize you can trust me?"
"I was going to tell you the other night before I left," he said pointedly. "However, Dominic was already there and I wasn't going to intrude."
The memory of that night flashed through my mind. Being with Dominic was otherworldly, but that gnawing guilt ravaged me. Maybe I had always suspected Edric wasn't gay. Maybe that was why I felt so guilty being with Dominic because deep down I always wondered if — or wanted there to be — the possibility of our marriage working existed.
I stayed silent and in that moment I knew I was wrong for sleeping with Dominic. The second I felt like I had to hide it from Edric was the second it became wrong. I couldn't be with Dominic while I was still married to Edric regardless of whether or not my marriage was a sham. It went against everything my father taught me about relationships and marriage and honesty.
And I needed to be honest with Edric. Secrets and lies were what landed us in hot water every time and I was sick of it.
"Well, you won't have to worry about intruding anymore," I said as I picked at my nail beds. "Until we're divorced, I can't be with him again."
His suspicious eyes were something I hadn't accounted for. I was honestly surprised that he was suspicious of anything I did.
"Why?" He questioned.
"Because even if our marriage is a sham, I was raised to respect it. And I haven't done that so far."
"I don't fault you for being with him, Amina."
"But I do. I acted on impulse and that's not who I am. I was set on making this marriage work until I saw you with Alonzo."
He huffed a laugh and tapped his finger on the arm rest. "Probably one of the most difficult things I've ever done."
"Pretended to be gay?"
"Having to convince you that I was."
I felt for him. I really did. I was amazed at how much he was willing to sacrifice because he thought he was protecting Matis. I couldn't have given up sex for five years. As a male werewolf, he was willing to take the fall for his brother when he knew exactly what would happen to him if he was outed.
It was incredibly noble of him and forced me to view Edric in an entirely different light. He was willing to give up everything for his brother. Matis' betrayal had to cut him deeper than he showed me.
"Are you going to be okay?" I asked.
"Why do you ask?"
I rolled my eyes. "Because I care."
"You need to get that eye roll under control if you ever want to rule effectively."
I laughed at his jab, thankful for the shift in mood.
"I'll be fine. It'll take awhile to get my head around this Matis situation, but I'll handle it."
"Where are we going anyway?" I asked absently.
"Nowhere. I needed to speak with you privately and this was the only way to do it."
"Smart," I mumbled.
I glanced up at a silent Alexei, damn near having forgot he was there. It didn't bother me to speak freely in front of him though. He knew the ins and outs of our lives and kept everything to himself. Alexei was wildly loyal, perhaps even more so than I initially thought. He and Edric were truly friends. When Edric was alone, he still had Alexei to lean on. Hell, he had me too and I hoped one day he would realize that he could count on me just as much as he could count on Alexei.