12a part
Joey Pov
I was waisted as fuck... The tequila and some beer on that was great! Vodka was not my thing thou but I was drunk, something I needed to be... I was waiting for Theresa. She wanted to talk to me... I had called her mom too, I never said that out loud, it was just something I said two times in my head. I saw her car coming up trow the drive way and I jumped in.
Theresa: drink some of this honey
She gave me a mineral water bottle, I pressed it to my lips and drank. I spilled some because my mind was dizzy.
Theresa: don't worry about your dad, I told him you were sleeping in your room with the door locked and that I are at meting with a friend and spend the night at a hotel. I will take us to a hotel to let you rest and that i can talk to you
Joey: I can handle myself you know...
Theresa: I know, but in your age you should not drink and go trow stuff like this
Joey: what do you mean?
Theresa: I know heartbreak is hard Joey, Shane really loves you. The part that your dad cant accepts it is something no one should go trow, people need to be accepted for who they are
Joey: So, your not with dad that me and Shane should not be together ?
Theresa: Of corse not, Shane and you were happy together, at least the parts I have seen, Shane's my son, you are my stepson you both need to accepted what ever its about
Joey: So you let me drink if i said so?
Theresa: I don't think its a good idea for you to do that, but sure your a grown up soon and you choose that yourself by now
Joey: Im thankful you see it like that
Theresa: we all need to grow up, take care of our own life's and you and Shane are in that age when parents have to let you go
Theresa was right... I was finely seeing why my dad wont me be with Shane... He doesn't want me to leave him... Im his only son, he lost his daughter and now doing everything to keep me in his life. I haven't been dating serious in a while, dad knows that... if he see me happy with shane... he think I will leave him for starting my own life with Shane, Shane will be my number one, not my dad. I feel horrible, I haven't told my dad that I love him in a while because I never understood why.
Joey: drive home
Theresa: your drunk Joey
Joey: i need to tell dad that I love him...
She drove the car back home, I stood by the door, writing away my theirs.
Theresa: you do the right thing honey
Joey: thanks The... mom
We both smiled and I open the door, dad was crying on the living room, he then saw me and got up to me.
Dad: i thought you ran away...
Joey: I was going to... but I cant...
Dad: have you been drinking
Joey: Im sorry...
He hugged he into a tight hug.
Dad: my sweet son, don't you ever leave me
Joey: I love you dad, but I need to try my wings, fly on my own, leave the nest. Getting my own family
Dad: I know, I just don't want you to forget me
Joey: I cant forget you, your my dad, nothing can ever change that, I love you
Dad: I love you too son
I hugged him tighter and he stroke my hair and gave it a small kiss.
Joey: You what els I love?
Dad: Shane?
Joey: yeah...
Dad: Is he making you happy?
Joey: yes
I looked into my dads eyes, he took a deep breath.
Dad: If... it feels right for you, making you happy, making you feel safe, get him then
He said with a smile in the end. I was happy, dad accepted me!
Joey: thank you dad!!
Dad: Just use condones
Joey: we will
I ran up the stairs to go to Shane's room, I opened it, not border to knock.
Joey: Shane!
I looked around, and Shane was not there, I took a closer look and looked beside his bed. There he was lying on the floor, not moving! What happen to him!?
Joey: Shane!!
I flew over to him and grabbed his body, the monument made me dizzy because i still had alcohol in my system...
Joey: Shane!? Shane, talk to me!!
I tried to shake him awake, but nothing happen. I felt after his pulse and it was really low...
Joey: MOM!! DAD!! CALL AN AMBULANCE!!
I held into Shane's almost lifeless body, crying into his body. He cant leave me, I love him. Theresa ran up to see her son.
Theresa: omg! what happen?!
Joey: I don't know! I found him like this
Theresa: Hold his head, he needs air
I laid Shane's head to my lap, stroking his hair. HIs face was almost white... It was scary to see. I kissed his cheek whispering to his ear that he cant leave me, that I love him and I want him to wake up.
I looked around to the beside table... I saw a knocked bottle of pills... did shane over dose?! Why? Fuck no, I wont let him go!
After a while two women came in, taking Shane with them. We followed them down and Theresa made it trow the door but dad stopped me.
Joey: NO dad!! I have to be with him!!
Dad: Clam down Joey, let Theresa be with him
Joey: But i need to tell him that it will be okey!
Dad: He will Joey, now sit
I looked trow the big window and the ambulance drove away. I claimed down, letting my dad hug me.
Dad: Shane will make it, don't worry
I want to believe him, so I just sat down and turned on the tv and laid a blanket around me.
It started to get late, I haven't moved from the couch, letting the shows row by, i think i have scene a whole session on "How i met your mother" by now.
Dad: go to bed honey, its 2 in the night
Joey: I wait for them to come home...
Dad: Get some sleep Joey, this is not good for you, beside weren't you drunk?
Joey: not that much, I handle it...
Dad laid his arms around me from behind, kissing my head.
Dad: good night Joey, its nice to have you back at least
He got back to bed, Theresa haven't even called. Im dead worried. I wont let Shane die, I have already lost my mom, sister and section best boyfriend... Sorry Corner... I love Shane to much to lost him, I cant be the same like last time. I just want my boyfriend back. I think i fall asleep by then...
The time I woke up was by the front door, Theresa! She had her face to the ground, she looked terrible, I don't think shes been sleeping very good... beside... she was along...
Joey: Were is Shane?
Theresa looked up at me with shock, I don't think she know that I was sleeping here.
Theresa: Oh honey...
She sat down beside me, crying. She tried to clam down thou.
Theresa: Shane is... his... his with god now honey...
Joey: No... NO! Shaney!! Omg this is all my fault!
Theresa: No is not honey
Joey: yes it is! I told him I didn't like him anymore!! I told him that we never could be together... Now his fucking gone!!
Theresa: I know its hard for you Joey, but its nothing we can do about it now
Joey: He think i hate him!! I fucking love him, I wasn't able to tell him that! I want Shane back!!!!
I broke to the floor crying, Theresa took my body and tried to clam me down, I never did anything right to Shane!! Nothing! I should have treat him better! I should have told him that I love him more, this was all my fault!
The rest of the day I cried the whole day, my friends tried to call me but i had hided my phone in the closet, but I could still hear the tone... I was in Shane's room. Hugging his pillows, felling the last smell of him.
I had a photo of me and him on our first day as boyfriends, we were laying in my bed, shirtless and I laid on Shane's chest, cuddling while smiling to the camera, Shane had his arm around me and his hand rested on my shoulder while he in the other hand held the camera and took the photo. Our first "Boyfriend" picture, it was broken by the etches after Shane broke up with me. It was the only thing i had left of him now, a single photo and broken memories...
In the background I had our song playing. "Safe and sound" with Julia Sheer.
"Just close your eyes
the sun is going down
you will be okey
no one can hurt you now
good morning light
you and I will be safe and sound"
The words make me cry, I miss Shane, I wasn't able to keep Shane safe. Instate i made him take his life. I looked over to the pill bottle beside me... some pills were left, I didn't Dad or Theresa be in the room, so they were still there. I saw the empty glass beside... should I?
With out thinking I took the bottle and the glass, filling the glass with water in the bathroom. Theresa and Joe was down crying... Im sorry for them, but I need to be with Shane. He needs me more, his all along, they have etch other. I got back to Shane's room. I sat on the spot i found Shane on, and leaded to the beside table, took some pills in my hand and the glass of water in the other. I was following Shane, dying the same way he did, heartbreak. But I will find him!
I took in the pills in my mouth and swallowed it with water. I laid the water glass back on the table. Waiting, I felt how my breathing got rough, my body was telling me to find air, but my mind told me to keep going. My eyes fell, and so did I. I was starting to get really warm. I was laying on the floor and let myself wait, the wait was a pain until I didn't feel anything. I made it! Shane Im coming
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First of all! This is not the end!
Next!
Congrats to my best friends Luke and Matias for one year of real cute love! They are so fucking cute together! You should see them some time! Aww!
Well, it means a lot to me because Luke has a really sad story behind him and it was like this. Luke and I have been friends for one and a half years now and he was bisexual but then he saw that he only was gay. He said is was time to come out from the closet, so he told his best friend at school.
Just the next break, the whole school known. Luke was not accepted by anybody by this he lost all his friends, he called me under class that day, told me what happen, so I planed a trip to him the same weekend to be there for him. He's mom picked him up and he got home to cry out.
So some days later I came over and were at his house to cheer him up and it was better. Then Luke got to school one day after his mom told him that he had to and wasn't able to stay home more day. So he came to school, people were saying like "jävla bög" *fucking gay* and stuff like that.
But by lunch time, an other boy sat beside him and told him that Luke was brave to tell the school. Luke had seine the guy before but never talked to him. The boys name was Matias and he told Luke he was gay but to scared to come out to anyone. Luke and Matias became friends and Luke asked Matias out one day and one year ago, they had there first kiss and became the cute boyfriends they are today. I just hope they stay together because they are both my best friends ❤️❤️
I wanted to share this 100% true story because it just make people see that it possible to find your love of your life even if you have to go trow some shit on the way. Matias and Luke were bullied, but at least they had etch other. It's just a true, cute love story!
Question of the day!
I just want you all to give some love to the world and give someone a hug, telling it you love it no mater what, it can be your mom, dog or what ever! I'm going to give some love to my best friends because I love them so much❤️❤️
Another thing? Should I get a tattoo? I was thinking birds on my shoulder?
May the odds be ever be in your favor my little Stitch baby's gooooddd byeee