dear love of my life

t h i r t y - f i v e

josephine is asleep, she is exhausted with all the kids and i thought i'd let her sleep and keep the kids downstairs because my girl needs her sleep. i'm sitting on the bean bag in the playroom, aleyna and liam are playing with puzzle - they both love puzzles. ethan and emily are both in their baby bouncers. emily's bouncer is black and white with a little elephant on the top of it, ethan's bouncer is grey with a little elephant on it as well - they're both watching peppa pig. i've given them all breakfast - i have the older two cereal and the younger two had milk - as usual.
liam gets up from the little table and walks over to the bean bag that i am sitting on, scrolling through instagram - looking at all the cute edits people make of me and jo.
"daddy, aleynas being bossy" he says, sitting next to me.
i chuckle at him, it's cute how she's bossing him around but he really doesn't like it. i pick him up from next to me and place him on my lap and he cuddles into me, he's tired. jo must be awake by now, i'll take liam up and then check if she's awake. i pick liam up and put him in his little bed, he shares room with aleyna. his eyes close as soon as his head hits the pillow.
i then go back downstairs to check if the twins are awake, emily is knocked out asleep and ethan is falling asleep. aleyna is now sitting on the bean bag, watching peppa pig - i leave her there.
i take the twins upstairs and put them both in their separate cots and then go and check on josephine. not that she needs checking on but i just want my girl.
the door creaks open as i move it open with my hand, josephine is laying on her side reading a book she's been wanting to start for ages - love is a mixtape.
"hey" i say, jumping into bed beside her.
jo closes her book and places it on the bedside table - turning around to face me.
"are you okay?" she asks me
i nod, kissing her forehead ever so gently. everyday, i find it difficult to process that i am married to this beautiful woman.