Chapter 80
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„God I'm tired." Yoongi muttered pulling off the jacket he'd been wearing and carelessly throwing it over his office chair. Jimin followed right after him, yawning tiredly. The evening sure had been eventful.
"I'm gonna take a shower." Yoongi was going through his closet, searching for something he could wear to sleep. He settled with a black shirt and gray sweats.
"Alright." Jimin walked over to the closet as well, pecking Yoongi's cheek before grabbing clothes for himself too. The older's clothes were admittedly not nearly as soft as his own, but they smelled like him and that made it one hundred percent worth it every time.
"Hurry up. I wanna cuddle." Jimin ordered, slapping Yoongi's ass in a joking manner.
Yoongi didn't miss his chance to drop a teasing "kinky." before walking to the bathroom. "I'll be as quick as I can." The door closed and Jimin waited a couple of seconds just to make sure Yoongi had everything and wouldn't come out again, before stripping himself and slipping into Yoongi's clothes.
It was funny how he and Yoongi had such a different look and Jimin seemed to be a lot more muscular, but they still appeared to be wearing the exact same size of clothing. Maybe Yoongi's clothes were even a bit wide at times. Jimin liked wide clothes, though, so he wasn't going to complain.
Smiling happily, he flopped down onto the bed before reminiscing about the day. Or more so, the evening. Jimin couldn't help but think of how the boy had obviously wanted something from Yoongi. The way his hand had trailed over Yoongi's chest down to his... Jimin pressed his lips into a thin line. If Yoongi would have said yes, the boy totally would have been willing to fuck.
The boy had been attractive too. Obviously a bottom. He was so uncomplicated in comparison to Jimin. Maybe they would have made a better pair if Yoongi had given him a chance. The older wouldn't have to be sexually frustrated anymore. Neither would the person he was with have a story of bullying people that were just like him. Even now that he was trying Jimin did fall into old patterns at times.
He'd lashed out at someone today at the library. It wasn't a long thing. He'd realized what he was doing quite quickly but that didn't change the fact that he kept doing it. He was an impulsive asshole, petty, territorial, but at the same time wasn't willing to give at all.
He and Yoongi had been dating for more than a month now and Jimin still didn't even change clothes in front of Yoongi. It was ridiculous. He had no idea why Yoongi put up with all of that. With all of him. Why, when he could easily have someone uncomplicated and easy like Minjun today? Yoongi was attractive. It wasn't that he couldn't be picky.
Jimin sighed, burying his face in Yoongi's pillow. The familiar scent helped him calm down, but he still felt like he was treating Yoongi unfairly.
He could hear the bathroom door open and steps walking towards the bed. He didn't bother looking up. Maybe he could suffocate himself using the pillow. Did sound like the best way out if he was being honest.
"Are you asleep?"
Jimin shook his head, still hiding in the pillow. Yoongi let himself fall down on the bed next to Jimin, placing an arm over the boy while getting comfortable on his side.
"Something wrong?"
Jimin groaned frustratedly. "Yeah." His voice was muffled by the fabric but audible.
"What is it?"
Jimin sighed, lifting his head before looking at Yoongi. "I'm an annoying piece of work."
Chuckling warmly Yoongi leant forward, dropping his head on the pillow just centimeters from Jimin's face. "I know, so what's the problem?"
Jimin groaned, glancing to the side. "Why is it always me who needs help?"
"It's not always you. You help me a lot too." Yoongi stated, caressing Jimin's cheek with the palm of his hand. "Come on, tell me. What problem did your pretty head make up this time?" His tone was teasing, but open at the same time.
Jimin leant into the touch. "I just... I really don't know why you're even giving me a chance. Like, I'm just work and I hardly give you anything in exchange." The boy admitted, cuddling up to Yoongi more.
"Where did that come from?" Yoongi asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow.
"Today. Minjun was so trying to have you fuck him. And for some weird reason you decide to choose me, who literally lets you do nothing and struggles with being decent most of the time, over a sweet fuckable guy?" Jimin muttered, his fingers grabbing onto Yoongi's t-shirt. There was something soothing about holding onto Yoongi.
Yoongi sighed. "Jimin... you know that when I decided that I'd be willing to try a relationship with you that also meant I chose you without sex over anyone else with sex? That just means you without sex is a lot more appealing to me than a depressed drunk teenage virgin in his coming out crisis. And that's literally what today was by the way. Honestly that guy had absolutely nothing on you and not just him, okay? I like what you have to offer a lot more than that."
Jimin couldn't help but feel lighter at that statement. He fake sniffed, running his hand over his nose. "So what you're saying is that you're after my money after all because I'm pretty sure there is nothing else that would be worth liking about me?"
"Do you want me to hit you?" Yoongi threatened warmly, leaning in and kissing Jimin softly. Jimin closed his eyes, enjoying the kiss while it lasted. Jimin let out a sigh when they separated again.
"I feel bad, you know. For not giving you something that should be part of a relationship usually." Jimin admitted, pushing his hair back.
"Well if so what about you? By being in a relationship with you I stop you from anything sexual too. Do you feel that bad about it? Like you're missing out on something. Because honestly I don't. I like what you give me and I won't ask for more."
Jimin opened his mouth a couple of times. He'd never thought about it that way. If he was being honest he somehow forgot that usually he would be having sex. He'd thought about Yoongi not getting what he wanted, but what about him? Did he miss sex? Not really. If he did he probably would have noticed earlier.
"That's... a fair point." Jimin admitted. "It's different though. You'd want to have sex with me... I'm being complicated."
Yoongi sighed. "Jimin, it's not different for the two of us... and not being attracted to the other gender is nothing you should feel bad for. You like boobs? Yeah me too. I get it. Do I have them? Sorry, no. Guess we'll have to work through this in other ways even if that means we'll never have sex."
Jimin chuckled, burying his face in Yoongi's chest. "You're the best... you know that?"
"I'm glad you think so." He pecked the crown of Jimin's head before pulling the boy into a tight hug. "Don't ever think you owe me sex or something like that. If we do something at some point, I want you to enjoy it as well. Don't force yourself. You'd make me sad. A relationship isn't about sex. Sex is a nice part that comes with it, but it's more about being able to rely on the other person and trusting them and I feel like we're doing pretty well in that department."
Jimin nodded tiredly. "True. I trust you. Probably more than myself." He chuckled.
"Same though." Jimin could hear the smile in Yoongi's words. "You should sleep now. It's getting late."
Jimin yawned, moving away from Yoongi to get into a better lying position on his back. Yoongi moved closer, draping his arm over Jimin's stomach before using Jimin's chest as a pillow. "Good night." He sounded just as tired as Jimin was.
"Good night. Sweet dreams."
A/N
Jimin being insecure is so cute somehow❤