extremely long chapter!
june
it's been three months and i couldn't believe it. i couldn't believe joey really turned himself in, he didn't even tell me, i mean he did but i was asleep so i couldn't yell at him.
his sentencing was in three days, dev and i visited as much as we could before his sentencing. we still didn't know how much time he's gonna get, he wasn't too focused on it either. he always asked how we were doing and how the baby was. i finally found out what the gender of my baby is gonna be and i'm so excited. we were gonna go see him today that way joey and i could find out the gender together.
"you ready?" dev asks. i nod and grab the envelope that contained the gender of my kid and slipped it inside my pocket.
joey
"birlem you got a visitor!" i sat up from my bunk and walk over to my cell door. i look at the officer as i stuck my hands out. he handcuffs them together and opens the cell door.
i follow him over to the visitation room. a smile forms on my lips when i see dev and june sitting there. the officer uncuffs my arms before i make my way over to the table.
june looks over at me, she immediately stands up and pulls me into a hug. "i missed you so much." she whispered. "i missed you too june."
i pull away a second later and bro hug dev. "how you holding up in here man?" he asked as we pulled away. i shrug and sit down. "i've been better, the food here is disgusting, dudes trying to steal your shit. it's horrible."
"should've thought of that before becoming a criminal right?" dev chuckled making me chuckle a bit. "yeah i wish things ended up differently." i look down at the table.
june
"i have something for you." i smiled as i took the envelope out of my pocket. joey looks up and stares at the envelope. "is that-"
i nod. "it has the gender of the baby and i want you to read it."
"do you know what it is?" he asked. i shook my head. "i wanted to wait to find out that way we can find out together." i hand him the envelope.
he takes it and studies it closely. "holy shit." i heard him mutter under his breath. a huge grin appears on his face, he looks at both dev and i. "ready?" we both nod.
joey opens up the envelope slowly, taking out a small folded piece of paper. before he could open it, he reaches over and takes my hand into his. he takes a deep breath before unfolding the paper.
his eyes were beginning to turn glossy, a tear even escaped down his cheek. he flickered his eyes over at me. "it's a boy, i've wanted a boy since the beginning."
"boy or girl it doesn't matter, i'm really happy i'm carrying your child joey." i smiled warmly. he brought my hand up to his lips and kissed it softly. "i'm glad you're caring my child june."
"congrats to you both." dev says.
"visitations over, please say your last goodbyes and head out!" one of the guards say. i stood up from my seat and kissed his softly one last time before hugging him.
"inmate birlem, speed it up!" the guard shouts. joey rolled his eyes and hugged dev.
"take care man." he pats his back loudly. "and take care of june and my son, hopefully my sentencing gives us good news." he smiled a bit.
"we're praying for you joey, soph is gonna come and hopefully she brings your mother." joey nods slowly.
"i won't warn you again birlem!"
joey rolled his eyes. "i'm going!" he kisses my forehead before walking backwards with a smile on his face. he waves at us before turning around and walking out of the visitation room.
"he's gonna be okay." dev says. i nod and rest ku head against his chest. "i hope so." i mumble. he wraps his arm around me before making our way out of the prison.
joey
i head back into my cell where i see my bunky trying to shove his drugs down his pants. he looks over at me and chuckles. "drug sweep, id stuff it down my throat but i could die from that."
"so you're just shoving it down your pants?" i asked him. he nods. "it's not like they're gonna check in there, plus i already have a big d-"
"shut up." i rolled my eyes before he could say anything else.
since they were doing a drug sweep i decided to hide any of my contraband while i was at it. i got to keep the piece of paper that had my baby's gender on it i stashed it inside the pocket of my shirt.
i grabbed my book and flipped through the pages trying to look for my coke. once i find it i grab it and set the book down. i look around trying to look for s good hiding spot, i look over at martinez my bunk mate. "i'll give you my hot cheetos in exchange for shoving my drugs down your pants." i tell him.
he sits there, thinking about it before nodding. i hand it over to him just in time as one of the guards walk in. "inmates martinez and birlem, step aside this is a random drug sweep."
martínez and i stand by the cell door watching two guards toss our shit, not missing an inch of the cell. they go through our drawers and toss our beds around. after they couldn't find anything they tell us to clean up and that we're good.
i pick all my stuff up and put it away where it goes. after doing so i walk out of my cell and look around at all the inmates who were either walking around or playing with each other.
i walk over to the cell phone booth since there wasn't anyone there. i punch in sophia's number and press the phone against my ear, waiting for an answer. she picked up after four rings. "hello? joey is that you?"
i smile and nod, even though she couldn't see me. "hey sis, how are you?"
"i'm good big brother? how are you? i miss you so much i still can't believe you turned yourself in." i sigh.
"i know, i kind of regret because i miss being with june and talking to her. in here i have no one."
"i'm sorry joey. i'm hoping your sentencing goes well, does your lawyer think you could fight this?"
i shrug. "she basically told me i'm going to rot in here. i'm so fucking scared soph, i don't want to die in this damn place."
"don't worry brother, i'm gonna be there for you. mom said that i can go if i want to, she's going to be there."
my face lit up. i let out a small smile as i spoke into the the phone. "moms going to be there?"
"yes, she said she's going to be there for emotional support i guess? i'm not sure, but we're going."
"what about dad?" i questioned.
she was silent for a moment, guess i got my answer. "forget about dad." i shook my head. "he's a piece of shit anyways."
i heard her giggle, i heard voices in the background. it sounded like it was my father. "i have to go joey, but i just want you to know i love you big brother no matter what. you got this."
"thank you sis." i smile. "i love you too, bye." i hang up the phone and sigh. i'm hoping everything goes well
three days later
i button up the middle button of my blazer that june and dev have brought for me for my sentencing. they thought that it would make me more professional and hope the judge doesn't see me as a lost cause.
"you ready mr. birlem?" i heard my lawyer say from outside the door. i fix my hair in the mirror, i take a long look at the handcuffs around my wrists. i swallow the lump in my throat as i stared at myself in the mirror.
i shook it off and walk out of the bathroom. "let's kick ass." i tell her. she nods and walks with me into the court room.
-
"mr. birlem, it's so nice to meet the youngest, most wanted criminal." the judge told me. i shoot her a smile and nod. "it's nice to meet you too, your honor."
"i've heard lots of things about you birlem. i've seen you on the news and i know all the things you've done, i prayed id be the one in charge of your sentencing." she adds.
"what do you say your honor? you got hope for me?" i asked her. she didn't say anything, all she did was stare at me and give me a small shrug. "we'll see."
i broke eye contact with her and looked away. i heard footsteps followed by footsteps enter the courtroom. one of the officers came over to me and uncuffed my hands. he stood by the wall and stared at me while i stretched my wrists.
my lawyer and i sat down at our defense table. the prosecutor walked in and stood at his table. it made me even more nervous. i kept turning around and waited for june, dev my sister and my mother. they hadn't showed up yet.
i stared at the doors waiting for them. at last dev and a very pregnant june walked in. june made eye contact with me. she grinned and waved at me before shooting me a kiss. dev smiled at me and sat down with june behind me. the jury then walked in and sat down at their spots. the doors were starting to close and still no sophia or my mother. i guess they could join in later.
"all rise." the bailiff says. everyone stood up except for the judge. "the honorable madam justice rosa genesis presiding."
"you may be seated." the judge says. everyone sits down as do i. i can tell this was already going to take long.
halfway through the session i was losing hope. the judge had mentioned all other crimes i have done such as being in charge of the bank robbery's i have done, i was charged with trafficking heroin which was also true.
lastly i was charged with first degree murder, my sisters murder. the prosecutor kept trying to make things up that didn't even happen, but my lawyer proved that the accusations were wrong by saying that i had no signs of scratching, bruising or stuff like that on my body which a murder would normally have. they did however found someone else's dna which was still unknown. of course the prosecutor had to go and say that i made someone do the dirty work for me while i sat back and watched her die. it was ridiculous.
what didn't help was that they did find my dna on her, they found bruises and cuts on her body. she also had a major bruise on her neck where the murderer would usually be choking her. also, i was holding her in my arms when my parents had found us, they used that against me as well.
"mr. birlem." the judge says, making me break my thoughts. i look over at her. "your honor."
"do you have anything else to say?"
i swallowed the lump in my throat. i could feel everyone's eyes on me, it made me feel anxious. i always hated being the center of the attention. "yes your honor." i stood up slowly.
"i know what everybody is thinking.." i start off. "joey birlem, the most dangerous kid in the state of california who ruined his life by falling into the wrong group of people during high school. he needs to be locked up forever and get the key thrown away."
i lock my eyes with the judge. "i had hope, ive always had hope. i know what i did and didn't do. i might've robbed a bank, trafficked drugs, yeah sure. one thing i didn't do? was murder my sister." i shook my head.
"i loved my sister with my whole heart, i really did. i wouldn't do anything to hurt her, we've never argued, we never laid a finger on each other unless it was to hug. she was always there for me and unlike my parents she actually made me feel wanted and loved. she didn't judge the decisions i had made my high school years because she knew i was still learning and growing. the night of her murder tore me to pieces. we were watching a movie and enjoying our popcorn, we were having fun." i could see a small smile form on the judges lips.
i continued. "i had to take a call after our first movie finished. she ran upstairs and went to search for another movie to watch while i went outside to answer my phone. it was my friend, tayler holder. he had called me and told me he was having trouble with his brother and that he needed me as soon as possible. before i answered him i heard screams and stuff breaking from inside the house. i immediately ran back inside and searched for my sister. i ran upstairs and when i walked into her room she was-"
i stopped for a moment to take a deep breath. i was pouring my eyes out and my breath was shaky. i wiped my eyes and continued. "s-she was dead." i gulped. "i found my sister laying in a puddle of her own blood. there wasn't anyone else in the room, the burglar must've escaped out the window before i got there. i sat on the floor, took her into my arms and cried my eyes out like a little kid when they fall and scrape their knee. around that time my parents had came home and saw us."
"they instantly pointed their finger at me because why wouldn't they? i'm the black sheep in the family, the one who fucked up and brought the most pain and danger into the family. they wanted to see their criminal son locked up for good. i guess you could say they were scared of me." the judge looked away from me.
"i was the kid they didn't want or loved. they made me feel worthless and unwanted. they were willing to blame my sisters death on me rather than let me explain what had happened. if i could change one thing about me, it'd be the way i ended up. i'd do anything to be able to hug my sister one last time and i'd do anything to make my parents love and accept me."
the room was silent for a moment. i could tell i left everyone speechless, even the judge. i didn't want to look behind me, i couldn't face june or dev right now. this was all so much for me to handle. i felt so alone right now. even in a room full of people. no one has my back on this and no ones willing to believe me.
"let's take a five minute recess, shall we? the jury then will come back and give us the verdict." the judge hits the gavel against the sound block before getting up and walking out. everyone else did the same.
i decided to get out of the court room to get some fresh air but of course i had to get my wrists handcuffed and had to be watched by a guard. i stepped out of the courthouse and sat down by the door where a guard stood a few inches away from me. i tried to take in as much sunlight as i could since i couldn't go out much while i was in prison.
i heard footsteps approach me but i didn't bother to look up. then i saw a pair of familiar shoes. i bring my head up and see a huge bump followed by my girlfriends face. i stood up slowly and looked at june. her eyes were puffy and it looks like she just got done crying.
i didn't say anything. i pull her into a tight hug and held her in my arms for what seemed like forever. the guard didn't say anything, he did however take my handcuffs off so i could hold june. "i love you so much joey." she sobbed into my shoulder. "i don't want anything bad happen to you!"
i ran my fingers through her hair. "i'm going to be fine june." i pull away and cup both her cheeks. "i'm going to be fine, hopefully everything turns out well for me." i kiss her lips softly. "i love you so so much, thank you for sticking by my side through all of this." i peck her lips one last time.
"times up." the guard says making me pull away. he takes both my arms and handcuffs my hands before taking a hold of my arm. we start backing away slowly, i didn't take my eyes off june. "i love you" i mouthed.
"i love you too." she said loudly.
"it's a good thing you guys said your last i love you's" the guard told me as we walked back inside the courtroom. "i've seen cases like yours joseph, they don't end well." he uncuffs my hands and sits me back down. my lawyer walks in and sits down next to me.
the guards words stook by me and he was right, this wasn't going to end well.
-
"will the defendant please rise." the judge starts off. i stood up slowly. "this has been a hell of a ride mr. birlem. your words touched me earlier, they really did. i felt something for you i have never felt for any of my other cases. may god have mercy upon your soul."
i looked at her confused as she said the last sentence. what did she mean by that? i look over at my lawyer but she avoided eye contact with me. i gulped and look back at the judge.
the judge looks over at the jury. "have you reached a verdict?"
one of the ladies stand. "we have your honor." i look over at the lady. "we the jury find the defendant.." she stopped mid sentence which raised the suspense. "guilty for murdering the first degree."
i didn't say anything. a tear ran down my cheek. i look over at the judge. "for this crime.." the judge meets my eyes. "the court sentences you to be put to death for the first degree murder of bella birlem."
my heart stopped, i started to feel dizzy. i was being put to death for a murder i didn't do. i didn't hear the rest of the things the judge was saying, i was still in shock. i started pouring my eyes out. this wasn't fair. i was going to lose everything that i have. i was gonna lose june and dev and most importantly, i wasn't going to be able to meet my son, ever.
the guard walked behind me and handcuffed both my hands together. i shut my eyes closed and sobbed silently as i was escorted out of the court room by the guard. i couldn't help but think that this was really the end of my life, the end of me.