SHE KNEW she should have been terrified, but Andorra wasn't. She stood there, slipping back and forth between the human realm and the in-between until it was as easy as breathing. She was getting good at using the nails in her mind to scrape open a tiny sliver, just big enough for her to squeeze through.
She found that she didn't even have to use anger; it was as easy as breathing now. She had a suspicion that it was her anger that brought her to that dark place, so she didn't even attempt to use that to drag up her magic. Now, she thought happy thoughts as she slipping to the in-between.
The in-between was a strange place, mostly because it was similar to lucid dreaming. She would imagine a place and then she'd be there, the world around her glimmering and shimmering, and it wasn't until she stepped through did she finally land in reality. It was simple, honestly, and she wondered why she'd had so much trouble with it in the first place.
Right then, she was testing just how far she could go. She'd started by transporting in and out of the palace, which had shocked Oberon so much he fell out of the chair he was perched on in the study. She went in and out of rooms without taking a step, then she went to and from town, zipping all around in the in-between.
But, she wanted more. She was exhilarated with all of the traveling she'd done, and she was eager for so much more. She wanted to stretch, she wanted a challenge. So when she slipped into the in-between, she thought of her parents.
She was transported immediately to Maine, standing in her house, looking at her parents in the living room, the world around her shimmering. They couldn't see her yet because she hadn't stepped through, but there she was, watching her parents talk on the couch.
They looked normal, with the exception of the bags around their eyes - a sign that perhaps they hadn't gotten enough sleep. Andorra tried to rationalize why it was important for her to leave, why going to Anlithamy was more important than living a fake life, but it was hard. Seeing her parents was hard.
She wanted to step out of the in-between and hug them, but she forced herself back. She forced herself to stay put, using the last of her willpower to not cry, which she wanted to do so badly.
Instead, she hugged herself, hating the homesickness that washed over her, wishing not for the first time that she had just been born normal. A normal girl, living with her normal parents, having normal dreams.
That life was so easy, so in reach, but she knew she couldn't return to it.
She imagined she was back in the Palace and then she was there, still in the in-between, looking at Noah in his bedroom. She hadn't realized she'd transported to him, but then she realized that when she thought of the snow kingdom, she thought of Noah and Noah alone.
He was laying on his bed, tossing a tennis ball up above his head, catching it so swiftly there was no reason to believe he'd ever drop it. She watched the way his eyes followed the ball, his face carefully blank and emotionless.
He looked like a normal young adult then, laying on his bed like Andorra pictured teenage boys would do. She yearned to run her hands through his hair, pushing them up away from his eyes. She wanted to lay on the bed with him, in his arms, safe and sound from everyone.
She wanted it so much she found herself stepping into the real world, stumbling into his room. For a moment, nothing changed because Noah didn't even look at her. She wondered if she messed up somehow, if she'd come out invisible, but then he caught the ball and sat up, blinking at her and then at the door.
Her cheeks burned. "I uh, transported in here on accident."
A slow grin burned across his face. "On accident, huh?"
She knotted her hands together and then sat on the edge of his bed, too aware of how close she was sitting to him, feeling the burning heat inside of her that made her wonder what it was. It wasn't anger, it was something else, something that burned slow inside of her, making her stomach erupt into butterflies.
"I've been practicing teleporting. I went all over the palace, and then I went to Maine, thinking it would be fun, but it wasn't. I really miss them. My parents. I mean, my human parents, not my birth ones."
She felt a hand on her back, steady and comforting. She felt Noah rub her back, leaning in closer to her. "It's okay to miss them, Andy. No one blames you for missing them. It'd be weird if you didn't."
She turned and leaned into him, hiding her face, feeling the tears well up in her eyes. "It doesn't feel fair sometimes. They didn't deserve this, to forget about me, to be lonely without me. And I didn't deserve it either, the whole being ripped apart from them thing."
It was comforting to feel his arms around her, anchoring her. And Noah felt like this was where they both belonged, in each others arms, hiding from the real world. He had longed to do this for so long, to casually hold her as if they had nothing to hide. He had longed to pull her into his arms since the first time he saw her in school, and now it was a reality for both of them. It calmed something within him, something that had felt a lot like a sunken hole for far too long.
"No, they didn't, and you don't either. The world is a cruel place. But, I have a feeling if they knew what you were and what you were really doing, they would support you. They'd love you regardless."
She leaned back to look into his eyes, admiring the light in them. "I know they would. I almost wish that they knew, that they could support me. That they knew I was alive and safe and they knew that I loved them, so much. I just want to tell them that I love them one last time."
Noah pulled her further onto his lap, so that she was nearly straddling him, and he tightened his arms around her, putting his face in her hair. "I know you do." And he loved that Andorra missed her parents. He loved the human heart inside of her that hadn't been crushed or ruined by those who had hurt her. He loved her for that.
He ran his hands down her back and around her sides, letting his fingers run through her silky hair. A dream, that's what this is, he thought to himself. He loved having her in his arms, loved hearing about her thoughts and feelings and emotions, but even more he loved that she ran to him with her problems. He loved that it was him that she trusted and confided in, even when he was so cold to her, even when he pushed her away. Of course, he hated doing it, and he hated that in Anltihamy, there was no future for them, but he was selfish and he wanted her, all of her, while he could.
In his fantasies, Andorra had never left them. In his fantasies, Andorra grew up alongside him and Oberon, running in the backyard, playing hide and seek in the palace, laughing in the kitchen over poorly baked desserts. In his fantasies, she'd fallen in love with him right there in the palace, stealing kisses between the bookcases of the study, going into town together hand and hand, stargazing in the winter snow during the cloudless nights.
But somehow this was better. Losing her had made him fall so much more in love with her.
She leaned back in his arms, her eyes watery. He let her run her hands through his dark hair and down his face, cupping his cheeks. She tucked the loose wisps of hair behind his ears, and then she smiled.
"I must be dreaming," she said, her words barely a whisper. "I must be dreaming because the Noah I know would never let me be this close to him."
His hands halted their movements, settling on her waist. "The Noah you know regrets pushing you away. But, Andy, I had to do it. When you thought you were human, I didn't want to steal you away because you loved me. I wanted you to come to us because you thought we deserved you and your kindness. And because I knew we can't be together, I didn't want to even try it with you. But now that you're here..." He closed his eyes.
"So we hide this." Andorra offered.
The thing was, Noah didn't want to hide this. He wanted everyone to know just how much he was hers. But he knew better and so he placed a kiss under her jaw. "We have to be careful."
His lips were cool against her neck, and she felt almost delirious with that one kiss. "I want to try to teleport with you."
He leaned from her, hands giving her waist a squeeze. "If you think you can do it, I'm here along for the ride."
She tightened her legs around him. "Okay, hold on tight and don't let go. I'm not sure how this will work, but I want to try."
She closed her eyes and with her mind, created that rip. She made it the normal size for just her, then she widened the rip, trying to guess how big it had to be for the two of them. Once it was what she deemed big enough, she tried to pull the two of them through the rip.
It was harder than she thought. Her mind strained with the effort to pull them both through, and for a moment, her head pounded. She felt something wet above her lip, and she knew it was a bloody nose.
"Andy, Andy stop. It's okay if you can't just yet. You're bleeding, love. Hey," She felt him touch her cheek, but she didn't open her eyes. Not until she finally yanked the two of them through, and when she opened her eyes, the world around them shimmered.
Noah didn't even look; he stared at her face, worry drowning in his features. She rubbed the back of her hand across the space between her upper lip and her nose until the blood was gone. "I'm fine, see? Now, where should we go?"
He didn't look entirely convinced. "Uh, alright. Let's go see what Oberon's up to."
Andorra grinned and then pictured Oberon. It took a moment for them to get there, just because of the extra effort she had to put in due to Noah being with her, but finally their surroundings glimmered and there were there, in the kitchen, with Oberon. He was wiping down the counters, humming a song to himself.
"Shall we scare him?" Andorra proposed, still seated on Noah's lap as if they'd never moved from the bed. She let her hands rest on Noah's shoulders, excitedly squeezing them.
"Is that a good idea?" He asked, his voice nervous but his face open to her, displaying all of his emotions, no longer hiding from her.
"I think so. Why will Obe care if we're seen together?" She pulled the both of them through, mentally focusing on making the rip big enough, and then they tumbled to the ground, tangled up in each other's arms.
Oberon yelled, jumped into the air and away from them, his hand on his heart. For a moment, he stared with his mouth open and his eyes wide, and then he let out a nervous laugh. "How did you two do that?"
Andorra popped off of the ground first, excitement clear in her eyes. "I learned how to teleport! How cool is that?" And just to show off, she slipped through time and space again and then reentered their world right behind Oberon, poking him in the back. "Boo!"
Oberon jumped and spun, his hand still on his heart. "What the fuck? How did you do that so fast?"
She grinned again. "I'm good, aren't I?" She looked at Noah, who had stood up, his face carefully blank. He slipped his hands into his pockets, trying to look unimpressed. She turned back to Oberon. "I'm going to get us all into Anlithamy pretty soon! I'm getting good at pulling myself through, but now I'm trying to practice bringing more people through to create the gate. With some practice, I'm sure it'll work!"
Noah didn't say anything about the bloody nose, and Andorra didn't say anything about her raging headache. She was far too excited to care about the way her head pounded in discomfort from all the effort she'd put into traveling with two people. In her mind, it was nothing compared to how it felt to accomplish something.
"That's real cool." Oberon offered up a fist bump. "I knew you'd be amazing. And I can't believe the Princess wants to be friends with me. Wow."
Andorra let out a laugh. "You're silly. Of course I wanna be your friend. Noah does too but he's too stubborn to admit it."
Noah's eyes narrowed at her, but by the time Oberon had turned to look, Noah's face had smoothed back into indifference. "Oh, does he now?"
"He does." She looked back to Noah. "Should we go back? Leave you alone to do your work?"
Oberon picked back up the rag he was using to wipe down the tables and offered a sheepish smile. "If I'm caught fraternizing with the Princess and Sir Noah, I may get in trouble. Especially since my chores aren't done."
Andorra gave him a sympathetic look, wishing there was something she could do to help. She gave him a quick side hug then skipped to Noah, reaching for his arm. "Let's go back, then! If you wanna make it through, hold on tight."
"I don't think it's a good idea. We can walk back."
Andorra bristled at his words, only because it told her just how much he didn't believe in her. He didn't want her to try it again because he didn't think she could do it, which burned her more than she thought it would. She wanted him to trust her.
"Are you saying I can't do it?" She challenged, an edge to her tone.
His face was still a blank stare. "No, I'm not saying that. I just think you need more practice before pulling two people through like that."
She straightened her back, looking him in the eye. She knew that the Andorra she used to be would have backed down completely, would have nodded and complied with his words, but she was stubborn, now. She was angry and thirsty for achievement, thirsty for making him proud of her.
"I've had plenty of practice."
"Your nose was bleeding, Andorra. Don't be stupid and reckless because you want to prove me wrong."
She crossed her arms, feeling there heat of anger in her veins at his response to her. She couldn't tell if he was acting this way because of Oberon in the kitchen, watching their interaction with widened eyes, or if he was truly back to being mean to her. She wanted to believe it had more to do with Oberon than it did with her.
"Fine, if you don't want to practice with me, I'll find my trainer. I bet he'll be pushing me to do more and more, and by the next time you see me, I'll be bringing us all over to Anlithamy." She flicked her hair over her shoulder as she spun on her heel, not even offering a smile to Oberon as she stomped away, upset at Noah.
Her trainer would want her to work on this, with him certainly, but she had wanted to do it with Noah, not with her trainer. She wanted to spend time with the dark haired boy who made her feel as though she were walking on water, floating in the clouds, working to become the best version of herself.
But, she wasn't about to let him stop her from proceeding. She knew it had taken a lot of effort, and she knew it was dangerous, but she also knew without practice, she couldn't get them anywhere.
Whether or not Noah wanted to help wasn't going to stop her. She had a kingdom to claim, even if she wasn't ready.
* * *
THE SEQUEL IS ALMOST HERE!
Go check it out on my page and leave a vote on the prologue! I'll be picking a random voter to dedicate my first chapter to!
GOLDEN will be released January 1, 2021
See you soon ;)