I placed a small bag of mine on the sink counter, wandering my fingers in it to search for my body lotion. The honeymoon that Jisoo had been teasing me about was finally happening and I couldn't eradicate the disquiet. Even my hands were trembling. That was how my nerves were thumping. How unfortunate it was for me when the nervousness of walking down the aisle earlier in the morning was still fresh in my chest, and another wave came in now, ready to wreck every border I had been securing in me.
It wasn't that Melissa and I never slept together before. We had some serious sexual encounters before but we never went too far. It was only Melissa who asked me touched her 10 years ago and the memory of it left in my head, never went out. It stayed there.
Back then she seemed so opened about it like it didn't really matter to her. But getting to know what a closed person she was from her brother, I guessed I was wrong in reading her. I used to think that she was so comfortable doing those things because she had done it before, which she did anyway. The truth was she was only opened and comfortable doing it with me and not anyone else.
Me on the other hand never went too far with her. And Melissa, as a lovely and passionate girl she was back then, she never pushed me to do it either. Even though she could easily get it, realising how weak I was each time I was under her touch, she never used the influence she had over me.
Even when she had me just by the touch of her lips last week, she still honoured me as a lady she loved. She still respected me as the one she was going to marry. The integrity and grace she was well equipped with, helped her to fight her own desires, and she won.
I squeezed the bottle while the lotion came onto my palm and I spread it on my skin. I guessed it was actually a good idea from Jisoo to buy the whole set instead of just the perfume. At least it would last longer on me. Melissa would definitely love it since she was acting weird these days; sniffing me at any time she got the chance to.
She didn't do that only on my skin but my hair too, and her favourite spot was definitely my ears. I didn't know what was the obsession she had over my ears. She did tell me though but I certainly couldn't understand what she was talking about. She just said that sweats smelled stronger around the hairline and ears. God could give me a thousand years to be married to this woman, and I would probably still couldn't understand the sexual preferences she had in me, let alone her dirty jokes and talks. Sometimes I didn't even know if she was serious about it.
She definitely got issues; weird obsessions towards me in a way that I loved, of course.
Nevertheless, I wasn't that typical church girl next to your confession box either. I had my own sexual obsession in her too, especially her smell. I just kept it low since that was one of the ways I could recognise her without the need to touch. I started to smell her even since I was still a teen, going to the same school as her. That was how I trained myself to know when she walked past me, or just being near around. I still couldn't get rid of that habit until now.
Her lips were the wonders in the world for me and she knew it just by the way I reacted to her kiss. She knew how to use them right too, which drove me insane!
I put on my night dress after I had the cherry blossom lotion all over my body. The fabric was less in length, the kind of short that I never wore before. It was a satin, yellow coloured night dress that ended somewhere around the thigh area. Jisoo said it would look good on me since it reflected my skin tone so well, plus it was Melissa's favourite colour.
I realised how comfortable the fabric was on my skin when I finally put it on. It was stretchable and so smooth in hands. I should thank Jisoo for her good choices; the body lotion and also this night dress. She was definitely the best friend who I would enjoy to go out shopping with.
Going for the final touch, I fixed my hair even though I couldn't see it. I just did it anyway only for my own confidence. It didn't take much efforts also since I just ran my fingers through them with my hair serum. I genuinely didn't want Melissa to wait any longer, considering she really hated waiting. She already had her shower before I went in for mine earlier, I was aware that I had already taken so much time.
So I just took a quick fix on my hair and I exited the bathroom.
"Lisa?" I called her softly, switching off the bathroom light. "Sorry I took too long,"
I walked towards the bed slowly, where I guessed Melissa would be, thinking that was the last spot she was on before I went for bath. I did the mapping for this suite since it was a different one, but it wasn't that perfect yet. Melissa helped me with the details also, like the locations for table and chair that had sharp edges for me to really be careful with.
I kept my pace slow, being cautious and calculating steps until I reached the wooden bed. I put my hands on the mattress and climbed on it, covering my feet under the blanket.
Melissa on the other hand didn't even say a word to me since I exited the bathroom.
"Lisa?" I called again as I scooted to the centre of the bed but I still didn't get any reply from her. Is she really on the bed? Or she's at the living area?
I pushed my hands forward, trailing the mattress with my palms until they reached a cold body.
"Hey, Lisa?"
She was definitely there on the bed with me as I could feel her arm. But her skin felt so cold, probably because she was exposed to the air conditioning. And she didn't give me any response at all. So I brought my hand to her face, thinking that she might be sleeping. And when my fingers reached her eyes, they were completely shut.
I sighed loudly. Was she in a serious sleep right now? On our wedding night? Lisa was sleeping on our wedding night?
If I was being me, worrying about her didn't get enough rest and sleep, I wouldn't wake her from sleep, ever. But this was our wedding night, and I got ready just for her. I wouldn't put this sexy night dress on and smell like flowers for nothing.
"Lisa?"
Nothing.
So I went for her shoulder, shaking her a little.
"Lisa, wake up" I shook harder this time but she still didn't answer me.
So I held her face with both of my hands, slapping her cheek softly. "Lisa, come on!" I began to whine but then, I noticed something wasn't right.
I couldn't feel her breath on my hands, at all.
I placed two fingers under her nose, and felt nothing.
"Lisa?!"
I called her louder as panic started to rush in. So I placed my hands on her chest, and it was just static. It didn't go up and down.
"Lisa!!!"
Tears started to form at the back of my eyes as fast as my heart was beating right now. I kept calling for her, shaking her body but nothing good happened yet. I had no idea what to do, even my breathing was getting out of place. She had been so quiet this whole day so I thought she might be too nervous about the wedding. I didn't know that she wasn't feeling well or anything.
When my cries fell on my cheeks, a loud groan knocked my eardrums right after.
"Lisa?!" I exclaimed, holding her head in my hands strongly. "Hey!!!"
"Roseanne!" She half yelled, gasping for air like she had trouble breathing. "Roseanne!"
"Lisa! What's the matter?!" I cupped her face. "What happened?! Are you okay?!"
"Roseanne!"
Her chest was moving now as she breathed heavily. And her grip around my arms were strong.
"Lisa talk to me! What's wrong?! Are you okay?" I almost sobbed as I was dying to hear her.
"Roseanne, you wouldn't believe me, but I saw you just now-" Her speech got interrupted as she tried to breathe. "...walking out from the bathroom"
"And?!"
"And I just died,"
"What?!" I exclaimed as I frowned, squeezing my eyes.
"You are so beautiful you took my breath away"
My blood started to boil as soon as I heard her giggles. I knew that giggle. I knew it too well!
"Are you serious, Lisa?!"
There was no tenderness in my voice now, only building anger when my panic earlier changed into temper just in a split second.
"Baby..." She stroked my arm but I pulled my hand away immediately.
"Don't baby me!" I pressed on each word with gritted teeth.
"I was just joking"
She still had the silliness in her tone even though she might see with her eyes how mad my face had turned now, which burned the fire in me with a can of gasoline.
"Don't touch me!" I raised my voice a little when I felt her arms around my waist as I was shifting my position, trying to leave the bed.
"Hey, I said I was joking"
Now her voice changed, sounding like she was nervous all of the sudden.
"It's not funny!" My anger was coming out slowly. "You scared me, Lisa!" I tried to take her hands off me but she tightened her arms, totally lying in between my lap to pin me from getting up.
"No no no, baby..." Lisa did her charm straight away, trying to plead. "Please don't get mad at me, we just got married"
"Well, don't you know that your wife is fucking blind?!" My voice began to crack as I felt like I was going to sob.
"Roseanne, why are you talking like this?"
"I can't see you, Lisa!" I finally let out my cries when my chest had been too heavy for me to handle. "I won't know if you are okay or not!" I was still trying to push her off my lap. "All I can do is touching you!"
"Okay,"
Melissa got up all of the sudden. Her movement was harsh and it did send fear in me. Then she grasped both of my hands and placed them on her face.
"Touch me now, how do I feel like?"
She still had her grip around my wrists, forcing me to hold her head.
"Tell me, Roseanne," She asked me once again and I knew she was serious now. Her voice told it all. "Do I feel like I am not well? Injured or something?"
"I don't know-"
"Touch harder then. Am I still breathing?"
She let go of my hands, bringing her arms around my waist again as we were sitting on the bed. So I ran my hands down to her neck and along her body frame, feeling her with my fingers. Melissa was quiet as she let me touched her just like she asked me to, and I finished it with a soft stroke on her cheeks.
"How was it?" She asked. "Feel better?"
"A little," I answer shortly, lowering my head.
"Hey," Melissa whispered while her hand cupped my chin, pushing my head back up. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have joked like that"
I just nodded as I pressed both of my lips together to suppress another sob that wanted to come out.
But she could probably feel that I was still upset with her, so she tried again.
"I know you always worry about me, Roseanne..." She took my hands, kissing them softly. "I'm fine, and very well happy with you now"
I could feel she was smiling as I was touching her face. Her cheeks were up and her lips curved.
"Are you really?" I asked, sniffling a bit.
"Never been better, baby..." She continued to smile and I sighed again.
Melissa was just joking and I went mad at her on our wedding night. I didn't mean to but I was really worried. I couldn't see her physical condition. What if something bad actually happened to her, just beside me, and I didn't even notice it as early as I should?
I might be overthinking now but that was the fear blind people had for their loved ones. We just couldn't control the clumsiness and be worried all the time. We depended entirely on sounds; things we heard, and when it suddenly quiet without any noise, we would start thinking about something negative.
"Am I forgiven?" Melissa let out another question because I didn't talk.
"Yeah"
"Can I have a kiss, then?"
I leaned in closer until our nose touched and Melissa caught my lips with hers.
But I pulled away in just a second, making the kiss as close as a peck on her mouth only.
"Just that?" She sounded like she was whining while her hands roamed at my stomach.
"You asked for a kiss" I began to tease her as I was actually getting nervous under her touch.
"I love this dress, Roseanne..."
"Really?" I let out a smile and she hummed to respond. "I looked for this colour in so many stores, at the mall"
"What?" There was a surprise in her tone. "What were you troubling yourself for, baby?"
Her cold palms were on my face now, holding it so dearly as she might be looking at me while she spoke. I breathed in deeply when the space inside my eyes were getting smaller by the tears, sending another pain around my jaw.
"For you, Lisa"
I answered her question, proudly.
Looking for this night dress wasn't even a trouble for me. I even wrote a book. I stayed alone for years. I hurt my own mother. I flew all the way from Australia back to Seoul. What were these troubles for?
They were all for her.
There was no trouble in the world I wouldn't do for Melissa.
"Thank you baby," She muttered. "Can I please get more kisses?"
I nodded and she pulled me until our lips met again. I kissed her back this time.
Her minty breath now lingered in the air that I was taking, clashing with the sweetness of her lip balm that tasted like strawberry in the summer; warm and refreshing. It was fascinating to me that how every kiss from her had its own surprise, jolting me in an endless drought of thirst even with this honeyed, wetness of her mouth on mine.
She made me craved for more, even so.
Melissa shifted our positions without breaking the kiss and I followed the pressure she put on me, pushing me to the mattress with her strong arms protecting my back while she laid me down.
My breathing was getting heavier with my head rested on the pillow, feeling the weight she put next to my right ear. We had never been in this position before where both of us were resting on the bed, especially Melissa, and I could feel how comfortable she was, kissing me passionately.
But there was a catch for her to be in this position; she only had one hand to touch me. It was limited for her even though the Lisa I knew could conquer my world just by her lips and touches. Both of them would join in coherent, making a bold, strong troupe of pleasure to make their own triumph in just one attack. But this time she was lacking in one of her soldiers, which had became a challenge to her.
After a moment of sucking her lips in a slow, calm movement of her mouth, Melissa quickened the pace as she added more pressure on mine while her hand now trailing to my neck, and I held it by the wrist. My other one was tugging her shirt as it helped to calm me a little, making me feel like I still got the control.
She started to let out whimpers that were no longer low, suppressed or lost among mine. They were really audible this time like she finally let her feelings out, which sounding so attractive and raspy to my sense. She was kissing me hard like the way she did right before we went out for fitting in Seoul and it created a massive amount of lust and greed into my chest that already cramped in space for air.
I felt her tongue on my bottom lip as she loved to press the flesh with it, making me feel like my mouth was going to get swollen after. Then she slid her tongue in, surprising me with that sudden gesture. It was so swift and strong at the same time, entering my mouth as if she wanted to taste that area too.
But even with a kissing style that she never did before, her tongue was still gliding in such a beautiful rhythm, twirling with mine and she would withdraw it each time she closed the kiss and slid it back in. It felt intimidating at first along with her fast pace that really suited the kiss in a harsh melody, but just within seconds of familiarising with her new movement, then I started to feel its pleasure.
Melissa probably knew what a good kisser she was since I caught her smiling in the kiss, and I continued to kiss her, pushing my lips forward to hers like no tomorrow. She might steal glances at me and noticed how my eyes remained closed for as long as I felt her lips on my mine. That was how good it felt when she kissed me. She kissed me so good.
"Lisa..." I breathed out when she parted her mouth from me, almost sounding like a begging to her not to stop the kiss but she brought her lips to somewhere else, leaving soft trail of kisses on my cheek and she pushed herself down.
I held her head as soon as her mouth landed on my neck, because it wasn't soft at all. She really pushed her face onto my skin, sniffing it as her breath was getting faster, and her lips began to suck on it hard.
Melissa freed herself from the previous position as she climbed on top of me, sliding both of her arms under my body to pin me down.
I ran my fingers through her hair, holding them slightly as my other hand hugging her by the waist as she continued to suck. I was sure it would leave marks like she once did back then. But I let her.
She continued to nibble, pressing the flesh in between her lips and she pulled slightly, causing my body to quiver. However, she didn't stay there long since she was probably sure of what she had always wanted, which was why she slowly making her way there.
Unwilling to leave any spot on me untouched, her mouth kept dragging the wetness across my chest, stopping to bite on my collarbone for a while then continued to the centre of my body.
Melissa moved her hands down to my waist and she pulled the dress up, making it even shorter to cover my thighs. They weren't covered anymore now. She skipped her attention to my chest as she went for my stomach instead, started giggling there all of the sudden. It tickled.
"Lisa!" I slapped her arm playfully, chuckling.
"Roseanne," She started to talk after being quiet for so long. "This dress makes you even more beautiful"
I laughed more when she addressed her favouritism towards this yellow satin fabric, making me flatter that my choice was right. It was definitely the right colour to wear for a wedding night. Melissa loved it so much.
"But could you please take it off for me?" She sounded serious all of the sudden, probably looking straight at me. "Before I rip it"
Her voice changed when no more giggles in her tone, giving me instant goosebumps. I almost gasped when I heard her. The sentence she used frighten me if I had to be frank. Was it a threat? I guessed it was but in sexual way, and I kind of liked it actually.
I breathed deeply, trying to shift a little under her pinning. "You want this off?" I asked with confidence in my voice since I didn't want to look too submissive to her. I would have made everything easier for her if I did and I wasn't fancy of that idea. I had been waiting for 10 years for her, so if she wanted me the way I wanted her, she would need to work for it.
"Yes Roseanne, I want this off" She responded to my question that was referring to the night dress.
"Do it yourself," I answered her boldly, without the need to use even half of my voice, or pressing each word at the back of my throat. Nothing like those. I just used a whisper that was soft, and low enough for her ears to pick up, but with a sharp spark that I directed to the threshold of her lust. "Do me, Lisa"
I could hear her breathing as her chest was thumping against my thighs, probably trying so hard to hold any sense of patience left in her. "Do me as you please..." I finished my sentence, not moving from my previous tone, challenging her to the maximum of her desires and imaginations of what I might and might not liked.
Melissa got up from her pinning position, abruptly. She went to sit on my hips after she pushed the fabric above my stomach, exposing my underwear to the cold, air conditioning atmosphere.
"Okay then," She spoke in whisper too, sounding even threatening than before. She continued to push the dress up to my chest, and she grabbed both of my hands to place them over my head, harshly. "But make sure you don't regret that,"
She finally pulled the dress all the way off my hands and I heard she threw it somewhere in this room. She caught my lips for a moment, parting it after leaving few nibbles on the bottom one. "...because this time, Roseanne," Lisa kissed me again while her hands now roamed on my naked chest, stroking up and down from the shoulder and back to the chest with the pressure she put by her fingers. "...you won't be getting any time-out"
I didn't even get to object to that or let out the surprise under my breath, because Melissa moved so fast as she gripped both of my wrists and pinned them on the mattress with her body weight, and she began to attack my nipples.
My eyes squeezed shut automatically as my legs kicking up to move, which was near impossible since I had Melissa sitting on top of me. My movements were influenced by the arousal I felt around my nipple, having the whole areola inside her mouth.
"Lisa..." I couldn't hold my moans for this kind of pleasure. Her mouth was warm and the way she used it feel so amazing until I started to get headache just to compress the satisfaction.
Melissa wouldn't stop, putting all of her strength to lock me in place as I struggled to free my hands. And she moved to the other nipple of mine, sucking in and pushing out with her tongue to create this pleasurable motion against her lips. My body was feeling so much as it absorbed everything, inviting the throbbing in between my legs.
The moans she made ignite my lust even more. She sounded so desperate as if she couldn't get enough of my nipples, considering her pace that didn't change at all, not even a little. She maintained her rough sucking, licking and twirling around my nipple that was so erected now, and she caught it back inside her mouth.
I turned my head to the side, feeling the pleasure she was giving me that was so rich and strong. I had always loved her tenderness and how soft she was as a loving person I knew, but there was something appealing about her rough. It actually exposed how weak and insecure she was, being all greedy to have me all for herself. She showed me that I was her weakness, and she let that drove her to act with this tough persona.
As for me, nothing else turned me on better than a rough Lisa.
My whimper echoed in my own ears as Melissa was taking her time to really feel my nipples that seemed like to be one of her obsessions. The excitement sparked my nerves, causing me to bite my own arm to suppress the moans that were eager to come out. Groans slid over my tongue instead since my mouth was no longer opened, and Melissa stopped her aggression suddenly.
She went back up, fingers grabbing my chin as she pulled my face to hers and her lips gave a quick kiss on mine.
"Roseanne..." She called, out of breath.
"Y-yeah?"
"Don't do that, baby" She kissed me again and again before pulling away. "I want to hear you..."
She released both of my hands at last while she went down again, sucking my nipples just for another few seconds, and she trailed down to my stomach with her teeth nibbling the skin.
I definitely jumped to that, hands gripping her arms that were putting weight on my hips. Her tongue started licking and sucking my stomach as it tickled with a different sensation compared to the ones she gave on my chest. I couldn't even breathe right to that but she just added more pleasure for me to contain.
Melissa got up since I could feel a pressure on the mattress. Then she parted my legs unexpectedly, putting herself in between and her fingers lingered at the hem of my underwear.
"Lisa!"
I exclaimed with a full voice because I was aware of what she was going to do, but I was too late. The only fabric that I had on my body was now off from its original spot, gliding along my legs until it slipped from my toes. So I closed my legs back, trying to hide my private part from Melissa's eyes.
She grasped my legs as she began to kiss my skin there. She held them tight with her arms, pushing herself up to my right ankle. That gesture touched my heart in an instant when I felt her lips there, kissing the same ankle that sprained 10 years ago.
"Are you okay, Roseanne?"
I heard her voice that was so soothing and calming. I wasn't sure about her question though. I didn't know if she was just teasing me about the first question she asked when she found me on the road back then, or if she simply asked me if I was fine with all these sexual pleasures she attacked me with.
"I'm fine," I answered her anyway.
So she pushed her hand in between my thighs, trying to part my legs with her strength that I couldn't hold.
I got so nervous all of the sudden, feeling like I was about to have a panic attack. I had both of my legs over her shoulders as she placed them there, so she was probably looking at my womanhood for the first time.
My face heated up in embarrassment, gripping her hair in between my fingers now. And to add more to it, I was feeling the warmth of her breath, spreading all over the fold and it gave me a clue of how close she was to that sensitive part of mine.
Melissa was strict enough not to wait, just like what she said earlier; there would be no timeout for me this time, and I got a huge surprise when her cold lips landed on my skin.
"Lisa, wait-"
I knew she wouldn't, but I asked anyway since she was being kind enough to be gentle there. She continued to give me more kisses, and each time she pushed her lips forward, her nose would sniff the scent in, which made me even more embarrassed than I already was.
My fingers ran through her hair, tugging them to the back at the same time so they wouldn't bother her face. Melissa on the other hand pushed one of my legs to open the space wider for her and by that, she slid her tongue in.
I heaved as my body arched up, kicking the linen with my legs while Melissa's tongue moved along my wet fold; from the bottom to the top until it found my clit. She played with it gently and I slammed my head back on the pillow, trembling so bad.
My heart was racing now when I tried to hold this new, yet already fulfilling pleasure that I started to love, and Melissa quickened the pace when she noticed that I was getting comfortable with the arousing gesture she put on me. The licking and twirling she made against my clit were absolute madness as they made the throbbing feeling even worse. But when I thought that sensation was the strongest I needed to handle, I almost lost my mind when Melissa sucked the swollen clit of mine out of the blue.
I half yelled to that surprise as my body quivered. She was taking in all of my wetness, licking and sucking as the noise was audible, followed by her moans. I was so embarrassed but flattered at the same time when her tongue moved like she really loved 'tasting' me. And the pressure that she put on my clit had just became unbearable.
I started to feel this wave that was coming, but I wasn't sure if it was the climax that I used to learn about. I couldn't even think straight at that time, drowning with all those sensations and her name was the only word I could utter.
Tightening my grip on her hair, I felt the sweat that formed on her scalp and she could probably tell what was happening to me since she quickened her pace. And she stopped when my hips trembled, letting me to have my first orgasm that I never felt before. It was a rushed, sudden excitement that plunged into my desire, giving a new kind of satisfaction as I steady up my breath.
I didn't even get to recover from the previous pleasure when Melissa's finger went down along my slit, going straight to my entrance and she stopped there.
"Roseanne..." She called for me, placing soft kisses on my fold. "Are you scared?"
Melissa had her finger twirling around that throbbing part of mine so tenderly, like she was being so careful.
I remembered that I used to tell her I was scared, which was 10 years ago and I regretted it. If only I knew it would feel this good, I wouldn't have been so stupid not to do it. I was just plain stupid and young at that time.
"No, Lisa" I answered her without a doubt, and she climbed up to me with her hand remained there. "I'm not"
I received a different kind of kiss on my lips shortly after when she took my mouth with hers. It was passionate while her finger kept circling there, thumb continuing the simulation.
"Just nervous?" She asked again and I hummed, along with a nod to confirm. "Tell me if it hurts"
She kissed me at the side of my face and settled at my ear, probably taking her own time before she pushed her finger all the way in, penetrating the most intimate part of my body.
My scream shook the wall of my throat in hindrance, arms hugging Melissa's neck as I didn't expect the pain. But she didn't move even a little, let alone withdrawing her finger. She just stayed inside me as the pain started to spread.
"Lisa, it hurts..." I cried softly while she breathed against my hair.
"That's alright, baby" She whispered and to add to my surprise, I did feel calm when she talked like this no matter how nervous I was at that moment. "It will feel better soon"
And I believed her.
Melissa started to move her finger slowly as I tightened my hug around her. My mind drove away from the reality. I was lost, remembering the pleasure of having sex with the love of my life. My eyes now filled with more tears as my chest had became heavy, thinking that this wasn't just plain sexual, but it was so emotional for me as well.
I had been building walls in me for years that nobody could climb. But I let her in with all of my love, watching her wrecking every single brick that I spent my tears on. There wasn't any wall left. I totally gave everything to her, my Melissa.
There was no more walls but that was okay.
Let's build new ones and make a home, Lisa.
"I love you..." I uttered under my breath. "I love you so much"
"I love you too, Roseanne" She whispered back and she connected our lips together.
I kissed her back in eagerness as she continued gliding her finger in me, with moan after moan that left my mouth.