Night had fallen on the streets of Millennium City. The thick clouds that rolled overhead made the dank, dark corners of the metropolis seem even darker. And the street where Koffee Klatch stood held a hint of the sinister, as Sal, Yvonne and Nancy pushed rental scooters past their workplace. Other stores on the street were closed, though a few restaurants still stayed open. Sal huffed and puffed as he trailed behind his co-workers. Nancy turned back to them.
"Are you sure we have enough?"
"We need as many as possible, to make sure the alley is a choice spot for them to stop." Yvonne checked her app. "There are still a few a couple blocks over."
Sal stopped in his tracks. "Ugh! Ten is enough. I'm not going to go a couple blocks over to grab more scooters. I'm exhausted. Besides, we don't want to make it too obvious, or they'll get suspicious."
Two African-American teens came from the opposite direction. One of them had a scooter, but the other was on foot. He looked to the group with a spark of hope in his eyes.
"Are you done with that scooter?"
"Get lost, kid. We need these."
Nancy shot Sal an annoyed glare. She turned back to the youths. "Don't listen to him. Here. Of course, you can use it."
"Thanks!!"
He took the scooter from her and pulled out his cell phone. The young teen activated the scooter and turned to Sal.
"Screw you, Fatso!"
He laughed and rode off with his friend. Sal shot Nancy a death glare.
"Why did you give him that? We need those!"
"I couldn't keep it from him. If we're going to be protectors of the city, we can't be mean to the people who live here. Besides, what are we going to do if someone comes into the alley to use them?"
"That alley is gross. I wouldn't even go down there if we didn't have ..." Yvonne looked around, to make sure no one on the street could hear her. "... you know, superpowers."
"We should have brought Max, even though he's a normal. His superpower could be getting us the scooters. He could be, like, our sidekick."
"Yeah, right. A sidekick who looks more like the main hero."
Sal had a GoPro camera attached to a helmet on his head and looked around. A voice sounded in his ear, and he put a finger to the AirPod that was lodged in it, the same kind his friends wore.
"Guys, what are you doing? The alley is half a block back."
"Oh!" He laughed. "Sorry, Rebecca. I wasn't paying attention. Say ... your hacking into our AirPods isn't going to ruin them, is it? Because these things are literally the only material possessions I have that are worth anything. And I should have used the money to start repaying my student loans."
"God, can you stop talking about your student loans? We literally and figuratively can't forget about them. It's the only thing that comes out of your mouth." Yvonne turned the scooter she had back into the alley they had just passed.
"Don't worry about your AirPods," Rebecca's voice announced into their ears. "I keep telling you, it's a program I installed in your phones. I didn't hack them. Look, just take your positions in the alley."
The alleyway was dark and shadowy. There was a row of scooters already parked inside it, at least eight of them. Sal and Yvonne set theirs beside the others, and they walked with Nancy further down. A rectangular storage container rested at the end by a fence, on the other side of which was a building under construction, new apartments for rich city dwellers that almost looked complete. Yvonne climbed up some wooden crates that were next to the container and got on top of it. Nancy wore baggy sweats that were almost too big for her. She stopped and looked up with hesitation.
"Do we really have to go up there?" She waved a hand to her attire. "This outfit is from Juicy. I paid a lot for it."
"Yeah, but those sweats don't even fit you. You got them two sizes too big, so that when you transform, you can grow into them."
"Yeah, but they were still expensive."
Yvonne pulled down her beanie, which turned into a mask with holes for her eyes and mouth.
"Come on. Put on your disguises."
Sal took off his bicycle helmet and stuffed it into his back pack. He pulled a luchador mask out and slipped it over his head. It was black, with yellow flames that sprang from the eyes, making him resemble a psychotic bumblebee. Yvonne stared down at him, unable to believe what she saw.
"Are you kidding me?"
"What? I like Mexican wrestling! It's an art form." He touched his AirPod again. "Rebecca, do I need to put the camera back on?"
"No, I told you. I've hacked into the surveillance system of the construction site. There's a view down the alley. They put it up because people were stealing their copper pipes at night."
"I thought you said you don't hack."
He could hear what sounded like a sigh through the Pod.
"I told you, I didn't hack your earpiece because I didn't have to. Because you're working with me. I didn't say I couldn't hack. I was a computer science major. Trust me, I know what I'm doing."
They looked to Nancy, who just stood there.
"What?"
"Your mask. Didn't you bring one?"
"No. Why would I? I can change shapes."
"Well, then are you going to change shape?"
"I can't do that now! I told you, I can only hold a shape for a short while. I can't shift for hours, while we wait."
Yvonne rolled her eyes. "Then you're going to want to wear a mask, so criminals can't recognize you."
"Okay, fine!" She pulled the hoodie up over her head, covering her long blonde hair. Nancy put on a pair of sunglasses and looked around. "Oh, wow. I really can't see much with these things on."
"Oh, my God. This is going to be such an epic fail."
Nancy climbed up on the crates and pulled herself onto the storage container. Sal looked up at them and laughed.
"Really guys? Is this necessary?"
"Uh, yeah. It's called a perch. If you want to be a superhero, you better get used to lurking on them. We could be up here for hours. Plus, it might give us an advantage over whoever or whatever shows up."
"Ugh, fine. I suppose I need the exercise." He patted his protruding belly, and with great effort, Sal scaled the pile of crates. He struggled and strained, and finally made his way to the edge of the storage container. "You know, for someone who says she's only doing this ironically, you're sure taking this seriously."
"Just because I'm doing this ironically, doesn't mean I want to die ironically."
With one last surge of effort, he pulled himself up. He rolled onto his back and stared up at the sky, and his two teammates.
"So what do we do now?"
"We watch. And wait."
The three stared toward the mouth of the alley, looking for any signs of treachery that might arrive.
*****
Max floated high above the city streets, almost to the level of the clouds. He didn't have to get close to the action below. His super vision allowed him to see everything.
He watched, as Sal pulled himself on top of the storage container. He looked further down, at the ten scooters stacked in a row.
"What are these doof-balls doing?"
Were his co-workers really playing at being superheroes? But, they didn't have any powers ... did they? Nancy said something about being a shapeshifter, but in all the time he had worked at Koffee Klatch, Max had never seen anything that would in any way indicate that she had that power. Then again, even his super-sight had it's limitations. It's not like he could see if someone was a superhero just by looking at them.
What they were doing was ridiculous. Then again, if there was anything on the planet that had meaning or was worth fighting for, it was the right of a person to rent a scooter for five minutes to get where they were going, just a bit faster.
At least there was a reason why they hadn't wanted him along, because they wanted to protect him. Which made Max feel a pang of ... something. He wasn't sure what. It felt like a new superpower, surging up within him, until he realized that he was simply grateful that they didn't think he was a complete jerkwad. He couldn't exactly swoop in and join them, let them know he had powers of his own, but he couldn't leave them to their own devices, either.
So Max decided to do exactly what they were doing. He would float there, and watch and wait.
*****
Yvonne gave Sal a kick to the gut, making him wake with a snort. He had fallen asleep on the storage container and groggily lifted his head, shifting his glasses back into place over his mask. Sal looked down to the end of the alley, where the lights of a van appeared. The vehicle blocked the entrance, and the three co-workers looked to one another, realizing it cut off their escape route.
If these were the villains, they would definitely have to face them.
Several muscular men got out wearing dark clothes and black leather jackets. They approached the row of scooters, eying them with interest.
"Bingo! Should we load them into the van?"
"Nah. I'm sick of throwing these things into the river. They just fish them out, anyway. Let's take care of them here." The biggest of them studied their surroundings. "This place looks pretty quiet."
The man went to the van and pulled out a sledgehammer. He walked up to one of the scooters and raised it over his head, smashing a box that controlled the machine's rental. When it came off and fell to the ground, he crushed it, and began smacking the tool against the tire, damaging it beyond repair.
While he was preoccupied with destruction, Yvonne jumped down from the storage container and yelped in pain. Nancy lowered herself, as did Sal, who groaned under the strain of his efforts.
"We have got to figure out something else. This climbing from perches is just not going to work for me."
The three stood with their chests pumped out, and the goons stopped what they were doing. They approached them from their side of the alley, and the biggest, who was apparently their leader, stepped forward.
"What the hell is this?"
"We're heroes. And if you're smart, you'll stop what you're doing and think twice about messing with us."
He laughed.
"What kind of heroes are you?"
"My name is Irony." Yvonne moved closer and faced him. "And I have the power of being able to replicate any martial arts move that I see."
Sal snickered. "Shouldn't your name be Cliche? Since you're Asi ..."
"Shut up, Dude."
The goon nodded toward Sal. "And who are you? El Lardo?"
"I'm Student Loan. I make you experience the crushing helplessness of what it's like to be pinned down by burden of student loan debt."
The men all looked to each other and laughed. Nancy clasped her hand, in front of her.
"And I'm The Ally. I can take the form and abilities of anyone or anything in the world who is disenfranchised. And I want you to know that despite our presence here, I empathize with your need to resort to a life of crime to survive, no matter how misguided your efforts."
"That's not why we're doing this. We're doing it because we're being paid, very well. The Conglomerate is footing our bill, to take down the other companies, so they can corner the market with their own scooters."
"Hunh, well, that was easy," Yvonne told the others. "We didn't even have to try to get them to confess their plot."
"No worries. You won't be around to tell anyone." The leader flicked his fingers, egging them on. "Come on. Let's see what you've got."
Yvonne gave a sidelong glance to her team. "That's your cue, Dudes. Start using your superpowers."
"Oh yeah." Sal raised his hands, and the head goon looked around in alarm. He collapsed onto the ground and stayed pinned there by an unseen force, unable to get up. The other two looked to each other and moved forward. They swung at Yvonne, who cried out.
"Do it! Immobilize them!"
"I can't! It's hard enough to focus on one."
Yvonne threw a blow at one of the henchmen and kicked him in the stomach. The man picked her up and tossed her against a wall of the alley. She fell to the ground, groaning.
"Ally! Transform."
Nancy thought for a moment. She began to shift and grow bigger, into the shape of a very tall, very muscular African-American man. He still wore her pink tights, which were stretched to their limit. She looked down at herself, as the goons stared at her for a moment in amazement.
"Oh, you guys! Is it racist that I picked the form of a big Black man?"
"Take the form of a Sumo Wrestler that would be awesome!" Sal held a hand to his temple, still concentrating on incapacitating the leader.
"Just hit them!"
Nancy took a swing at one of the goons, but he punched back, hitting her square on the jaw. She stumbled, falling to the ground.
"Oww! I guess I picked a man who isn't very good at fighting."
"Do something else!"
"Like what?"
"Tigers are an endangered species."
Nancy shifted and disappeared into her sweats, which fell to the ground. A small tiger cub struggled to make its way out of the folds of her garments, meowing. One of the goons looked to it and smiled.
"Aw! This thing is so cute!"
The kitten changed shape and grew into a much larger tiger, which lashed out with its claws, swiping his chest. The man screamed and looked down at his shirt, which was ripped, showing torn, bloody skin beneath it. The third good shook his head.
"Screw this."
He took out a gun and pointed it at Sal, who screamed.
"Aaah! Take cover!" Sal dove to the side, rolling behind a trash can. He cowered behind the metal lid, trying to shield himself. The head goon got up, no longer under the influence of his powers.
His friend pointed the gun at the tiger, which shifted back into Nancy. She stood in the alley, totally naked and screamed. She grabbed her sweats from the ground, covering herself.
In their ears, the voice of Rebecca called out to her team.
"Guys, don't worry. I've called the police. They're on the way. Just stall them."
But, the leader turned to Yvonne, pointing toward her. The second goon held his gun on her, and she gasped.
"Sorry, little ninja bitch." He turned to his henchman. "Blast her."
"And then what? Do we just leave them here?"
"Nah. We'll dump the bodies in the water with the scooters. Come on."
Yvonne stepped back, trembling in fear. As her life flashed before her eyes, a voice rose up behind her three foes.
"Hey, guys. Those are my friends. I'm going to need you to leave them alone."
They all turned and found Max, standing behind them. The goon raised his gun, but Max reached out and took it from him in a flash, wrenching it out of his hand. The man wailed in pain. "Ow!"
Max snapped it in half, and threw the two pieces aside.
"Oops. I guess that's what they call not knowing your own strength."
His hand reached out again, and he grabbed the man. Max thew him down the alley. Yvonne watched him fly past her in shock. The man hit the shipping container and fell to the ground, unconscious. The leader stared at Max, unable to believe what he was seeing. He pulled back his arm and hit him with all his might, but Max was immovable. It was like hitting a brick wall, and the leader shook out his hand and yelped in pain.
"Ooowwww!
Max grabbed him by his jacket and lifted the man, as his feet kicked helplessly in the air. He twisted and threw him into the grill of the van, so hard that he dented it. Max kicked the last man, breaking ribs with a loud crack that sent him into a wall.
Yvonne stared at him with a gaping mouth, as Nancy finished getting dressed. Sal came stumbling toward them, laughing.
"Dude, that was awesome! How did you do that?"
"I, um ... have powers, too. I'm super-strong."
He turned his head, listening.
"Come on. We've got to go. The cops are on the way."
"What? How do you know that ..."
The sounds of sirens grew louder.
"Oh." Yvonne looked around. "Which way do we go?"
Max nodded toward the shipping container.
"Up and over the wall. Come on, we need to move fast."
Yvonne went first, scrambling up the shipping container. She hopped a wooden fence and dropped onto the grounds of the new building behind them. Nancy scrambled over the wall next.
"Oh, God. Not again."
Sal stared at the crates he had to scale with dread, but Max grabbed him.
"Come on, Big Boy."
He lifted Sal and gave him a gentle toss, up to the top of the container. Sal landed perfectly, much to his surprise. He grabbed his backpack and scrambled over the fence. Max took one last look at the goons, who groaned in misery.
"You assholes deserve what you get. Stop messing with the scooters. Some of us need those things, when we're late."
He jumped over the wall, sailing gracefully with his gift of flight. Max and his friends disappeared as the noise of the sirens grew louder. Cop cars stopped behind the van with their lights flashing. The three goons looked utterly shocked, as the police officers approached them with their weapons drawn.